luvvturtles
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Joined 11-29-12, id: 4390305, Profile Updated: 08-17-14
Author has written 1 story for Lord of the Rings.

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I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS(or about to/want to), so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy. (unfortunately, I am crazy)
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, So I must be gay
I draw ANIME so I MUST be to a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts (It's actually called a kilt)
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers. (I hate hockey, but I love beavers although I've never actually seen one.)
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist


FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run bitch run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!"

FRIENDS: Would read ignore this


If you have ever burst out laughing about something in a book, and people look at you wierd, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have a tendency to talk/sing to yourself copy and paste this to your profile

If you have ever pulled on a door that said push, or vise versa, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever stayed up past 2 in the morning reading, copy and paste this on your profile.

If random songs pop into your head for no apparent reason, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fan fictions, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you think that Writer's Block blows, copy and paste this to your profile.

Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

People say that I'm weird, but I think that weird is strange, and strange is odd, and odd is different, and different is unique, and everyone is unique, so unique is normal, so therefore I am normal. If the same is true for you, copy this onto your profile!

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this to your profile.

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this to your profile.

If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile XD

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are reading this line, copy and paste it in ur profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you are not sure if you find these 'copy and paste things' annoying or if you love them, copy and paste this on your profile.


If You Live In America, you post this

Why America has some Issues (Yes I live there, but tough. These are clever)

1. Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America...do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'

10. Only in America...do they have drive-up ATM's with Braille lettering.


A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The te acher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."


A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honour" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."


The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."


92 percent of American teens would die if Fang told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would tell Fang to get over himself and then shove him back in your basement where he belongs. Then, you would resurrect the 92 percent of overzealous fangirls and use them as your zombie army to take over Canada and rename it Canadia where you would rule as Queen with Fang by your side as your extremely hot king who has no real political power except to stand there and make you look good.


Quotes to Live By

1.) Do not use an axe to kill a fly on your friends' head.

2.) Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

3.) When other little girls wanted to be ballerinas, I kind of wanted to be a WEREWOLF.

4.) Vampires vs. Werewolves...It's kind of like pirates vs. ninjas, but cooler

5.) Whose cruel idea was it for the word 'lisp' to have an 's' in it?

6.) Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in 'mother in law', they come out to 'Woman Hitler'?

7.) If corn oil is made from corn, where do we get baby oil from?

8.) "Wal-Mart, do they like, sell walls there?" - Paris Hilton

9.) "Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried to slam a revolving door,"- Unknown

10.) “A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.” – Unknown

11.) “Everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.” – Unknown

12.) “He who laughs last didn't get it.” – Unknown

13.) Firefighter: At one point we decided to fight fire with fire... Well...basically... your house burned even faster.

14.) Oh god! They took my freaking kidney!

15.) When I was younger, my parents encouraged me to walk and talk. Now, all they want me to do is sit down and shut up!

16.) I ran into my ex the other day, then I put the car in reverse and ran over him again.

17.) There are three kinds of people in the world; ones that can count and ones that can't count.

18.) Too often, we lose sight of life's simple pleasures. Remember, when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown, BUT it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and slap that jerk upside the head

19.) "Some people are like Slinkies. They're really good for nothing. But they still really bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs."

20.) Apparently 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. Either it's my mom or my dad. Or my older brother Collin. Or my other brother Ho-Chan-Chu. I think its Collin.

21.) Friends will always be like "well you deserve better" but best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days"

22.) You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

23.) They say guns don't kill people, people kill people, but honestly I think guns have something to do with it because if someone just stood there and said "bang," I don't think many people would be dead...

24.) I'm the kind of person that walks into a door and apologizes.

25.) Everyone has a wild side-me and my friends just prefer to make him or her public

26.) Guns don't kill people. I do.

27.) A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.

28.) He who stands on a windowsill to see how far out he can lean without falling is a moron.

29.) My imaginary friend doesn't like you either.

30.) Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

31.) Taste the rainbow- Eat CRAYONS

32.) The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

33.) The spontaneous rally will begin at 1:45.

34.) Assassinations are an extreme form of censorship.

35.) You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

36.) I'll be rich and famous when I invent something that will stab people over the Internet

37.) I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.

