Author has written 3 stories for Sherlock, Doctor Who, and Harry Potter.
Hello peoples! This is my profile.
Before I go any further: I am a mad woman with a box, a broom, a hoverboard, 38 random ingredients, a gedway ignaisia, a chameleon, and a pin that turns into a sword.
Please excuse any and all mistakes in grammar and brit-picking, because i am the only one working on my stories. No beta, nuffin.
Right now I am completely and utterly obsessed with the BBC version of Sherlock Holmes. (living, thinking, dreaming, breathing etc...)
A few more vague things about myself: I am between the ages of 12 and 19 and I live in the US of A... but I guess the header already says that so, oh well
Other things I may eventually get around to writing about (but no guarantees)(and not in any particular order):
1. Harry Potter
2. Percy Jackson/Heroes of Olympus
4. Hunger Games
5. 39 Clues
7. Inheritance Cycle
10. The Hobbit
11. Doctor Who
...and possibly some crossovers of those listed (HP/Sherlock likely first)
Also- a bit about my stories:
The Empty House:
My version of series 3 episode 1, and adapted very closely to the original canon (The Adventure of The Empty House) but it is in no way the real thing. Seeing as they have released the actual title (The Empty Hearse) I am going to try to finish it before series 3 comes out, whenever that is. (wish me luck!)
Return to 221b:
W 221b format Oneshot drabble about an imagining of mine of how The Return is going to be. Not connected to anything. (I have a lot of these and I may get around to posting summaries...or something...)
What it says on the can; very tiny story about a young River Song (if that makes any sense whatsoever)
"I'm not a psychopath, I'm a high functioning sociopath; do your research."
"You took your time."
"Yeah, I didn't get the shopping."
"What? Why not?"
"Because I had a row...in the shop...with a chip and PIN machine!"
"You had a row with a machine?"
"Sort of. It sat there and I shouted abuse at it."
-Sherlock Holmes and John Watson
"Looked a bit of a weirdo if you ask me. They usually are, these vigilante types...What are you looking at?"
"Yeah, well, apparently it's against the law to chin the Chief Superintendent."
-Chief Superintendent, Sherlock Holmes and John Watson
"This is my timey wimey detector. it goes ding when there's stuff."
"Bow ties are cool."
"I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them."
"We're all gonna die .. but I got a helmet."
"Procrastinators unite ... tomorrow."
"If at first you don't succeed, figure out what made you fail and kill it."
"When someone says I forbid it, that's a good sign it's worth doing."
“Duct tape is like the force, it has alight side and a dark side and it holds the universe together.”
“The good news: I was right. The better news: You were wrong.” -- Anonymous
"Any idiot can do the right thing. You know what's hard? Doing the right thing when you've been hardwired to do the wrong one!' -Dan Cahill
“Some people are like slinkies, they're good for nothing, but they sure make you laugh when you push 'em down a flight of stairs.” -Anonymous
“People who say anything is possible, haven't tried to slam a revolving door.”
“Hate: A special kind of love we give to people who suck.”
“Once you go fangirl you can never go back.”
“Every now and then I announce “I know you’re listening!” to empty rooms.”
“I prefer to be the noisiest thing in my environment, thank you very much.”
“From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put.”
"Which team are you on; team Edward or team Jacob?"
"Team Guy-Who-Almost-Hit-Bella-With-A-Car. Too bad he didn't succeed."
-a random person and Cleverbot
“Sick of tea?! That’s like being sick of breathing!”
"Dear bespectacled dark-haired friend and ginger friend,
Just finished reading Harry Potter series. On a completely unrelated note, I also figured out why we get all those weird stares when we hang out together...
Sincerely, Your bushy-haired, bookworm friend"
"I reject your reality and substitute my own"
1. Russel Brand
2. Noel Fielding (please don't ask; my dad loves the mighty boosh)
3. Penn & Teller
4. James Corden
5. Christopher Eccleston
6. David Tennant
7. Catherine Tate
8. Matt Smith
9. Karen Gillan
10. Jensen Ackles
11. Jared Padaleki
3. Josh Sundquist
4. vsauce (x3)
6. Vi Hart
7. 0nlyhands (that's a zero btw)
please note that people included in previous sections are also included in others, just not typed in... 'cause I'm lazy...
