Author has written 12 stories for Sgt. Frog/ケロロ軍曹, Samurai 7, Soul Eater, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Name: Check the username, LIKE I'D GIVE YOU MY NAME!!! But you can call me AG13, Alien-Chan, or Sunny
Birthday: November 18, 1999
Taken or Single: Single
Best Friends: Luggaa, KuroroandGiroro, and Yosdellillian Skywalker, SexyKunoichi
Matryoshka by Miku and GumiHold Release Rakshasa and Carcasses by Miku
PonPonPon by Kyary Pamyu Pamyu
Someone's Watching Over Me by Hillary Duff
Guardian Angel by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
Monster by Skillet
Whispers in the Dark by Three Days Grace
I Hate Everything About You by Three Days Grace
Animal I Have Become by Three Days Grace
Time of Dying By Three Days Grace
(Pretty much anything by Three Days Grace.)
Bullet by Hollywood Undead.
Radioactive By Imagine Dragons
Demons By Imagine Dragons
Faking My Own Suicide By Relient K
Starstruck by 3OH!3
Pairings I Support:
Saburo X DEATHBED!!!!!! :)
Ukyo x DEATHBED!! :)
Juliet x Nick
Soul x Maka
Kid x Liz
Male Crona x Patty
Female Crona x Ragnarok
Tsubaki x Black Star
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2012)
Casey x DEATHBED!! :)
Pairings I HATE!!!!!!
To make this short, I just do not like the Yaoi Yuri and crack pairings (Sometimes I make exemptions with crack pairings.)
Things I Like:
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2012)
Kululu, SOOOO SMEXY O/O
Giroro, He's sooo BEAST! And such a sweetheart!
Donatello, He's soooo Adorkable!
Anime and Manga
Reading, Writing, and Writing/Reading Fanfictions
(Basically all my fave pairing fanfics.)
The colors Red, Yellow, Green, Navy Blue, and Light Blue (Get the referance?)
Annoying people to a point of Insanity
Sleeping and dreaming
Scaring people :)
Things I HATE!!
Saburo from Sgt Frog
Ukyo from Samurai 7
Casey Jone from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2012)
JUSTIN FRICKIN BEIBER!!! HIS MUSIC BURNS!!!!!!!
When people do not get my humor
Yaoi and Yuri
SABURO, UKYO, AND JUSTIN BIEBER AGAIN!!!
When people watch me when I'm on the computer!! (This means YOU!!)
Fanfiction Terminology (Trust me, you will need to know this stuff)
OC-Own Character-A character you invent
OOC-Out Of Character-When an existing character's personality is a little bit off from how they're normally shown
POV-Point Of View-First person, third person, et cetera
OTP-One True Pairing-One ship that is your absolute favorite and you whole-heartedly support
R&R-Read And Review-Self-explanatory
F&F-Favorite and Follow-Self-explanatory
PM-Private Message-Used to message other authors/readers/fanfictoners
HIATUS-A story put on pause until further notice
i.e/f.e-in example, for example-not Fanfiction-specific terms, but helpful to know
Flame-A hateful review meant more to put someone down then to help them improve. I.e, saying "You're story is stupid and everything's spelled wrong!" over "You may want to spellcheck your stories more." NOT CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM
Mary Su/Gary Stu-A 'perfect' character that can do no wrong, always gets the guy/girl, enemies always either die or 'see the light'. TO BE AVOIDED AT ALL COSTS
Do you often...
If so, you may be suffering from SFA (Severe Fanfiction Addiction) and/or IFG (Incredible Fantasy Geekiness). There is curently no known cure, but you are not alone. Together, we can kill all the bad guys, one word at a time. Copy and paste this to your profile if you have SFA and IFG (Lord knows I do.)
