Jedicren
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Joined 05-24-03, id: 390103, Profile Updated: 11-20-11
Author has written 8 stories for Harry Potter, NCIS, and NCIS: Los Angeles.

Hello, I'm not sure if anybody really reads these things but I thought I'd write something about myself just in case. First off, I am an intensely cynical person with a dry sense of humor. I love to read fiction with comedy that is written intelligently, out of left field, and overly sarcastic. That being said, if a fanfiction breaks canon or the characters are not true to form, I will stop reading within a few sentences. I sound like a stiff bitch, but at least I am being honest!

Name: Ritz Cracka (that is a lie)

Sex: Female

Height: who cares

Hair color: brown

Age: 27 (on the downslope to 30)

Occupation: Lifetime student

Home: I'll leave you to wonder in vain... somewhere up north though.

fanfictions I read: This changes frequently, but right now... Harry Potter, NCIS, Burn Notice.

I enjoy reading: anything with Sirius (because I love him), NCIS, Burn Notice, and I am thinking I'm going to try some White Collar in the near future.

In the works...

Finishing my latest story, "Personal Demons." It is centered around the sudden, unexpected return of Jeanne Benoit, and how Tony chooses to deal with it. I wrote it as established TIVA, although the focus is more about the story itself than their relationship. I've thrown in bits and pieces about the relationship and how it developed, and some coworker reactions (although they are hiding the relationship from everyone). One more chapter to go!