OH YES I can't forget:
Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman
Amazing (and attractive) actors, and in my opinion, the best Holmes and Watson the 21st century has ever seen. (and dragon and hobbit- :-) wat? i'm a fangirl.)
Anyways, hope you enjoy my stories!
and now all of my c&p things:
90 rules for Hogwarts
1. No matter how good an Australian accent I can do, I will not do my Steve Irwin imitation during Care of Magical Creatures
2. I will not use Umbridge's quill to write "I told you I was hardcore."
3. If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm
4. Seamus Finnigan is not after me Lucky Charms
5. I will not ask Lupin if it is his time of the month
6. I am not allowed to take Professor Flitwick's wand, hold it over my head, and laugh while he tries to reach it.
7. Asking "How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense?" and walking away is only funny the first time
8. I will not offer to pose nude for Colin Creevey
9. Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda
10. I will not refer to hypogriffs as "Horseybird"
11. Crucifixes do not ward off Slytherins and I should not test that
12. Professor Snape does not respond well to being called "Snookums"
13. Neither does he respond favorably to being called "Sev," "Snapey-poo," or "Debbie"
14. Dumbledore is not Santa, he does not wish for me to sit on his knee and demand presents, especially in June
15. I will not greet Professor McGonagall with "what's new pussy cat?"
16. I will not refer to "the Grim" as a nice doggy
17. I will not refer to Professor Lupin as a nice doggy
18. There is no bring a muggle to school day
19. When I apply for a job at the Ministry of Magic after graduating, I should not cite Fred and George Weasley as my greatest influence at Hogwarts
20. Citing Lord Voldemort probably isn't the best idea either
21. I will not refer to the accio charm as "The Force"
22. I will not sing "Defying Gravity" during Quidditch practice
23. There is no connection between Hitler and Voldemort
24. I am not allowed to declare an official hug a Slytherin day
25. I am not to wear my DEATH EATER AND PROUD OF IT! shirt to school
26. When in the presence of the Dark Lord, I will call him the Dark Lord not, "Snake face the Dark Lord Happy Pants."
27. I am not allowed to ask any of the Malfoys if it's true that blondes have more fun
28. I am not to sing "We're off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz!" when sent to the headmaster's office
29. I am not to hold my wand in the air before casting spells and shout "I..GOT...THE...POWER!"
30. When the Death Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I am not to point to the Dark Mark and yell "To the Batmobile, Robin!"
31. Or, "Thunder Thunder Thunder THUNDERCATS GO!"
32. I am not Voldemort's illegitamate love child
33. If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than fifteen seconds, I am to assume I'm not allowed to do it
34. I do not have a Cyberman Patronus
35. Calling the Ghostbusters is a cruel joke to play on the resident ghosts and poltergeists
36. Taking red paint and writing creepy messages on the wall is not funny either
37. I will not use the Slytherin and Gryffindor first years as Christmas decorations
38. Using the Engorgio charm on certain parts of the anatomy is not permitted on school grounds, even for entertainment purposes.
39. It is generally accepted that cats and dragons can't interbreed and I should not attempt to disprove this theory, not matter how wicked the result would be.
40. I will not write all my essays in red ink claiming it's blood
41. It's not appropriate to approach Cho wearing an "All the Good Looking Ones Die Young" t-shirt with a picture of Cedric Diggory on it
42. The Easter Bunny is not Jesus's Animagus form
43. I will not write forged letters home to the parents of Muggleborn children detailing the Satanic rituals they are learning.
44. Locking Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter in a closet together to see if they have hot gay sex is not appropriate
45. The four houses are not the Morons, the Borons, the Smartasses and the Junior Death Eaters
46. Teaching the first years to chorus in unison "the amazing bouncing ferret" whenever they hear the name Draco Malfoy is just wrong, funny, but wrong.
47. No matter what I say to the Dark Lord, I will never make him laugh
48. Murmuring "I see dead people" whenever I see one of the ghosts is stupid and was never funny
49. I will not replace Professor Snape's pumpkin juice with Skele-Gro, and it was not an honest mistake
50. I am not funny, no matter how much I make myself laugh
51. The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball
52. I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter
53. I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick
54. I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar
55. I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 ball to Divinition
56. I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this year's Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It is tasteless, tacky, and not a good money making strategy.