TEN SURE SIGNS THAT YOU ARE AN OBSESSED FANFICTION WRITER
1. When you ask yourself a question as one character and respond as another one.
2. When you begin to compare what a friend says to something one of your characters would say.
3. When you are talking to a friend and you suddenly scream, “Oh my god! I just got the greatest idea for a story of mine!” and your idea has
4. When you lock yourself in your room, crank up the music, and act out an entire story…and then forget everything you thought of.
5. When you are listening to a song and go “Oh my god! This song is exactly what (Insert story here) is about!”
6. When you run around the house dancing and thinking of an idea, acting all crazy, and write the scene that turns out to be a very sad, calm scene.
7. When you fear to daydream because you are afraid of your characters hunting you down and killing you for the torture you put them through.
8. When you can’t fall asleep without thinking about what is going to happen in your next chapter.
9. When you begin to in vision your own version of someone else’s fanfic.
10. When you think out loud and start giggling and jumping around talking to yourself when you come up with a good idea.
If you don't want a sarcastic answer, don't ask a stupid question
Oh so true! If you agree with any of these, put them on your profile
When a boy gets jealous it's kinda cute, but when a girl gets jealous World War 3 is about to start
Telling someone why you like them is like trying to explain what water tastes like
Just because someone is single doesn't mean they're lonely. Some people are in relationships and they've forgotten what happiness is.
Sleeping is my drug. My bed is my dealer. My alarm is the police.
If a guy likes you. For you your legs and thighs. Or breasts even. Then send him to KFC.
Keep calm and be like me.
Oohh who's that sexy beast?! Oh. I just clicked on my own profile again...
Throwing your phone in anger...then checking if it's still okay
Dear MATH, stop asking to find your X cause she's not coming back.
I'm not a NERD, I'm just smarter than you.
Trying to keep a straight face in a serious situation and failing miserably.
When he makes you feel like the only girl in the world...but ends up throwing you in a dumpster the next day.
Newscasters are the people who tell you "Good evening" and then proceed to tell you why it's not.
I live in my own little world. But that's okay; they know me there.
If you can't convince them, confuse them
If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.
Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?
If your heart was really broken you'd be dead, so shut up.
You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same.
Don't make me mad... I'm known to bite at random
Most teachers promote the three R's; Reading, 'Riting, and 'Rithmetic. Then there are those that promote three S's; Sit down, Shut up, and STOP DRIVING ME CRAZY!!
Don't you dare tell me the sky is the limit when there are footsteps on the moon.
I didn't invent sarcasm, but I perfected it
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.
If you can't join 'em, bribe 'em.
If you can't bribe 'em, blackmail 'em.
If you can't blackmail 'em, kill 'em.
If you can't kill 'em, you're screwed.
When your bored and want something to do, open your text book and start writing, "Terrorist attack at 3:00 AM" on all the pages, then give it to a cop. When he asks who wrote this, say your teachers name and take him to the school.
When your teacher tells you to solve a problem on the board, go up there and start writing her life story.
Note to self: It is illegal to stab people for being stupid.
Don't upset me, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.
Smile. It scares people.
What does not kill me had better run pretty darn fast!
yeah, I'm crazy, it runs in the family, what's your excuse?
you sound almost chipper. What happened today - you run over a small child or something?
There are very few problems that can not be solved using a large amount of explosives
I write for the same reason I breathe; if I didn't I would die
I used to have super powers but my therapist took them away
If you laugh I will laugh If you cry I will cry and if you jump out a window I will laugh harder
If it starts actually raining cats and dogs, don't go outside
(the answering machine)
Hi. I am probably home. I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you
Hi, this is the refrigerator. John's answering machine is broken but i'll give the message to John. Now just speak very slowly while i write down the message and stick it to myself with these little cute magnets
I'm out of my mind! but feel free to leave me a message
(end answering machine)
My doctor asked if any members of my family suffered from insanity, I replied, no, we all seem to enjoy it
Just remember, everything happens for a reason. So when I smack you upside the head, remember... I had a reason!
