Night of the Living Monkey
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Joined 08-08-03, id: 435058, Profile Updated: 05-22-16
Author has written 60 stories for Batman, D.Gray-Man, Batman Begins/Dark Knight, Doctor Who, Torchwood, Supernatural, Sherlock, Gotham, Mindhunter, Futurama, and Rick and Morty.

I was feeling nostalgic-ish for my old username, but I've decided against a total return to form. Instead, I'm going to play around a bit until I find what I like. Sorry if it causes any confusion!

If for some reason you'd like to know a bit about me, I'll give you a brief bio.

I'm a physical description minimalist, both in my fics and in my profile. I also have the vocabulary equivalent of Katamari Damacy. I roll around, picking up words from other languages. I seem particularly fond of British English, Spanish, and Yiddish. I am also the King of References. Go on, challenge me, peons.

Long list of favorite bands, TV shows, and books? Bah, who needs it? Instead of subjecting you to that typical profile torment, I'll just give you some of my favorite quotes, which are more interesting and useful, anyway.

The man who has his millions will want everything he can lay his hands on and then raise his voice against the poor devil who wants ten cents more a day. - Samuel Gompers

In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on. -Robert Frost

I think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his abilities. - Oscar Wilde

Speaking personally, you can have my gun, but you'll take my book when you pry my cold, dead fingers off of the binding. -Stephen King

You have to be a bastard to make it, and that's a fact. -John Lennon

"Everything must have a purpose?" asked God. "Certainly," said man. "Then I leave it to you to think of one for all this," said God. And He went away. -The Book of Bokonon

Nobody exists on purpose. Nobody belongs anywhere. Everybody’s gonna die. Come watch TV?- Morty

Lo behold a pale horsez with a dood sitin on it, his naym wuz Deaths, an liek Hadez an stuff followd himz. Him had enuf skillz to be in ur base killin lots ur doodz. -Revelation 6:8 of the LOLCat Bible (I am not making that up!)

Now, as for my fanfiction. I was dormant for about two years before coming back to life. I have quite a few ideas, so I hope to remain active this time around. I find the whole process of writing both relaxing and exciting. Since I'm a writing major in college, fanfiction is also good practice.

As for my likes and dislikes, fanfiction-wise:

Mary-Sues: Hate them, despise them, get violently ill in their presence. We all have fantasies. Unless we are serial killers with impulse control problems, we don't subject unwilling victims to our desires. You may want to be a perfectly-proportioned blonde wizard sex-cake with boobies everyone wants to touch. I don't want to hear about it.

Slash: It's incredibly hard to find good slash. INCREDIBLY hard. I have no problem with slash as a genre, I have problems with slash not having plot, grammar, or spell-check. Also, some characters were simply not meant to be gay, no matter how hard you try.

OC's: Original Characters have a way of unfailingly becoming Mary-Sues. It's like the force of evolution turns an OC into a perky little monster over the course of four chapters. Frightening, really.

Missing Sister/Twin: Harry Potter writers, I'm calling you out specifically here! There are no secret hidden twins! That's pure soap-opera fodder! Also, these missing twins/sisters are almost entirely of the Mary-Sue variety. You know, insanely powerful wizards, sexy enough to ensnare the Pope, that kind of thing.

Modern Age: One of my favorite fics is actually of this variety. Sadly, most Modern Age fics are crap. Somehow anachronistic characters, asides from surviving into the modern age, entirely change their personalities. And not for the better. You'd think a person, elf, hobbit, etc living thousands of years would have better things to do than shop at Wal-Mart for days on end. But no.

Everyone Goes Emo: Just no. Please, my local mall is Emo-Jima. If I want to see wannabe poets dressed in black, I'll sit on a bench and stare for ten minutes.

Poetry: God, when you get a good piece of fanfiction poetry, the heavens just open. It's rarer than blue diamonds, but it will end up on your favorites list. By the way, poets, a haiku goes 5-7-5, and no other way. Damn it.

People Who Can't Tell the Difference Between a Guest Review and a PM: Yeah, you know who you are. Cut it out.

