Author has written 17 stories for My Little Pony, Pokémon, X-Com, Halo, Left 4 Dead, Star Wars, Fallout, and Star Wars: The Clone Wars.
The main reason that I've deleted most of my non-updated stories is so I can rewrite them. I apologize to my faithful readers and I know that I will lose some of them because of this decision. All I hope is that you are able to forgive me.
Here is the list:
Let it be known that like most author's, I thrive upon your feedback! If a story is being commented on more than another, the one with more comments per update tends to be updated more.
Name: Anonymous, Anon, Rick, Crystal, Stephan, and Mark
Race: Homo Sapien Sapien
Gender: Male and Male
Sexual Orientation: Dafuq you want to know? Anyway;
Skype: mark_durnk. If that doesn't work, look up Bubba the Second. Picture is of various tings.
Tumblr: I have one now! ask-mark-durnkinscoff-mie.tumblr.com! Ask the cast of my stories anything!
Quote of the Century: "Never trust what you read online; it may be fabricated." -Abraham Lincoln
Me as a Pony;
Name: Timeithian/Red Dawn
Age: estimated at 7,819 years old, not confirmed
Sex: Stallion, but known to change gender to mess with others
Sub-Species: Alicorn, sometimes appears as either a Pegasus or an Unicorn
Occupation: Co-Ruler of Equestria, General in Equestrian Military
Cutie Mark: Distorted hourglass with an odd skull behind it
Background: Red Dawn, as he prefers to be called, found out his special talent the day before his father died. He's indirectly the reason as to why he died, due to a curse in the Royal Family that's gone unspoken for thousands of years. This is also the reason Dawn refuses to have children, instead wanting to use his limitless life to spread healing to ponies in need. Although the main forces of the Equestrian Military reside in Canterlot, he has made his base in Ponyville, choosing to lead from his house. When Nightmare Moon was banished to the moon a millennium ago, he disappeared off of the map until she returned. He spends a lot of time, quote, "Skipping across dimensions, so don't expect to always be able to find me."
Though I walk
Shoot first, shoot later, shoot some more, and then think about the consequences...and shoot those too.
Updating a little slower as of right now, due to the following raisins:
Honorable Quotes and Events:
Drill Sergeant: "How did you steal all our ammo, PVT?"
Me: "Cause I'm a ninja, Drill Sergeant."
It was totally worth scrubbing toilets for a week.
"It's ok, just tell your parents we opened a portal to hell." – My friend as he burns the fuck out of my yard with a huge bonfire.
"You think you're Marky Mark? Is this the fucking Bunch? Fix your headgear!" – Drill Sergeant to a guy with his Patrol Cap on sideways.
"What the hell is this? These are recyclable God damnit!" – Drill Sergeant as he sees two plastic bottles in the garbage.
"Fuck people and their money!" –My friend as he notices all the nice cars in town. (We lived in ghetto central)
"This is the part where you enjoy a nice cup of shut the fuck up." – Me to someone.
"Hey, let's go start Stephan's car on fire." – My friend to me as we sit around bored.
"STFU and eat the damn shit!" - Me when I was babysitting four years ago.
"I caught that rocket with my face LIKE A BOSS!" – Friend playing Halo: Reach.
"I love it when a bug flies in your ear and rapes your brain." – My friend.
"Let's go murder someone while we rape a chick as we burn their house down and do Meth." Me to a friend as we discuss what to do because we were bored.
"Just because you're a lazy sack of shit doesn't mean you can take up the entire couch. Move your fat ass over." – Me to Stephan.
If you are weird and you are proud of it, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever talked back to your TV because of what someone on the show said, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen, watching-waiting-wishing, 100-percent-Harry-Potter-obsessed, iluvdavidwright45, dianeandnumairareahotcouple,windsoftiti, Ilovethelittletacos...Ilovethemgood, i-have-issues-deal-with-it ,Sn1ck3rD00dl3, Annoyed Child, Ryu-chan the koorime,sqishy-muffin, AkatsukiFan, Shifter-youkai, ChOpStIcKsXOXO, RadicalEd57, Nigellica, Getting-up-for-the-let-down, UzumakiNasadi, Species Unknown, jak3combat
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile.
If you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all: -I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool! If you could read that put it in your profile!
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Alice001, HeartOfAgony, sorceress-of-faith, Ribbon-chan03, LaughsLikeGirl, Zakuro17, Getting-up-for-the-let-down, UzumakiNasadi, Species Unknown, Lightning Latias, jak3combat
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile
92 percent of American teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their butts off at the others.
If you talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: Danyan, Avatarwolf, Shifter-youkai ChOpstIcKsXOXO, RadicalEd57, Nigellica, Getting-up-for-the-let-down, UzumakiNasadi, Species Unknown, jak3combat
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile
If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.
If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...
If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.
If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever felt the undeniable urge to slam your head into something, weather it is another person or not copy this into your profile.
Love Vs. Sex
A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year.
She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger.
When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it.
However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her.
She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection.
Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her.
When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there.
Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep.
Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station.
She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story.
The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him.
She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before.
When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed.
The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her.
She asked if they would ask the man one question.
Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her.
When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her."
Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 percent of teenagers will not stand up for God?
Repost this as Love vs. Sex if you truly believe in God..
Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! Did you know that 98 percent of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 percent of the people that read this won’t repost it?
If you are looking for more of these, Copy and Paste this into your profile.