Whatever it is, I didn't do it. Unless I was supposed to do it, in which case I did it brilliantly
Bleach and latex gloves: $10... Plastic wrap, trash bags and duct tape: $ 20...Chainsaw: $200
The Horrified look on the cashiers face: PRICELESS!
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it
A friend would help you up when you trip and fall. A best friend would laugh, trip you again, then laugh some more!(:
Instead of a sign that says "Do Not Disturb" I need one that says "Already Disturbed Proceed With Caution."
I don't know about you, but a highlight of my childhood was talking into the fan to hear my robot voice
I couldn't ask for better friends. I could ask for normal friends, but where's the fun in that?!
My mission is accomplished. I ran down the street, threw skittles at people, said "TASTE THE FRIKKEN RAINBOW!" so it was a good day
I am so talented I can fall up the stairs, trip on flat surfaces, and get hit by a parked car. Aren't I just amazing? :)
sometimes I just want to run up to a stranger on the street and say 'YOU'RE IT!!' and then run away
I wonder if anyone else has road rage when pushing a cart through the aisles at Wal-Mart?
The 12-step chocoholics program: NEVER BE MORE THAN 12 STEPS AWAY FROM CHOCOLATE!
Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas
Sanity? I never had such a useless thing to begin with!
Who ever said that words don't hurt never got hit by a dictionary
I have the kind of friends that if my house was burning down, they'd be there making S'mores and hitting on hot firemen
Sarcastic?! ME?! Never!
Sometimes I wonder, 'Why is that Frisbee getting bigger?'... then it hits me
Friends ask why you're crying...Best friends already have the shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry
Sarcasm is not a free service I offer...It's a personality trait
I'm smiling. That alone should scare you
I'm that type of girl that makes the devil go "oh crap, she's up!" when my feet hit the floor in the morning
Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional
What you're looking for is always in the last place you look..." Well, DUH, smart one! After you find it, you stop looking!"
When life gives you lemons, Throw them back and yell "I want oranges"
If a turtle is missing its shell is it homeless or naked?
here's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird
The voices and I took a vote, and your insane
(On a T-Shirt) Who are you, and why are you reading my shirt?
Normal people worry me.
I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
People say that I have totally lost it. I wasn't even aware I had it.
My friend text-ed me asking "what does 'idk' mean?" so I said "I don't know" and she said "omg! NO one knows!"
I'm that type of girl who walks into chairs and says sorry
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried
"If all your friends were jumping off a cliff would you jump off too?" -- "If it meant that I would never hear that stupid cliche again I would be first in line."
When in doubt, push random buttons!
It's okay to talk to inanimate objects, its when they talk back that you should be worried
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops On my desk; I have a work station...
When Life gives you lemons squirt them in Life's eyes!!
Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door
I'm one of those people who could perfectly understand Jack Sparrow's confusing rants and when your friends all had confounded expressions on their faces you were like, "well duh that made perfect sense"
If you know that GiroNatsu is meant to be, and wants to stick cacti in Saburo's eyes, copy and paste this into your profile.
GiroNatsu rocks my socks! Copy and paste this if you totally agree.
Natsumi and Giroro are meant to be together, Dang Saburo. Copy and Paste this to your profile if you agree with this.
Say NO to SabuNatsu and YES to GiroNatsu! If you agree Copy&Paste this to your profile.
If you know GiroNatsu beats the flippin' socks off SabuNatsu, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you know GiroNatsu beats the flippin' socks off Sabunatsu, copy and paste this onto your profile.
Natsumi and Giroro are meant to be together, dang Saburo. Copy and paste this to your profile if you agree.
GiroNatsu rocks my socks! Copy and paste this if you totally agree.
If you know that GiroNatsu is meant to be, and want to stick cacti in Saburo's eyes, copy and paste this into your profile.
Say NO to SabuNatsu and YES to GiroNatsu! If you agree Copy&Paste this to your profile.
