Name : Dash ( all you need to know )
Age : in your dreams
Residence : south carolina
currently trying to get into some different animes : death note hetalia fairy tail ( although i'm starting that ) and others
that i don't feel naming.
one thing you should know is that i'm really lazy so I might not update as fast as others but i will try my best to finish a story because i hate when an author makes a story and just leaves it and i also hate really short chapters those are only for authors who update more than once a day.
i also like dark naruto fics and hate and despise canon naruto
favorite pairings :
naru/ any filler girl except isaribi
Hated pairings :
saku/anyone ( i really hate her )
sasu/anyone ( unless the story is good and he's a little less douchey )
Favorite sayings ( some are quotes )
"There is a fine line between sanity and insanity, and I have white out"
-If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried
B.O.H.I.C.A.: Bend Over Here It Comes Again
F.U.B.A.R. : F#cked up beyond all recognition
H.U.M.A.S.: Head Up My @ss Syndrom
S.N.A.F.U. : Situation Normal All F*cked Up
A.D.O.S.D : Attention Deficit Oh Shiny Disorder
F.O.C.U.S. : F*ck Off Cuz Ur Stupid
D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F. : Do I Look Like I Give A F*ck!
"Madness & Sanity are labels given by society...and I am Anti-Social"
I am fluent in three languages. English, Sarcasm and Profanity."
Diamonds are a Girls Best friend, Boobs are everybody's friend
-Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
-Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.
-Guns don’t kill people. Bullets kill people.
-I ran with scissors, and lived!
-You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you hurt, I hurt, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.
-It takes 42 muscles to frown, but only 4 muscles to reach out and bitch slap that motherfucker who made you frown.
-They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.
-Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
-Never bring a knife to a sword fight.
-When you open a can of whoop-ass, Chuck Norris jumps out.
-Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know when Chuck Norris is going to kill you.
-Oxygen requires Chuck Norris to live.
-Chuck Norris doesn't have a bank account. He just tells the bank how much he needs
-If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down
-If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
-Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
-The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
-Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
-Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
-The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris's fist.
-Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the fuck he wants.
-Chuck Norris, Vin Diesel and Arnold Schwarzenegger have all died and are in Heaven. Each of them hope to occupy the seat next to God. God asks Vin Diesel why he thinks he should have the seat and Vin replies, "I believe... I should have the seat because of the virtuosity in my toughness and pride." Arnie says, "I believe... that I should be the one sitting next to you because of all my achievements." God then turns to Chuck Norris, who replies with, "I believe... you are sitting in my seat."
-When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
- Chuck Norris once survived a suicide bombing. He was the bomber.
-Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
-Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
-Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.
-Little kids enjoy lighting ants on fire with magnifying glasses. Chuck Norris enjoys lighting little kids on fire with ants. Scientists have yet to find out how this feat is achieved.
-If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it's fucking beef.
-We all know the magic word is please. As in the sentence, "Please don't kill me." Too bad Chuck Norris doesn't believe in magic.
-Chuck Norris once went on Celebrity Jeopardy and answered, "Who is Chuck Norris?" to every question. It was the first and only time in Jeopardy history that a contestant answered every single question right.
-At birth, Chuck Norris came out feet first so he could roundhouse kick the doctor in the face. Nobody delivers Chuck Norris but Chuck Norris
-A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
-Chuck Norris has to sort his laundry into three loads: darks, whites, and bloodstains.
-If at first you don't succeed, you are obviously not Chuck Norris.
-Geico saved 15 by switching to Chuck Norris.
-If you see Chuck Norris crying he will grant you a wish, if your wish is dying.
-They say that lightning never strikes the same place twice. Neither does Chuck Norris. He doesn't have to.
-Water boils faster when Chuck Norris watches it.
-Chuck Norris is allowed to talk about Fight Club.
-The only thing we have to fear is fear itself... The only thing fear has to fear is Chuck Norris.
-The most effective form of suicide known to man is to type "Chuck Norris" into Google and hit "I'm Feeling Lucky!”
-Chuck Norris never gets brain freeze. Slurpees know when to back the fuck off.
-Chuck Norris refers to himself in fourth person.
-Switzerland isn't really neutral. They just haven't figured out what side Chuck Norris is on yet.
Chuck Norris doesn't give Christmas presents. If you live to see Christmas, that is your Christmas present from Chuck.
-Chuck Norris ends every relationship with "Its not me, its you".
-Chuck Norris was sending an email one day, when he realized that it would be faster to run.
-Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
-Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".
-Chuck Norris can speak Braille
If you are guilty of doing a British, Irish, Australian, Southern accent or Elvis impression, copy this in your profile
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.
If u already lost ur sanity copy and paste this to ur profile.
If you have ever walked into a room then forgot what you were doing, then started walking away then remembered, copy this into your profile.
Put an X if you have done these things things.
X You've run into a glass/screen door.
X You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks.
X You have caught yourself drooling.
X You have fallen asleep in class and started to talk/drool, or snore.
X You break a lot of things.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, zElDaPhAnToM-bLiNdBaNdIt-RaVeN, Firehawk, Rainfire, Snowfur, Rayne Star, i wish anime guys were real, XxcrimsonxgothicxtidexX, Hoshi-Naito, silently.doomed, crusnik.gunslinger,Flameus,Sen Ningyu no Sasori, Kesshite-Kurushimu
[Itachi Uchiha Score: 5 ]
[Kisame Hoshigaki Score: 6]
[Sasori Score: 4 ]
[Hidan Score: 6 ]
[Tobi Score: 4]
Random stuff i copied from other profiles =3
Not Racist But I Thought This Was Hilarious
1 - THAT'S NOT RIGHT...Sum Ting Wong
2 - ARE YOU HARBORING A FUGITIVE...Wai Yu Hai Ding
3 - SEE ME ASAP...Kum Hia
4 - STUPID MAN...Dum Fuk
5 - SMALL HORSE...Tai Ni Po Ni
6 - DID YOU GO TO THE BEACH...Wai Yu So Tan
7 - I BUMPED THE COFFEE TABLE...Ai Bang Mai Fa King Ni
8 - I THINK YOU NEED A FACE LIFT...Chin Tu Fat
9 - IT'S VERY DARK IN HERE...Wai So Dim
10 - I THOUGHT YOU WERE ON A DIET...Wai Yu Mun Ching
11 - THIS IS A TOW AWAY ZONE...No Pah King
12 - OUR MEETING IS SCHEDULED FOR NEXT WEEK...Wai Yu Kum Now
13 - STAYING OUT OF SIGHT...Lei Ying Lo
14 - HE'S CLEANING HIS AUTOMOBILE...Wa Shing Ka
15 - YOUR BODY ODOR IS OFFENSIVE...Yu Stin Ki Pu
16 - GREAT!...Fa King Su Pa
Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was
A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?" The husband says, "What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?" A few days go by, and he comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, the car won't start. I think it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?" He says: "What do I look like, Mr. Goodwrench?" Another few days go by, and it's raining pretty hard. The wife finds a leak in the roof. She says, "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can you please fix it?" He says, "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" The next day the husband comes home, and the roof is fixed. So is the plumbing. So is the car. He asks his wife what happened. "Oh, I had a handyman come in and fix them," she says. "Great! How much is that going to cost me?" he snarls. Wife says: "Nothing. He said he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake or slept with him." "Uh, well, what kind of cake did you make?" asks the husband. "What do I look like," she says, "Betty Crocker?"
"I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my gas with the beat of the music. After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee, and noticed that everybody was staring at me...
... then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod."
Hey b*tch my d*ck is so big it reaches from a-z on the keyboard AHAHAHAHAHAA...wait o.o
teacher ask lil johny,which body part goes to Heaven first
Whats the difference between jam and jelly….
you can't jelly your dick down a girls throat
"Legen...Wait for it...DARY!!"
Whats the difference between penutbutter and jam...
I can’t peanut butter my dick up your ass.
What the difference between a wife and a job...
After ten years a job still "sucks"
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered for having cultivated such valuable lessons as: knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch, and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion, or a band-aid to a student, but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses, and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents Truth and Trust, his wife Discretion, his daughter Responsibility, and his son Reason.
He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
15 WAYS TO DRIVE PEOPLE INSANE:
1) At lunchtime, sit in your parked car w/sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
4) In the memo field of all your checks, write "FOR SEXUAL FAVORS."
5) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
6) Don't use any punctuation
7) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
8) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
9) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
10) Sing along at the opera.
11) Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.
12) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
13) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won! 3rd time this week!"
14) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling, "Run for your lives, they're loose!"
15) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
1. Only in America ...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in America ...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America ...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America ...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in America ...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
6. Only in America ...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America ...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in America ...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
9. Only in America ...do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
10. Only in America ...do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup
All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
Some people are like slinkies. They seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs.
The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on
Better to stay silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt
Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience
Don't play stupid with an idiot, they'll always win.
I respect your opinion, I just think it's stupid
Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back
That which does not kill me had better run pretty damn fast
Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to
If explosives didn't solve your problems you obviously weren't using enough of them
The only difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has limits
Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.
I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing.
If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.
I'm not as dumb as you look
A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."
A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.
'Girls Don't Realize These Things'
But most of all
THE WE LOVE SASUKE-BASHING CLUB: If you hate Sasuke from NARUTO and love making him suffer, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: Kinomi-chan, EstherAngelofDeath, 9shadowcat9, AkatsukiMascot, VampireArgonian92, Kanervdss, Shinonigga, GravityTheWizard, Thymistacles, LScott of Faith,Horocrux, Mystic 6 tailed Naruto, viscious aggression 101, Uzunaru999,ilovebashing, Kesshite-kurushimu
To all "Hinata Cheats On Naruto Fic Writers." FUCK YOU!!!! In no way will Hinata cheat on Naruto, especially with Kiba of all people. She is too much in love with Naruto to do something like that. Copy and paste to profile if you agree.
If you think Masashi Kishimoto is ruining Naruto and agree, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: The Fifth Rider of Armageddon, Hiroshima Namikaze, Zaara the black, desuta, Reikson, D-reaper X-20, blackstardragon624, chinoodin, The Silver Blossom, RasenganFin, Raidentensho, Knives91, Kingkakashi, DarkSamuraiX1999, THE HEE-HO KING, Wirespeed91, Naruto 21, GraityTheWizard, GuyverZero, durwin, Hakkyou no Yami, VFSNAKE, Stormrunner56, Haru Kitsune, DragonMaster4381, Demon Wraith, SCoTTieTheeReSeaRCHeR,darkvizardking69,Ultimateanimefan17,Uzunaru999,ilovebashing, Kesshite-Kurushimu
Put this on your
Put this on your
Put this on your page if you love NARUTO X HINATA(and to help them gain world domination mu haha MU AHAHA) (ALL HAIL FANDOM!!)
Due to an interesting comment from another person, I have decided to deliver the following warning. There are a number of things here that are tearjerkers, and will cause an emotion break down for those who are rather emotional. If you easily breakdown, emotionally, you've been warned.
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Girl: Do you like me?
Girl: Do you want me?
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Girl: Would you live for me?
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile
But most of all
Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'
If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things'
We're a Dying Breed
To every guy that's said, "Sex CAN wait.”
To every guy that's said, "You're beautiful.
To every guy that was never too busy to drive across town to see her.
To every guy that gives flowers and a card when she is sick.
To every guy who has given her flowers just because. To every guy that said he would die for her.
To every guy that really would.
To every guy that took time to do what she wanted to do.
To every guy that she cried in front of.
To every guy that holds hands with her.
To every guy that kisses her with meaning.
To every guy that hugs her when she's sad.
To every guy that hugs her for no reason at all.
To every guy who would give their jacket up for her.
To every guy that calls to make sure she got home safe.
To every guy that would sit and wait for her for hours just to see her for ten minutes.
To every guy that would give his seat up.
To every guy that just wants to cuddle.
To every guy that reassured her that she was beautiful no matter what.
To every guy who told his secrets to her.
To every guy that tried to show how much he cared through every word and every breath.
To every guy that thought maybe this could be the one.
To every guy that believed in her dreams.
To every guy that would have done anything so she could achieve them.
To every guy that never laughed at her when she told him her dreams.
To every guy that walked her to her car. To every guy that gave his heart.
To every guy who prays that she is happy even if you are not with her.
...This one bulletin is for you...
Not many girls appreciate nice guys anymore... And because of this, there are not many left out there... i guarantee 90 of the men on your page will not repost this cuz they care more about their image If you are a nice guy repost this with "We're a Dying Breed " If you are a girl that thinks every guy should treat a girl this way repost this with: "To Every Guy..."
This is really sweet...
When a girl is quiet, a million things are running through her mind.
When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply.
When a girl looks at you with her eyes full of question, she is wondering how long you will be around.
When a girl answers "I'm fine." after a few seconds, she is not fine at all.
When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying.
When a girl rests her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be her's forever.
When a girl wants to see you everday, she wants to be pampered.
When a girl says "I love you." she means it.
When a girl says "I miss you." nobody could miss you more than that.
Life only comes around once, so make sure you spend it with the right person.
Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, and calls you back when you hang up on him.
The guy who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead,
Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats.
The one who holds your hand in front of his friends and is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you there for him.
The one who turns to his friends and declares "That's her.".
If you read this, you have to repost it, guy or girl, or you will have bad luck for the rest of your life.
If you repost this, in five minutes your true love will call or message you.
Tonight at midnight, they will realize that they love you.
Something good will happen at approximately 1:42 pm tomorrow, and it could happen anywhere.
So get ready for the biggest shock of your life.
If you don't repost this, you will be cursed with relationship problems for all of eternity.
Repost this to your profile, and spare yourself the emotional stress.