Poll: Would you like me to create a separate email so you can email me ideas for stories when I'm on a writer's block? (You will get shoutouts depending on your wishes) Vote Now!
Author has written 1 story for Hetalia - Axis Powers.
I still write but I've contracted an acute case of ISD so I don't have time to write often :(
Want to send me art, suggestions, or more private reviews? Send them to email@example.com ! I'm also taking writing commissions, and beta reading is open again :D
Copy the bunny onto your profile to help him achieve world domination. Come join the dark side. (We have cookies)
They say, "Guns don't kill people. People kill people." Well, I think the gun helps. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people
STUPID PRODUCT LABELS:
On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping (Yeah, that's kind of hard to do, you know, use while sleeping).
On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside (How fun to be a shoplifter).
On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap (I never would have guessed).
On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost (Really? Amazingly ingenious).
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down (Too late!).
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating (Fascinating. You learn something new every day. Like, the people who write this things are FREAKING MORONS!).
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body (Well, it would save time...).
On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery (Ya we can really help stop those traffic accidents if we just get those toddlers to stop driving).
On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness (I would hope so).
On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: keep out of children (Um. Okay...)
On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only (And my other options were...).
On a food processor: Not to be used for the other use (Which would be...?).
On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts (Oh wow. I didn't know that before).
On an Amerian Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts (Amazing. No one could ever do that without the help of the instructions on this packet. Great).
On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands (I believe that was implied).
On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly (So you don't want kids jumping off buildings, arms outstretched?).
10 Ways To Annoy People
1. Go Into A Grocery Store And Follow Someone Around Asking, "Guess What?"
2. Go Into A Department Store And Sneak Up On Somebody Who Is Talking On A Cell Phone And Whisper, "Who're Ya Talkin' To?" And When They Say, "Hey Dude, Can I Have A Little Privacy Please?" You Say, "No, 'Cause You're In Public, Bud. You Can't Have Privacy In Public!"
3. Do The Old Trick When You Put Dog Crap In A Bag Then Set It On Fire, And Leave It On Somebody's Doorstep. So If They're Going To Try To Stomp It Out, They Have To Get Dog Crap All Over Their Shoe.
4. Prank Call The Same Person Over And Over Asking Them What Color Their Underwear Is.
5. If You're A Guy, You'll Love This One. Go Into Hot Topic And Pretend To Have A Heart-attack, And When A Hot Blonde Does CPR, Start Kissing Her. (Warning: This One Can Get You Slapped And Maybe A Butt-whooping From Her Boyfriend)
6. Go Into A Public Restroom And Use The Toilet Paper As A Mummy Wrap, And Jump Out Screaming, "Boo!"
7. Come Running Out Of A Restroom Saying To Random People, "Whoa Dude! Come See The Size Of The One I Just Made!"
8. Noisily Chew Gum Behind Someone Who Is Trying To Read, And When They Turn Around, Spit It Out And Hold It Out To Them And Say, "Hey, Want Some? It's Watermelon!"
9. Go Into The Toy Section And Leave A 'Used Diaper' On The Ground And Say, "The Dolly Had An Accident."
10. Go Into A Mall At Christmas Time And Pull Off Santa's Beard Screaming, "Holy Cow! It's A Fake! He Ain't Real!"
16 Things to do when your in Walmart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There's no toilet paper in here!
15. Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!"
16. Jack a Nintendo Wii by jacking a bike and riding out of the store.