I used to be one hell of a flamer and nasty reviewer, as some of you may know, but I've mellowed in my old, old age. I won't say it's entirely behind me (and don't be the one who brings me out of retirement!) but I'm taking a hiatus from grammar fascism.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Angel's War by RubbishRobots reviews
SEQUEL TO THAT WHICH HOLDS THE IMAGE. Life. All normal and stuff. With jobs and houses and boring-y, woring-y things like that. Normality, as Harry Potter realises, does not attract mad men in little blue boxes, so any hope of seeing his old friend the Doctor again is pretty slim. But then Ginny Weasley notices the sky is falling, and everything goes completely to hell.
Crossover - Doctor Who & Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 16 - Words: 43,766 - Reviews: 498 - Favs: 1,032 - Follows: 1,521 - Updated: 8/31/2018 - Published: 4/7/2013 - 11th Doctor, Harry P.
You Blow My Mind, Hey Missy by TheDeathlyMarshmallows reviews
In which everyone's favourite and completely bonkers Time Lady does her best to throw an olive branch to The Doctor, Clara, Bill and Nardole. Whether or not they recognise the olive branch when they see it is quite another matter.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 14,376 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 6/25/2018 - Published: 10/9/2015 - Clara O., 12th Doctor, Bill P., Missy
Dear Joker by 4ofCups reviews
What happens when Ledger's Joker decides to take a hiatus from crime, dabble in journalism and dispense his opinions to the faithful readers of Gotham's premier advice column? He's got his own ideas about tact, social graces and virtue: they're overrated.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: T - English - Horror/Humor - Chapters: 39 - Words: 34,989 - Reviews: 552 - Favs: 227 - Follows: 141 - Updated: 4/8/2017 - Published: 6/30/2009 - Joker
Clockwork by HoistTheColours reviews
Upon stumbling into an abandoned apartment building, the Joker encounters a little girl.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Suspense/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 112,269 - Reviews: 1653 - Favs: 1,438 - Follows: 759 - Updated: 2/17/2017 - Published: 2/24/2009 - Joker - Complete
Burninating Negan by Trogdor19 reviews
Carol finds out Negan enslaved Daryl. And then Negan is very, very sorry. *Spoilers up to Episode 7x04
Walking Dead - Rated: M - English - Suspense/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 4 - Words: 12,833 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 1/24/2017 - Published: 1/23/2017 - [Daryl D., Carol] Michonne, Negan - Complete
Everyday Occurrences by AZ-woodbomb reviews
Gotham is the place for you.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 46 - Words: 73,622 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 6/18/2015 - Published: 10/22/2012
Who? by foxeye10 reviews
Doctor Who characters get taken apart on the proverbial chopping board in 100 word drabble descriptions. New: Jo Grant
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 40 - Words: 5,790 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 5/12/2014 - Published: 10/30/2011
Dinner by a-hint-of-garlic reviews
Wherein Jim gets an invitation for dinner, Hannibal thinks he is the only one who gets the joke and Sebastian actually knows which one is the salad fork.
Crossover - Sherlock & Hannibal - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,568 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 16 - Published: 7/4/2013 - J. Moriarty, Hannibal L. - Complete
Flesh for Flesh by Student of Dreams reviews
Hannibal was not accustomed with asking for help, but a new development finds the good doctor standing in the middle of a crossroads waiting for its king.
Crossover - Supernatural & Hannibal - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,633 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 25 - Published: 6/15/2013 - Crowley, Hannibal L. - Complete
That Which Holds The Image by RubbishRobots reviews
Harry Potter faces a boggart that doesn't turn into a Dementor or even Voldermort, but into a horror from his childhood. Now the boggart isn't even a boggart anymore. There's no imitation. That which holds the image of an Angel, becomes itself an Angel.
Crossover - Doctor Who & Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Horror - Chapters: 9 - Words: 40,036 - Reviews: 1222 - Favs: 3,525 - Follows: 1,696 - Updated: 4/14/2013 - Published: 7/7/2011 - 11th Doctor, Harry P. - Complete
Moments of Madness by AZ-woodbomb reviews
Love works in mysterious ways. It wears many faces, but the first cut is always the deepest.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,481 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Published: 1/25/2013 - Complete
Flowers and Sunshine by AZ-woodbomb reviews
Something new and alien has hit the streets of Gotham: Happiness. If nothing is done quickly, the city will be drowned in bright colors and fluffy feelings.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 18 - Words: 26,006 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 11/11/2011 - Published: 8/25/2011 - Richard G./Nightwing - Complete
Frenemies by scarlett onyx reviews
Eddie starts out for a drive one night and finds more than he bargained for. Can the Master of Fear and the Prince of Puzzles coexist peacefully? no slash