Admitting you are weird, means you are normal. Saying that your normal is odd. If you admit that your weird and are very proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
I am the girl who got kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
You know you live in 2008 when you...
1.) accidentally enter your password on a microwave.
2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years.
3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screenname or myspace.
4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV.
6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.
7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.
8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.
9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.
10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.
11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.
12) Copy and paste this into your profile if you fell for it and I know you did
98 of the internet population has a Myspace. If you're part of the 2 that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you get a kick out of explosions, copy and paste this to your profile! (BOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!)
Just because we eat animals for food doesn't mean we can cut them up for clothing! If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc. (or coats, handbags. copy this into your profile! Did you know that to get the fur, they club, drown, and anal eletrocute the poor animals. And why are they so cruel? Because they don't want to ruin the furs! Now copy this into your freakin' profile, dammit!
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, post this in your profile
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile. (and i never will)
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen, loop-de-loop-ride, wfea, PotterPhan21, Tansiana, Tigerlilystar, Sweet-Sunshyne, iBlametheNargles, Latias_Saphira, Species Unknown, jak3combat
If you think you are awesome, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have an unhealthy obsession with weapons, fire, sharp things, etc, copy and paste this into your profile
If you laughed at any of the above, copy and paste this into your profile
A large percentage of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you're one of the ones who does know and wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you love your ability to read, write, and own a library card more than you love school copy and past this into your profile.
I want child abuse to stop, and if you do, too, copy and paste this onto your profile.
98 percent of teens do or have tried pot. If you are part of the 2 percent who have not, copy and paste this into your profil
if you hate the Edward Cullen fangirls, copy and paste this into your profile PLEASE!!!!
If you see no point in the vampire novel, TWILIGHT, and all its sequels, copy and paste this into your profile and prove to the world that Twilight is just a load of over-advertised/loved crap.
if you agree that Romeo and Juliet is just a relationship between a thirteen year-old and a seventeen year-old that lasted three days, incorporated the deaths of six people, and is NOT a romance/tragedy story copy and paste this into your profile. (if i ruined it for you, trust me, you'll thank me later)
If you hate High School Musical and you wish that they would all just die then copy and paste this onto your profile. (well, maybe not die. that would be extreme, but i wish they would disappear.)
For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm labeled by OTHERS EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape. (MPD Goddammit!)
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so i MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.(partially indian)
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So i must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I MUST be an arsonist
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser. (mostly what i want)
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I LIKE LLAMAS, so I MUST be either Peruvian or an annoying freak.
I'm a STONER so i MUST be going in the wrong direction
I'm a VIRGIN so i MUST be prude (i'm not 18 yet!!!!)
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so i must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly... or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so i MUST be fat
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly. (or i just don't care :DD)
I'm a SKATER so i must do weed and steal stuff.
I'm a GIRL so I MUST love Barbie, wear pink and go out with the guy next door.
I'm a PUNK so i must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so i must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so i must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so i MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in a BAND, so i MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm labeled GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I LIKE ANIME, so I MUST be a yaoi fan.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive. (sort of, some things i am, others i'm not)
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I DON'T LIKE THE TWILIGHT SERIES so I MUST be a REJECT. (i don't don't like them, i *ing HATE them!)
I'm PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST be gay.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social. (this is true)
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I Must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak. (weak in body, not in mind!)
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I'm JAPANESE so I MUST love anime and eat sushi every day.
I'm DYSLEXIC so I must have one SPECIAL SKILL and be utterly rubbish at everything else.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST be JINGOISTIC and BAD-TEMPERED.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER. (and i am)
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST be GINGER, love HAGGIS, play the BAGPIPES and wear a KILT.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm BRITISH, so I MUST be either a chav or a stuck-up toff.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED (aren't we all?)
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast ( or parent's don't allow it)
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic b* (or i'm just a grammar Nazi on somethings)
I'm labeled GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have no clue.
I am QUIET and POLITE, so I MUST be a pushover.
I use GOOD GRAMMAR, so I MUST be a snob.
I prefer FANTASY and SCI-FI, so I MUST be out of touch with reality.
I love TO LEARN so I MUST be boring.
I'm WHITE, so I MUST be a racist.
I'm a GUY with LONG HAIR, so I MUST be a hippie/druggie.
I'm good with COMPUTERS, so I MUST be a nerd/geek. (depends)
I'm a GUY, so I MUST love sports.
I'm NOT RELIGIOUS so I MUST be treated like crap until I pray to your god.
I am a GIRL, so boys MUST be better than me at sports.
I am a PUSHOVER, so I MUST have controlling friends
I am a GIRL, so I MUST only be good at housework.
I am not EMO, so I MUST be uncool.
I am WHITE and I like to DANCE, so I MUST be lame
I don't act DEPRESSED, so I MUST be weird.
I am SKINNY, so I MUST be sensitive about my weight.
I am a CHRISTIAN/CATHOLIC/ANGLICAN/PROTESTANT, so I MUST go to church every Sunday.
I am a CHRISTIAN/CATHOLIC/ANGLICAN/PROTESTANT, so I MUST not do anything on Halloween.
I am POOR, so I MUST not have good hygiene.
I am a HOUSEWIFE, so I MUST have no self respect.
I consider myself 'NORMAL', so I MUST be boring.
I COPIED AND PASTED THIS INTO MY PROFILE, so I MUST be a plagiarist.