If you're sick of saburo and want to punch him in his pretty-boy face, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you love The GiroroxNatsumi pairing to pieces, put this on your profile.
if you love how much giroro cares about Natsumi, copy and paste this onto your profile.
if you believe that natsumi should start returning the feelings Giroro has for her, copy and paste this to your profile.
if you are an EXTREME Saburo Basher, copy and paste this on your profile
if you hate Saburo with a burning passion, copy and paste this on your profile.
if you believe Saburo is the anime version of Justin Bieber ONLY WORST, copy and paste this on your profile
(NOTE: Don't read if you don't have a fanfiction)
This is really sweet...
When a girl is quiet, a million things are running through her mind.
When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply.
When a girl looks at you with her eyes full of question, she is wondering how long you will be around.
When a girl answers "I'm fine." after a few seconds, she is not fine at all.
When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying.
When a girl rests her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be her's forever.
When a girl wants to see you everday, she wants to be pampered.
When a girl says "I love you." she means it.
When a girl says "I miss you." nobody could miss you more than that.
Life only comes around once, so make sure you spend it with the right person.
Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, and calls you back when you hang up on him.
The guy who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead,
Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats.
The one who holds your hand in front of his friends and is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you there for him.
The one who turns to his friends and declares "That's her."
If you read this, you have to repost it, guy or girl, or you will have bad luck for the rest of your life.
If you repost this, in five minutes your true love will call or message you.
Tonight at midnight, they will realize that they love you.
Something good will happen at approximately 1:42 pm tomorrow, and it could happen anywhere.
So get ready for the biggest shock of your life.
If you don't repost this, you will be cursed with relationship problems for all of eternity.
Repost this to your profile, and spare yourself the emotional stress.
That whole thing reminded me of GiroNatsu!!
If you’ve a tendency to talk to yourself, copy this onto your profile.
If you’ve ever zoned out for more then five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.
If you’ve your own little world, copy this into your profile.
If you’ve ever pushed on a door that said pull, or vice versa, copy this into your profile.
If you’ve ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy this into your profile.
If you’ve ever said something that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy this into your profile!
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy this one your profile
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, copy this into your profile.
If you're the kind of person that gets really excited when you get a new review, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever been on the computer for hours on end OR pulled an all-nighter because you were reading fan fiction, copy this into your profile.
If you’re obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile
If you've ever cried when your favorite character in a book, movie, or TV show died, copy this into your profile. (KIKU!!! WAHHH)
8 of every 10 teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 who hasn't, copy this in your profile.
Do you know that the average American reads only three books a year? If you believe that it's not possible to read so little, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever walked into a wall before copy this into your profile.
If you ever fell off a chair backwards copy this into your profile.
If you have ever gone a REALLY long time without blinking copy this on your profile
If Fanfiction to you is what Myspace or Facebook is to other people, copy this into your profile.If you’re part of the .0000001 percent of people who don't have a MySpace, copy this into your profile.
If you’ve ever run into a window or glass door that you thought was an open doorway, copy this onto your profile.
If you've ever walked into a wall before copy this into your profile.
If you ever fell off a chair backwards copy this into your profile.
If you've ever slapped yourself and/or banged your head on a table for no reason copy this onto your profile.
If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingies, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!!
If you've read people's profiles looking for things to copy into your profile, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever copied something onto your profile, copy this onto your profile
If you haven't died yet, copy this onto your profile.
if you believe people should stop ignoring Dororo, copy and paste this to your profile.
if you believe Momoka should admit her true feelings for fuyuki, copy and paste this to your profile.
if you believe Fuyuki should just go out with Momoka, Copy and paste this to your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you are so obsessed with Keroro Gunso that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this into your profile
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile.
If your guilty pleasure is KeroNatsu when you are a GiroNatsu fan, copy and paste this on your profile
female come backs pick up line comebacks, add to it
Man: Where have you been all my life? Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living? Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you. Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd die laughing.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together. Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together.