57. I am not allowed to make light saber noises with my wand.
58. I am not allowed to give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals
59. I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucigenic mushrooms is and Extra Credit Herbology Project.
60. I am not allowed to use my socks to make the Slytherin House mascot.
61. I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and make bets about which house comes out alive
62. I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast
63. I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways
64. It is not necessary to yell "BURN!" everytime Snape takes points away from the Gryffindors
65. I will not use the phrase "Get a life" when talking to Voldemort
66. First years are not to be fed to Fluffy
67. I will not ask Harry Potter if his Voldie senses are tingling
68. I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning Myrtle an eye-full"
69. I will not make "OMGWTF" a spell
70. It is not necessary to yell "BAM" everytime I Apparate
71. I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways, not even on Halloween.
72. I will not poke Hufflepuff's with a plastic spoon, nor will I say that their colors suggest that they're covered in bees
73. "I've heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge
74. House elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers
75. I will not start every Potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion
76. I will not call the Weasley twins "bookends.''
77. I will not give Luna Lovegood Coast to Coast AM transcripts
78. I do not have an Edward Cullen Patronus
79. I will not lick Trevor
80. Gryffindor courage doesn't come in bottles labeled "Firewhiskey"
81. I will not dress up as Voldemort for Halloween
82. It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself to seriously
83. I will not tell Sir Cadogan the the Knights Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel and have all students say "Ni" from all directions
84. I am not King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet
85. "To conquer the earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice
86. I will not tell the first years that Snape is the voice of God.
87. I will not ask if I can use the Chamber of Secrets for a massive dance party.
88. I will not yell "Fire! Fire!" and shoot Aguamenti at someone who has just had a Pepper-up Potion.
89. I will not trick the house elves into replacing the lemon tarts with canary custards on April fools day.
90. I will not buy Peeves a package of Dungbombs for Christmas.
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
to the top
of the tree.
--IF YOU BELIEVE THAT HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG... REPOST THIS--
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLOND, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm AUSTRIAN, so I must be exactly like HITLER and think like a NAZI
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil (So I’ve been told)
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSS DRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I write Fanfics, so I MUST be a freak.
The white man said, "Coloured people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me coloured?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
(Post this on your profile if you hate racism.)
If you have ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.
92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off.
If you get inspiration for stories when you're too tired to write and forget the story the next day, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you’ve got a Sonic Screwdriver and/or want one, copy and paste this to your profile.
Whovian and PROUD OF IT!!
If you think apples should be banned for keeping the Doctor away, copy this into your profile.
If you want to form an angry mob and hang RTD by his toes over the English Channel for getting rid of Rose by putting her with the Doctor's clone and the terrible terrible thing he did to Donna, copy and paste this into your profile!
.eliforp ruoy otni sith etsap dna ypoc ,sdrawkcab siht daer ot hguone trams era uoy fI
If for no reason, you've laughed during a part of a movie or show that wasn't during a normally funny part, put this in your profile.
If you are obsessed with Doctor Who, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever wondered what you're like in a parallel universe, put this on your profile.
If you think that the Doctor and Rose should have got together, got married, and run off to make lots of little time babies then copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this onto your profile.
Less than 1 percent of teenagers don't use make-up. Are you one of those who don't? BE PROUD AND GLUE THIS THING IN YOUR PROFILE!
If you've ever threatened a computer or video game console, copy and paste this into your profile.
Asking the Doctor what button to press is like asking a cat to fetch the morning paper for you. You'll get a bemused look and no answer.
If you believe that all hospitals should have little shops...copy this onto your profile
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.
If you have ever copied and pasted something into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile
If you look through people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you have walked under something that is two feet over your head, but ducked anyway, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you can read/speak more than one language (not necessarily fluently), copy this into your profile.
If you like to quote things, copy this into your profile.
If you have too many of these copy and paste things in your profile and don't care who dislikes it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've actually stopped reading a story because of the terrible state of the grammar, add this to your profile.
A large percentage of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you are one of the ones that do and want to deck 'em, put this in your profile.
Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile.