Poll: Since I want to work on a one-shot side project, what TFP fic should I write? ( I know these are weird o.O ) Vote Now!
Author has written 11 stories for Transformers/Beast Wars, and Hetalia - Axis Powers.
Friends: Transformers4eva, transformerspup246 (Knockoutsgirl on DA), moshigal156, BlackFeather101, transformer333 on dA
BlackFeather101 and I are creating a story called 'Something Unexpected' It's on her profile!! Be sure to go check that out!! ;D
I play the violin.
I am left-handed.
User on deviantART is DuskWolfAtDawn. But on any site, please; call me Dwad. (Initials of DuskWolfAtDawn) Or Dawn, whichever you prefer. ;o;
It doesn't matter whether the glass is half empty or half full, just drink it and get it over with.
This world is full of crazy people. THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER!
I'm the kind of person that walks into a door and apologizes.
When life gives you lemons, make apple juice, then laugh while people try to figure out what you did.
This is Bob. Bob likes sharp things. I suggest you run from Bob.
You cry. I cry. You laugh. I laugh. You jump off a cliff. I laugh even harder.
If a fork is made of gold, will it still be called silverware?
Amateurs built the Ark. Professionals built the Titanic...
When life hands you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make it's own lemonade!
When life gives you lemons squirt them in life's eyes, then run far, far away.
364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, it's encouraged! Why is that?
An apple a day keeps the doctor away...if well aimed.
Parents spend the first parts of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Have you seen my sanity? I seem to have lost it.
Please Note: CHRISTMAS IS CANCELED. Apparently you told Santa that you have been good this year...he died laughing.
Come to the dark side. We have TWINKIES!
Education is important, school however, is another matter.
I am nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect!
I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every minute of it!
Slow and steady gets you trampled by other people.
Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss. (Not responsible for any injuries sustained from throwing self at floor.)
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
If you find yourself in a hole, here's a hint: Just. Stop. Digging.
Whoever said that nothing is impossible has clearly never tried to slam into a revolving door.
I'm not retreating; I'm just advancing in a different direction.
Boys are like trees – they take fifty years to grow up.
Don't knock on deaths door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.
They say guns don't kill people. People kill people. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled, "BANG!" i don't think you'd kill many people.
The trouble with real life is that there is no background music.
Forecast for tonight: darkness.
Eat healthy. Work right. Die anyway.
Have you considered suing your brain for non-support?
Boy break hearts so why don't we break their necks?
When life gives you skittles, throw them at hobos and scream "TASTE THE FREAKIN' RAINBOW!"
Some say the glass is half full, others the glass is half empty, all I want to know is who's drank my water!
Dear Math, Grow up and solve your own problems!
I didn't slap you, I high-fived you in the face.
Heaven doesn't want me, and Hell's afraid I'll take over.
The dinosaur's extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.
Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.
Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!
Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to these men?
Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we're already there?
It's you and me against the world...we attack at dawn
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'?
Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.
I live in my own little world- but it's ok, they know me there.
Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
Don't follow in my footsteps, I tend to walk into walls… and poles… and other stuff…
Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?
Therapist The/rapist... scary thought…
Tell the truth and run.
All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.
Don't ever attempt a staring contest with a brick wall, they cheat a lot.
Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary.
I'm not afraid of Death. What's he gonna do, kill me?
Duct tape is like The Force; it has a dark side, a light side and it holds the universe together.
Ninja farts: silent yet deadly.
Come to the Dark Side, we have Oreos! (and milk too!)
Get to know your stalker, they'll be there for a while.
My knight in shining amour turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.
When life gives you a lemon, throw the lemon back and demand chocolate
Engineering: 'How will this work?' Science: ‘Why will this work?' Management: 'When will this work? Liberal Arts: ‘Do you want fries with that?
God made man, and then he said, "I can do better than that," and made women.
Death is God's way of saying you're fired. Suicide is human’s way of saying you can't fire me, I quit.
Why do today what you could put off till tomorrow?