Man: Going my way, babe? Woman: I'm going the other way, genius.
GIRLS REPOST THIS AS "female comebacks" GUYS REPOST THIS AS "don't let this happen
If you think being unique is cooler than being cool copy this into your profile.
98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this into your profile.
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, so weird is good.
If there are times when you want to annoy people just for the hell of it, copy this into your profile
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile
If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste.
Scientists have demoted the planet Pluto, saying it is too small. If you disagree with this copy and paste this statement on your profile and add your name to the list: Tanith of Pellinor, AngelxofxthexSoul, XxDeviantAngelxX, Archangel's Requiem,KurouKageTenshiFreedomfromrule, Aliengirl13
If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this to your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you said it, copy and paste
If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you've ever lost someone you loved, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself and/or someone else, copy this into your profile.
EMBRACE THE WEIRDNESS! If you embrace the weirdness, then copy and paste this on to your profile.
If you are odd and proud of it put this on your profile.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste.
If you have an extremely long profile, copy this into it to make it longer
(\School teacher of preschoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas season
emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that He grew up, etc So he asked his class
The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class.She called on him and said, "Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?"Little
Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures, tacked to a bulletin board, of the 10
Which way does a compass point in space?
You have the right to remain silent, anything you say will be misquoted and used against you.
An optimist is someone who falls off the empire state building and after 50 floors says "So far so good!"
If Fed ex and UPS merge, they would be called Fed UP.
I don't suffer from insanity - I enjoy every minute of it.
Never drink water...if it can rust iron, think of what it can do to your stomach.
Chaos, panic, pandemonium, my work here is done.
Scientists are complaining that the new Dinosaur movie shows dinosaurs with lemurs, who didn't evolve for another million years. They're afraid the
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
Your misery=My joy
In a dog-eat-dogworld the best thing to do is become a cat. If you think that I think that you think that I think that you think that I am totally spazzing out
If you think that if girls should rule the world and it would be a better place then copy this onto your profile.
If you have ever been watching a T.V show, and when the commercials came on you forgot what you were watching copy this into your profile.
If you have ever had a random song pop into your head at the most completely and utter worst time but you sing it anyway copy this into your profile.
You lie! You sit upon a throne of lies!
Surely you can't be serious!? I am serious... and don't call me Shirely.
I'ma firin my laza!
It is only fair to warn you that I am practiced in the ancient art of origami. Beware my paper swan.
The more you love someone,the more you want them dead.
And now I ask: what is wrong with worshipping anime characters?
It was an issue of religion that lead to our breakup. He thought he was God. I didn't.
Why is Donkey Kong called "DONKEY" Kong if he's a monkey?
If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?
364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from
Crazy is a relative term in my family!
I'm the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
How is it possible to have a civil war?
"Wal-Mart, do they like, sell walls there?" - Paris Hilton
When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.
I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.
I don't obsess! I think intensely.
All the good ones are either dating someone, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.
When French people swear do they say pardon my English?
Aren't the 'good things that come to those who wait' just the leftovers from the people that got there first?
If the SWAT team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?
I read Eclipse and wanted to punch Jacob Black REALLY REALLY HARD. Then Bella did it for me.
"Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat."
"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes."
"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most."
"An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed."
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound as they go by.
Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic...
Never do anything you don't want to explain to the paramedics
If it wasn't for physics and law enforcement I'd be unstoppable
Apparently 1 in 5 people are Chinese. There are five people in my familly so it must be one of them. It's ether my mum or dad. Or my older brother, Colin.
There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & and those that cant.
If you can stay calm when all around you is complete chaos, you probably haven't fully understood the situation.
Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.
There is no "I" in team but the is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM...
Don't you dare tell me the sky is the limit when there are footsteps on the moon.
People like you are the reason why we have middle fingers.
Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.
If dance were any easier, it would be called football.
Why do all superheroes wear spandex?
If mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?
Why did Mary own a little lamb?
