Poll: Which book series is better? Vote Now!
Author has written 1 story for Maximum Ride.
Just FYI my name is shortened, the long version is HarryPotter-PercyJackson-Divergent-MaximumRide-LOVER. They are all the book series that I LOVE!!!!
Ways to annoy people on an elevator:
1) Crack open your briefcase or hand bag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) Meow occasionally.
6) Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7) Say -DING at each floor.
8) Say "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) Drop a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) Swat at flies that don't exist.
22) Call out "Group hug" then enforce it.
Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity:
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. When caught sleeping at school/work/wherever you are not supposed to be sleeping, and you are woken up, shout, "AMEN!"
5.Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6.In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write For
7.Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'.
9. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11.Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner,'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.
If you were insane, crazy, and/or random before being insane,crazy, and/or random was cool, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.
If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this in your profile.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.
If you or your best friend is insane, copy this onto your profile. (It's me who is insane... shes not TOTALLY crazy!)
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile
If you actually enjoy reading, copy this into your profile.
If you are of the opinion that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever read something and got sucked into that book, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever ran into something while walking with a book, copy and paste this onto your profile.
Did you know the average person only reads three books per year? If you don't think it is possible to read that little, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.
If you are odd and proud of it put this on your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this onto your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this onto your profile
If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
Max: Do I ever cross your mind?
Max: Do you like me?
Max: Do you want me?
Max: Would you cry if I left?!?
Max: Would you live for me?
Max: Would you do anything for me? At all?
Max: Okayyy...Choose--me or your life
Fang: My life
Max knees him, glaring, and runs away in pain and anger. Fang runs after her, wincing, and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
Max bites her lip and says, "Ohhh...You need some...er...ice?"
If you find this to be incredibly Faxish, copy and paste it into your profile.
A SCARY WAY TO BREAK UP!!!!! DO NOT stop reading this or something bad will happen!!!!!!!!
One day, Sarah was walking home from school when her boyfriend drove by and honked at her to get in. She got in his car and he drove her to the lake. Her boyfriend said he was going to tell her something very important.
Sarah could have sworn he was going to propose. However, he flicked her off, pushed her in the lake and yelled, “I am breaking up with you, you awful _ _ _ _ _!! I hate you and I think that maybe you should just end your _ _ _ _ _ _ _ life! DUMB _ _ _ _!!!”
He laughed and drove off. It was a very cold day. Sarah climbed out of the lake, freezing cold, and feeling the worst she had in her entire life. She got home went in a hot bath, and slit her wrists and died in the bathtub.
Her parents yelled and screamed at her to get out until they finally broke the door down. They saw no body, but the entire bathroom was dripping with her blood. Her mom went insane and killed herself three days later, her dad is in prison, accused of murder.
Later that week, Sarah’s ex boyfriend was taking a shower when she came from the drain, rotting and bloody, with a razor in her hand and said “Goodbye Jason.” She cut his throat before he could scream.
If you do not repost this with the title “1 scary way to break up”, you are a heartless _ _ _ _ _ _ and Sarah come to you in the shower from the drain, and will kill you the same way she killed her boyfriend. 24 ppl have broken this chain and died.
You have 13 minutes
This poem is really touching so please read it.
A drunk man in an Oldsmobile
They said had run the light
That caused the six-car pileup
On 109 that night.
When broken bodies lay about
'And blood was everywhere,'
'The sirens screamed out eulogies,'
For death was in the air.
'A mother, trapped inside her car,'
Was heard above the noise;
Her plaintive plea near split the air:
'Oh, God, please spare my boys!'
She fought to loose her pinned hands;
'She struggled to get free,'
But mangled metal held her fast
In grim captivity.
Her frightened eyes then focused
'On where the back seat once had been,'
But all she saw was broken glass and
Two children's seats crushed in.
Her twins were nowhere to be seen;
'She did not hear them cry, '
'And then she prayed they'd been thrown free, '
'Oh, God, don't let them die! '
Then firemen came and cut her loose,
'But when they searched the back, '
'They found therein no little boys, '
But the seat belts were intact.
They thought the woman had gone mad
'And was traveling alone, '
'But when they turned to question her, '
They discovered she was gone.
Policemen saw her running wild
And screaming above the noise
'In beseeching supplication,
Please help me find my boys!
They're four years old and wear blue shirts;
'Their jeans are blue to match.''
'One cop spoke up,
''They're in my car, '
And they don't have a scratch.
They said their daddy put them there
'And gave them each a cone, '
Then told them both to wait for Mom
To come and take them home.
'I've searched the area high and low, '
But I can't find their dad.
'He must have fled the scene, '
'I guess, and that is very bad.'
'The mother hugged the twins and said, '
'While wiping at a tear, '
'He could not flee the scene, you see, '
'For he's been dead a year.'
'The cop just looked confused and asked, '
'Now, how can that be true? '
'The boys said,
''Mommy, Daddy came '
'And left a kiss for you.''
He told us not to worry
'And that you would be all right, '
And then he put us in this car with
'The pretty, flashing light. '
'We wanted him to stay with us, '
'Because we miss him so, '
'But Mommy, he just hugged us tight '
And said he had to go.
He said someday we'd understand
'And told us not to fuss, '
'And he said to tell you, Mommy, '
'He's watching over us.'
The mother knew without a doubt
'That what they spoke was true, '
'For she recalled their dad's last words, '
' I will watch over you.'
This message works on the day you receive it.
Let us see if it is true.
ANGELS EXIST but some times, since they don't all have wings, we call them FRIENDS.
Pass this on to your true friends. Something good will happen to you at 11:11 in the evening; something that you have been waiting to hear.
Do not break this prayer, post it on your profile! :D
STOP RACISM! NOW! DO IT! NOW! I SAID NOW!
(I'm white, but I HATE racism!!!)
A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him. The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "When I was born I was black,"
"When I grew up I was black,"
"When I'm sick I'm black,"
"When I go in the sun I'm black,"
"When I'm cold I'm black,"
"When I die I'll be black." "But you sir..."
"When you're born you're pink,"
"When you grow up you're white,"
"When you're sick, you're green,"
"When you go in the sun you turn red,"
"When you're cold you turn blue,"
"And when you die you turn purple."
"And yet you have the nerve to call me colored" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Try not to cry
Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,
He told his friends that it was cool,
And when he pulled the trigger back,
It shot with a great, huge crack.
Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!
When I went to school that day,
I never said good-bye.
I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.
When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,
And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.
Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,
And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.
And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now, And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now
And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best
Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest
Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,
And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass
Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.
But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.
I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.
Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,
But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest
When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could
Please listen to me if you would,
I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new
I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,
I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.
But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late, Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry I had to cancel the date. I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true
And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"
In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech Students Who Were Lost
Disclaimer: I don't own this poem either but please pass this on for all the young students who lost their lives that day
IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE, COPY/PASTE THIS ON YOUR PROFILE!!
Her name was Auroura She was only five This is what happened When she was alive
Her dad was a drunk Her mom was an addict Her parents kept her Locked in an attic
Her only friend was a little toy bear It was old and worn out And had patches of hair
She always talked to it When no one's around She lays there and hugs it Not a peep of sound
Until her parents unlock the door Some more and more pain She'll have to endure
A bruise on her leg A scar on her face Why would she be In such a horrible place?
But she grabs her bear And softly cries She loves her parents But they want her to die
She sits in the corner Quiet but thinking, "Please God, why is My life always sinking? "
Such a bad life For a sad little kid She'd get beaten and beaten For anything she did
Then one night Her mom came home high And the poor child was beaten As hours went by
Then her mom suddenly Grabbed for a blade It was sharp and pointy One that she made
She thrusted the blade Right in her chest, "You deserve to die You worthless piece of s!"
The mom walked out Leaving the girl slowly dying She grabbed her bear And again started crying
Police showed up At the small little house Then quickly barged in Everything quiet as a mouse
One officer slowly Opened a door To find the little girl Lying dead on the floor
It must have been bad To go through so much harm But at least she died With her best friend in her arms
(add this to your profile if your against child abuse)
I want child abuse to stop! and if you do, too, copy and paste this onto your profile Thank you to flamin. guitarist for posting this in your profile and for letting others read it
A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug.
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself? It's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of brake failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his brake wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love.
Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake. The average person can't. (I don't own this)
this is this cat
this is is cat
this is how cat
this is to cat
this is keep cat
this is a cat
this is retard cat
this is busy cat
this is for cat
this is forty cat
this is seconds cat
Now go back and read the THIRD word in each line from the top down.
When she walks away from you mad
When she stares at your mouth
When she pushes you or hits you
Grab her and don't let go.
When she starts cussing at you
Kiss her and tell her you love her.
When she's quiet
Ask her whats wrong.
When she ignores you
Give her your attention.
When she pulls away
Pull her back.
When you see her at her worst
Tell her she's beautiful.
When you see her start crying
Just hold her and don't say a word.
When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind.
When she's scared
When she lays her head on your shoulder
Tilt her head up and kiss her.
When she steals your favorite hat
Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night.
When she teases you
Tease her back and make her laugh.
When she doesn't answer for a long time
Reassure her that everything is okay.
When she looks at you with doubt
Back yourself up.
When she says that she likes you she really does more than you could understand.
When she grabs at your hands
Hold hers and play with her fingers.
When she bumps into you bump into her back and make her laugh.
When she tells you a secret keep it safe and untold.
When she looks at you in your eyes don't looks away until she does.
When she misses you she's hurting inside.
When you break her heart the pain never really goes away.
When she says its over she still wants you to be hers.
When she re-post this bulletin she wants you to read it
Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.
- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
- When she says she's OK don't believe it, talk with her
- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you-
Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her-
Call her before you sleep and after you wake up
- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.
- Tease her and let her tease you back.
Stay up all night with her when she's sick.
- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid
.- Give her the world.
- Let her wear your clothes.
- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.
- Let her know she's important.
- Kiss her in the pouring rain.
- When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Who's ass am I kicking babe?"
I love this because I would love a guy to this just for me because he cares. If only...
If your life were a movie, what would the soundtrack be? So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, youtube playlist, etc)
Opening credits: Fightin' Words - Trace Adkins
Waking up: Do you want to built a snowman - Movie 'Frozen'
First day at school: Stay Stay Stay - Taylor Swift
Making new best friend: Let it Whip - Movie 'Pitch Perfect'
Falling in love: Payphone - Maroon 5
Breaking up: She's My Girl - Five for Fighting
Prom: Gunpowder and Lead - Miranda Lambert
Graduation: Locked out of Heaven - Bruno Mars
Life's okay: Whiskey Lullaby - Brad Paisely
Death of a close friend: Let Her Go - Passenger
Mental breakdown: Cruise - Florida Georgia Line
Driving: Come and Get It - Selena Gomez
Flashback: 9 to 5 - Dolly Parton
Getting back together: Stand Up - Five For Fighting
Birth of a child: Symphony Lane - Five For Fighting
Wedding scene: Swagger Jagger - Cherl Lloyd
Car accident: Blurred Lines - Robin Thicke
Final battle: Too Close - Alex Clare
Death scene: Sure Be Cool If You Did - Blake Shelton
Funeral song: Hall Of Fame - The Script (How more perfect can you get?)
End credits: Heaven Knows - Five For Fighting
Deleted scenes: Just Give me A Reason - Pink
New Start Links
Max's Ear Piercings:
Unsafe External Link