Don't mess with me I've got a stick.
I ran with scissors, and lived!
I'm the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
Stupidity can hurt, I broke a rib laughing at you
We should have thrown you in the dungeon years ago.
At last! My plans for world domination are complete!! MUAAHAHAHAHAHAA!!! Oh look, something shiny...must go look.
To put it nicely, I hope you choke.
I did what they say and chose the road less traveled...Now where the heck am I?
You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same.
I'm not clumsy, the floor just hates me.
I believe you should live each day as if it were your last, which is why I don't do my laundry. I mean, come on, who would wanna wash clothes on the last day of their life?
They laugh because we're losers . . . . We laugh because they just figured it out.
It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile, and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.
Why be difficult, when, with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?
Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!
I call things as I see them; If I didn't see them, I make them up!
Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.
List twelve of your favorite characters from your fandom, in no particular order.
1. Optimus Prime
11. Silas/Cylas (For variety)
12. Miko (For variety)
1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
Bumblebee/Cylas doesn't sound like such a good idea...especially since Silas took Bee's t-cog... o_o
2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
ASDFGHJKL YESH YESH YESH EYESH xWx
3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
Miko (WEIRD ALREADY) getting Starscream... AAAHHH PRIMUS I DAI DX
4. Can you recall any fics about Nine?
5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Smokescreen and Bumblebee? They'd be fine.
6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
Soundwave/Megatron or Soundwave/Arcee? Oooohh..that's a toughie ' Soundcee because...BECAUSE.
7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
Ratchet walking in on Smokescreen and Miko?!? Everyone would DIE.
8. Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
Breakdown and Arcee...hmm...
9. Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
10. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
Miko and Ratchet? ALREADY IT'S SCARY. Hmm... 'Just Because I'm Me'
11. Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
12. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
13. Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Smokescreen/Knockout/Soundwave...IS THERE ANYTHING MORE PERFECT?? XDD I guess..
14. If you wrote a Song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?
15. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?
16. When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
17. (1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (7) runs off with (4). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3).
What title would you give this fic?
18. How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
If 1 and 4 had a multi-dimensional war for you who would you choose?
10 wants to go on a date with you.
7 decides to let you and 9 be roommates.
5 and 10 are getting married.
1 asks you to be married to him/her while 2 is trying to be more than friends and 9 and 10 want you to marry 2.
4 tells 8 that 9 loves 7 and you love 3
2 gives you carrot cake for a lifetime
3 gives you a panda bear for Christmas
1 proposes to you on your birthday
7 and 10 become BFFs
6 and 1 are related
5 and 6 get in a fight who will win?
Would you make a story about 1 and 6
(\_/) I'm Bubbles.
If you are against fur coats or killing animals just to look good, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever pushed on a door that said pull, or vice versa, copy and paste this into your profile
If you wish writing fanfiction was a school subject, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you love to sadistically torture your favorite characters, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you think Writers' Block sucks, and should have a cure, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you are against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery, etc.) copy and paste this to your profile.
If you spend numerous hours each day reading and/or writing, copy and paste this to your profile.
98 percent of authors confuse 'your' with 'you're'. If you are one of the two percent that can tell them apart, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you realize that that copying and pasting things to your profile is completely pointless, but do it anyways, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you've ever walked into a door you could have clearly dodged, but weren't paying enough attention, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you've ever read/started reading a chapter on fanfiction, got side-tracked, and realized you forgot to review after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you're easily confused or confuzzled, copy and paste this to your profile
80 percent of Americans don't smoke. If you are one of that eighty percent, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you love chocolate as much as I do, copy and paste this to you profile.
If you have ever fallen UP the stairs, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you love rain, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have ever felt the urge to slam your head against something, whether it's an inanimate object or a person, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you've ever wondered who made the 'copy and paste this to your profile' thingies, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction, copy and paste this to your profile.
I'm bored. . . If you're bored, copy and paste this to your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy and paste this to your profile.