Batman - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 35 - Words: 22,004 - Reviews: 188 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 8/27/2011 - Published: 6/8/2011 - Edward N./The Riddler, J. Crane/Scarecrow
Intertwined by The Illegible reviews
Nothing can part them.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 786 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 4/1/2011 - Published: 4/1/2010 - Bruce W./Batman, The Joker
Impromptu Affair by GreyLiliy reviews
Good partners are hard to find - but sometimes they just drop in unexpected. And Joker's going to keep hold, whether Scarecrow & Two-Face like it or not.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 57,568 - Reviews: 263 - Favs: 215 - Follows: 211 - Updated: 3/22/2011 - Published: 9/26/2008 - Joker, J. Crane, Harvey D.
Loop by Sanguine Ink reviews
"He was the champion – no the lord – of foolhardy plans, whipped together at the last second with barely a prayer of working. But this…this took the cake. It was all up to Jack now." Ten, Rose, and Jack in a spot of trouble, several times over.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 9 - Words: 25,059 - Reviews: 185 - Favs: 354 - Follows: 72 - Updated: 2/22/2011 - Published: 2/5/2011 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
The Littlest Celery by Princess Hannah reviews
X-posted at Teaspoon. A bit of heartwarming crack inspired by my friends on Tumblr. Ladies and gentlemen, this is the story of Five's celery.
Doctor Who - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 933 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/31/2011 - 5th Doctor - Complete
The Sword of Damocles by Lauralot reviews
How does the Joker work through his own pain? By inflicting it on others. Sequel to The Doctors and the Nurses They Adore Me So.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 17 - Words: 52,833 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 72 - Updated: 10/16/2010 - Published: 5/28/2010 - Joker, J. Crane
Slipping, Gripping by bookgodess15 reviews
House hates everyone and everything. Chase can't fix that anymore than he can fix his marriage, so Chase doesn't really try. S&M, but no slash.
House, M.D. - Rated: M - English - Horror/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,558 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 8 - Published: 7/30/2010 - G. House, R. Chase - Complete
The Secrets Of Scary People by J-Horror Girl reviews
There's something living in that chest. It's been in there for two hundred years. Don't fool yourself. The lock isn't broken. It just doesn't work... from the outside.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Mystery - Chapters: 60 - Words: 120,616 - Reviews: 1043 - Favs: 278 - Follows: 222 - Updated: 5/27/2010 - Published: 4/8/2009 - J. Crane
The Doctors and the Nurses They Adore Me So by Lauralot reviews
You can lead a clown to Arkham, but can you keep him in?
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 40 - Words: 134,839 - Reviews: 575 - Favs: 290 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 4/30/2010 - Published: 1/8/2010 - Joker, J. Crane - Complete
The Trouble with Hamsters by xxCerezasxx reviews
Total and utter crack. Dean gets a new pet, Alastair has a new vessel, and Sam is confused. Again, crack.
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,203 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/6/2010 - Dean W., Sam W. - Complete
The Dalek Book of Dalek Poetry pocket size ed by Hot Pink Butterfly reviews
Excerpts from the Dalek Book of Dalek Poetry.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 178 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/22/2010 - Complete
Shadow Selves by Lauralot reviews
Living together against both parties' will is hard, and romance is never easy. Especially when your alter egos hate each other. Eventual Wayne/Crane. Sequel to The Knight and The Prince.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 100 - Words: 268,766 - Reviews: 1278 - Favs: 252 - Follows: 67 - Updated: 12/31/2009 - Published: 5/24/2009 - J. Crane, Bruce W./Batman - Complete
The Knight and the Prince by Lauralot reviews
Joker decides he wants to play mind games with Batman, and brings the Scarecrow along. Somewhat slash. Sequel to Say That We're Sweethearts Again.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 55 - Words: 167,979 - Reviews: 830 - Favs: 163 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 12/20/2009 - Published: 2/20/2009 - Joker, Bruce W./Batman - Complete
Slaughterhouse Five by AZ-woodbomb reviews
An unwanted visit in suburban Gotham.
Batman - Rated: M - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,066 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Published: 12/3/2009 - Complete
The Horrible Sickness by Lauralot reviews
What's worse than the Clown Prince of Crime? The Clown Prince of Crime with a fever. Rated for language, violence, and briefly disgusting content, but mostly for safety.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,840 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 12 - Published: 10/4/2009 - J. Crane, Joker - Complete
Fille de Joie by BiteMeTechie reviews
Everyone in Gotham has a story. Yes, even you. *REVISED*
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,822 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 12 - Updated: 9/30/2009 - Published: 3/21/2009 - Complete
mY fAVoritE tHinGS by 4ofCups reviews
Ledger's Joker is feeling blue instead of purple. How does he pick himself up? Cue the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical score, replace the Austrian Alps with the backdrop of Gotham, and sing along. You all know the tune.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 415 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/18/2009 - Bruce W./Batman, Joker - Complete
The Accidental Therapist by Lauralot reviews
Sometimes you end up helping the villain, when all you intended was to bring him in. Sequel to Act Like We Are Fools. Rated for gore.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Friendship - Chapters: 27 - Words: 86,458 - Reviews: 409 - Favs: 138 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 9/2/2009 - Published: 1/11/2009 - J. Crane, Bruce W./Batman - Complete
ABC by It'sTimeToDance reviews
The Joker knows Gotham, he knows Batman, and he knows his ABC's...
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 346 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/10/2009 - Joker - Complete
The Final Joke by Ultiman92 reviews
Last winter, a man died. Lost and confused in the afterlife, his one companion is a laughing joker. A tribute to Heath Ledger.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: T - English - Spiritual/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,105 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 13 - Published: 9/12/2008 - Joker - Complete
Odd Vocation by Fayth3 reviews
The Doctor finds something to do while Rose is asleep. Crack fic. Alpha Prompt P- Pancakes
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,953 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 150 - Follows: 13 - Published: 8/28/2008 - Complete
School Lunch by The-Reject-Crayon reviews
Attempting to get Road and Jasdevi to school on time, Tyki is pulled over by a cop. In the aftermath, he seems to have a nice surprise for the three kids... Oneshot, no pairings.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,620 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 110 - Follows: 8 - Published: 8/11/2008 - Tyki Mikk, Jasdero - Complete
How to Write a Bad TDK Romance by Steven 'Janus' Apollo reviews
Look at all those badly-written, poorly characterized Suefics floating about for the Joker! Don't you wish you could make your own and annoy everyone? Well, thanks to this handy step-by-step guide written by moi, now you can!
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,222 - Reviews: 174 - Favs: 178 - Follows: 16 - Published: 8/7/2008 - Complete
if you'd been a dog by teethlikedog reviews
Knives out, catch the mouse. TDK; Joker/Batman
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,127 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/5/2008 - Complete
Social Butterfly With Fangs by BiteMeTechie reviews
Jervis put the kettle on, kettle on, kettle on, Jervis, do put the kettle on, Jonathan Crane needs tea.
Batman - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,154 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/22/2008 - Jervis T./Mad Hatter, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
The Recitation of the Daleks by Jessa L'Rynn reviews
The fourth Doctor meets a man in a bathrobe on a Vogon ship infested with some unusual Daleks. Time is slipping away. And the answer's still 42. A response to the July II challenge for Kathryn Shadow.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,559 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/18/2008 - 4th Doctor - Complete
A Mad Teaparty by Tendo Rei reviews
Jervis has a very special guest today!
Batman - Rated: T - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,973 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/27/2007 - J. Crane/Scarecrow, Jervis T./Mad Hatter - Complete
Last One Standing by MK3A2 reviews
Charlie Prince draws last. Oneshot.
3:10 to Yuma, 2007 - Rated: T - English - Drama/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 787 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/2/2007 - Complete
A Cuddle for a Dalek by Reichenbach reviews
Crackfic for a timeandchips challenge. A dalek seeks something forbidden.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,717 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/29/2007 - Complete
Sacrifice by Sketty24 reviews
After averting New York from disaster, Martha ponders over the Doctor's readiness to offer himself as sacrifice to the Daleks. He seemed so desperate, so pleading. Perhaps being a Time Lord really is a curse.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,440 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/5/2007 - Complete
Ab Tenebrae by Tendo Rei reviews
HatterScarecrow. Jonathon Crane has a doctor's hands...
Batman - Rated: T - English - Angst/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,327 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/4/2007 - Jervis T./Mad Hatter, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
And so it is by ladyFrost2 reviews
Everyone gets old in the end. Even heroes and villains. Not quite slash.
Batman - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,390 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/31/2006 - Bruce W./Batman, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
A Mary Sue Alphabet by Irony-chan reviews
A's for Amanda Our hero's twin sister Got lost as a baby and Gosh, how he missed her...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,497 - Reviews: 2821 - Favs: 7,162 - Follows: 588 - Published: 1/12/2005 - Complete
The Dark Man by Sulwen reviews
A found poem about everyone's favorite villain. This was written for a school project, but it came out better than I expected. Enjoy!
Dark Tower series - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 662 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/22/2004
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Gotham Ghost Hunt
A group of would-be paranormal investigators goes searching for ghosts in the wrong abandoned building.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,346 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/31/2020 - J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Quarantine! reviews
Gotham's latest quarantine leads to some odd partners in crime.
Batman - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,255 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/8/2020 - Drury W./Killer Moth, J. Crane/Scarecrow
Left out in the Cold reviews
An early blizzard disrupts the Scarecrow's plans for Halloween. Harley Quinn disrupts them even more.
Batman - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,182 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/30/2019 - Harley Quinn, J. Crane/Scarecrow
You Really Got a Hold on Me reviews
Holden tries to salvage a trip to California after an interview goes poorly. Ed gets sick of being the backup plan.
Mindhunter - Rated: M - English - Crime/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,846 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/21/2019 - Complete
The Red Eyed League reviews
Sherlock is faced with a mismatched set of crimes linked only by one odd similarity. The deeper he delves into these crimes, the further he seems from an answer. And the closer he seems to stepping over a precipice from which there is no return. SuperLock.
Crossover - Supernatural & Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Crime/Supernatural - Chapters: 15 - Words: 39,929 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 93 - Updated: 3/30/2019 - Published: 8/8/2015 - Crowley, Sherlock H., John W., J. Moriarty - Complete
Augmentation reviews
When Morty's computer breaks, Rick decides to make him one that can withstand his teenage viewing habits. Unfortunately, the robots Rick planned to use for spare parts don't feel like cooperating.
Crossover - Doctor Who & Rick and Morty - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 22,202 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 2/1/2019 - Published: 5/18/2018 - 12th Doctor, Morty S., Rick S., Summer S. - Complete
May All Your New Year Dreams Come True
All the Scarecrow wants for Christmas is to be left alone to plot. All the Mad Hatter wants is a friend. And maybe to be a little bit taller.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,092 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/25/2018 - Jervis T./Mad Hatter, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Terror in the Library
The Scarecrow goes to the library. Anyone who expects a quiet place to browse the stacks is soon disappointed.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,674 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/31/2018 - J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Control the Pet Population reviews
After discovering the horror that is hyena childbirth, Harley and the Joker decide against breeding a hyena army and opt for neutering instead. Of course, the Joker isn't THAT responsible, so Harley needs a friend to support her.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,406 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/13/2018 - Harley Quinn, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Christmas if it Kills Us reviews
Only in Gotham could Christmas feature clowns, hatters, scarecrows, brainwashing, attempted murder, and a party you can't refuse.
Batman - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,764 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/25/2017 - Harley Quinn, Jervis T./Mad Hatter, J. Crane/Scarecrow
Four Characters in Search of an Exit reviews
A broken elevator threatens to upset Halloween plans for three of Gotham's most infamous villains. And a poor, random schmuck trapped with them.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,329 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/31/2017 - Harley Quinn, Jervis T./Mad Hatter, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Power of Attorney
A comatose Butch gets a visitor who has nothing but his best interests in mind. Yeah, right.
Gotham - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,035 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/20/2017 - Butch G., V. Zsasz
Happiest Season of All reviews
Harley throws a Christmas dinner and invites her best friends. Not even Santa Claus can bring peace on earth to that gathering.
Batman - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,450 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 5 - Published: 12/23/2016 - Harley Quinn, Jervis T./Mad Hatter, Edward N./The Riddler, J. Crane/Scarecrow
Three Strikes reviews
And you're out! A vengeful villain brings a thorny end to Gotham's baseball season.
Batman - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,909 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/28/2016 - Poison Ivy - Complete
How the Dinosaurs Ate Christmas reviews
Clara wants to see dinosaurs for Christmas and the Doctor reluctantly agrees. A not so merry chase through a swamp ensues.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,500 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/25/2015 - Clara O., 12th Doctor - Complete
Halloween Wars reviews
The Scarecrow has a diabolical plan for Halloween. The Joker has one hundred pounds of stolen bacon.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,037 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/30/2015 - Harley Quinn, The Joker, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Master of Puppets reviews
The Penguin hires a ventriloquist who may not be the one actually pulling the strings during the act.
Gotham - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,569 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/3/2015 - O. Cobblepot/The Penguin
Locard's Principle reviews
Sherlock sees young Archie for what he really is. A budding sociopath. In the following years, Sherlock does his best to keep Archie from slipping into darkness. Their tenuous balancing act threatens to topple when Jim Moriarty exerts his influence.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Crime - Chapters: 9 - Words: 29,830 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 3/20/2015 - Published: 3/7/2014 - Sherlock H., J. Moriarty, Archie - Complete
The Devil Went Down to Georgia reviews
Where he bought the soul of a Congressman, confronted a traitor, wore a spiffy sunhat, and ruined a perfectly good suit. Meg/Crowley. Now continued.
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 38,683 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 2/6/2015 - Published: 2/19/2013 - Meg, Crowley - Complete
Zombie Navidad reviews
Victor Zsasz has some unconventional and bloody interpretations of what, exactly, the reason for the season means.
Batman - Rated: M - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,440 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/24/2014
Pumpkin King reviews
Halloween is the chance for everyone, including Gotham's costumed villains, to be someone else. The Scarecrow just doesn't feel the need.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,293 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/31/2014
Revenge of the Nerds reviews
Poison Ivy and the Scarecrow have joined forces and are plotting murder. Batman would never admit it, but he almost hopes they succeed. Why? Because their intended victim is the Joker. Sequel to Nerd.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 46 - Words: 150,955 - Reviews: 354 - Favs: 187 - Follows: 149 - Updated: 9/13/2014 - Published: 1/11/2010 - Poison Ivy, The Joker, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Heedless of the Wind and Weather reviews
The Doctor faces a less than merry Christmas when he is separated from Clara and thrown in jail. To pass the time, the Doctor introduces his fellow prisoners to the joy of Earth holidays and red-nosed reindeer.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,651 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/24/2013 - 11th Doctor, Clara O. - Complete
Sweet Etiquette reviews
Getting into the real spirit of Halloween might just save your life, because demons don't appreciate floss any more than the rest of us. Only they'll do worse than egg your house.
Supernatural - Rated: M - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,855 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 6 - Published: 10/31/2013 - Lilith, Alastair - Complete
The Scarecrow and the Unicorn reviews
The Scarecrow returns home after a successful Halloween, and discovers he may not be done with masks quite yet. In fact, the Mad Hatter insists he isn't.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,533 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 12 - Published: 10/31/2013 - [Jervis T./Mad Hatter, J. Crane/Scarecrow] - Complete
Out to Lunch reviews
When all Bobby has to offer for lunch is cheese in a can and moldy leftovers, Crowley suggests a picnic. Bobby isn't exactly picnic material, but what Crowley wants, he usually gets. Except for a good glass of wine. That keeps eluding him. Some Bobby/Crowley.
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,606 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 9 - Published: 9/27/2013 - Bobby S., Crowley - Complete
Judgment Day reviews
He's evil, sadistic, and generally the last face you'd want to see greet you in the hereafter. But sometimes even Picasso with a Razor deserves a thanks for services rendered.
Supernatural - Rated: M - English - Horror/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,152 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 10 - Published: 6/5/2013 - Alastair - Complete
Fabulous Monsters reviews
Jervis is awoken in the middle of the night by the sound of screams. He follows his ears and discovers the Scarecrow has done something terrible. Jervis is then faced with an intolerable decision. Some Scarecrow/Hatter slash.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,914 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 5 - Published: 3/29/2013 - Jervis T./Mad Hatter, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Queso Warmed Over reviews
Dean picks a fight with the wrong hammer-wielding pagan god and ends up dead. Good thing Death is there to keep him company. And provide snacks.
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,768 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 12 - Published: 3/11/2013 - Dean W., Death - Complete
The Use of a Book reviews
Two madmen discuss the value of literature. It all goes down hill from there.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,721 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 3 - Published: 2/23/2013 - Jervis T./Mad Hatter, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Angels in the Garden reviews
An attempt at landscaping turns into something far more lethal when a certain stone angel shows signs of life.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Horror/Humor - Chapters: 42 - Words: 120,248 - Reviews: 368 - Favs: 208 - Follows: 139 - Updated: 1/7/2013 - Published: 11/20/2010 - Amelia P./Amy, 11th Doctor, Weeping Angels - Complete
Winter Wonderland reviews
Escaping from Arkham in the dead of winter means a long, cold walk back to your secret lair. That walk doesn't get any more pleasant when your fellow escapee can neither keep up nor shut up.
Batman - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,734 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/24/2012 - J. Crane/Scarecrow, Jervis T./Mad Hatter - Complete
For Your Viewing Pleasure reviews
Crowley's going to have movie night, even if it kills him. And by "him," Crowley means Bobby.
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,974 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 6 - Published: 12/22/2012 - Bobby S., Crowley - Complete
Anglophilia reviews
There's something wrong with Bobby. He's drinking tea, eating scones, and he's out of beer! Who's responsible for these dastardly changes to his personality? It's best Sam and Dean don't find out.
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,757 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/26/2012 - Bobby S., Crowley - Complete
Candy Apple Red reviews
Halloween isn't so much fun when you're an adult, especially when the trick-or-treaters are armed with water guns and know how to use them.
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,475 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/23/2012 - Sam W., Dean W. - Complete
Losercest reviews
After faking his death, Crowley needs a way to torment the Winchesters without anyone realizing he's still alive and kicking. So he hits them right where it hurts the weirdest: in the Wincest. If he can't kill them, he'll scar them emotionally instead.
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,944 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 10 - Published: 8/30/2012 - Crowley, Castiel - Complete
Best in Show reviews
Crowley raises the best Hellhounds and intends to make sure everyone knows it. Nothing spices up a dog show like the introduction of the King of Hell and his loyal pet.
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,582 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/25/2012 - Crowley, Dean W. - Complete
Time Enough reviews
Two captains walk into a bar. One gets shot in the face. The other learns a thing or two about inanimate objects.
Torchwood - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,551 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/2/2012 - Jack H., John H. - Complete
Ectothermic Christmas reviews
Madame Vastra and Jenny need a real Christmas miracle and the Doctor's in the business of delivering them.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,179 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 8 - Published: 12/29/2011 - Madame Vastra, Jenny - 19th Century - Complete
You Call That an Ink Defense? reviews
The Eleventh Doctor is lonely and needs a friend. Why not Zoidberg?
Crossover - Doctor Who & Futurama - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,590 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/28/2011 - 11th Doctor, J. Zoidberg - Complete
Candy from Strangers reviews
The Scarecrow has some special treats for Gotham this Halloween night.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,419 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/31/2011 - J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Stormageddon and Strax reviews
Alfie's mother isn't home and his father hasn't got mammary glands. What's a baby to do? Luckily, there's a genetically modified nurse around to help.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,426 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/1/2011 - Craig O., Commander Strax - Complete
A Thousand Years in the Making reviews
While trying to keep his head in medieval France, the Fourth Doctor meets a fellow time-traveler. This wayward traveler has been waiting centuries for such an encounter. Mild slash.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,231 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 6 - Published: 8/1/2011 - 4th Doctor, Jack H. - Complete
To Serve Man reviews
It's a cookbook! To be more precise, it's a galactic cookbook the Doctor should never have unearthed.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,241 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/29/2011 - 11th Doctor, Amelia P./Amy - Complete
Dalek in a Box reviews
Will there be peace on Earth and good will towards men this Christmas? Not if the Daleks can help it!
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,584 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/23/2010 - 10th Doctor, Daleks - Complete
Give Peace a Chance reviews
A misguided but very well-intentioned alien race tries to foster peace between the Doctor and his greatest foe. Things don't go as well as they hoped.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,106 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 5 - Published: 11/8/2010 - 10th Doctor, Daleks - Complete
Making Ends Meet reviews
An intergalactic recession strikes, and even the Daleks aren't immune. How do they continue their efforts to exterminate the last of the Time Lords when they're strapped for cash?
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,195 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/3/2010 - Daleks - Complete
Nothing Like the Original reviews
Halloween in Gotham always carries an inherent element of risk. That's what makes it so much fun. For the Scarecrow.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,910 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/26/2010 - J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Plausibility reviews
The Scarecrow doesn't care who she is, where she hails from, or where she's going. He just needs a ride. OC but no romance, I can guarantee you that.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 40 - Words: 113,359 - Reviews: 450 - Favs: 182 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 10/11/2010 - Published: 2/7/2010 - J. Crane - Complete
The Widest Generation Gap reviews
He's 600 years old and only has three kids? Highly unlikely. Ra's al Ghul discovers another branch of his family tree in a surprising place.
Batman - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,688 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 9 - Published: 7/29/2010 - Complete
Disposing of the Evidence reviews
Jasdevi steals certain sensitive items from Tyki. They have to get rid of the evidence before he can catch and eviscerate them. Flushing it seemed like a good idea at the time.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,599 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/11/2010 - Jasdero, Tyki Mikk - Complete
March Hares and Mock Turtles reviews
A mysterious and utterly irrelevant stranger drops a white rabbit off on the Mad Hatter’s doorstep. He falls in love with the spastic creature, but has no food for such an animal. So off to the pet store he goes!
Batman - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,245 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/1/2010 - Jervis T./Mad Hatter - Complete
However You Celebrate reviews
Harley feels that the Scarecrow hasn't embraced the Christmas spirit, and decides to take matters into her own hands. She decorates her heart out, bringing all the cheer she can to the Scarecrow's lair. Can he avoid killing her over it?
Batman - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,354 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 6 - Published: 12/23/2009 - Harley Quinn, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Knock, Knock reviews
Jehovah's Witnesses are spreading the word of God all over Gotham. What happens when they knock on all the wrong doors? Warning: will probably offend serious theists, as it has in the past.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 47,317 - Reviews: 132 - Favs: 177 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 12/20/2009 - Published: 12/30/2008 - Complete
Ungodly Hours of the Morning reviews
The Scarecrow breaks into Poison Ivy’s greenhouse, looking for new ingredients to use in his fear toxin. It does not go over well, especially once Ivy shows just how frightening a woman can be.
Batman - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,657 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 8 - Published: 12/8/2009 - Poison Ivy, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Nerd reviews
The Joker sets out to prove that the Scarecrow is nothing more than a nerd. Can Dr. Crane show that mad scientist and geek are not synonymous? Will he have any dignity left by the end of the Joker's experiment?
Batman - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 85,066 - Reviews: 254 - Favs: 211 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 12/6/2009 - Published: 3/5/2009 - The Joker, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Fun With Ouijas reviews
The Joker shows up in Crane’s hideout on Halloween. Why? Because the clown’s picked up a Ouija board and he’s dying to try it out. Are any of Gotham's lost souls willing to speak?
Batman - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,388 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/5/2009 - The Joker, J. Crane/Scarecrow - Complete
Indecent Exposure reviews
General Cross's womanizing and drinking finally gets him into serious trouble. Robbed of his dignity and his clothes, he's forced to make a run for it in the middle of winter. Will he ever change his ways? No.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,140 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Published: 11/3/2009 - Cross Marian - Complete
Get a Job! reviews
The Millennium Earl, sick of lazy Jasdevi getting a free ride, forces the twins to get a job. Jasdevi is stuck in a fast-food joint, flipping burgers. What happens when an unsuspecting exorcist comes seeking food?
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,952 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 22 - Published: 9/30/2009 - Jasdero, Arystar Krory III - Complete
Better Left Unanswered reviews
The Noah family tries to solve some mysteries that should just be left mysterious.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 17,124 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 9/6/2009 - Published: 7/11/2009 - Road C., Tyki Mikk - Complete