Author has written 2 stories for Hunger Games.
okay... so it's been a long long LONG while since I've visited my own fanfiction account. um... my writing could use serious improvement, so I guess that means my stories are currently being edited and so won't be updated until further notice. if you're here and reading this, thanks so much for sticking with me! I probably have no readers left, sadly enough aha.
Some funny stuff!
Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.
When you are in jail a friend will bail you out, but a best friend will be sitting right next to you saying "dang, that was fun!"
People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.
Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.
When someone is annoying you, it takes 42 muscles to frown at them, but only 4 to reach out and punch their face.
Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.
Boys are like trees, they take 50 years to grow up.
Friends will always be like "Well, you deserve better!" but best friends will prank call him saying "Seven days..."
A friend will comfort you when he rejects you, but a best friend will go up to him and say "Its because you're gay isn't it?"
I called your boyfriend "gay" and he hit me with his purse!
People say "Guns don't kill people, People kill people!" Well, I think guns help. If you stood there and yelled Bang, I don't think you'd kill too many people.
The toothfairy teaches kids it's okay to sell body parts.
I'm not crazy. My reality is just different then yours.
Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.
I was about to take over the world, but I got distracted when I saw something shiny.
Most people learn by observation, and there are the few who learn by experimentation. And then there are those who actually TOUCH the fire to see if it's really hot.
I'm so gangster, I carry a squirt gun.
You don't like me, well it's mind over matter. I don't mind and you don't matter.
364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that?
You're a special kind of stupid, aren't you?
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary.
One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh, he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask directions.
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.
Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?
A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.
Heaven doesn't want me and hell is afraid I'll take over.
I'm not random, I'm just HEY LOOK A SQUIRREL!
It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's hysterical.
You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You jump off a cliff, I laugh.
It takes skill to trip over flat surfaces.
The early bird gets the worm, but it's the second mouse that gets the cheese.
I dream of a better world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned.
They never suspect the short one.
Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
I didn't slap you, I high-fived your face.
You're a great friend, but if the zombies are chasing us, I'm tripping you.
Hey stupid! Your sock is untied!
Ever notice that studying is "student" and "dying" put together?
I'm not random, you just can't think as fast as me.
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
We're so cool ice cubes are jealous.
I'm not as random as you think I salad.
On a scale of 1 to crazy I'm a penguin.
Hey you! Yeah you! No, not you, the other guy. You right there! Do you like tacos?
Making us all wish we were blind: Speedo.
Worst time to have a heart attack; during a game of charades.
If you're reading this then you're not dead. Good for you.
I ROCK! Guitar hero told me.
I tried being normal, but I didn't like it.
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall through a sewer hole and die.
We're not retreating! We're advancing in a different direction!
Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever, you keep on talking
The below statement is true
The above statement is false
PMS: Every woman's legal right to be a bitch.
Quick, whats the number for 9-1-1?
Boys break hearts so why don't we break their necks?
I'm NOT SHORT!! ... I'm fun sized!
Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.
I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger...then it hit me.
(Or, Hunger Games version that's making fun of Marvel,)
I wondered why the arrow was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
Read this and try not to cry:
Wanna kill yourself? Imagine this. You come home from school one day. You’ve had yet another horrible day. You’re just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you’ve written and rewritten over and over and over. You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last time. You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your eyes for the very last time. A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you dinner's ready. You don’t answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you’re asleep. He tells your mom this. Your mom goes to your room to wake you up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it. Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She’s screaming your name. Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that “Mommy is crying and sissy won’t wake up.” Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mom, crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him, what’s going on, and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry. Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying. The next day at school, there’s an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames themselves. Your teachers think they were too hard on you. Those mean popular girls, they think of all the things they’ve said to you. That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can’t help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are. Your ex boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you.. He can’t handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of the school. Your friends? They’re sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you before it was too late. And your best friend? She’s in shock. She can’t believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad… Bad enough for you to end it. She can’t cry, she can’t feel anything. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out. It’s a few days later, at your funeral. The whole town came. Everyone knew you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. The one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots of people talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot. Everyone’s crying, your little brother still doesn’t know you killed yourself, he’s too young. Your parents just said you died. It hurts him, a lot. You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there for him. Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they start lowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it. She cries and cries and doesn’t stop for days. It’s two years later. The whole school talks to a counselor/therapist at least once a week. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls have eating disorders now. That boy that used to tease you cuts himself. Your ex boyfriend doesn’t know how to love anymore and just sleeps around with girls. Your friends all go into depression. Your best friend? She tried to kill herself. She didn’t succeed like you did, but she tried…your brother? He finally found out the truth about your death. He self harms, he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to your suicide. Your parents? Their marriage fell apart. Your dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death. Your mom got diagnosed with depression and just lays in bed all day. People care. You may not think so, but they do. Your choices don’t just effect you. They effect everyone. Don’t end your life, you have so much to live for. Things can’t get better if you give up. I’m here for absolutely anyone that needs to talk, no matter who you are. Even if we’ve NEVER talked before, I’m here for you. Copy and paste this onto your profile to show people there are people out there that care.
On Sears hairdryer:
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
Hunger Games Oath
I promise to remember Rue
I’ll think of Foxface every time
If a little girl ever pets a goat
And if my best friend acts depressed
When I toss some wood into the fire
And I’ll always think of Peeta
The Capitol will cross my mind
I’ll be sure to think of Clove
I’ll always think of Glimmer
And Thresh will occupy my mind
Whenever I watch a reality show
I’ll sure imagine Haymitch
I swear to think of Cato
I’ll make sure I think of Effie
I swear to remember the Hunger Games
If you've ever threatened a computer or video game console, sopy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever sung a song you hated so much, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.
If you wish more people were like your friends on fanfic, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you like blue copy this to your profile.
Eighty percent of Americans don't smoke. If you're one of that eighty percent, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are a Nintendo fan to your very core, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever walked into a wall, door, table, chair, or other large solid object even when it was in plain sight, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you don't do drugs, copy/paste this into your profile.
If you like to write, copy/paste this into your profile.
If you think that being unique is better than being cool then put this on your profile.
If you get excited just hearing an ice cream truck, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you work better to music, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, post this in your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.
If you probably need a life but have no intentions of getting one, put it on your profile.
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, put this in your profile.
If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get two reviews, copy this into your profile.
welp. onto my works that really need to be edited. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.