I'm a smidiot (smart-idiot) AND PROUD OF IT! If you are a smidiot, copy and paste this to your profile!
If you have ever slapped yourslef and/pr banged your head on a table, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you talk to yourself, copy and paste this to your profile
If you realize that many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that you have scared people with your obsession, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you think it would fun to be a cartoon, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you wish that a fictional character was real, copy and paste this to your profile.
I find the bible the best text book for science ever. If you find this true, copy and paste to your profile.
-If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.
-IF Y0U C4N UND3R574ND 7H15 M355463 C0PY 17 4ND P4573 17 1N70 Y0UR PR0F1L3.
-If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
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-If your profile is long, copy this onto it to make it even longer.
-Too many people have smoked marijuana. If you haven't, write this to your profile.
-If you love random copy and paste quotes, copy and paste this on your profile! ;-)
-If you have ever done anything stupid in your life, copy and paste this into your profile.
-If you are part of the .0000001 percent of people who don't have a MySpace and Facebook, copy this onto your profile.
-If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.
-If you think you cannot live without music, copy this into your profile.
-If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
-Copy and paste this on your profile if you think that some of the fanfics that you read should be made into a movie/cartoon episode of said movie/cartoon
-If you have a lot of fanfic ideas in your head but are unable to bring yourself to write them, copy and paste this onto your profile.
-If you've ever tried to lick your elbow and knew that it was physically impossible, copy this onto your profile.
-If you actually take the time to read other people's profiles, put this in yours.
-If you think that writing or reading Fanfic stories is fun, copy and paste this onto your profile.
-If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, put this on your profile.
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-If you have ever read a 250 pg book in less than one day, copy and paste this onto your profile
-If you squeal/nyah/make any high pitched noise after seeing something really, really cute, copy and paste this onto your profile
-If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that needs to exist, PLEASE copy and paste this onto your profile
-If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this onto your profile.
-If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word and you do at random moments, copy and paste this onto your profile
-If you have added the names of characters of any anime/game/ect. to your word dictionary because you were getting sick of seeing that stupid red squiggly line all over the place while writing fanfiction, copy and paste this onto your profile.
-If you're a fangirl and freakin' proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
-If you have a tendency to talk to your self, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile
If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile
If you talk back to the TV, copy this into your profile.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile
If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever laughed during a really sad part of a movie, copy and paste this to your profile.
98 percent of teens can walk without running into walls. If you're in the 2 percent that can't, post this in your profile.
If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you enjoy copying and pasting these copy and paste thingies, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you find yourself making fanfictions of other fanfictions in your head, post this in your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.
Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!
If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile.
No one's perfect. If you know and like that your not perfect, Copy this to your profile.
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy and paste this in your profile. ( Is there any other way? o.O )
If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile
If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
-If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy and paste this onto your profile!
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If you are against fur coats or killing animals just to look good, copy this into your profile.
Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile.
Fifteen things to do if you're in Walmart
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "We have a Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. Go into the auto department and practise your "Madonna" look.
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
15.Grab alot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!"
Annoying things to do on an elevator:
1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it
Kids Are Quick
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
TEACHER: Glen, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In".
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
8. Don't use any punctuation.
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.
Re-post this and spread the stupidity!
60 WAYZ TO ORDER PIZZA!
1. If using a touch-tone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.
2. Make up a charge-card name. Ask if they accept it.
3. Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.
4. Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."
5. Tell the order taker a rival pizza place is on the other line and you're going with the lowest bidder.
6. Give them your address, exclaim, "Oh, just surprise me!" and hang up.
7. In your breathiest voice, tell them to cut the crap about nutrition and ask if they have something outlandishly sinful.
8. Tell them to put the crust on top this time.
9. Sing the order to the tune of your favorite song from Metallica's Master of Puppets CD.
10. Do not name the toppings you want. Rather, spell them out.
11. Put an extra edge in your voice when you say "crazy bread."
12. Ask for a deal available somewhere else. (e.g., If phoning Domino's, ask for a Cheeser! Cheeser!)
13. Ask what the order taker is wearing.
14. Crack your knuckles into the receiver.
15. Say hello, act stunned for five seconds, then behave as if they called you.
16. Rattle off your order with a determined air. If they ask if you would like drinks with that, panic and become disoriented.
17. Tell the order taker you're depressed. Get him/her to cheer you up.
18. Change your accent every three seconds.
19. Order 52 pepperoni slices prepared in a fractal pattern as follows from an equation you are about to dictate. Ask if they need paper.
20. Start your order with "I'd like. . .". A little later, slap yourself and say, "No, I don't."
21. If they repeat the order to make sure they have it right, say, "Okay, that'll be $10.99; please pull up to the first window."
22. Rent a pizza.
23. Ask if you get to keep the pizza box. When they say yes, heave a sigh of relief.
24. Put the accent on the last syllable of "pepperoni." Use the long "i" sound.
25. Have your pizza "shaken, not stirred."
26. Move the mouthpiece farther and farther from your lips as you speak. When the call ends, jerk the mouthpiece back into place and scream GOODBYE at the top of your lungs.
27. Tell them to double-check to make sure your pizza is, in fact, dead.
28. Imitate the order taker's voice.
29. Eliminate verbs from your speech.
30. When they say, "What would you like?"--say, "Huh? Oh, you mean now."
31. Say it's your anniversary and you'd appreciate if the deliverer hid behind some furniture waiting for your spouse to arrive so you can surprise him/her.
32. Ask to see a menu.
33. Say you'll be able to pay for this when the movie people call back.
34. Ask what topping goes best with well-aged Chardonnay.
35. Order a slice, not a whole pizza.
36. Doze off in the middle of the order, catch yourself, and say, "Where was I? Who are you?"
37. Ask what the pizza place's phone number is. Hang up, and call again.
38. Order two toppings, then say, "No, they'll start fighting."
39. Tell the order taker to tell the manager to tell his supervisor he's fired.
40. Ask for the guy who took your order last time.
41. Start the conversation with "My Call to Pizza Place, Take 1, and. . . action!"
42. Ask if the pizza is organically grown.
43. Ask about pizza maintenance and repair.
44. Be vague in your order.
45. When they repeat your order, say, "Again, with a little more OOMPH this time."
46. If using a touch-tone press 9-1-1 every 5 seconds throughout the order.
47. Start the conversation by reciting today's date and saying, "This may be my last entry."
48. Ask if they would like to sample your pizza. Suggest an even trade.
49. Put them on hold.
50. Teach the order taker a secret code. Use the code on all subsequent orders.
51. Make the first topping you order mushrooms. Make the last thing you say, "No mushrooms, please." Hang up before they have a chance to respond.
52. When the order is repeated, change it slightly. When it is repeated again, change it again. On the third time, say, "You just don't get it, do you?"
53. When you're given the price, say, "Ooooooo, that sounds complicated. I hate math."
54. Order term life insurance.
55. When they say, "Will that be all?"--snicker and say, "We'll find out, won't we?"
56. Ask how many dolphins were killed to make that pizza.
57. While on the phone, fake entering puberty. Fluctuate pitch often; act embarrassed.
58. Dance all around the word "pizza." Avoid saying it at all costs. If (s)he says it, say, "Please don't mention that word."
59. Order a steamed pizza.
60. If any of the above practices are rejected by the order taker, say, in your best pouty voice, "Last guy let me do it."
Female come backs pick up line comebacks
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."
Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."
Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."
Repost if your happily single!
When I was a puppy, I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh. You called me your child, and despite a number of chewed shoes and a couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend. Whenever I was "bad," you'd shake your finger at me and ask, "How could you?" -- but then you'd relent and roll me over for a belly rub.
My housebreaking took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together. I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed and listening to your confidences and secret dreams, and I believed that life could not be any more perfect.
We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because "ice cream is bad for dogs" you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day.
Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate. I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you about bad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love.
She, now your wife, is not a "dog person" -- still I welcomed her into our home, tried to show her affection, and obeyed her. I was happy because you were happy. Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement. I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them, too. Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate.
Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a "prisoner of love." As they began to grow, I became their friend. They clung to my fur and pulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigated my ears, and gave me kisses on my nose. I loved everything about them and their touch -- because your touch was now so infrequent -- and I would've defended them with my life if need be. I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams, and together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway. There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me.
These past few years, you just answered "yes" and changed the subject. I had gone from being "your dog" to "just a dog," and you resented every expenditure on my behalf. Now, you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets. You've made the right decision for your "family," but there was a time when I was your only family
I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter. It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness. You filled out the paperwork and said, "I know you will find a good home for her." They shrugged and gave you a pained look. They understand the realities facing a middle-aged dog, even one with "papers." You had to pry your son's fingers loose from my collar, as he screamed "No, Daddy Please don't let them take my dog!" And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life.
You gave me a good-bye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you. You had a deadline to meet and now I have one, too. After you left, the two nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago and made no attempt to find me another good home. They shook their heads and asked, "How could you?" They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow. They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago. At first, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you that you had changed your mind -- that this was all a bad dream... or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me.
When I realized I could not compete with the frolicking for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate, I retreated to a far corner and waited. I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day, and I padded along the aisle after her to a separate room. A blissfully quiet room. She placed me on the table and rubbed my ears, and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. The prisoner of love had run out of days. As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which she bears weighs heavily on her, and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood. She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago. She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured, "How could you?" Perhaps because she understood my dog speak, she said, "I'm so sorry."
She hugged me, and hurriedly explained it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn't be ignored or abused or abandoned, or have to fend for myself -- a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place. And with my last bit of energy, I tried to convey to her with a thump of my tail that my "How could you?" was not directed at her.
It was directed at you, My Beloved Master, I was thinking of you. I will think of you and wait for you forever. May everyone in your life continue to show you so much loyalty.
Put this on your profile if it touched your heart.
Warrior Cats fan Oath
I'll remember Brightheart, When I see a scar one someone's face, I will think of WindClan, When I win a race, I'll remember Silverstream, When I see a young mother, I'll remember Violet, When I worry about my brother, I will remember Goosefeather, When nobody believes me, I will think of Scourge, When someone's teased for being tiny, I'll remember Mothwing, When I find it hard to believe, I'll be reminded of Princess, When I see someone, who seems naive. I'll always think of Heathertail, When someone wants to be 'just friends', I will think of StarClan, When I am near the end, I will think of Tawnypelt, Whenever I feel judged, I will think of Darkstripe, When somebody holds a grudge. I promise to remember Cinderheart, When I climb a tree, I'll remember Midnight, Whenever I'm at sea, I'll remember Leafpool, When I must follow my heart, I will think of Hollyleaf, If I ever fall apart, I'll remember Brambleclaw, When I must prove myself, I'll remember Spottedleaf, When I'm suffering from bad health, I'll remember Lionblaze, When I am feeling strong, I'll remember Tigerstar, If I choose the path that's wrong, I'll remember Dovewing, When I hear of something far away, I'll remember Cloudtail, When a kitten catches their first prey, I'll remember Bluestar, Whenever I must choose, I'll remember Crowfeather, When the one I love, I loose, Feathertail will be in my mind, Whenever I must be brave, And I'll remember The Tribe, When I'm in a cave, I'll remember Ashfur, When somebody breaks my heart, I'll remember Barley, When me and my siblings are far apart, I'll remember Ivypool, When I try to be the best, I'll remember Firestar, When my loyalty's put to the test, I'll remember Crookedstar, If someone abandons me, I'll remember Ravenpaw, If I ever have to flee, I'll remember Jayfeather, When I have a strange dream, I'll think of Cherrytail and Sparrowpelt, Whenever I eat cream, I'll always think of Cinderpelt, When my leg is sore, I'll remember Longtail, When I can see no more, I'll remember the many battles, When I see conflict or strife, I promise to remember all these cats, For the rest of my life.
