Author has written 1 story for Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney.
(NEWS UPDATE BECAUSE I SAID SO, AND NOTHING ELSE IN MY LIFE NEEDS ATTENTION AT THE MOMENT)
Well, I just decided to update my profile after I dunno. . .four months? The thought alone had been making my heart race and my face explode in red for a long time. I'm honestly really, really mortified in the uncomfortable way about this.
I also deleted the A/N attached to that - hideous, disgraceful, shit-fest - Turnabout Reset THING. Because I'm officially embarrassed enough to not want anyone to care why I'm embarrassed. Woo hoo, I'm just bringing in that fucking logic.
Do you remember everything I said on my profile before running away like a scared little bitch? I remember. I actually saved the document, printed it, and kept it safely in a drawer to always remind myself what low and miserable point I've reached.
I meant everything. EVERYTHING. I truly, completely, to the holy Heaven itself, HATE everything I've written. I've never felt hate before, and it scares me. But at the same time, I can't think of any other way to feel about the stories. I don't know why anyone on the whole earth would like them, and I'm so sorry to everyone them; you deserved something better than what was received.
Seeing as I haven't found an appropriate rock to hide under and rot in embarrassment (I'm still looking, don't worry!), have you noticed these not censored curses? Yeah, I curse when I'm in a lower than shit mood and I feel horrible about it. But what else can I fucking do? Pretend I'm happy? I'm not happy.
I'm definitely not happy. . .
I know this is going to sound really lame and laughable, but I've cried more than once. Over what? THESE STORIES. YES. -Falls face first into desk- TEARS. SHED. OVER. RECEAVING. ENCOURAGING. COMMENTS. OR. GENERAL. REVIEWS. HELL. EVEN. SEEING. THEM. IN. MY. LIST.
I don't know why I cried, I guess the overwhelming emotions? I dunno. It's weird to me because two things I practically never do in real life is swear and cry. I can get angry to Hulk levels, but not swear or cry. How does that even work? I would give someone my good leg for an answer, but something tells me I will never receive one.
I'm tired of this. Fuck. These. Feels. I'm tired of being emo, swearing, whining, avoiding people in my life, being jealous, lying around in a pool of tears, bleh. I don't want to live like this!
But what can I do? I've been doing this for months, maybe even since Turnabout Reset started getting views and all of that horror.
I can't promise if I'll write again, but instead of waiting for a poll to get answered I'm just going to delete my stories. There will be no more Requests And Romance or Stormy Nights, no Picture Perfect Turnabout and On Break. Nothing of the sort. They're all burning in hell, baby. Rightfully so, if I may be so bold.
The only thing I'm keeping is Turnabout Reset. As weird as it sounds, I don't feel like I can delete my worst enemy and toss it into hell. That would be taking the easy way out, and if you know me personally then. . .you'd know I like to make things overly-complicated! ; D
Turnabout Reset is staying because it, and it alone, symbolizes how my writing went to hell and came back a traumatized shell of itself. Because, oh it seems harmless at first glance. . .but then bad morals and general nonsense come into play. Fuck canon monstrosities like the phantom, Dahlia, Kristoph, ect, THIS is pure ungodly wreckage.
Turnabout Reset sickens me thoroughly, but there's no way to overcome the beast if it is merely deleted. If I ever lose sanity further and write again, I'm going to put so much effort into my work and do whatever it takes to bash the living hell out of this and THEN delete it. It could take years of suffering, but I can't quit. Fuck me, I just don't know when to quit after a large beating to the sanity!
Apollo, Klavier, Phoenix, Trucy, Ema, I am deeply sorry you were inserted into my stories. I say this to these guys because let's face it: I can't write anyone else to save my ass, and no one cares if Apollo is out of character.
Above all else, I'm deeply sorry to you people. . .the ones who read my stories or have done in the past. I'm so sorry! I can't remove what horrors you've seen, and I can't think of anything else to do but apologize! Really, truly, sorry! I'm sooooooooooo sooooooooooo sorry for writing in general! Fuck me, I'm sniffling and I swear I'm throwing my computer from my window if I let a tear get out again.
-Sigh- Well. . .that's my rant for the time being. My cheeks are red as all the blood gathering there, my vision is blurring with tears, and my heart's endurance is certainly being tested. I feel horrible, sound horrible, ect.
Go ahead: laugh your ass off. I bet everyone around the world is already doing that because they've read my stories. I'm just embarrassing myself further, so you should. . .I dunno. . .make this a drunk story to tell to friends at a reunion party, or something. I'll be over here. . .suffering. . .
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