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Life and Times by Jewels5 reviews
She was dramatic. He was dynamic. She was precise. He was impulsive. He was James, and she was Lily, and one day they shared a kiss, but before that they shared many arguments, for he was cocky, and she was sweet, and matters of the heart require time.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 36 - Words: 613,762 - Reviews: 9520 - Favs: 7,418 - Follows: 7,046 - Updated: 8/30/2013 - Published: 7/8/2009 - James P., Lily Evans P.
Shadows by peanutbutterer reviews
K/D tag to 4x23, Parley.
NCIS: Los Angeles - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,209 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 19 - Published: 5/8/2013 - Kensi B., M. Deeks - Complete
Overlap by brightblue reviews
Missing scenes from Berlin. What happened between the pre-nap in the hotel and the club... Tony/Ziva UST.
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,518 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 7 - Published: 5/6/2013 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete
In Transit by jelenamichel reviews
An investigation takes the team to Pearl Harbor as Tony and Ziva try to navigate their 'relationship', Gibbs tries to look the other way, and McGee tries to get a clue. Case fic-ish.
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Romance/Crime - Chapters: 17 - Words: 57,444 - Reviews: 469 - Favs: 234 - Follows: 125 - Updated: 9/5/2010 - Published: 7/9/2010 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete
Deja Vu by j3nnee reviews
While heading out on FBI business with Peter, Neal has a flash back. Season 1 spoilers, whumpage eventually and lots of angst.
White Collar - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Suspense - Chapters: 6 - Words: 18,030 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 7/17/2010 - Published: 7/11/2010 - Neal C., Peter B. - Complete
Jet Lag by Trivette Lover Heather reviews
Individual Series of Tags to the Season Seven Episode, Jet Lag.
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,496 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 20 - Published: 2/2/2010 - Tony D., Ziva D.
Easily Entertained by sillybella reviews
Exactly how do the Cullens tease Edward before he goes to watch Bella sleep? Comes before Her Worst Nightmare.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,478 - Reviews: 228 - Favs: 401 - Follows: 60 - Published: 12/5/2006 - Complete
Siriusly Deluded by fiery-skies reviews
We all know that Lily had a lot to do with James' change in behavior, so what about Sirius? SBOC, Marauder era. Mainly fluff, with some subtle humor. Better than it sounds. You won't be sorry if you read it! At least I hope so.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 79,017 - Reviews: 262 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 8/18/2006 - Published: 6/20/2004 - Sirius B.
Harry Potter & the Azkaban Movie Parody by waldorf88 reviews
A parody of the third Harry Potter movie and book, for all the disappointed fans of the third movie!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 9,737 - Reviews: 315 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 9/25/2005 - Published: 9/10/2004
Priori Incantatem by fellytone reviews
Can James Potter, Marauder and troublemaker extraordinaire, ever convince Lily Evans, Prefect and good girl, that they were meant to be? Now complete!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 64 - Words: 306,215 - Reviews: 4600 - Favs: 2,844 - Follows: 515 - Updated: 8/7/2005 - Published: 10/1/2003 - Lily Evans P., James P. - Complete
Wizarding Betrothal by pasmosa reviews
Lily's parents arranged her marriage to a wizard when she was born, and sealed the deal with a binding magical contract! Nobody counted on Lily choosing not to cooperate! Someone's heart will get broken. Will it be her own? COMPLETE
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 74,110 - Reviews: 1275 - Favs: 988 - Follows: 136 - Updated: 2/18/2005 - Published: 7/29/2004 - Lily Evans P., James P. - Complete
Of Cohorts and Competitors by le manchot du destin reviews
Just a little story about two people who hate eachother...and how they someday end up married with a kid...that's right, Lily Evans and James Potter, school days, what happened there?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 45,995 - Reviews: 162 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/25/2005 - Published: 10/13/2004 - James P., Lily Evans P.
Fred and George: A History by maraudette-kim reviews
Property of Fred and George Weasley WARNING: chapters ahead may contain some seriously funny stuff! NOT RECOMMENDED FOR CHILDREN, PREGNANT WOMEN, ELDERLY PEOPLE, AND ANY PERSON WITH A HEALTH PROBLEM. lol jks just R&R!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,696 - Reviews: 138 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 11/20/2004 - Published: 9/18/2004 - George W., Percy W.
Avada Kedavra by Prongs J. Potter reviews
This is a very strange and random parody that my friend and I made up late one night. Just so you know, it's sung like Hakuna Matata.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 678 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/28/2004 - Complete
The Awakening Power by sib-ff reviews
Complete! Challenges fill Harry’s 6th year: growing powers, Snape as defense teacher, new Potions teacher, a new crush on him, Voldemort, Ginny, Goblins? Lots of humor, drama, action and romance! H:G,R:Hr. Award winner!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 34 - Words: 250,118 - Reviews: 2469 - Favs: 2,822 - Follows: 554 - Updated: 10/14/2004 - Published: 1/29/2004 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Pensieve by Oy Angelina reviews
She's a Prefect, He's a Marauder; and falling in love might be the best thing that ever happened to either Lily or James. Set during their 6th Year with the rest of MWPP. RATED PRE-OotP - story content may not follow canon revealed in Book 5
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 39 - Words: 403,195 - Reviews: 1721 - Favs: 1,043 - Follows: 215 - Updated: 9/1/2004 - Published: 12/9/2002 - James P., Lily Evans P.
Something Akin to A Love Story by MelissaMarie reviews
Once upon a time, there was a boy who loved a girl. But the boy was a bit of a moron, and the girl came to hate him and his insufferable big head more than just about anyone. For awhile at least.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 14,951 - Reviews: 183 - Favs: 161 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 7/1/2004 - Published: 5/4/2004 - James P., Lily Evans P.
Home Alone by KEDme reviews
Summer after OotP, Petunia and Vernon go away for the weekend leaving Dudley in charge. How do Fred, George, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny fit into all this? Angst, Drama, Humor, Fluff, and Snogging! Fits with OotP Canon.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 87,578 - Reviews: 568 - Favs: 511 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 4/9/2004 - Published: 11/3/2003 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
After the End by Sugar Quill reviews
A post-Hogwarts story by Zsenya and Arabella
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 46 - Words: 632,204 - Reviews: 1473 - Favs: 1,358 - Follows: 139 - Updated: 6/20/2003 - Published: 5/12/2001
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Navy Ball reviews
It took Callen a few minutes to notice what was happening. Years of training had taught him to always keep a watchful eye on his teammates, even off-duty. It was this over-developed sixth-sense that sent a quiet alert to his brain. "We have a problem," Callen said to his partner. Sam's gaze shifted to Kensi and Deeks. He sighed. "Where's Hetty?"
NCIS: Los Angeles - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 28,216 - Reviews: 291 - Favs: 220 - Follows: 276 - Updated: 8/26/2013 - Published: 6/16/2013 - M. Deeks, Kensi B. - Complete
Berlin reviews
Tony and Ziva head to Berlin to apprehend Ilan Bodner. While there, they make a startling realization. Before any rules are broken, however, they need to ask the permission from the one person they trust (and fear) the most: Leroy Jethro Gibbs. TIVA, Spoiler: Written pre 10x21: Berlin
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,158 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 4/27/2013 - Published: 4/12/2013 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete
I'm Telling You Why reviews
Tony's dad is incredulous when he sees his son's apartment for the first time. Why does it appear that nobody lives there? Season 10 spoiler alert: You Better Watch Out. TIVA
NCIS - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,317 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 81 - Updated: 2/12/2013 - Published: 12/22/2012 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete
Accidental Witnesses reviews
Marauder era. A two-chapter fic, about Lily & James' 7th year. First kisses and difficult conversations, interrupted by those nearest and dearest. Second chapter, called "The Animagus Conversation"
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,502 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 12/14/2010 - Published: 2/28/2005 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
The Stipulation reviews
An undercover operation further complicates Tony and Ziva's tense relationship when they are asked to assist the L.A. division in catching a serial killer tearing through the city. TIVA.
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,466 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 11/9/2010 - Published: 10/21/2010 - Tony D., Ziva D.
Personal Demons reviews
Tension erupts at NCIS when Jeanne returns to D.C., pursued by an arms dealer searching for a naval weapon previously owned by her father. Tony struggles to maintain control and keep his developing relationship with Ziva a secret. TIVA, complete
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 33,282 - Reviews: 203 - Favs: 123 - Follows: 135 - Updated: 7/29/2010 - Published: 3/4/2010 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete
The Truth Shall Set You Free reviews
A week after Tony and Ziva's visit to Paris, questions arise about what happened the night of their hotel stay when Tony is implicated in a failed F.B.I. sting. Flashbacks to "Jetlag," the story is rated 'M' for a reason. This is my first NCIS story.
NCIS - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,588 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 8 - Published: 2/9/2010 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete
The Past Haunts You reviews
The war is over; The trio has come out relatively unscathed... or have they? There are secrets amongst the wreckage waiting to be uncovered and exposed. (Ch7 is a flashback into the MWPP days)
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 58,546 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 4/17/2005 - Published: 11/10/2004 - Harry P., Ginny W.