Footprints In the Sand:
One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord. Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky. In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand. Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, other times there were one set of footprints.
This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat, I could see only one set of footprints.
So I said to the Lord, “You promised me Lord, that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life there have only been one set of footprints in the sand. Why, when I needed you most, you have not been there for me?”
The Lord smiled and replied, “The times when you have seen only one set of footprints in the sand, is when I carried you.”
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Girl: Do you like me?
Girl: Do you want me?
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Girl: Would you live for me?
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says... The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind. The reason why I don't like you is because I love you. The reason I don't want you is because I need you. The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left. The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you. The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you. The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life. If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste this into your profile.
A girl and her boyfriend were speeding over 150kmp/h on a motorcycle.
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love.
(Gotten from snowflake1814's profile)
Old man walks up to the Tortuga, and knocks on the door.
Martin; *opens door yawning* Ugh... You know it's like 7:00 in the morning, right?
Man; *hands Martin a big wheel of cheese* Here. Take cheese.
Martin; *blinks* What? huh? Why are you giving me cheese at 7:00 in the morning??? O_O
Man; Sorry, I do not speak English. You're welcome. *starts walking away*
Martin; BUT I DON'T WANT ANY CHEESE! DX'
Man; Yes, I love you too, g'dbye! *walks away*
Martin; ... 0.0' Okay... I need to get back to sleep...
Repost this if you DARE!
Getting HIGH meant swinging on a playground?
PUT THIS IN YOUR PROFILE IF YOU'RE STILL 5 INSIDE-NO MATTER WHAT AGE YOU ARE! ;D
STUPID THINGS I'VE DONE (Bold is what I actually did)
1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
58/100... That means something.. XDD
Justin Bieber falls off a building. 90% of the girls are crying. 9% are watching while eating popcorn. 1% are pushing Justin off the building. If you are part of that 1%, copy and paste this into your profile.
Random Transformers facts (Most from Dragonstormgirl's profile; she's awesome!! Be sure to check her out sometime):
FIRRIB: This uncommonly known fact is that during the old '80s show, Rumble and Frenzy were supposed to have their colors switched, Rumble was supposed to be red and black while Frenzy was supposed to be blue. No one really knows HOW it happened, but it most likely was a miscommunication between the script writers and animators. There is still a debate running about which is which though. Btw, FIRRIB stands for Frenzy Is Red, Rumble Is Blue, while the opposite, RIRFIB means Rumble Is Red, Frenzy Is Blue.
Peace Hunter: Optimus Prime's original name, Orion Pax means Peace Hunter. Orion was a hunter from Greek mythology, while Pax is Latin for peace. Makes you wonder if that was on purpose or not.
It IS cannon for Prime Soundwave to have a face! Don't believe me? Take a look on his page on TFWiki.net. Go to the Soundwave WFC page and scroll down to the Titan Magazines Prime Comics section. There is a picture of Soundwave WITHOUT HIS MASK! I have heard that it was a mistake, but its as close to canon as we're gonna get. Still, THERE IS PROOF OF HIS FACE!!!
Knock Out: TFP Knock Out's name was originally going to be Knockout, but in the end, they changed his name to Knock Out. That's how they spell it in the credits. (But I, however, spell it 'Knockout' just because ;D)
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! Tihs is anmazig!
When you carry a Bible, the devil gets a headache.
If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says, 'If you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven'
I am a Christian.
Professor : You are a Christian, aren’t you, son?
Jesus had no servants, yet they called him Master...
He had no degree, yet they called him Teacher...
He had no medicine, yet they called him Healer...
He had no army, yet kings feared him...He won no military battles, yet he conquered the World...
He committed no crime, yet they crucified Him...
He was buried in a tomb, yet He lives today
I feel honored to serve such a leader who loves us...
Christian and Proud