callmepagliacci
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Joined 05-24-12, id: 4020071, Profile Updated: 08-04-13
Author has written 6 stories for Twilight.

"Heard a joke once: Man goes into doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. Doctor says "Treatment is simple. Great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go and see him. That should pick you up." Man bursts into tears. Says "But, Doctor...I am Pagliacci." Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains." -- Rorschach, Watchmen, by Alan Moore, Dave Gibbons, John Higgins


"There is not less wit nor less invention in applying rightly a thought one finds in a book, than in being the first author of that thought." -Pierre Bayle, philosopher and writer (1647-1706)


Find me on Twitter: @CallMePagliacci

Check out my story blog, chekovsgunblog.blogspot.com, for a bonus material, references, and yummy tuxporn.

A very special thank-you to TwistedInMasen for making my ABFCG banner!


And here's the gorgeous Mise-en-Place banner, made by Beffers87!

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Gothic by author-self-insert reviews
10 yrs ago, Edward was accused of murder & Bella was his alibi. Today, the murder is still unsolved & Bella hates Edward. Can a penchant for gothic mystery, a hearty dose of lingering hostility & a desire for justice really right old wrongs? Inspired by old newspaper serials. AH HEA
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Mystery - Chapters: 29 - Words: 164,011 - Reviews: 2688 - Favs: 746 - Follows: 881 - Updated: 9/17 - Published: 10/3/2014 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Wisp by Cris reviews
Edward wins more than he bargained for at what was supposed to be a friendly poker game. AH. Ysar made me my banner!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 63 - Words: 325,303 - Reviews: 14445 - Favs: 6,265 - Follows: 6,716 - Updated: 6/16 - Published: 4/22/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
There is a Light by belladonnacullen reviews
This was 1987; before the Internet, before Twitter, before Facebook – this was back when it was still possible for people not to know about things: big things - like bands, and little things - like G-spots. AH, ExB, with some other parings along the way.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 23 - Words: 142,142 - Reviews: 5389 - Favs: 4,192 - Follows: 2,598 - Updated: 12/19/2018 - Published: 5/23/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Chop and Change by Krazyk85 reviews
Caught trying to steal his car, a runaway, Bella, meets Edward. A man with his own vices and long rap sheet. Taking her under his wing and teaching her the way to truly boost cars, they embark on a journey of crime fitting of Bonnie and Clyde. ExB, Lemons, Violence, Guns, and Fun. HEA. BPOV. Watch Trailer on youtube: www. youtube. com /watch? v S5mvlCUXDf8& feature youtube gdata
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Crime - Chapters: 2 - Words: 568 - Reviews: 4504 - Favs: 3,068 - Follows: 2,387 - Updated: 5/2/2018 - Published: 7/6/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Blizzard by sheviking reviews
Bella is walking home during a blizzard and stumbles on a homeless man on the ground. Despite her better judgment she decides to save him from the cold, and the night turns into something she never expected. ON TEMP. HIATUS.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 28 - Words: 168,412 - Reviews: 9624 - Favs: 8,054 - Follows: 8,094 - Updated: 3/13/2018 - Published: 3/23/2010 - Bella, Edward
Ballad of the Spinster and the Outlaw by Alby Mangroves reviews
"Sometimes, at night, he'd walk in his meadow and look to the sky, hoping she was seeing the same full moon, the same brilliant stars." This is a story of second chances and intrepid hearts.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Western - Chapters: 19 - Words: 29,091 - Reviews: 1176 - Favs: 741 - Follows: 896 - Updated: 12/28/2016 - Published: 4/2/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
OPERATION: Break the Dawn by katinki reviews
An experimental weapon, one of the most lethal chemicals ever created, has been stolen. Its final destination is unknown, but there's no doubt the powerful faction behind the theft is intent on one thing: War. But they didn't count on a fight. A team of Marines, led by Capt. Edward Cullen and accompanied by Dr. Isabella Swan, isn't about to let the world go up in flames. AH.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 17 - Words: 124,848 - Reviews: 3174 - Favs: 2,065 - Follows: 2,847 - Updated: 1/2/2016 - Published: 8/6/2012 - Edward, Bella
String Theory by theladyingrey42 reviews
"Eleven dimensions. Infinite parallel realities. And in all of them, I love her." Muppets, math, and physicists falling in love. Fluff and eventual lemons. ExB, AH.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 55 - Words: 81,043 - Reviews: 8809 - Favs: 4,293 - Follows: 2,342 - Updated: 11/3/2015 - Published: 11/27/2011 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Late Night Encounters by kyla713 reviews
