DarkAngelVengeance
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Joined 05-30-12, id: 4030013, Profile Updated: 08-24-12
Author has written 6 stories for Harry Potter.

I want to say once, I HATE flame, I don't tolerate them. If people don't like something they shouldn't bother with it. The part I hate most is that they don't even have profiles so I can set them straight. flames are my pet peeve and with my low self esteem it's worse than just words. I get told I'm a loser because of my choice of music or movie. I'm called lazy when I just want to relax for a minute. Just take a minute to think about others before you say something online because you don't know them.

I am the boy who never finished high school, because I got called a fag everyday
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had.
I wish they could adopt me.
I am not one of the lucky ones.
I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school.
It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the Realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised.
The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the woman who died when the EMT s stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn't have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. I am the person ashamed to tell my own friends I'm a lesbian, because they constantly make fun of them.
I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men wanted to "teach me a lesson"

--IF YOU BELIEVE THAT HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG... COPY AND POST THIS TO YOUR PROFILE--

Copy & Pastes:

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason put this on your profile.

If you love random things, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are reading this, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you can not imagine what you did before you knew about Fanfiction even if it was less than 3 months ago, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have taken to wearing a cape around the house, copy and paste this into your profile. (Yes...I do...it is very strange...when my dad asks about it my excuse is that it is warm...)

If you really like writing these things and don't know why but don't plan to stop soon, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate school, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have violent thoughts, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are a psycho, copy this into your profile.

If you are a very scary person, copy this into your profile.

If Hannah Montana and Jonas Brothers must die, copy this into your profile.

If you can read/speak more than one language (not necessarily fluently), copy this into your profile. (emphasis on not fluently)

If you're weird, copy this into your profile

Truth

This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.


Sarah

My name is Sarah
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can't speak at all
I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long
When I awake I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home.
When my mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight
Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.
I hear him curse
My name he calls
I press myself
Against the wall.
I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm starting to cry.
He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.
He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.
He's already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate.
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor.
My name is Sarah
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy,
Murdered me.

Gay marriage:

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans... --

Re-post this if you believe in legalizing gay marriage

So true! Boys are idiots. (except gay guys they make best friends)

Almost all boys are idiots, except for gay guys, they make the best friends!

Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school, he told his friends that it was cool , and when he pulled the trigger back

It shot with a great crack! Mummy I was a good girl, I did what I was told, I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold

But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye, I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry

When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another, and all because he got the gun from his older brother

Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much, and please tell Chris, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush

And tell my little sister that she is the only one now, and tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best

Mummy I'm not the first I'm no better than the rest, mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class, and never to forget this and please don't let this pass

Mummy why'd it have to be me no one deserves this, mummy warn the others, mummy I left without a kiss

And mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try, I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry

Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest, but mummy please remember I'm in heaven with the rest, mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack

Mummy listen to me if you would, I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new, I guess I'm not going with daddy, on that trip to the new zoo

I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid, I wanted to be an actress

Mummy I wanted to live, but mummy I must go now the time is getting late

Mummy tell my Chris, I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date , I love you mummy I always have, I know you know it's true

Mummy all I wanted to say is "mummy I love you", In memory of the Columbian students that were lost

Please if you would, pass this around, I'd be happy if you could

Don't smash this on the ground, if you pass this on, maybe people will cry

Just keep this in heart, for the people that didn't get to say "goodbye"

Now you have two choices

1) re-post and show you care for this poor girl

2)ignore it and you have just proven you have a low-down, cold-heart

(Please just copy and paste this on to your site and show that you care)

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumb-war with yourself. So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

The Aztecs valued chocolate so highly it was worth more than a bar of gold to them. If you are a complete chocoholic, copy and paste this into your profile!

If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fan-fictions, copy this into your profile.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this into your profile.

My name is angel and I am a Fan-Fiction Addict. If you're a Fan-Fiction Addict, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you would kill to have wings, post this in your profile.

If you believe every child deserves a chance to grow up and go to school, copy and paste this into your profile

If you want world peace, a brighter future, and more chocolate, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you want the planet to become more sustainable, copy and paste this into your profile, then go recycle something.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile!

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile. (it was actually fun, sadly enough.)

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

If your profile is long, copy and paste this onto it to make it even longer.

If you obsessively have weird romance daydreams about fictional characters, copy and paste this is your profile.

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

98 of teenagers do drugs, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels.

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile.

SUPPORT THE BUNNY!

This is Bunny. Copy and paste Bunny into your signature to help him gain world domination.

()()
(0.0)
( _ )

Copy the bunny onto your profile to help him achieve world domination. Come join the dark side. (We have cookies)

Dolls and Roses

I was walking around in a store. I saw a cashier hand this little boy his money back saying,"I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll." Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'' The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Then she asked him to stay there for 5 minutes while she went to look around. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. "It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for this Christmas. She was so sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her." I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus will bring it to her after all, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there." His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall." Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me." "I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister." Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "What if we checked again, just in case you do have enough money?'' "OK" he said "I hope that I have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!" Then he looked at me and added "I asked yesterday before I slept for God to make sure I have enough money to buy this doll so that mommy can give it to my sister. He heard me!''"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' "My mommy loves white roses." A few minutes later, the old lady came again and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article: 2 days ago, which mentioned of a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car, where there was one young lady and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-assisting machine, because the young lady would not be able to recover from the coma. Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young lady had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever. The love that this little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.

Now you have 2 choices:

1) Re-post this message.

2) Ignore it as if it never touched you. have a heart.

pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer

You know if you live in 2008 when

1) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2) You haven't played solitaire with real cards for years

3) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a
screenname or my space

4) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing
the buttons on the TV

6) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

10) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did

If you are random and don't care, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you believe teenagers are stereotyped, put this on your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you find yourself making fanfictions of other fanfictions in your head, post this in your profile.

If you dream of killing a character in a book so you can go out with their boyfriend, post this in your profile.

If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or pulled the handle on a door that said push copy this into your profile

If you have done BOTH of the above copy this into your profile

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If they are right... copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you talk back to the TV, copy this into your profile. (i get yelled at a lot for it)

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.

98 of the internet population has a MySpace. If you're part of the 2 that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you secretly believe (and hope) that J.K.R. is really a Hogwarts alumni pretending it is fictional, copy this into your profile.

If you run into inanimate objects...and then blame them for it copy and paste this in your profile

If you ever fell off a chair backwards copy this into your profile (i was reaching for something behind me and the chair and i both fell. i rolled.)

If you think that people who don't like PJO are crazy/stupid/losers, copy this into your profile. (sorry to any reviewers who aren't PJO fans! Please don't leave me!)

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile. (and i have lost an argument with myself before)

TWINKLE TWINKLE LITTLE STAR IS SANG TO THE SAME TUNE AS THE ALPHABET...copy this onto your profile if you just sang it in your head to see if its true.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If Orlando Bloom said to stop breathing, 99 percent of girls currently on the face of the Earth would be dead right now. Put this on your profile if you'd be the 1 percent still alive and laughing.

I do not do drugs. I do sugar. If you're someone who does sugar, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever burned any sort of food in the microwave, oven, toaster, or on the stove, copy this into your profile.

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile.

If you've ever yelled at an inanimate object for not listening to you, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever tried to lick your elbow and knew that it was physically impossible, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever thought of something funny, started laughing, and fell & hit your head on something hard, and ended up laughing harder than you were before, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you laugh when you hurt yourself, copy and paste this into your profile (it runs in the family. me and all three of my nieces do it)

Chocolate chip cookies are yummy! If you agree, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever done anything incredibly stupid for no apparent reason, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever had a conversation with yourself, copy this to your profile. (plenty of them)

Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you don't have a myspace and you don't want a myspace, copy this into your profile.

If you lack common sense, copy and paste this onto you're profile. (so I'm told)

If you have ever had done something or said something that made perfect sense to your real friends and only caused your "peers" to look at you strangely and roll their eyes, copy and paste this into your profile.

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia: the fear of long words. Now what SmartAss came up with that? If you think that is really funny, but can't pronounce it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you wish that your name was as interesting as Scorpius Malfoy, Sirius Black, Gellert Grindelwald, Lavender Brown, Ginevra Weasley, Albus Severus Potter or anything like Nymphadora, Andromeda, Narcissa or Bellatrix, copy this into your profile.

If you are good at annoying people (especially on loooooong car journeys) copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever sang the "I know a song that gets on everybody’s nerves" song copy this into your profile!

If you are against racism, COPY THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE. The only race is humanity.

IMORTANT! READ THE FOLLOWING>>>

Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus' arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this and if you almost cried post this in your profile.

Did you know...

kissing is healthy.

bananas are good for period pain.

it's good to cry.

chicken soup actually makes you feel better.

94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.

lying is actually unhealthy.

you really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.

it's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.

89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move.

it's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.

chocolate will make you feel better.

most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.

a good friend never judges.

a good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.

boys aren't worth your tears.

we all love surprises.

Now... make a wish.

Wish REALLY hard!!

WISH WISH WISH WISH

Your wish has just been received.

Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and...

Your wish will be granted.

Stop Flamers Now!

No more shall we tolerate flamers that flame for stupid reasons such as for pairings, who wrote the story, and just because they can!

Copy and paste this into your profile if you want to join the organization called "Stop Flamers Now"

If you absolutely and without a doubt HATE and DESPISE flamers (or think they're stupid,among other insulting things)copy and paste!

If you think that there should be a 'Report flame' button thing to report flamers,copy and paste!

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes,copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think it's stupid that girls are associated with the color pink, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever thought about something when you were talking about something else, copy and paste this into your profile

If you hate those irritating mosquito's giving you mosquito bites, copy this in your profile.

If you hug cute toys when no one's looking, paste this to your profile.

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world. I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse.
I’m a CROSS-DRESSER, So I must be gay.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FAN-GIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep.
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts.
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBIC.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy.
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan.
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion.
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s.
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times.
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too. (she's getting help)
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist.
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake.
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems.
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist.

If you ever have read so many fanfics that you couldn't tell the actual story from the fanfics, copy and paste this onto your profile with your name at the end. OCEANMOON! / Rainfire of Riverclan / DarkAngelVengeance

16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"
Re-post this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things

Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts:

1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.

2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office.

3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.

5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar.

6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination.

7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after me lucky charms."

8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this years Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.

9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month."

10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand.

12) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force."

13) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work."

14) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot.

15) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it.

16) I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive.

17) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast.

18) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day."

19) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways.

20) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor.

21) I will not say the phrase, "Get a Life" to Voldemort.

22) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy.

23) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling.

24) I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning-Myrtle an eye-full."

25) I will not make, "OMGWTF" a spell.

26) It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate.

27) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways.

28) I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor shall I insist that their color's indicate that they're "covered in bees."

29) "I've heard every joke possible about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.

30) I will not go to class skyclad.

31) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "Told you I was Hard Core."

32) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.

33) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers.

34) I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion.

35) I will not call the Weasly twins, "bookends."

36) I will not call the Patil twins, "bookends."

37) I will not call the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak.

38) There is no such thing as a were-thylacine.

39) I will not give Luna Lovegood Coast-To-Coast AM transcripts.

40) Tricking a school House Elf to strip of it's clothing does not make it mine. Yes, even when I yell out "PWND!"

41) I do not weigh the same as a Duck.

42) I do not have a Dalek Patronus.

43) I will not lick Trevor.

44) Gryffindor Courage does not come in bottles labeled, "Firewhiskey."

45) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween.

46) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself to seriously.

47) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions.

48) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet.

49) "To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice.

50) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

B In Heat by crazy chick to the nines reviews
Harry Potter has a problem and there is really only one way to fix it. It's up to Hermione to educate him as usual. SLASH! Disclaimer: JKR owns all!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 13 - Words: 32,684 - Reviews: 228 - Favs: 604 - Follows: 848 - Updated: 1/3 - Published: 4/9/2012 - Harry P., Fenrir G.
Compulsion by DivertingDestiny reviews
During the Tri-Wizard Tournament, Harry is taken by the newly resurrected Voldemort. Long nights and many meetings over the summer, can Tom get Harry to see reason and come to the dark side with him? What happens if he succeeds? Slash, Mpreg, Dark!Harry
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 21,949 - Reviews: 222 - Favs: 1,004 - Follows: 694 - Updated: 6/1/2013 - Published: 4/17/2012 - Harry P., Voldemort - Complete
Gryffindors for Sale! by Slash-MangaLover reviews
The Gryffindors are getting sold off for a charity event.What happens when a certin Slytherin buys a certin Gryffindor. What will he make him do? top!Draco bottom!Harry SLASH! don't like don't read R&R!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,081 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 223 - Updated: 1/22/2013 - Published: 3/28/2012 - Draco M., Harry P.
The Dark Side of Puppy Love by yamiyugi23 reviews
What do you get with a nice Death Eater Aunt Marge, a drunken Mad-Eye, a puppy eared and tail Harry and a Death Eater whose scared of the dark? The answer this fic! DomVoldermort/SubPuppyHarry YAOI! Is an AU fic with OOC characters! Completed.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 34,594 - Reviews: 377 - Favs: 757 - Follows: 559 - Updated: 10/10/2012 - Published: 7/16/2010 - Voldemort, Harry P. - Complete
Once Upon a Potions Class by just.a.tad.crazy reviews
An explosion in potions class leads to circumstances that Draco Malfoy never could have dreamed. One shot. Warnings: OOC, smut, SLASH Update: Sorry, this is not new content. This story just required some major editing. Sorry.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,104 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 6/5/2012 - Published: 3/23/2012 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
When in the Face of Darkness by ThisIstheWaytheWorldEnds reviews
What would have happened in the Ministry of Magic if Harry had killed Bellatrix Lestrange and wanted more of the Dark magic he had come into contact with? Oneshot. Contains Dark!Harry and slight Manipulative!Dumbledore. Also contains SLASH.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,262 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 127 - Follows: 38 - Published: 1/15/2012 - Harry P., Voldemort - Complete
Afternoons With Serverus by Angelicalynn reviews
Harry learns something about Sev and a whole lot about himself. Warning slash & BDSM. Prequel to A SnapePotter Wedding and Honeymoon.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 12 - Words: 16,201 - Reviews: 142 - Favs: 407 - Follows: 193 - Updated: 8/7/2011 - Published: 5/11/2011 - Severus S., Harry P. - Complete
The crucio brings me my lover by Crescent Luna Moon reviews
AU-ish. Harry is in the graveyard after being brought by the Tri-Wizard cup and witnessed Voldemort returning, but instead of getting away, Harry gets captured. Here's what happens during that time and afterwards.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,797 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 131 - Follows: 160 - Published: 3/11/2011 - Voldemort, Harry P.
Lose Control by Iggy Marauder reviews
Harry is given a choice: give up his control, or die. /HPxTR, rated M, yaoi, songfic/
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,193 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 312 - Follows: 60 - Published: 2/9/2011 - Harry P., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Sorry, I Tripped by Nikkii-Love706 reviews
Somehow Harry ended up on the floor with a warm object on top of him in a deserted classroom. Gift-fic for dragonworldinc! Yaoi! Fluff! Smut! COMPLETE!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,105 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 130 - Follows: 26 - Published: 1/13/2011 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
The Delectable Scent by WonderFuuandMisaki reviews
AU At the DoM Harry kills Bellatrix Lestrange and joins the dark as he can no longer return to the light. He is put in Greyback's custody and it leads both of them discovering feelings they never they possessed. Slash.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 15,119 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 238 - Follows: 372 - Updated: 11/25/2010 - Published: 1/3/2010 - Fenrir G., Harry P.