If a missing person sees their picture on a milk carton that offers a reward, would they get the money?
If the president were gay, would his husband be the first man?
If you were a genie and a person asked you this wish, "I wish you would not grant me this wish" what would you do?
Why aren't safety pins as safe as they say they are?
If overalls are held up by the snaps at the top, then why do they have belt loops?
Why is it that its good to score under par in golf but its bad to be "under par" in any thing else?
One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.
You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it
My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.
Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.
Taste the rainbow- Eat CRAYONS
Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers. -
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, "Where the hell is the ceiling?!"
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.
Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.
I had a friend once, but then the rope broke and he got away.
Got a problem with me? Solve it.
Think I'm trippin'? Tie my shoe.
Can't stand me? Then sit down
Roses are red,
If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em.
How come we say 'It's colder than hell outside' when isn't it realistically always colder than hell since hell is supposed to be fire and brimstone?
Why is it that if something says, "do not eat" on the packaging it becomes extra tempting to eat?
Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?
Why are the commercials for cable companies on cable but not on regular television? Don't they want the people without cable to buy the cable?
In that song, She'll Be Coming 'Round the Mountain, who is "she"?
"Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?"
Can mute people burp?
What happens if you put this side up face down while popping microwave popcorn?
Why is chopsticks one of the easiest songs to play on the piano, but the hardest thing to eat with?
How come you play at a recital, but recite at a play?
If heat rises, then shouldn't hell be cold?
Why is there that little space inside strawberries, as if it was meant for a pit, and then the seeds are on the outside?
Why isn't chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa
Why do companies offer you "free gifts?" Since when has a gift NOT been
If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it?
You know the expression, "Don't quit your day job?" Well what do you say to
Why do you get in trouble for blocking an exit when you're standing in the doorway? In case of an emergency, wouldn't you run out, too,
Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?
It IS as bad as you think and they ARE out to get you.
Things that make you wonder
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
So what's the speed of dark?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops On my desk, I have a work station..
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
Should women put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to these men?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Why can't you find fresh sardines in the fish market?
Why do so many old people eat at cafeterias?
Why does an "X" stand for a kiss?
Why does the word "Filipino" start with the letter F ?
Why are the copyright dates on movies and television shows written in Roman numbers?
Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows 98?
Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
Who tastes dog food when it has a "new & improved" flavor?
Why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?
Why sheep don't shrink when it rains?
Why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is "Congress" the opposite of "progress"?
Why they call the airport "the terminal" if flying is so safe?
Why is it called common sense if it's so rare?
If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?
Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
On Sears hairdryer:
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
15 Things to do with friends when you're in Walmart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
15.Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Pikachu, I choose you!!"
"Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?" Anonymous
"Everyday is a gift, that's why they call it the present." Anonymous
"My mind works like lightning, one brilliant flash and it's gone." Anonymous
"If you know me, chances are you hate me." Anonymous
"Heaven doesn't want me and hell is afraid I'll take over." Anonymous
"When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back." Anonymous
"Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk and the rest of it telling us to sit and shut up." Anonymous
"Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it." Anonymous
"Sometimes, people just build walls up not to keep others out, but to see who cares enough to break through." Anonymous
"The cracks in the cement are a reminder that no matter how strong you may be, you can break." Anonymous
"Tragedy is when I cut my finger, Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die"- Mel Brooks
Top 75 Most Annoying Things To Do In An Elevator
When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
Call the Psychic Hot line from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor you're on.
Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.
Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.
Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.
Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
Ask, "Did you feel that?"
Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!"
Swat at flies that don't exist.
Tell people that you can see their aura.
Call out, "Group Hug!"and then enforce it.
Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"
Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"
Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.
Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.
Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on".
Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is MY personal space!"
Put police tape in front of the door before entering.
Fart loudly when there are only two of you in the elevator. Argue vehemently that it wasn't you.
Do the "potty dance" all the way to the elevator door. Upon arrival, sigh and look greatly relieved.
Throw a rave.
Place potted plants and water fountains at strategic locations in the lift. When people
ask what you are doing, tell them you "Won't ride an elevator that's not fung shwei."
Greet everyone getting on with a warm handshake and ask them to call you "Admiral".
Hum the first six notes of the "It's a small world" over and over again.
Lean over to another rider and whisper 'Noogie patrol coming!'"
Have a heated debate with yourself.
Bring a melon onto the elevator. Try to sell it to the other passengers.
Drum on every available surface.
Write a big X on the elevator floor, and hand out "pirate" maps to everyone as they enter.
Give psychotherapy to the other passengers.
Greet everyone coming on as if they were your best friend. Use the same name for all of them.
Say "ring ring," then pull a banana out of your pocket and start talking into it.
Propose to the other passengers.
Challenge people to duels.
Sell girl scout cookies.
Come on looking really scared, and say to another passenger..."I'm kinda nervous...this is my first time flying..."
Any time someone enters the doors, recoil in horror.
Shout "Food fight!"
Every time someone else talks, angrily shout: "Some people are trying to sleep here!"
When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
Lick one of the buttons. Tell the other passengers you're sick and tired of people stealing your food the second you turn your back.
Elevators were practically MADE for river dance!
Bring a snowboard onto the elevator. Put it on. Every time the lift goes up or down, shout "WOO-YEAH! This is what I call sick air!"
Every time the elevator goes down, loudly scream "OH MY GOD!! We're all gonna die! This is it! This is it! It's over! IT'S OVER!!"
Ask the other passengers if they want to see your glass clown collection.
Practice your kung fu.
Make race car noises when people get on and off.
Ask everyone on the elevator: "Are you my mother?"
Fly a model airplane.
Play the accordion
Enter the elevator with nothing on your head. Individually ask everyone if they like your hat.
Bring a rocking chair. Sit and knit.
Recite gangsta rap lyrics in monotone.
Enter with a shovel, and attempt to "dig for treasure."
Read "Green Eggs and Ham" at the top of your lungs. Sound out every word.
Allodoxaphobia- Fear of opinions.
Agateophobia- Fear of insanity.
Alliumphobia- Fear of garlic. (Vampires??)
Arachibutyrophobia- Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth.
Bibliophobia- Fear of books. -This would probably drive me to phobia listed above (Agateophobia-Fear of Insanity)
Chaetophobia- Fear of hair.
Chromophobia or Chromatophobia- Fear of colors. -That would seriously suck.
Dutchphobia- Fear of the Dutch. -Sorry Dutch people, but some people are afraid of you.
Anglophobia- Fear of England or English culture, etc.
Ephebiphobia- Fear of teenagers. -What can I say?
Ergophobia- Fear of work. -Sounds like a good excuse to me.
Gerontophobia- Fear of old people. -I just I can understand this one, I mean an old lady with crutches... shivers
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words. (Now this name is just mean!)
Euphobia- Fear of hearing good news. (Wow)
Nomatophobia- Fear of names.
Panophobia or Pantophobia- Fear of everything.
REMEMBER WHEN ..
A good or best friend!
A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"
A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."
A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?
A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.
A good friend will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. A best friend will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"
A good friend will offer you a soda. A best friend will dump theirs on you.
A good friend will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. A best friend will throw you a tampon and push you in.
A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"
A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.
A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"
A good friend has never seen you cry. A best friend won't tell anyone else that you cried...just laugh about it in private with you when you aren't down anymore.
A good friend asks you to write down your number. A best friend has you on speed dial.
A good friend will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. A best friend will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.
A good friend knows a few things about you. A best friend could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story.
A good friend tells you she knows how you feel. A best friend just sits down and cries.
A good friend will ask you why you are crying. A best friend is someone who wont say anything when you cry for no reason, but will start sobbing too, just help you cry.
A good friend won't repost this. A best friend already has this on their profile!
Unsafe External Link