Author has written 1 story for Twilight.
Re-posted SU 2012 under this pseudo-penname for non-TWCS members.
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(06/27/12) *laughs* Someone pointed out that non-TWCS members can't see the original/other reviews on TWCS. *snorts* Of course not. Sorry 'bout that! Here you go ...
P.S. You really should sign up for a TWCS account. Just sayin'. :D You're only getting the first two chapter reviews, received from post date up until today, below (and there are a lot of great stories found only there, needing the readership) ...
: CHAPTER 2 :
—>June 27, 2012 *squee* You've done it again! Such hotness! I'm totally melting in a puddle. Your position is somewhat similar to mine but I think you did yours TONS better. Demetri and Bella are actually some sort of a guilty-pleasure ship for me so I'm super pleased that you picked them! :)
Your prose is beautiful as usual. Such vivid imagery! LOVE LOVE LOVE this!! :) Can I keep you please! :)
—>June 26, 2012 * AWWW- ten fingers and ten toes. SO sweet and what an unexpected sentiment at the end of that yummy lemon.
This was lovely- "Our heavy breathing fills the room as slowly and as surely as he begins to fill me."
This felt needy and desperate because of the way Bella narrated it. Good job. Thank you for writing.
: CHAPTER 1 :
—>June 24, 2012 "writing holds my dreams and adventures, all with a small sense of anonymity, a non-confrontational facelessness to expression."
"But revolving need overrides. My body pushes, and arms pull; he sucks one side, and his fingers rub the peak of the other. I tug dandelion locks; he tugs with gentle teeth before pulling away. Gazes meet, and expressions match: dazed and glazed eyes, parted mouths, and jaws held forward a little."
I'd quote the whole ending... The whole dropping to their knees and fingers and thighs and "There's no escaping him or the impending release." GAH! I die. And as I already tweeted to you, I want to see where this story goes.
Wondering about heights, etc. At one point he drops to his knees but can reach her breasts with his mouth?
Boobs bothered me. In general, the word doesn't, It has its uses. But it jumped out at me here. You've got so much sensual stuff going on and then "He abruptly returns to my boobs." It felt abrupt and slightly interupted my panting, thank you. I'd replace it with breasts.
—>June 22, 2012 oh, what a great idea. I love it. Really I ahve nothing wrong with it, except the fact that the top bit seems to drag a little bit. As soon as you got into the action the flow was great. Really good work.
oh and "rich Auchentoshan Three Wood Single Malt Scotch seen from the bottom of a glass as it embodies light" Best Description for Edward's hair EVER!
—>June 21, 2012 Wow! I'm not normally one to enjoy pairings between Bella and anyone other than Edward, but this was really hot. I absolutely loved your Caius. He's sexy and a little bit dangerous if my opinion counts for anything.
I especially loved the way you weaved "Smut University" into the story. It was really catchy. And, I don't think I'm alone when I say that there are times every woman would love be enrolled in the practicum rather than the lecture version.
Great, great job!
My favorite lines:
(2) Honestly, I wish my husband would say something like this to me someday.
—>June 20, 2012 Sorry for taking so long to read and review, but I needed to find a block of time to read this full-on story! Though the length was daunting to me at first, I'm glad I carved out the time. Your insecurity is so unfounded. Your descriptions of the scene are rich, it makes me really envision what is happening. I could feel her fear and nerves, just as I could feel it when they finally fell away. Your narrative sweeps the reader up and carries them away. Great work - I look forward to seeing more from you.
—>June 19, 2012 It's a shame this was pulled from FF. More should see this. It was wonderfully erotic and the story line in itself was genious incorporating the Smut U theme. Would like to see more of this O/S :) Jeeze, I am becoming such a big fan of Caius!
—>June 17, 2012 When I read the word "balut", I laughed so hard. Bella was so brave to even try it. I know a lot of Filipinos who are disgusted by that particular delicacy.
I love how you string words together. One of my favorites, because I have a LOT in this story, is, "It is therapy and confession—not an escape, but a real and humbling pleasure." I won't bother posting all my other favorite lines else I run out of characters! Suffice it to say I really love your work and am looking forward to reading more from you this summer. :)
(Original FFN reviews)
—> bmitw 6/17/12 . chapter 1.God. That was really something, just goes to show you don't need the full-on sex to have a memorable lemon. Having said that I could totally go for another chapter of it :) And did I mention how Caius starved I am? He is supreme.
—> littleshygirl888 6/17/12 . chapter 1This story is genius! Perfect for what we are about to get into. I can't really find anything wrong with this. Bravo! :)
—> DG 6/16/12 . chapter 1 Wow. I so miss you writing and updating. You always tie things together nicely with some kind of theme or concept, and this was to writing - "lines, verbs, and words". I noticed you do it with paragraphs too...
"like rich Auchentoshan Three Wood Single Malt SCOTCH seen from the bottom of a glass as it embodies light—hurriedly ascended the steps before tinted windows SWALLOWED it. My MOUTH goes dry. My heart speeds up."
"They hold and LURE, drawing me in, and promising WAVES of pleasure in a SEA of grey."
And how you did it to Bella's personality and thoughts, the idea of sex and writing, the cliches and feel of writing, especially in terms with fanfic smut.. I think I even caught a few double entendres the second time around... just WOW! Stunning!
—> thalia-csiny 6/16/12 . chapter 1Wow! OMG! This is easily the best pre-assignment, just wow! Your writing is so beautiful and vivid; each sentence was crafted so wonderfully and I just love every single moment of me reading it.
I was a little apprehensive when we got to the part with Bella and Caius because I've never read that pairing before but you wrote it so well that I didn't feel weird or anything like that while reading it. You, my lady, can definitely write smut. Mind-blowing, sexy, unbelievably hot smut! I can't wait to read more of your work! Just WOW!
—> eDWards.headboard 6/15/12 . chapter 1* I love your concept and the comparisons to how we're all probably feeling going into this "summer long course of sex".
"like rich Auchentoshan Three Wood Single Malt Scotch seen from the bottom of a glass as it embodies light"- I LOVE this description (even though I don't know this particular brand). I'm really over reading about copper hair. Well done!
"inserts fingers—one of his and mine—"This really got me! It's definitely one of the hottest lines I've read in a while.
Be confident. You did a great job. Thank you for writing!
—>lovelydee04 6/15/12 . chapter 1LOL. This was great, Rain! I love how you always capture your characters with the narration and theme - especially the comparison of Bella writing smut, you with writing and smut, and with writing for the SmutU class. It was funny and so true - the vulnerability is exactly why I won't post stories. Too scary.
I really enjoyed your different descriptions, too - quirky because of this Bella, and very original for fanfic. The cliches and her inner dialogue made me laugh. I could her voice and picture it all.
Well done! Really!
—>PrettyKittyArtist 6/15/12 . chapter 1 Girl...
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