Author has written 2 stories for Percy Jackson and the Olympians.
Why did the hipster burn his tongue? he sipped his coffee before it was cool!
If you ever drink a bottle of vodka and decide a good idea would be to stand on an end table and sing Nicki Minaj... just don't.
Jesus could walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim on land.
Things to do in an elevator:
When there is only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder then pretend it wasn't you.
Put your desk in the elevator and when people walk in ask if they have an appointment.
Put a box in the corner and ask if anyone hears ticking.
When the doors close anounce it's okay, they open again.
Crack open your briefcase or purse, look inside and ask got enough air in there?
Stand motionless in the corner facing the wall and don't get off
When you hit the button pretend it shocks you, then smile and do it again.
Ask did you feel that?
Stare at one of the other pasengers then anounce in horror your one of them and back away slowly.
Wear a sock puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.