Pretty In Pink by CastielzDean by CastielzDean reviews
Castiel discovers Dean's secret kink. PWP. Rated hard M NC-17 for a reason! MM sex, Explicit Slash, graphic/ explicit sex scene & bondage, with some humour thrown in at the end. If you don't like MM sex or Slash, then don't read this.
Supernatural - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,826 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 11 - Published: 7/8/2010 - Dean W., Castiel
And Then He Kissed Me by potterinu reviews
Chamber of Secrets. Harrys life has not been very pleasant so far. Magic didn't improve his life as much as he would have liked. Tom/Harry
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 765 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 9 - Published: 12/19/2009 - Harry P., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Gary's Back GaryJimmy oneshot yaoi lemon 18 by Emeraldegg reviews
What happens when a vengeful, lustful Gary comes back to visit Jimmy one last time? oneshot lemon yaoi
Bully - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,619 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 6 - Published: 5/16/2009 - Jimmy H., Gary S. - Complete
Detention by SwarmOfFanGirls reviews
Draco/Harry slash! Detailed activities, beware! Draco and Harry have detention together, scrubbing out cauldrons for Snape.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,227 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 15 - Published: 2/11/2009 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Pheromones by Profound Yaoi reviews
ONESHOT This is a oneshot I came up with for Werewolf Groupie's birthday! XD It's set during 6th Year but obviously none of this really happens and OOCness. Warning: Yaoi boyxboy. Graphic lemon. Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. COMPLETE
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,545 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 542 - Follows: 88 - Published: 11/6/2008 - Fenrir G., Harry P. - Complete
Another Kind Of Magic by the goofball reviews
Follow Harry's basic education of yet another art Severus Snape is quite proficient in. If you've ever wondered what else there is to BDSM except people "beating each other up", read this. Warnings: Adult Language, Sexual Situations, BDSM, m/Slash, Spoile
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 40,281 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 453 - Follows: 169 - Updated: 4/16/2008 - Published: 4/2/2008 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Bound to Have Fun by Operamuse reviews
Harry always hated the parties at Malfoy Manner, but this time Draco has something different in mind for the after party. Contains Slash sex, light bondage, PWP
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,921 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 98 - Follows: 17 - Published: 2/16/2008 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Yule Ball reviews
Tiana Potter needs a date to the yule ball, and who would guess she goes with the Slytherin Ice Prince himself. Fem!Harry, 4th year.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 8 - Words: 8,240 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 119 - Updated: 12/14/2012 - Published: 7/16/2012 - Draco M., Harry P.
Gone reviews
Harry has finally loses it. What will Hogwarts without out their Golden Boy? independent!Harry,semi-Dark!Harry
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 474 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 20 - Published: 9/8/2012 - Harry P.
Death of Moony reviews
Sirius gives Hera terrible news. In-line with missing
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 367 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/16/2012 - Harry P. - Complete
Jaimee Potter: The First Muraudess reviews
Jaimee Xena Potter made a startling discovery. She hates all to do with muggles. Dark Slytherin Animagus Fem!Harry. free teacher!Paddy and teacher!Moony Ron/Hermione bashing
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 340 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 63 - Published: 6/3/2012 - Draco M., Harry P.
The fear of reviews
Remus is using boggarts again. This time Harry can't get away.What is his fear. Ronbashing
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 6 - Words: 1,141 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 6/3/2012 - Published: 6/1/2012 - Draco M., Harry P.
Missing reviews
Draco is doing his prefect rounds when he hears singing from the Astronomy Tower. Fem!Harry/Draco, Ron & Hermione bashing, 5th year, NO FLAMES
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 473 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 156 - Follows: 42 - Published: 6/1/2012 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete