Frosty Glass
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Joined 06-08-12, id: 4045571, Profile Updated: 09-16-12
Author has written 2 stories for Bleach, Plants vs. Zombies, and Samurai 7.

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Welcome, Intrepid Explorer, to my profile. You must really be bored to have made it to this dinky little corner of the World Wide Web ...

Since you're here, you might as well read on and perhaps discover a few things you didn't think you would. For example, did you know that when you sneeze, it's impossible to keep your eyes open?

That's a lie.

No, what I really aught to tell you is a bit about me. If you wish, feel free to skip this part – I don't find it particularly interesting, myself ... But hey, there's no accounting for taste.

I'm called Frosty by everyone except my mother (for reasons which will remain private, to her, I'm the Evil Empress of Darkness) and my dear cousin, Nikki, who affectionately calls me Tumour. She's a doll, isn't she?

When I told my above-mentioned cousin that I was updating my profile, she got a very peculiar glint in her eye. Being well acquainted with her eye-glints and the trouble they normally cause, I was terrified to the core. She smiled – an even more dangerous sign – and offered to help me, quote, “give your profile some spice”. Naturally, I rebelled, telling her no, it's all right, I'll manage … My voice was reduced to a weak squeak as she gave me a cheery grin and thumbs-up. “It's okay,” she said. “I insist.”

That was the end of my resistance. Never, I repeat, never go against a woman with Short Shit Syndrome. (The fact that I also suffer from it is completely besides the point - she's had a lot more practice.)

Because I caved in like the pathetic coward that I am, I was required to put the following info sheet, lovingly prepared by Nikki herself, on this, my profile page. Read with caution – she's a bald-faced liar.

Name: Frosty, aka Tumour, aka Minkie

Age: 16 going on 74

Appearance: Conveniently pocket-sized with enough piercings to make ear-wringing a very interesting game indeed

Occupation: Student by night, masked vigilante baker by morning, casual candlemaking enthusiast by afternoon, and aspiring novelist in her dreams.

Likes: Stealing my food, my time, my couch space, my computer, my cats' affection, my books, my kitchen, my peace of mind, and my sanity.

Dislikes: People who are rude, people who are ignorant, people who are mean, people who blame their young age for their shortcomings, people who hunt animals for sport, people who wear fur, people who shove their religious beliefs down other peoples' throats, people who are shallow, people who don't understand the difference between “you're” and “your”, and people who are Justin Bieber.

Fun Facts: She will scream at the television like a banshee when someone does something stupid, and she'll scream at you too, if you try to shush her. Also, when she's feeling depressed (which, bless her, is quite often for such a cheerful soul) she will assume her “Ulquiorra” look, consisting of too much black and green makeup, a dour expression, and a jacket with long coattails. She's also rather proud of the fact that she's built almost exactly like the Quatra Espada, but vehemently denies that fact under questioning.

I'm cringing as I write this. I ask you, is there anything more embarrassing than your family? Honestly, I do not believe that there is. Nikki, my dear, dear cousin, for this injustice, you will never receive another basket of baked goodies from me ever again.

I must add, though, that the “Dislikes” part of the sheet was actually written by yours truly. I felt it was too important to leave to the likes of Miss Deathstare The Destroyer.

Now, on another note entirely: If you're so inclined, you can find me on Twitter under the username Frosty_Glass, and there's an orange gremlin named Miranda washing his feet in my sink.

That's a lie as well.

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There's A Zombie On Your Lawn reviews
The following contains more teenage angst than you can shake a doom-shroom at. Oh, and zombies – some of those too.
Plants vs. Zombies - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 934 - Reviews: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/25/2012 - Published: 7/24/2012
The World's Most Surly Hero reviews
In which Orihime has a random encounter with someone possessed of even brighter hair than Ichigo. His name? Kyuuzo, of course. The first Bleach/Samurai 7 crossover!
Crossover - Bleach & Samurai 7 - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,250 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/23/2012 - Orihime I. - Complete