Author has written 5 stories for Inuyasha.
I'm a 36 year old stay at home mom of 4 kids. I got hooked on this while I was rescerching Info about the series of Inuyasha for my 12 year old. Sometimes I just love good old fashion smut.
37 Things to do in an Elevator
1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at each floor.
8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.
16. Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Call out "Group hug!" then enforce it.
23. Make car race noises when someone gets on or off.
24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.
25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.
28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it.
29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.
31. Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.
32. Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.
33. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
34. Tell people that you can see their aura.
35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time..."
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos! ...You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (I don't know about you, but I don't have X-ray vision :/)
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (Which would be...?)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (What?! I LOVE eating frozen dinners!)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (...DARN IT!!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (Are you sure about that? I thought it would be cold after heating! You learn something everyday, I suppose)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't that be much quicker?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (Man, now my 11-year old can't drive to school!)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (Oh! I had no idea sleep aids could do that!)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (Gah. I was planning to use them in space!)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (OH NO!!)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (That idea never even occurred to me!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (EAT nuts? Really? No way!)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." ( What a rip off!)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (Okay!)
On a package of pasta after the cooking insturctions:"Put on fork and eat." (But...I was gonna kill someone with this! Are you telling me I actually have to EAT it?)
Now that you've smiled at least once, Copy and Paste this onto your profile
Things I learned from my Mom
Because the one person who will always love you, will always be there, and never leave you...is probably your Mother. And she won't let you forget it, either.
Normal people: Don't believe in demons, there's no way they exist.
Inuyasha Fans: Believe in them because they are in human form like Sexy Sesshomaru-sama!
Normal people: Don't believe in time travel.
Inuyasha Fans: Shove those people down the bone eaters well.
Normal people: Throw away a rusty old sword.
Inuyasha Fans: Keep it! It could be Tetsusaiga! (Then Inuyasha'll come and get it)
Normal people: Wouldn't take the risk if it meant endangering themselves.
Inuyasha Fans: Go for it! Inuyasha'll protect us! (Or Sesshomaru if you're a friend of Rin)
Normal people: Don't care about the moon.
Inuyasha Fans: Obsess over the moon. It's Inuyasha's time of the month (Well that sounded wrong :P )
Normal people: Think animal parts on humans are freaky.
Inuyasha Fans: Love animalistic features! Ears for Inuyasha! Tails for Sesshomaru and Koga! Fangs for all and claws for all! And Fox feet for Shippo-chan!
Normal people: Call Inuyasha a childish cartoon.
Inuyasha Fans: Instantly duck and cover as the demons take revenge... then join in. Or Even better, become assassins for those who dare to call it a cartoon!
Normal people: Don't realize what the drop in temperature means.
Inuyasha Fans: Know that Kikyo (the slut!!!) is lurking about eating souls of innocent women. (Zombie woman! Run for your lives! AHHHH!)
Normal people: Say that money is power.
Inuyasha Fans: Wave the Sacred jewel around and wish for more than that. (Maybe a boy character or two...)
Normal people: Hit the person who just groped them and think they are sick.
Inuyasha Fans: Know that it's only Miroku's incarnation or one of his lectures decendants... (Then hit them anyway)
Normal people: Don't think a boomarang could be a weapon.
Inuyasha Fans: Introduce the none believers to Sango in a rage.
Normal people: Think long haired boys are girly.
Inuyasha Fans: Wouldn't ever cut a teenager boy's hair if he looked like one of the hotties!
Normal people: Wouldn't know why the wind suddenly blew them over.
Inuyasha Fans: Know it's Kagura having a hissy fit when someone flirts with Sesshomaru.
Normal people: Would suddenly find themselves knocked out when they flirted with Kagome.
Inuyasha Fans: Would know better and would stay away from 'The hanyou's girl' on pain of death and a lot of Inuyasha beatings for being too close to his koishii.
Normal people: Wouldn't copy and past this because they wouldn't know what the hell this was about because they are NORMAL!!!
Inuyasha Fans: Would instantly copy and paste this to show the world how proud they are to be Inuyasha fans and would recomend it to all their friends! We Love it!
Anyway, if you would like to join the awesome religion which is Inuyashism, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list! Followers: purduepup, nightfalcon222, Daichilover, xbeautyxxisxxlifex, GoldenRose88Kagome39, CityOfFallenAshes, Tenshi 'Gome, xx-BlackXRoseXLust-xx, When God Abandoned The World, AnimeRomanceFreak1990, Rangurren, kanna37, Mountainflower, Miketsukami-kun, Stardust Miko
Love vs. Sex
A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year.
She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away. As she walked along under the tall elmtrees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger.
When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection.
Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story.
The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before.
When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed.
The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her.
When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her."
Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God? Repost this as Love vs. Sex if you truly believe in God.
PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what... and if you stand up for him he will stand up for you. I bet 93 of you people that read this won't repost