Lonely ER doc Edward Cullen goes online one night in curiosity, never expecting to find what was awaiting him. AH/possibly some OOC.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 147,881 - Reviews: 9638 - Favs: 9,683 - Follows: 6,515 - Updated: 8/6/2015 - Published: 7/27/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
In The Waves by Jadalulu reviews
A little something about a girl in love with the edge of her world. Began as June 2012 Fictionista Workshop Witfit, but Jada failed that nicely so now it's not. ExB
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 33,666 - Reviews: 1089 - Favs: 887 - Follows: 1,285 - Updated: 7/23/2015 - Published: 6/4/2012 - Bella, Edward
Follow The Sun by MissWinkles reviews
Sometimes you have to stop thinking with your head and listen to your heart, follow which way the wind blows and dream with abandon. Because tomorrow is a brand new day, and who knows what it will bring. E/B. Fluffy as fuck, with some sweet salty love.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 37 - Words: 100,155 - Reviews: 2322 - Favs: 1,780 - Follows: 1,692 - Updated: 11/7/2014 - Published: 9/13/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Stolen by Rochelle Allison reviews
He stole her heart, and then he stole her father's fortune. Love and forgiveness are nice concepts, but highly improbable. Right? Drama, romance, action, and a heavy sprinkling of the good stuff.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 109,385 - Reviews: 5221 - Favs: 2,493 - Follows: 2,352 - Updated: 2/11/2014 - Published: 3/15/2013 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Agreement by Gemgirl65 reviews
A virgin. An escort. A contract signed. But falling in love wasn't part of the agreement... AH, E&B
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 50 - Words: 248,245 - Reviews: 6744 - Favs: 3,568 - Follows: 4,370 - Updated: 12/15/2013 - Published: 3/21/2012 - Bella, Edward
MISSION: Ghost, An OPERATION: Break the Dawn Extra by katinki reviews
COMPLETE O/S. An OPERATION: Break the Dawn "Extra". In chapter 7, there are references to an operation that took place in 2007, 6 years prior to the events in the main story. This is where our team first comes together. It also shapes a lot of who Captain Cullen is today. MISSION: Ghost is a brief glimpse into Edward's and the team's back story. Read at your own discretion. AH.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,847 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 108 - Follows: 85 - Published: 11/9/2013 - Edward - Complete
Tropic of Virgo by In.a.blue.bathrobe reviews
He's a young but jaded musician writing lyrics for his band, and she's a naive, frustrated poet looking to break out of her shell; their words collide online. What happens when they meet in high school, unaware of their literary connection?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 37 - Words: 150,577 - Reviews: 20526 - Favs: 13,987 - Follows: 5,694 - Updated: 9/9/2013 - Published: 3/4/2009 - Complete
Confessions After Dark by 2DrunkUnicorns reviews
"Everyone has something they'd like to confess…" Every Friday night, he calls. And every time he calls, I listen. A story about what happens when fantasy blends into reality – when the secrets we share are just as important as the secrets we keep.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 31 - Words: 23,240 - Reviews: 2819 - Favs: 1,609 - Follows: 1,565 - Updated: 9/4/2013 - Published: 8/20/2013 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Beneath this Sky by Bedelia reviews
Nineteen years ago, time unraveled. In a changed world, Bella fights to save a man from the past and a girl with no future. AU.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 100,653 - Reviews: 1390 - Favs: 989 - Follows: 929 - Updated: 6/18/2013 - Published: 8/5/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Terroir by thimbles reviews
Isabella Swan uproots her life on a whim, moving halfway around the world in search of something more. Perhaps she will find what she's looking for in the neatly laid rows of Cullen Family Wines' Hunter Valley vineyard. Sometimes, it is the grafted vine that produces the more vigorous growth.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 70,413 - Reviews: 1808 - Favs: 1,734 - Follows: 1,334 - Updated: 6/11/2013 - Published: 3/4/2013 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Delphian City by Boom-Boom Jones reviews
There are dark secrets in Delphian City. Edward Cullen is one of them. AH/AU OOC Supernatural/Fantasy/Sci-Fi minus the vamps.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 43,935 - Reviews: 807 - Favs: 465 - Follows: 762 - Updated: 4/27/2013 - Published: 4/15/2012 - Bella, Edward
Words with Strangers by Nolebucgrl reviews
EPOV Companion Piece to Words with Friends. Movie star Edward Cullen is done with women and focused on his career. A stranger reaches out to him via Words with Friends. Will her words change his mind?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 52 - Words: 306,499 - Reviews: 13611 - Favs: 5,055 - Follows: 3,527 - Updated: 4/20/2013 - Published: 7/13/2011 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Words with Friends by Nolebucgrl reviews
Bella Swan has a major crush on a major star, Edward Cullen. They have an obsession with the same game. Can they connect through Words with Friends and become more than that? Rated M.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 62 - Words: 353,055 - Reviews: 19674 - Favs: 9,670 - Follows: 6,813 - Updated: 4/20/2013 - Published: 4/16/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Inside Man by ooza reviews
With his parole fast approaching, inmate Edward Masen is looking for a friend. College student Bella Swan stumbles across his profile on a prison pen-pal website. Their friendship is formed over written words, but will it last once he rejoins her world?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 53 - Words: 89,972 - Reviews: 12826 - Favs: 7,014 - Follows: 6,114 - Updated: 2/23/2013 - Published: 6/1/2011 - Edward, Bella - Complete
To The Light by DTCPS reviews
A man of science, Dr. [Edward] Masen has devoted his career to studying bioluminescent marine creatures. But a moonlit dive and one bad judgement call put him at terrible risk. What will he learn from his mistake? And more importantly, will he finally understand that sometimes you can believe your eyes? "Your kind are dreamers like mine. But at present, we are both awake."
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,159 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 44 - Published: 2/3/2013 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Figmentum by thimbles reviews
Figmentum: 1. figment, fiction, invention, unreality; 2. thing formed, devised; 3. image. She coaxes him into existence with every word she writes. What will Bella do when she finds herself falling in love with the main character in her latest novel?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 18 - Words: 106,643 - Reviews: 1088 - Favs: 550 - Follows: 512 - Updated: 1/14/2013 - Published: 9/28/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Wiegenlied by Cris reviews
Winner of Public Lovin' Fanfiction Contest. Bella's cactus dies and she needs a new friend. Vamp. *no cacti were harmed in the writing of this fic* Banner by FortheLongestDay.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 14,282 - Reviews: 214 - Favs: 335 - Follows: 196 - Updated: 12/31/2012 - Published: 11/10/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Purple Banana Hammock by TheFicChick reviews
Like most women, I always found Speedos to be equal parts hilarious and horrifying. That all changed the day I saw Edward Cullen wearing one.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 52,150 - Reviews: 1187 - Favs: 3,164 - Follows: 1,126 - Updated: 11/27/2012 - Published: 8/17/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Laid Bare by Brits23 reviews
Desperate to taste-unable to deny. A defective vampire-a deceptive human girl. Monster and man discovers primal urges he never knew existed. Can it ever be enough? To drink her is completion, to touch her is , ExB OOC,Canon pairs
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 30 - Words: 269,083 - Reviews: 4675 - Favs: 3,370 - Follows: 2,685 - Updated: 11/27/2012 - Published: 11/28/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Rise by Rochelle Allison reviews
Bella is a bad boy's girl, living a life she no longer wants. She's trapped, until one of the things that keeps her confined - her bodyguard - becomes the very thing that could set her free.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 57,852 - Reviews: 5231 - Favs: 3,274 - Follows: 1,680 - Updated: 11/13/2012 - Published: 10/15/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Letters to Corporal Masen by solostintwilight reviews
Writing to offer a bit of home to a soldier overseas, she discovers words can bind a friendship. Lonely in war torn Europe, he finds hope in letters from a stranger. What happens when the war is over?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 37 - Words: 89,350 - Reviews: 6785 - Favs: 3,024 - Follows: 1,750 - Updated: 11/11/2012 - Published: 8/26/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Defrosting Edward by Aleeab4u reviews
Bella's been trying to warm Edward up in more ways than one. With a little help from Alice, a broken truck and a few burned fingers, she just might have found his defrost button. Rated M with canon characters, based on "practice makes perfect." E/B AU
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 162,326 - Reviews: 1586 - Favs: 1,564 - Follows: 1,187 - Updated: 10/9/2012 - Published: 3/6/2009 - Edward, Bella
High Fidelity by IReen Weiss reviews
Damaged Edward, damaged Bella. Two sides of the same scarred coin. When one side is up, the other is down. Language and lots of it. Lemons eventually. It's a slow burn, slow and painful. Mature. Lots of random pop culture references. AH, AU, ExB.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 22 - Words: 205,466 - Reviews: 5820 - Favs: 4,306 - Follows: 3,739 - Updated: 10/3/2012 - Published: 1/24/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Cake by wildflowers82 reviews
Edward moved away and Bella's now happy with his best friend, Jasper. A visit home stirs up old desires and new temptations. Very mature. ExBxJ One-shot
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,596 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 225 - Follows: 81 - Published: 9/14/2012 - Complete
Wisp POV Outtake by Cris reviews
This is an outtake from my story Wisp, in her POV. Set around chapter 24-ish. Dedicated to Ooza and luvrofink.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,810 - Reviews: 185 - Favs: 202 - Follows: 200 - Published: 9/1/2012 - Bella, Edward
Anatomy of a Human by Amethyst Jackson reviews
Companion to Only Human. Edward's young life is irreversibly altered when a mysterious girl in strange clothing stumbles into his world. Now complete.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 57,142 - Reviews: 2059 - Favs: 2,293 - Follows: 1,702 - Updated: 8/31/2012 - Published: 4/7/2010 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Breaking Trinity by VvDeadRosesvV reviews
AH/AU ExB Lemon. Mid-Semester, Senior Year. Bella is escaping Arizona and starting over in Washington. An unexpected hook-up at a party in Port Angeles turns into obsession. What happens when desire becomes too much to control? Rated S for Snarling.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 32 - Words: 184,871 - Reviews: 6726 - Favs: 5,170 - Follows: 4,940 - Updated: 8/23/2012 - Published: 9/15/2009 - Edward, Bella
En Pointe by GingerWombatkat reviews
For Beyond the Pale: The treaty left Bella his slave, but serving a vampire who demands perfection is a challenge. BxE VERY DARKWARD, Mature content, read at your own risk.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 56,226 - Reviews: 1583 - Favs: 1,916 - Follows: 2,403 - Updated: 8/22/2012 - Published: 9/7/2010 - Bella, Edward
The Best Thing I Ever Did by WhatsMyNomDePlume reviews
Mini-sequel to The Best I Ever Had for FGB.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 32,230 - Reviews: 2004 - Favs: 3,513 - Follows: 2,480 - Updated: 7/21/2012 - Published: 6/14/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Here, In My Room by nightcaller reviews
Bella is Jake's girl. Edward intends to change that. Sweaty back seats, stolen glances that cross the line and unrequited love that holds back no more. Edward & Bella AH.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 15 - Words: 31,239 - Reviews: 1016 - Favs: 752 - Follows: 523 - Updated: 7/13/2012 - Published: 12/18/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Animate Me by abstract way reviews
Professional animator Edward worships cartoon exec Bella from afar by day and draws her in his comic book late at night. When this Daffy Duck-loving geek comes face to face with his dream girl, will his fantasy world come to life? ...Note:The primary story of Animate Me was pulled and published. Thanks for 2 great years on fan fic.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 10,251 - Reviews: 11455 - Favs: 4,443 - Follows: 3,641 - Updated: 7/13/2012 - Published: 5/14/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Adult Book Store by cosmogirl7481 reviews
Bella drove past every day…curious, frustrated, repressed and longing. Secretly needing something, but too afraid to ask. Until one day, she wasn't.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 13,094 - Reviews: 2524 - Favs: 2,420 - Follows: 1,405 - Updated: 6/27/2012 - Published: 6/26/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Best I Ever Had by WhatsMyNomDePlume reviews
Sex between friends complicates everything. Bella knows this. But she has no idea how much more Edward is going to complicate things.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 64,919 - Reviews: 7637 - Favs: 11,525 - Follows: 6,105 - Updated: 6/25/2012 - Published: 2/17/2011 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Failure to Thrive by Julesnerd reviews
Bella is sexually unfulfilled after four horrible encounters. She meets Edward Masen, and things begin to change. Edward is sexally insatiable and Bella has been told she's frigid. B/E/AH/AU/OOC. Rated M for a reason! Lemons to follow. Humor/Sarcasm
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 27 - Words: 195,999 - Reviews: 2488 - Favs: 3,801 - Follows: 2,672 - Updated: 6/10/2012 - Published: 6/26/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Bonne Foi by Amethyst Jackson reviews
AU. Edward Masen was changed in 1918 and abandoned by his sire. He feeds on human blood, unaware of any other way…until he stumbles across college freshman Bella Swan for a night that will change everything.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 41 - Words: 169,901 - Reviews: 14835 - Favs: 11,692 - Follows: 8,121 - Updated: 5/8/2012 - Published: 11/6/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Watch Me by Rochelle Allison reviews
Bella's obsession with wristwatches & her preoccupation with the Sky God next door coalesce in a serendipitous way. Birthday onehsot for Michelle.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,332 - Reviews: 282 - Favs: 848 - Follows: 250 - Published: 2/27/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Firefly in Summer by primarycolors reviews
Edward finds himself back in the little beach town of his childhood when he inherits the local bar from his uncle. The elusive, pretty girl next door has killer legs, a sketchbook and secrets that are slowly eating her alive.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 47 - Words: 188,377 - Reviews: 9942 - Favs: 7,272 - Follows: 4,530 - Updated: 2/19/2012 - Published: 1/20/2011 - Edward, Bella - Complete
A Love not meant for this World by sheviking reviews
Pompeii, 79 AD: In the midst of disaster can Bellona, a Roman noblewoman, save her gladiator? Or will the two lovers be forced to spend eternity apart? Age of Edward 2012 1st place winner in Literotica category.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,316 - Reviews: 285 - Favs: 677 - Follows: 196 - Updated: 2/17/2012 - Published: 2/9/2012 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Contextually Speaking by cosmogirl7481 reviews
Bella spends her days surrounded by books and her nights immersed in them. Reading but not living. Imagining but not experiencing. One night changes everything. A story about wrong numbers and a stranger with all the right words.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 15,797 - Reviews: 3188 - Favs: 2,401 - Follows: 1,110 - Published: 2/8/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Red Eye by luluwolfkill reviews
It's important for any private investigator to maintain a good relationship with local law enforcement and it's representatives. Therefore, I am always cooperative and polite with Chief Swan. Also, I try not to drink his daughter Bella's blood. Complete.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 37 - Words: 90,545 - Reviews: 4005 - Favs: 2,225 - Follows: 1,391 - Updated: 12/23/2011 - Published: 11/22/2010 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Art After 5 by sleepyvalentina reviews
Bella Swan had life figured out until she met sixteen-year-old Edward Cullen. A few months and an intense emotional connection later, she finds herself on a journey toward self acceptance while questioning everything she'd previously accepted as true.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 55 - Words: 130,382 - Reviews: 12209 - Favs: 5,480 - Follows: 3,222 - Updated: 11/5/2011 - Published: 4/29/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Ride by kris salvador reviews
Bella wanted to fulfill a fantasy - to be groped inside a crowded train. She gets her wish and more, when a sex-starved ex-convict decides she's fair game. ALLHUMAN. Mature but with plot.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 19 - Words: 67,524 - Reviews: 4610 - Favs: 8,335 - Follows: 4,506 - Updated: 8/6/2011 - Published: 8/19/2010 - Edward, Bella - Complete
A Matter of Life and Death by WhatsMyNomDePlume reviews
Forget being scared to death, Bella Swan isn't even scared of death, something that both greatly annoys and-even if he won't admit it-entices Edward Cullen. If only she weren't trying to destroy him. Collab w/ Derdriu oFaolain for FGB.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 27,390 - Reviews: 1263 - Favs: 1,181 - Follows: 601 - Updated: 7/22/2011 - Published: 6/15/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
My Beauty by sheviking reviews
Companion piece to My Viking. Chapter one from Edvard's POV.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 15,588 - Reviews: 705 - Favs: 1,236 - Follows: 1,247 - Updated: 5/24/2011 - Published: 5/11/2011 - Edward, Bella
Some Little Girls by sleepyvalentina reviews
Happily married and expecting her first child, Bella has everything she's always wanted. So why is she so scared? History doesn't have to repeat itself. Final installment in the Art After 5 universe.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 22,715 - Reviews: 2140 - Favs: 1,254 - Follows: 1,107 - Updated: 5/18/2011 - Published: 1/21/2010 - Complete
Getting Warmer by eiluned price reviews
After their honeymoon on Isle Esme, Bella gets to spend more time being human with Edward as they travel cross-country to New Hampshire and beyond, and learn about art, love and temperature differentials. AU. BxE. Newlyweds being newlyweds, so lemons.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 17 - Words: 165,751 - Reviews: 784 - Favs: 1,271 - Follows: 726 - Updated: 5/15/2011 - Published: 11/8/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Midnight Carnival by Cris reviews
AU vampire twoshot. Edward finds himself trapped, caged like an animal by the proprietors of the Midnight Carnival. They're starving him and he needs to find a way out. A mysterious, quiet girl, also kept captive, may just hold the key to his salvation.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 40,813 - Reviews: 186 - Favs: 472 - Follows: 160 - Updated: 4/6/2011 - Published: 3/17/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Five Nights by theladyingrey42 reviews
She thinks that I'm rejecting her. I know I'm still rejecting myself. - Five nights that could have happened in Eclipse. You know, if you forget that whole abstinence thing. AU / ExB / EPOV.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,060 - Reviews: 229 - Favs: 588 - Follows: 148 - Published: 4/5/2011 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Love in My Box by cosmoandmarvar reviews
Bella's an intellectual free spirit and Edward is a reserved, slightly geeky med student. They have a brief, but intense encounter on Sp Brk in Miami. Can they find true love through emails? There will be lemons and laughs. Look who's writing this!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 147,894 - Reviews: 8933 - Favs: 5,915 - Follows: 3,941 - Updated: 1/29/2011 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Tutor by ItzMegan73 reviews
New student Bella Swan needs to break out of her shy exterior and her guidance counselor has the answer: tutoring. And Bella is too new to know she shouldn’t want to tutor Edward Cullen.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 35 - Words: 162,443 - Reviews: 6997 - Favs: 10,720 - Follows: 3,299 - Updated: 12/25/2010 - Published: 4/18/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Wicked Angel by DevilishPleasures reviews
I am Edward Cullen and I have a deadly secret: I am a hit man. My new target: Isabella Newton. With the help of my friends, we plan the crime of the century. What the hell am I going to do when she becomes more than my target and becomes my life...?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 131,618 - Reviews: 3387 - Favs: 2,335 - Follows: 1,438 - Updated: 12/21/2010 - Published: 1/1/2010 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Counterpoint by sleepyvalentina reviews
Socially isolated and intellectually brilliant, sixteen-year-old Edward Cullen has never found a person outside of his family with whom he could connect, until a chance encounter changed everything. Part of the Art After 5 universe.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 54 - Words: 164,956 - Reviews: 9856 - Favs: 3,660 - Follows: 2,302 - Updated: 11/4/2010 - Published: 6/15/2009 - Complete
I Don't Believe in Vampires by lazykate reviews
"It was always you..." During a chance return to Forks, Bella Swan runs into her high school crush, only to discover that things were never as they appeared. What has Edward been waiting for all this time? A very-canon twist on Twilight, AU, ExB.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 215,322 - Reviews: 2324 - Favs: 2,800 - Follows: 1,361 - Updated: 9/19/2010 - Published: 10/23/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Blessing and the Curse by The Black Arrow reviews
By pretending she is falling for Edward, Bella is fulfilling Esme's dying wish. But sexy, possessive Edward can read her mind. Will she ever get into his? Can Bella forget the pain of her teenage years, and can she resist his relentless seduction? AH.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 140,448 - Reviews: 14510 - Favs: 16,755 - Follows: 8,705 - Updated: 9/10/2010 - Published: 5/31/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Port Angeles Players by WriteOnTime reviews
New in the town of Forks and eager to please her boss at the university, Bella auditions for a local production of Shakespeare's "Much Ado About Nothing". Her co-star is a handsome but confusing local doctor. Curtains-up on love. AH canon pairings.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 28 - Words: 170,459 - Reviews: 4614 - Favs: 4,085 - Follows: 1,638 - Updated: 8/29/2010 - Published: 3/11/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
TPAP Extra 2 Now Go We In Content by WriteOnTime reviews
This is the second and final extra bit for "The Port Angeles Players", made possible by a generous donation from the fabulous AccioBourbon.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,144 - Reviews: 118 - Favs: 173 - Follows: 58 - Published: 8/29/2010 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Midnight Desire by Twilightzoner reviews
An All Human parody of Midnight Sun. AH, AU and consequently OOC. No blood lust - just uncontrollable human lust. Smut filled fun . . .
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 89,654 - Reviews: 5418 - Favs: 7,206 - Follows: 3,442 - Updated: 7/1/2010 - Published: 7/13/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Art After 5 & Counterpoint Extras by sleepyvalentina reviews
Random moments from the Art After 5 universe. Deleted scenes and oneshots written for the Fandom Gives Back auction.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 16,186 - Reviews: 493 - Favs: 283 - Follows: 250 - Updated: 6/25/2010 - Published: 9/13/2009 - Complete
The Screamers by KiyaRaven reviews
Street kid. Rockstar. Worlds apart and yet so similar. Sometimes fate throws people together for a reason, and sometimes two people that rub each other the wrong way make the best sparks. All Human **WARNING: MOSTLY HUMOR BUT ALSO CONTAINS ANGST & DARK THEMES**
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 39 - Words: 358,773 - Reviews: 12650 - Favs: 7,440 - Follows: 3,564 - Updated: 6/2/2010 - Published: 5/23/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Only Human by Amethyst Jackson reviews
Complete. A wish sends Bella back in time to Chicago, 1918, and to a human Edward. This story is baby-free.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 28 - Words: 60,635 - Reviews: 6056 - Favs: 10,445 - Follows: 2,751 - Updated: 4/7/2010 - Published: 6/1/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The List by LauraACullen reviews
Four weeks before her wedding to Edward, Bella is frustrated. She knows there's little-to-no chance of getting him to bend his rules and boundaries now, but there's no harm in fantasizing about what could happen later. So she begins compiling a list...
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 28 - Words: 195,361 - Reviews: 2935 - Favs: 5,748 - Follows: 2,079 - Updated: 3/18/2010 - Published: 3/19/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
So Be It by SophiaAnne reviews
Happy Harry is here again, live and streaming right into where you live. Are you ready for me?” Will Bella Swan find out who's behind the sexy voice that has her all hot and bothered? BxE - AU/AH, OOC, Lemons and Language. Now revised and expanded.
Crossover - Pump Up The Volume & Twilight - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 21,484 - Reviews: 551 - Favs: 1,004 - Follows: 432 - Updated: 3/3/2010 - Published: 2/5/2009 - Bella - Complete
Sleeper in a Clone Suit by annanabanana reviews
...His eyes seemed to hold secrets, and I silently wished his hair were a true reflection of him. Beautiful, surreal, barely-tamed and begging to be released." AH, AU ExB Entry for the Tattward & Inkella contest. rated M for bad words and lemony goodness
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 18,195 - Reviews: 283 - Favs: 525 - Follows: 428 - Updated: 1/15/2010 - Published: 7/29/2009 - Bella, Edward
Virtual Intimacy by theladyingrey42 reviews
Bella is too shy to approach the pierced, tatted boy at the back of the lecture hall. But when she begins chatting with a classmate with an unusual screen-name, she lets a bolder side of her personality through. Lemon-shot Christmas present for antiaol.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,704 - Reviews: 565 - Favs: 2,053 - Follows: 489 - Published: 12/27/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Blood Lines by windchymes reviews
With just weeks to go before the wedding, Edward reveals a secret from his human life which leaves Bella shocked and wondering just how well she knows the man she is about to marry. This is very much an Edward and Bella love story. S Meyer owns all.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 264,462 - Reviews: 1686 - Favs: 2,830 - Follows: 828 - Updated: 12/20/2009 - Published: 5/24/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Ithaca is Gorges by giselle-lx reviews
New Moon from Carlisle's and Edward's POV: After the Cullens leave Bella and move to Ithaca, NY, Carlisle fights to keep his family together as Edward's pain threatens to tear them apart. Canon.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 19 - Words: 120,784 - Reviews: 2475 - Favs: 2,114 - Follows: 808 - Updated: 12/7/2009 - Published: 4/12/2009 - Carlisle - Complete
TPAP Extra 1 Will You, Nil You by WriteOnTime reviews
An extra bit from The Port Angeles Players, created especially for mujisan as part of the Support Stacie Author's Auction. The Players return to the stage for "The Taming of The Shrew".
