Hello all, I'm Wither and wane.
Sexual Orientation: Gay, my mom was very supportive so shout out to her! My dad on the other hand... lets just say the phone call ended with me hanging up on him.
School status: College Senior, Forensic Chemistry
Current Location: Ohio
Religion: none, I'm agnostic. But I respect other Religions. I actually think they are very important.
Hobbies: FanFiction, Videogames, Martial Arts, Thinking (sometimes I just like to think), and helping others
Loves: animals, Winter, Spyro the Dragon series, Pokémon, Hollow Knight, Dark Souls(1-3), Naruto, FMA, Blue Exorcist, Bleach, Seven Deadly Sins, Kill La Kill, Gurren Lagan, Psychonauts, My Little Pony FIM, Regular Show, Bones(the show), Romantic Fanfictions(K-M), Science, Math, Spanish, and my boyfriend.
Hates: Religious Zealots, People who disrespect other Religions, Bullies, Outgoing Homophobes, Margaret(from Regular Show), When people don't care(it just irritates me), the N-word, the anti-gay F-word.
Favorite book: The Art of Racing in the Rain (by Garth Stein)
Favorite Author: Deathsia, her fictions got me interested in the FanFiction site
First FanFiction I read: Pikachu's Unexpected Love (by Deathsia)
I have been through a lot, to the point that suicide was a reasonable option. I was harassed and bullied, among other things, for the first 16 years of my life. I had no friends, and nobody really cared. Plus a few other things I' d rather not talk about. I spent many nights crying myself to sleep and asking God why he was making my life hell.
However, I'm glad it all happened.
I can now look at the world without bias, or at least I try to. I think about both sides of every argument, issue, or event. And these are a few discoveries I've made:
1. No two people are the same. So everyone will experience an event differently. You should take care in these situations with friends, and know that if your in a situation that they may not know what to do.
2. You should never feel bad for feeling a certain way, because that's just the way you feel. Anger and jealousy are normal, and not talking to someone about it isn't good for you. Let it out to someone you trust.
3. If you have the chance to willingly cause pain, you have the chance to do nothing. Instead of being cruel, be neutral. Walk away. Say nothing. Do nothing. It ends the cycle of hate.
4. If something is bothering you, but you think it's just you, or it's not important, then talk to someone about it. It's important to you, no matter how small it may be. And while it might not be something worth starting a war over, it should be considered wrong to talk to a friend about it.
5. If you can't find a friend to talk to, talk to yourself. Saying something out loud, even to yourself, can really help you feel better. If you're mad, tell yourself what made you mad and why. Talk it out. Maybe you'll find you were being irrational. Or, if it's still bothering you, now you've had a chance to calm down and create a rational, non-emotional argument.
6. You never know what is happening in another person's life. So if someone does something that bother's you. Take a moment to think about what that person might have been feeling instead of condemning them. What if the person who cut you off on the Highway/ Motorway was rushing to the hospital? What if their late to work due to reason's out of their control and could get fired? Try to understand first. It makes it so you have less enemies.
7. The world is grey. Not black and white. There are very few times where something is only good or only bad. Take the time to look at the other side. Don't let yourself be ignorant. You might learn something that changes your point of view.
8. Talk. We have mouths for more then eating. Staying silent keeps your voice inside. Don't let yourself grow mute, but don't use your voice as sword. As humans, we thrive on conflict, to the point where we can build walls to keep a conflict going. Use your voice as a mediator. Break down the walls instead of reinforcing them. We need to work together as humans.
9. Race needs to stop. It's a wall meant to segregate and judge people based on the color of their skin. I mean instead of black and white, why can't we just be people? Why do we need the tag? Why do have to have a color that gives you a preconception about me before I say a word to you? It's ridiculous.
10. A thing isn't inherently anything. Nothing is inherently offensive. Nothing is inherently good or bad. Intent is the truth of an action's nature. If someone does something with the express intent of causing harm, then it's probably bad thing. But just because someone does something you, your friends, or society finds offensive for a vague reason like racism or sexism, it doesn't mean the person did something wrong. Context is key. Intent is truth.
I just want people to think. Don't let emotions drive your actions. Think before you act. Let logic help you make a decision you won't regret later. We all hold the power to make incredible change, but we need to be careful. One hurtful sentence. One cruel comment. One angry rant. One moment is all it takes to cause pain. Nobody deserves to be hurt.
But, this all comes at a price.
I grant you this insight so you don't suffer like I do to obtain it. I hope you never have to fear encountering a lifelong friend because you might say something that will make them leave forever. I hope you never worry that you drop the cake and ruin someone's birthday. I hope you never have to weigh the pros and cons of seeing a family member you don't want to see to the point where you cry. I hope you never cry yourself to sleep because you didn't when your dog died three years ago. I hope you never talk to the point where you ruin the conversation. I endure the price for my mind. An answer is never "yes" or "no". I wish for a day that I wouldn't think. That war, racism, hate, work, school, people, and every other source of stress in my life meant nothing to me. I want a day where I just...exist. A day that I am alive and that's all. A day of nothing but peace.
Knowledge comes from seeking an understanding of the world in all of it's aspects. This comes from thinking critically about events and experiences you have. Knowledge is important, without it we are nothing but feeble minded followers, but don't let it consume you. I want people to think as much as I want them to be happy. But I'm not sure if you can have both all the time. Try to strike a balance. We need thinkers in the world, but they deserve happiness the same as everyone else. Please. don't let it take away the joy the world brings. Use it as a tool, don't let it use you as an engine. Take a moment now. I want you to think about something or someone that makes you happy. Don't think about why. Just be glad they make you happy. I lost control by trying to figure out why things made me happy. I'm blessed with people that can bring me back from the chasm of my mind so I can keep helping the world change. I can't imagine life without them. They are my friends, my family, my lover, they know how to stop the tsunami of thoughts that plague my brain. If by some chance any of you are reading this. You are proof that there is a god. Thank you.