38.) I've got ADD and magic markers. Oh the fun I will have

39.) Somebody needs a Happy Meal.

40.) Did you just call me a bitch? Because a bitch is a dog. Dogs bark. Bark is on trees. Trees are a part of nature. And nature is beautiful. I know I'm beautiful! Thanks for the complement.

41.) “Hell won't be so bad, you know. After all, I'll be there to keep you company.”

42.) Please Note: CHRISTMAS IS CANCELED Apparently you told Santa that you have been good this year...he died laughing.

43.) “Another werewolf thing. Like most animals, we spent a large part of our lives engaged in the three Fs of basic survival. Feeding, fighting and... reproduction.”

44.) There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird.

45.) 'It's always in the last place you look' Well DUR! Because you stop looking after you find it! HELLO!

46.) I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you.

47.) Although, chainsaw beats scissors, paper, AND rock!

48.) I am going to put an end to my procrastination problem. . . Tomorrow

49.) Shut up voices! Or I'll poke you with a Q-tip again

50.) To put it nicely, I hope you choke

51.) It's you and me versus the world...we attack at dawn

52.) I'm not insensitive, I just don't care

53.) If Tylenol, Duct Tape, & a Band Aid can't fix it, you have a serious problem.

54.) The evil gnomes poked me in the bum wit a stick.

55.) Would you like a cookie? So would I.

56.) You don't have to be faster than the bear, you just have to be faster than the slowest guy running from the bear.

57.) Well the voices and I took a vote. It's unanimous; you suck.

58.) A day without sunshine is like... night.

59.) A rejected invention: Instant water! Just add water!

60.) Don't ever attempt a staring contest with a brick wall, they cheat a lot

61.) Don't make me mad...I'm known to bite at random!!

62.) Don't walk in my footsteps. I walk into walls.

63.) I am nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect!

64.) I do what cheerios tell me.

65.) I put the 'fun' in 'dysfunctional'.

66.) I'm hearing voices in my head and they don't like you! (Ha-ha just like Edward Cullen!!)

67.) I'm knocking on heavens door.. Voice in back round: Knocking? You very nearly broke the bloody thing down!! Me: That wasn’t my fault!! It was poor construction... I SWEAR!! Don’t look at me like that...

68.) If you wish on a falling star it might come true... Unless it's a meteor hurdling to earth... Then no wishes come true... Unless your wish was to be killed a meteor hurdling to earth.

69.) My Braces Are Stuck To The Carpet...

70.) Someday my prince will come he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

71.) Emmett's the strongest, Edward's the fastest, But Jasper can sit alone in a corner and still make people jealous.

72.) Okay...so there's this thing called retarded-ness and me and my friends, well...We've gone pro


List You Favorite 12 Harry Potter Characters in no particular order

1- Luna

2- Tonks

3- Draco

4- Sirius

5- Bellatrix

6- Mrs. Weasley

7- Lupin

8- Tom Riddle

9- Narcissa

10- Neville

11- Snape

12- Oliver Wood

1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fanfic before?

Mrs. Weasley and Snape? oh god no

2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?

Yeah, young Sirius must have been hot stuff. On a scale of one to ten I would say eight.

3) What would happen if Three got Four pregnant?

Draco and Sirus? I would fucking laugh my ass off

4) Do you recall any fics about Nine?

Narcissa? Nope.

5) Would Two and Eleven make a good couple?

Tonks and Snape? Ew, god no

6) Five/Eight or Five/Ten?

Bellatrix and Tom or Bellatrix and Neville? Definitely Bellatrix and Tom

7) What would happen if One walked in on Five and Six having sex?

Well if Luna walked in on Bellatrix and Mrs. Weasley she would probably just pause and then back out of the room looking for Nargles and shit.

8) Make up a summary of a Three/Ten fic.

Summary: Draco hadn't noticed the little Gryffindor until now in their last year at Hogwarts. All of a sudden the wimpy little boy from the years before had disappeared and a new Neville Longbottom had showed up with more confidence and rugged good looks. Will the Slytherin Prince be able to capture the heart of the handsome Gryffindor or will his efforts be brushed away?

that was the most disturbing thing i have written today

9) Is there any such thing as a One/Eight fluff.

Luna and Tom? God i hope not

10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve Hurt/Comfort fic.

Lupin and Oliver W.

well... Comfort Me has a nice ring to it hahaha

12) Does anyone on your friends list read Three slash?

I honestly wouldn't doubt it I mean come on, its Draco fucking Malfoy.

13) What might 3 scream at a moment of great passion?

"YES HARRY OH MY GOD!"

i am laughing so hard right now because Drarry

14) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?

For ol' Tom Riddle it would have to be Young, Wild, and Free by Snoop Dogg, Wiz Khalifa, and Bruno Mars

15) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?

Luna, Mrs. Weasley and Oliver W.

WARNING: WEIRD ASS PAIRING BUT DON'T WORRY IT GETS BETTER

16) What might be a good pick-up line for 1 to use on Two?

Luna to Tonks

well it would have to be something like "Come on, let's do it Nargle style!"

17) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?

Bellatrix

um not that long ago actually it was BellaxRodolphus because adorbs

18) "(1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (7) runs off with (4). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3)."

"Luna and Lupin were in a happy relationship until Lupin runs off with Sirius. Luna, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Snape and a brief unhappy affair with Oliver Wood, then follows the wise advice of Bellatrix and finds true love with Draco."

well i personally only ship Lupin and Sirius in this whole paragraph

So marks the end of the sometimes disturbing Harry Potter fic quiz.

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Obsidian by x-Punch-Buggy-Red-x reviews
When a dragon egg hatches for Katharean, her entire world is turned upside down. After fleeing the home of her oppressive, Galbatorix-loving father, she meets the mysterious Murtagh. Can he help her reach Eragon and the Varden before Galbatorix's men find her? Or is he really all he seems? AU MurtaghxOC. Rated T for now...this summary is abysmal.
Inheritance Cycle - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 50 - Words: 116,594 - Reviews: 338 - Favs: 179 - Follows: 208 - Updated: 7/21 - Published: 12/31/2008 - Eragon S., Murtagh
Politics is a Bargain Between Beggars by CountessCadhla reviews
Valdis watched Murtagh as he scanned the horizon for Thorn. Below them, the Empire's army marched. Where would this path end?
Inheritance Cycle - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 63,458 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 84 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 10/18/2015 - Published: 6/23/2011 - Murtagh
Reading Nico's Life Story by candyland7 reviews
Kinda like a reading the books story, but instead of Percy's story getting read it Nico's. It goes from Nico's mom dieing too after the Giant War. There are two OC's one is Tiana Percy's little sister same mom and dad, Ambrosia a daughter of Hermes. There is also myself in the story. This story is rated T for depressing scenes. DISCONTINUED
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 16 - Words: 27,006 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 2/19/2014 - Published: 10/26/2013 - Nico A., Percy J., Thalia G., OC
Young Love by MomoTurtles reviews
Next Generation. New girl transfers to Hogwarts from Durmstrang, they find out that the triwizard tournament is going to be this year. I suck at summaries so just read.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,720 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/15/2013 - Albus S. P., OC
Chasing The Crown by hislastvow reviews
America is an Elite, one of only six girls left in the competition. When a rebel attack leads to disastrous consequences, will it lead to a change of heart? Aspen or Maxon? Love and poverty or love and a crown? Hope or no hope? (My version of what I would like The Elite to be like) DISCLAIMER-I DO NOT OWN 'THE SELECTION'. ALL RIGHTS GO TO KIERA CASS. PHOTO CREDIT TO @UNEXPOSEDSCARS
Selection Trilogy, Kiera Cass - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 37 - Words: 63,241 - Reviews: 614 - Favs: 157 - Follows: 148 - Updated: 7/18/2013 - Published: 3/2/2013 - America S., Maxon S. - Complete
A new life, and a new love by maximumwolf242 reviews
Max has been abused by her step father Jeb for eight years, when a mysterious boy moves in next door saves her from being stabbed will he help max bring her abuser to justice, and will this mysterious boy give her the life she wants and deserves? rated for violence, language, and lemons...lots of lemons.
Maximum Ride - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 75 - Words: 203,651 - Reviews: 335 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 167 - Updated: 4/12/2013 - Published: 7/12/2012 - Fang, Max - Complete
I'll Look After You by lauralulubee reviews
Katniss joins the slave trade in order to ensure her family's welfare, bought by the Mellarks, it is now up to Peeta to protect her from the dangers of the new world she is forced to live. In an effort to stay together they find themselves discovering adventure, scandal, secrets and of course love. AU. LEMONS. Mature themes.
Hunger Games - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 42 - Words: 121,821 - Reviews: 856 - Favs: 516 - Follows: 412 - Updated: 1/13/2013 - Published: 10/22/2012 - Katniss E., Peeta M. - Complete
Now or Forever by lottielovebuzz reviews
Grace Byrne started off with a brilliant life, but when her parents and her fiancé die, that life is turned upside down. She's thrown into a life of taking drastic measures, and taking the only job a woman on Tortuga can do. Yet, when she meets an understanding pirate, she realises that hope may not be lost, and that he could give her the freedom and love she wants. JS/OC
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 48 - Words: 115,097 - Reviews: 335 - Favs: 270 - Follows: 165 - Updated: 12/1/2012 - Published: 11/29/2010 - [Capt. Jack Sparrow, OC] J. Gibbs - Complete
It Was A Lie by DirectorCarmichael reviews
What if Katniss was lying when she told Peeta it was all an act? How does Gale react to the news that Katniss and Peeta are together? Heavy, heavy Everlark. This is a complete re-telling of Catching Fire and Mockingjay. Will change major events, relationships, and the overall storyline. Wildly OOC Katniss. A happier Hunger Games. Rating changed to 'M'.
Hunger Games - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 48 - Words: 213,991 - Reviews: 873 - Favs: 703 - Follows: 366 - Updated: 11/19/2012 - Published: 10/11/2012 - Katniss E., Peeta M. - Complete
The Captain's Cabin Boy by linalove reviews
"So, Joseph..." he started with a smile, "Josh." the nickname rolled off his tongue slowly while his eyes shone mischievously, "Now I understand why there wasn't anything visible in those breeches." he commented wickedly while she stared at him.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 35 - Words: 119,830 - Reviews: 1931 - Favs: 1,382 - Follows: 662 - Updated: 10/30/2012 - Published: 5/5/2012 - Capt. Jack Sparrow, OC - Complete
Hades & Persephone by LadyEbony84 reviews
"The Rape of Persephone" in Greek is actually named "The Abduction of Persephone". An abduction sometimes can be consentual. Myths in time get twisted losing their names and meaning. This is my attempt to retell the most popular love story in greek mythology.
Greek Mythology - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 51,964 - Reviews: 187 - Favs: 528 - Follows: 166 - Updated: 9/20/2012 - Published: 5/21/2012 - Hades, Persephone - Complete
The Mating Games by ktface3 reviews
"And so it was decreed that each year, the twelve districts of Panem shall offer up in tribute the men and women aged 18 years who have not pair bonded with a mate, to compete to be deemed worthy enough to procreate." AU, Peeta's POV, note the M rating. This fic now has a beautiful banner, made by Ro Nordmann! Copy and paste and take out the spaces: h t t p :/tinyurl . com/c99udmf
Hunger Games - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 24 - Words: 102,616 - Reviews: 2129 - Favs: 2,177 - Follows: 1,781 - Updated: 6/26/2012 - Published: 3/11/2012 - Peeta M., Katniss E. - Complete
Girl On Fire, Who's Your Desire? by belladonnablush reviews
Katniss knew the magic Peeta's hands could do in the bakery, but an argument with Gale makes her realize she is in love with the baker & wants his hands on her. But loving Peeta has costly consequences for herself & others in her life, including Gale. A tale of decisions & repercussions, love & loss, romance & lemons, action & angst. Katniss/Peeta, w/ some Katniss/Gale situations.
Hunger Games - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 33 - Words: 82,125 - Reviews: 366 - Favs: 530 - Follows: 370 - Updated: 5/25/2012 - Published: 4/4/2012 - Katniss E., Peeta M. - Complete
Taming The Wild by L8Bleumr reviews
*COMPLETE* She was born with only one purpose, to fight. But when Legolas tries to harness her, she finds it difficult to submit for the sake of their love. She must stay true to her namesake.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 40 - Words: 116,622 - Reviews: 142 - Favs: 238 - Follows: 93 - Updated: 12/26/2011 - Published: 11/16/2011 - Legolas - Complete
Two Captains by Tulio and Miguel reviews
After being stripped of her title and thrown off of her own ship, Captain Ryenne Caelar makes one huge mistake: getting on the wrong side of Captain Jack Sparrow. And now, she finds she needs his help more than ever. Complete - now with alternate ending.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 60 - Words: 214,938 - Reviews: 625 - Favs: 281 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 5/31/2011 - Published: 11/8/2003 - Capt. Jack Sparrow - Complete
Duty Versus Love by Light-Eco-Sage reviews
:COMPLETE: For the Avatar, choice is merely an illusion. Now Aang must face the ultimate choice a second time: between love and his duty to the world. Rated: Mature. Romance/sexuality. Canon pairings. Kataang, Maiko, George, The Doph
Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 51 - Words: 140,305 - Reviews: 838 - Favs: 573 - Follows: 251 - Updated: 1/28/2011 - Published: 9/22/2009 - [Aang, Katara] unknown 9 - Complete
Ever and Ever by WildflowerWhisper reviews
Rohan is withering under the weight of the War. Calahdra Medlinniel, however, is falling in love. A Shieldmaiden of Rohan, Calahdra is young, damaged, and driven by duty. Yet how could she give her life for her people when she now has so much to live for?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 43 - Words: 124,356 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 206 - Follows: 120 - Updated: 1/14/2011 - Published: 7/8/2009 - Legolas - Complete
UnOfficial Fan Fiction Lingo Dictionary by UniqaChica reviews
Just now getting into fan fiction? All these strange terms getting to your head? Look no further! Now updated with more terms and clearer definitions.
Parodies and Spoofs - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 432 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 15 - Published: 9/6/2010 - Complete
A Spell, a Rebel Yell by Elizabeth Cicero reviews
Jack is secretly preparing for a new oceanic conquest, when he stumbles upon a scene that changes everything for his roughly stable mind. Eva is a girl who has lost her way in the only place she's ever known, and desires to find it again on the open sea.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 31 - Words: 108,272 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 12 - Published: 8/25/2009 - Capt. Jack Sparrow - Complete
Consequentially Yours by Nyruserra reviews
The war is over, and the recovering Wizarding Community adopts a new Marriage Law to cope with the sudden rise of bloodsicknesses. Poor Oliver, he's about to find out that the consequences of doing the right thing can get very out of hand! Not HBP Com.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 156,246 - Reviews: 524 - Favs: 790 - Follows: 344 - Updated: 7/24/2009 - Published: 3/12/2005 - [Hermione G., Oliver W.] Draco M., Charlie W. - Complete
The Dunedain Princess by Scarlett Witch reviews
While the fellowship leave to fight the evil of the world, one woman tries to forget the worries of her past and struggles to understand the meaning of family, forgiveness and love. Finally Complete
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 41 - Words: 76,472 - Reviews: 298 - Favs: 300 - Follows: 132 - Updated: 7/5/2007 - Published: 1/4/2005 - Legolas, Aragorn - Complete
Quest for Identity by MegaKitty reviews
A human girl joins the fellowship and discovers who she is. NOW DIVIDED INTO CHAPTERS. AragornOC.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 38 - Words: 67,400 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 496 - Follows: 93 - Updated: 11/19/2006 - Published: 11/18/2006 - Aragorn, Frodo B. - Complete
All Is Fair In Love and War reviews
!REVISED! A mysterious woman comes to the Prancing Pony looking for a Ranger called Strider. Through some convincing and sarcastic comments she agrees to join him in escorting the Hobbits to Rivendell where she must face her past as well as her future. Tenth Walker Story (sorry lol) AragornxOC
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 15,330 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 10/27/2013 - Published: 12/5/2012 - [Aragorn, OC] [Legolas, Elf]