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,062 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 170 - Follows: 97 - Published: 11/2/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Bella Swan: Kidnapper by Kambria Rain reviews
Um. Hi. I don’t really know how to say this, but I have your kids with me, and I was thinking maybe you would like them back. So yeah… call me.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 74,736 - Reviews: 9188 - Favs: 16,608 - Follows: 3,622 - Updated: 6/27/2009 - Published: 5/15/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Edward's Fantasy by LauraACullen reviews
The night before his wedding, Edward tries to make the time pass more quickly until he can see Bella again. Get a glimpse inside one of Edward's fantasies in this one-shot, an outtake from "The List". For mature readers, only.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,440 - Reviews: 107 - Favs: 334 - Follows: 76 - Published: 6/8/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Red Line by WinndSinger reviews
Edward is an exotic male dancer. Bella is a college student studying psychology and needs a subject to do her thesis on. Bella pays Edward to belong to her for 2 weeks so she can study him. Things soon get very interesting between them.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 40 - Words: 351,671 - Reviews: 19647 - Favs: 12,772 - Follows: 5,810 - Updated: 5/1/2009 - Published: 1/26/2009 - Edward, Bella
Testing the Waters by booboo.kitty2.0 reviews
After talking with Carlisle, and with some insight from Alice, Edward thinks he and Bella should test the waters of their physical relationship before jumping in, head first, on their wedding night.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,880 - Reviews: 101 - Favs: 383 - Follows: 78 - Published: 2/4/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Save You by bella c'ella luna reviews
Edward left Bella in New Moon and she lived the normal, vampire-free life that he always wanted for her. Now Bella's almost ninety and Edward is back in Forks for a final goodbye. This is a one-shot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,520 - Reviews: 538 - Favs: 551 - Follows: 118 - Published: 1/12/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
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Everything Is, Nothing Is reviews
She comes here one night a week, the darkest of circles under her eyes, and allows herself to be attached to all those wires and tubes and needles.  She hates needles, hates the attention of all the techs.  But she comes anyway, because Bella Swan can't dream on her own.  With my machine, I can make her dream. It's the only way I can make her see me at all.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 8 - Words: 4,471 - Reviews: 167 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 186 - Updated: 1/4/2015 - Published: 12/31/2013 - Bella, Edward
A Bullet from Chekhov's Gun reviews
"Charming" was the first deep cover Edward Cullen ever affected, years before he became a spy. Bella Swan is an American girl at Oxford with skills MI6 wants. "Befriending" Bella Swan will be his most challenging mission yet.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 22 - Words: 50,169 - Reviews: 1352 - Favs: 1,041 - Follows: 1,765 - Updated: 7/22/2014 - Published: 9/12/2012 - Edward, Bella
Mise-en-Place reviews
I recreated his mother's recipes when he was homesick. I made meal plans when he had to gain or lose weight for a role. And when he wanted chocolate-covered strawberries and champagne for another woman he was bringing home, I made them with all the love in my heart—the love he'd never see. So I showed him with my food.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 29,170 - Reviews: 1608 - Favs: 1,795 - Follows: 1,795 - Updated: 8/1/2013 - Published: 4/19/2013 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Get Cullen reviews
Edward Masen is a bad man. He is without remorse. They took his wife. Now someone has to die. Written for the Mine to Mark Contest 2013. Winner: Honorable Mention, Public Vote.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,471 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 32 - Published: 1/17/2013 - Edward - Complete
A Bullet from Chekhov's Gun: A Whisper Against the Powder reviews
Agent Cullen is on a mission in Alaska, and dark thoughts come unbidden. An ABFCG side-shot, just for Cris' birthday. NOTE: This chapter takes place between Chapters 20 and 21 of the main story.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,024 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 28 - Published: 11/19/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Eyes You Can't Ignore reviews
"And now, for my next trick, I will need a volunteer from the audience." My entry for the Public Lovin' Fanfiction Contest, 2012. Inspired by The Tea Party's "Psychopomp." M. AH. ExB.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,145 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 67 - Published: 11/16/2012 - Edward, Bella - Complete