Author has written 1 story for Harry Potter.
Quotes of awesomeness
You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, and I laugh even harder
It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 muscles to smile, but only 4 to reach out and slap someone
Don't knock on deaths door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that
Boys are like trees – they take fifty years
Be yourself. That's crazy enough.
They say guns don't kill people. People kill people. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled, "BANG!" i don't think you'd kill many people
Flying is not inherently dangerous- crashing is.
I have animal magnetism-- when I go outside, squirrels stick to my sleeves.
The trouble with real life is that there is no background music
I have not lost my mind; its backed up on a disk somewhere
Beware the letter 'G'. It is the end of everything.
Forecast for tonight: darkness
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
If everything seems to be going well, you obviously overlooked something
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall through a sewer hole and die.
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it
Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.
Some people are born great, some people achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.
Heaven doesn't want me there and Hell knows I'll take over.
Wanna know how to keep an idiot busy? Take him into a round room and tell him to sit in a corner.
There is no great genius without a mixture of madness
Lately the only thing keeping me from becoming a serial killer is my dislike for manual labor.
PMS: Every woman's legal right to be a *.
Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them as much
My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems
If aliens are looking for intelligent life, why the hell are you scared?!
I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.
Me and the gummy bears have a plot to rule the world but shhh its a secret!
I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my *!
Wherever there is life there is love
Boy break hearts so why don't we break their necks?
Exactly how much fun can I have before I go to hell?
HELL- Where all the fun people end up! ( Nico Di Angelo ) ( XD )
Some say the glass is half full, others the glass is half empty, all I want to know is who's drank my water!
All people have the right to stupidity but some people abuse the privilege.
Life isn't about the number of breaths we take, but the moments that take our breath away. Like choking.
Come to the dark side. We have cookies.
Being weird is like being normal, only better.
"Try Not To Cry"- Seriously, if your eyes don't at least get a little misty when you read this you have a problem.
Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,
He told his friends that it was cool,
And when he pulled the trigger back,
It shot with a great, huge crack.
Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!
When I went to school that day,
I never said good-bye.
I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.
When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,
And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.
Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,
And please tell James; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.
And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,
And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now
And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best
Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest
Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,
And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass
Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.
But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.
And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try
I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.
Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,
But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest
When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could
please listen to me if you would,
I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new
I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo
I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,
I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.
But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,
Mommy, tell my James, I'm sorry to cancel the date.
I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true
And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"
So, Please if you would, Don't smash this on the ground.
If you pass this on,
Maybe people will cry and remember how blessed they truly are,
Just keep this in your heart,
For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".
Now you have 2 choices,
1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as "Try Not To Cry"
2) Don't pass it on, and show the cold, heartless person you really are
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
A guy wrote this... why do boys fall in love with girls? (This was written by a guy) Don't break this; it's so sweet! :)
1. They will always smell good even if it's just shampoo.
2. The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder.
3. How cute they look when they sleep.
4. The ease in which they fit into our arms.
5. The way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world.
6. How cute they are when they eat.
7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end it makes it all worth while.
8. Because they are always warm even when its minus 30 outside.
9. The way they look good no matter what they wear.
10. The way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful girl on this earth.
11. How cute they are when they argue.
12. The way her hand always finds yours.
13. The way they smile.
14. The way you feel when you see their name on the your cell after you just had a big fight.
15. The way she says "lets not fight anymore" - even though you know that an hour later...
16. The way that they kiss after you have had a fight.
17. The way they kiss you when you say "I love you".
18. Actually...Just the way they kiss you...
19. The way they fall into your arms when they cry.
20. Then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly.
21. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt. i think every girl is guilty of this :)
22. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt (even though we don't admit it).
23. The way they say "I miss you".
24. The way you miss them.
25. The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore...
Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them it matters not. Because once in your life, whatever they were to the world they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes, traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without trace of a sound, you know that your own life is inevitable consumed within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart. We love them for a million reasons, no paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of the mind but of the heart. A feeling. Only felt.
This chain started in 2002. It is a love chain letter. In an hour you are supposed to repost this. Congratulations!! You have been chosen to participate in the LONGEST and the LUCKIEST chain letter on the internet. Once you read this letter, you must IMMEDIATELY (meaning within the hour) post it with the title "why do boys fall in love with girls? " After you send it, make a wish and it will come true...
Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods…
On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (And that would be how?)
On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's 'just' a suggestion!)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (Printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down. (Too late! you lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (Are you sure? Let's experiment.)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldn't that save more time?)
On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. (We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol sleep aid: Warning-may cause drowsiness. (One would hope!)
On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: keep out of children. (Hmm...Something must have gotten lost in the translation...)
On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to use in outer space.)
On a food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (Now I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts. (But no peas?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. (Somebody got paid big bucks to write this one…)
On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands. (Raise your hand if you've tried this.)
On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)
PLEASE DON'T READ!!!
Don't say I didn't warn you...
About six yearsago in Indiana, Carmen Winstead was pushed down a sewer opening by five girls in her school, trying to embarrass her in front of her school during a fire drll. When she didn't submerge, the police were called. They went down and brought up 17-year-old Carmen Winstead's body, with her neck broken from hiting the ladder, then the concrete at the bottom. The girls told everyone that she fell...and they believed them.
THEY HURT HER
FACT: About to months later, 16-year-old David Gregory read this post but didn't repost it. When he went to take a shower, he heard laughter, started freaking out, and ran t his computer to repost it. He said goodnight to his mom and went to sleep, but five hours later, his mom woke up in the middle of the night from a loud noise an David was gone. A few hours later, the police found him in the sewer, with a broken neck and the skin on his face peeled off.
Even Google er name - you'll find this to be true.
If you don't rpost saying "They hurt her," then Carmen will get you, either from a sewer, the toilet, the shower, or when you go to sleep, you'll wake up in the sewer, in thedark, then Carmen will come and kill you.
On Decembe 24th, 2006 at 8:00 in the morning, a 14-year-old boy by the name of Scott Jackson was found dead. Doctors couldn't come up with the cause of his death. Hi mother checked is e-mails to see if she could figure out what happened. Turns out he was still signed into his Yahoo e-mail account. She found he had gone to leep after he rea and didn't send a chain letter about a little girl who kills you in your sleep with no natural cause of death. This is the e-mail she read: My nae is Ofelia Heras I'm 16 years old. I'm a murderer. I have no face. When you look at me you'll die immediately. You have 900 seconds to repost this onto your pofile or I will visi you tonight
-This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. -Lucillia