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Joined 12-14-12, id: 4417005, Profile Updated: 09-29-14
Author has written 1 story for Harry Potter.

Hey everyone who is reading this on my awesome page of my stuff! I am going to tell you some important things about me! :)

Any other websites I am on: FictionPress - andrea1489, YouTube - thebloodyredstorm13, Deviant Art - Phoenix-Faia (might be updated if I remember any more)

Gender: Female (alright with being called dude or mate)

Age: 13 (almost 14 and I have been told I have quite a wide vocabulary)

Height: Short (all good things come in small packages)

Eye Colour: Blue or green (depends on the lighting sometimes)

Hair Colour: Blonde (want to get red hair when I turn 16)

Fav. Hobbies: Gaming (*cough* Minecraft *cough*), Fanfiction and YouTube. (rarely but sometimes, anime is one of them too)

Fav. YouTube Channel: Most likely, Markaplier or Double or RayWillamJohnson :)

Fav. TV Show: Teen Wolf (#Dylan O'Brien)

What I would do if I could at the Moment: Go to Comic Con and see the Teen Wolf and Harry Potter panels.

All of these things are a part of me and if you don't like it well stuff you... oh! I am also Australian! :) That's enough for now and if you have any questions or just want to chat (because you think we would get a long) just PM me. Also I seem to better at writing my own stories, mostly horror, but I am trying to re-do my fanfiction story since I wasn't doing to well with it but it will have the same plot.

These are where I will put things that I get from other profiles or see somewhere that I like. ENJOY!!!

Life Sayings:

"I'm too busy getting lost to read a map!"

"A learned blockhead is a greater blockhead than an ignorant one."

"When life hands you lemons, make grape juice and sit around laughing while everyone wonders how you did it."

"You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same."

"Women who behave rarely make history."

"I love talking about nothing. It's the only thing I know anything about."

Things to do on an Elevator

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"

2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.

3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.

4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.

5) MEOW occasionally.

6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly

7) SAY -DING at each floor.

8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.

9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."

11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"

12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."

14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.

15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.

17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"

18) DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"

19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.

20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.

21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.

22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.

23) Make car race noises when someone gets on or off.

24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.

25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"

26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.

28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it.

29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."

30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.

31. Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.

32. Also in your bell boy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.

33. Ask, "Did you feel that?"

34. Tell people that you can see their aura.

35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."

36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time..."

1.Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18 and find line 4.

from 'The Wish List' by Eoin Colfer (haven't read it yet) - might trade.' (this is said by someone, the whole bit they say is 'No. A specific soul. I thought if you had her at the Perlies, )

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can... what do you find?

A box of cheap face paint. :)

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?

Me playing a borrowed copy, from a friend, of 'Blaze Blue - Calamity Trigger' on my PS3. (what? it was on a TV :D)

4. Without looking guess what time it is?

8:00 am

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?

8:06 am (so close...)

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?

The traffic, my sister watching a TV show, the fridge... (I swear sometimes I have super hearing..)

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?

Yesterday night - coming home from watching the new Captain America movie. (GO MARVEL!!!)

8. Before you started this survey, what were you looking at?

insaneshadowfangirl's bio. (Insanity Fangirl! GO INSANE PEOPLE!)

9. What are you wearing?

My PJ'S (Broncos shirt with Hawaiian shorts)

10. Did you dream last night?

Everyone has a dream every night, it just depends if they remember or not :) (I can't remember last nights :P)

11. When did you last laugh?

Last night... but it was more me hysterically laughing because I'm crazy then then something was funny...

12. What is on the walls of the room you're in?

A photo of my family before I was born :/ (A.K.A When my sisters where my age)

13. Seen anything weird lately?

Creepypasta videos :) ... Don't hurt me Mickey Mouse... (my childhood is ruined :P)

14. What do you think of this quiz?


16. If you became a multi-millionaire over night, what would you buy?

The Teen Wolf TV show! (TAKE THAT JEFF DAVIS!!)

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know.

I more messed up in the head when I'm the normal looking one in my group :P (they don't even know...)

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics...
'Get rid of racism, sexism, etc. I HATE MEN WHO THINK THEY'RE BETTER THAN WOMEN! ANDI HATE HOMOPHOBES TOO!! MY BIG BRUDDER IZ GAY, AND I TAKE MAJOR OFFENCE TO GAY JOKES!!!! I actually attacked my boyfriend once when he cracked one. Physically!!! On school grounds!'

(This was Insanity's answer but I agree with her on this... mostly the Homophobes bit. I have a bi. friend and for all I know I'M bi! You never know...)

19. A quote that you love/live by...

"Love the love that's been loved all over you" - Tyler Posey in Teen Wolf thing (I only heard him say, I didn't watch the actual thing :P)

21. Imagine your first child's a girl, what would you call her?


22. Imagine your first child's a boy, what would you call him?


27. What's a word that rhymes with "DOOR"?

more, poor, law, nor, tour,...

28. Favorite planet?

UB313 :) (that's a planet that in grade 4 we learnt about and I'm the only one who could remember that name, and I still can TO THIS DAY!)

29. Who is the fourth person on your missed call list on your mobile phone?

My Dad

30. What's your favorite ring on your phone?

I have a LOT of ringtones just give me a sec... ah! 'The lavender Town them' ! - I normally have it on vibrate though :/

31. What shirt are you wearing?

A broncos shirt I got from my cuz' (cuz' means my cousin :P)

32. The brand of shoes you are currently wearing?

I'm wearing socks! bet brand to wear in the house if I do say so myself! :) - But my fav. brand of shoe if 'Converse'. I only have one pair :(

33. Bright or Dark room?

Bright - It's day time :/

34. What do you think of the person who took this survey before you?

She just beats me in the crazy department :P (but I'm still more disturbed :D)

35. What were you doing at midnight last night?
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz... (I agree with Insane...)

36. What did the last text message on your mobile say?

It was a pic that read 'Do not interrupt me when I'm talking to myself'

37. Where's your mailbox?
to my house gate

38. What's a word you say a lot?

Can it be a phrase? anyway... - 'You baka/idiot... (baka means idiot in Japanese)

Or perhaps in Slytherin

You'll make your real friends,

Those cunning folks use any means

To achieve their ends.


Slytherin's cardinal traits are ambition, cunning and determination. Like the Gryffindor House, Slytherins are emotionally volatile. In contrast, however, Slytherins are much less dominant and assertive, and less extroverted in general. Rather than expressing these emotions outwardly, Slytherins direct them inward or act in a passive aggressivemanner. Both Gryffindor and Slytherin are much more driven to succeed than the other two houses: Gryffindor out of pride and Slytherin out of ambition.

Slytherins are also much more pragmatic than the other houses and more adept at manipulating people. A key trait would be a low level of agreeableness: Slytherins are more pessimistic, more distrustful than most, and more likely to attribute negative motivations to people. So although Slytherins experience a wide range of emotions, due to their distrustful views of people and skeptical worldview, they are less expressive and more likely to appear cold or distant unless provoked.

A Slytherin's ambitious nature comes out in different ways depending on what is important to the individual person. It could lead them to try to achieve top marks (if intellect and schooling is important to them) but it could also be directed at social settings or towards athletic endeavors.

I may be Slytherin, but don't hold it against me! It just means I'm super awesome, like Draco Malfoy!

What's this thing you call 'normal'??? Is it CoNTagiOus??! OMG!!! DON'T TOUCH ME!!!

... I might catch your 'normal.' *shudders*

Whoever said nothing was impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.
Or riding a snail to the sun.
Or stapling water to a tree.
Or teaching a walnut to speak German.

Average Person:"I scream, you scream, we all scream for ic-"
Me: "Dylan O'Brien!!!!!!"

I did not hit you... I simply high-five your face... really hard...


- Jumping into toxic waste does NOT give you super powers.

- Drink lots of coffee. That way, you can do dumb things faster with more energy!

- Always give 100% at school/work: (12% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 20% Thursday, 5% Friday)

- If your parents leave you unattended for more than 11 minutes in Cairns Shopping Mall, the security guards WILL attempt to sell you to the circus. I am being gravely serious with you. Seriously.

- Never go to bed, angry. Stay awake and plot your revenge.


Call dog "dog".

Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

Begin all sentences with "oh la la!" Speak only in a "robot" voice.

Wear pants backwards.

Ask people what gender they are.

Ask the waitress for an extra seat for imaginary friend.

Sing along at opera.

Mow lawn with scissors.

Honk and wave to strangers.


Professor Flitwick … does not know where Snow White is.

Professor Snape … has no wish to get in touch with his ‘feminine side’.

Professor Lupin … has no need for a flea collar. Ever.

Professor Moody … the best ‘teaching’ Hogwarts has seen in a while.

Professor McGonagall … does not take herself too seriously. It is a bad idea to tell her.

Professor Dumbledore … should be referred to as ‘Professor’, ‘Headmaster’ or ‘Sir’, not ‘Dude’, ‘My Liege’ or ‘Tim the Enchanter’.

Harry Potter … is more Emo than Draco Malfoy.

Draco Malfoy … disagrees.

Hermione Granger … has PMS and a wand.

Ron Weasley … is very afraid.

Luna Lovegood … is perfectly sane, thanks very much.

Ginny Weasley … wants her Hogwarts toilet seat.

Fred Weasley … knows if he and his twin giggle at an idea for more than fifteen seconds, they may assume that it’s against the rules and therefore should not carry it out.

George Weasley … knows he and his twin will carry it out anyway and will not be remotely sorry.

Lily Evans … swears she is not in love with James Potter.

James Potter … doesn’t believe her.

Remus Lupin … would prefer less jokes about ‘his time of the month’.

Sirius Black … killed by drapery.

Andromeda Black … is going to marry a muggle – screw the consequences.

Bellatrix Black … is quietly going insane. (like we didn't already know that)

Narcissa Black … would like a new hairbrush.

Lucius Malfoy … does not like to be referred to as ‘Luscious Mouthful’.

Voldemort … does not think it would be funny if Harry Potter were to put on earmuffs and pulled out a mandrake at the Final Battle.

Gryffindors … will jump off the cliff.

Slytherins … will push someone else off.

Hufflepuffs… will call five hundred others and build a staircase.

Ravenclaws … will get hold of a flying carpet.


"If Death Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade I will not point at the sky and shout TO THE BAT MOBILE!"

"I will not charm a thousand shampoo bottles to follow Snape around, throwing themselves at his head, and then claimed a potted plant told me to do it."

"I will not tell everyone that I overheard my sister saying, 'So I was like, 'Avada Kadavra!' and he was like, 'Dead.' "

"I will not ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling."

"I will not tell the first years that Hagrid is an evil giant and he will eat all of them up."

"I will not call Draco Malfoy the amazing...bouncing...Ferret."

"I will not refer to Hermione as 'Ron's pet night-troll.'"

"I will not give Remus Lupin a flea collar for his birthday"

"I am not authorized to negotiate a peace treaty with Voldemort."

"I will not make any jokes about Lupin and his time of the month."

"I will not say 'dude, get a life' to the Dark Lord."

"I will not ask Professor Snape why he stole Batman's cape."

"I will not scare the Arithmancy students with my calculus book."

"I will not spread rumors saying, 'When Voldemort goes to bed he checks his closet for Mrs. Weasley.' "

"I will not tell Penelope Clearwater that Percy wouldn't recognize a joke if it dances naked in front of him wearing Dobby's tea cozy."

"I will not sing "We're off to see the wizard!" when sent to the headmasters office."

"I will not send You-Know-Who a letter saying, 'I have eight Horcruxes, take that Voldy!' "

"I will not call Professor Flitwick Master Yoda."

"I will not bring a magic eight ball to Divination."

"I will not tell everyone that Snape is the illegitimate child of Professor Sprout and Dumbledore."

"If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of the situation and draw a Dark Mark on their arm."

"I am not allowed to make lightsaber sounds with my wand."

"I will not attempt to slide down all the banisters in Hogwarts."

"I will not draw a twirly mustache on the face of the Fat Lady in permanent marker... ... and then proceed to do the same to all the other portraits in the castle."

"I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintballing."

"I will not follow potions instructions in reverse order just to see what happens."

"I will not give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him that they are real animals." "I will not dress up as Voldemort for Halloween."

"I will not teach the house-elves to impersonate Paris Hilton."

"I will not kidnap the Marauders and sell them to an animal circus."

"I will not take Neville skydiving."

"I will not tell the first years that running up to Draco Malfoy screaming and hugging him will bring them good luck."

"I will not try to check Luna into St. Mungos."

"I will not nickname Hagrid 'The BFG.'"

"I will not print out Dramione pictures and stick them all over the castle."

"I will not book Moaning Myrtle therapy sessions."

"I will not try to get the Dementors to wear hot pink cloaks."

"I will not give Severus Snape lots of hair care products on his birthday."

"I will not change the Slytherin Common room password to 'Gryffindor Rules'"

These next few are from a Fanfiction entitled "I've Been Naughty" - CHECK IT OUT!!

"I am not allowed to bleach professor Snape's hair."

"Telling first-year muggleborns that the only way to protect against the monster in the Chamber of Secrets is to dress in neon yellow onsie, a blindfold and combat boots is not appropriate."

"I am not allowed to braid Hagrids beard. . . . Nor can I dread lock Dumbledore's, no matter how much he liked it."

"Putting temporary tattoo's of the dark mark on hufflepuffs' arms while they sleep is not funny. . . . Videotaping them when they wake up and selling the tapes is also wrong."

"Doing exorcisms on ghost is not allowed, especially on Professor Binns."

"Polyjuicing myself as Voldemort, hiding behind a door and jumping out and screaming "boo" when Harry Potter walks by is wrong and malicious."

"Telling Cho Chang that Cedric cheated on her before he dies, with me, is mean. That goes double if I am a male".

"Asking people if they want to see my puppy named fluffy, and then leading them to the Forbidden corridor and locking them inside could be deadly and is not allowed. That is why it is forbidden."

"I am not allowed to dye Ron's hair green. . . . Nor Draco's red. . . . Or Harry's blue, Hermione's purple, Dean's yellow, Fred and George's rainbow. . ."

"I am not allowed to own or use hair dye."

"Professor Flitwick is not a munchkin and asking him where the lollipop guild is, is inappropriate."

"Forcing the entire house-elf staff in Hogwarts to wear socks and get fired is not funny and hurts the house-elves more than I will ever know."

"Saying I am Professor Snape's slave is incorrect and nobody cares if it is my favourite fantasy."

"I'm not allowed to write Draco Malfoy a highly-suggestive love letter and say it was from Hagrid."

"I'm not allowed to tell Professor Trelawney that I just Saw her death and it was in 2 minutes and 42 seconds."

"Sacrificing Hufflepuffs to the giant squid is not allowed under any circumstances whatsoever."

"I am not allowed to curse the Ravenclaws so that every book they try to read turns into a porno."

"I am not allowed to tell Ron that Ginny is dating a 40 year old alcoholic; it is none of my business. It doesn't matter that I'm saying it because it is true and I'm worried."

"Fred and George are not clones and neither one is going to become evil and kill me. Accusing them that they will is obnoxious."

"Hermione is not related to a beaver, nor a squirrel or chipmunk. Implying that she is, is mean and rude."

"A dog bone is not an appropriate gift for Sirius Black. . . . nor is catnip for McGonagall, . . . A collar and lead for Professor Lupin is crossing a line."

"Filch in a tutu is not an attractive sight and I should refrain from cursing him to wear one."

"Forcing any person/staff/creature in the school to switch gender is not allowed."

"Calling Pansy a 'Pug-faced bitch' will result in punishment. It doesn't matter if she is out of earshot. It does not matter if I think it is unfair that I should be punished for 'telling the truth'."

"Spreading rumors that Harry is pregnant with Draco's love child is not only stupid but impossible."

"Telling the Muggle Studies teacher that in the Muggle Schools kids sleep with their teachers is not right."

"I am not allowed to put unknown ingredients into the lunch goblets to 'See what would happen'."

"I'm bored is not an excuse to charm paper balls to chase Professor Flitwick around the classroom."

"I am not allowed to put any type of laxative in anything someone could consume."

"I am not allowed to keep a creature from the Forbidden Forest under my bed, especially if it is much larger than my bed."

"McGonagall is not having a love affair with Miss Norris. End of story."

"I'm not allowed to ask Professor Snape if we are making a lubricant every time he announces that we are making a new potion."

"They have not, nor will they ever teach me to transfigure a penis and I must stop asking them to do so."

"Charming Ron's clothes to run away from him screaming 'RAPE!!' is wrong, no matter how many people laughed when he ran into the Great Hall naked except for a towel."

"Dragons are illegal. The police don't care that you already bought a year's supply of food and it is not refundable. The dragon will be confiscated."

"I am not allowed to handcuff together students or teachers to each other. . . . Saying that the only way to unlock them is by kissing for 40 minutes straight is mean, especially when you pretend to throw away the keys in front of them."

"I am not allowed to use compulsion charms to make the Slytherins sing "It's Okay To Be Gay" in the Great Hall."

"I am not allowed to use unforgivable on any living person. . . No reason is acceptable, even if they annoyed me."

"School wide orgies are not 'Interhouse Relations'."

Just because I am able to bend and kiss my own rear-end, does not mean I should.

I am not the direct descendant of Godhhel Hirrefn, the man who invented sex. . . . nor am I related to Haley Visind, the woman who created the idea of death.

I am not allowed to tell Harry that Voldemort changed his dark mark and that it now a purple flower that sits on the left shoulder. . . . Placing said mark on Hermione and Ron when they aren't paying attention is wrong.

Draco Malfoy is not a girl, no matter how girl he acts, and taking his clothes of with magic in public is rude and will be punished with detention.

"Professor Snape is not my father and crawling into his lap and calling him daddy is not appropriate."

"No part of the staff is related to me in anyway so I will not be getting extra credit on homework."

"Bringing Harry Potter series to Hogwarts to cheat on my Divination test is horrible, especially if I leave it in a place I know Harry will see."

Just because they are ghost it doesn't mean that their feelings can't get hurt.

I am not allowed to throw water on lord Voldemort to see if he will melt, that will result in my death and no one will feels sorry for me.

Seamus does not have a drinking problem because he is Irish, telling him to go to AA meetings is very insulting and I will stop doing it immediately.

I am to sit at my own house table, every day and every meal . . . no exceptions.

If I call professor Umbridge, professor "UmBitch" I will get detention, even if I am not talking to her directly. She is still my superior and deserve me respect, no matter how stupid she really is.

Attempting to kill any student, teacher or creature will get me expelled and have an extensive stay in Azkaban.

Filling the entire Great Hall with Jell-O is not allowed, even if it is cherry and nobody doesn't like cherry.

I am not allowed to shrink any of the professors, and selling "pocket-sized Professors" to other children is wrong.

I am not allowed to give twenty different people polyjuice potion with either Fred or George Weasley's hair in it making it so we have 22 identical people running around. . . . I am not supposed to have polyjuice potion to begin with and I am not allowed to use it . . . ever.

I must share the dorm with my roommates. Locking them out of the room for the entire night will get me punished, especially if I get rid of their possessions for more room for mine. It does not matter if I think I need more space.

There is no such thing as "Hump a HufflePuff Day" . . . Nor "Grope a Gryffindor Day" . . . "Spank a Slytherin Day" and "Rub a Ravenclaw Day" also don't exist.

I should stop saying they do. I also need to stop making the cards, t-shirts, mugs, and hats that go along with each day.

House- elves are not my personal slave, making them rub my feet when ever is sit down is wrong. . . . making them carry around my book 'just for the heck of it' will also result in me getting in trouble.

Dumbledore is not Santa, telling first years that he is, is rude. When addressing a teacher I should call them Professor, sir or ma'am . . . Master, mistress, lord, lady, and God are not correct ways to talk to a teacher.

When I ask Harry if I may ride his broom I MUST be talking about his Firebolt, any other interpretation will be considered sexual harassment.

I am not allowed to give miss Norris cat nip and then let her loose in the Great Hall.

I did not see Fred George and Percy having a incestuous gay threesome last night, or ever.

I am not allowed to say that I created a spell that will give you the answer to any question you ask and cannot be detected on a test. . . . saying that I have a spell that will let a person have sex with whoever they want with no consequences. . . . selling the spells for 10 galleons (or any amount of money) is not right. . . . especially if the spell i do give them makes the words "I am a desperate loser" float above their head for two days.

Owning a Giant is illegal, just because I am in school does not mean I won't go to jail.

Sending any of the Weasley children birth control, whether anonymously or not, and saying it's for their mom is in bad taste and will be punished... ... Sending Mr. Weasley a brochure about vasectomies is wrong, and can easily be traced back to me.

Using red spray paint to paint "the Chamber of Fantasies is open again" is mean and will cause some people to have bad nightmares.

The activities that happen in porno's are not real, I am not allowed to recreate them.

When asked to make a potion I MUST use the ingredients and instructions that are given to me BY THE PROFESSOR.

Sending Harry a love letter signed by Voldemort is disturbing and horrifying, and should be avoided.

When writing in red ink I am not allowed to tell first years that it is blood of those who asked me annoying questions.

Acting like I am possessed by an animal or anybody is wrong and frightening. . . . It is also not an excuse for not getting my homework done.

75 percent of teenagers would cry their eyes out if Justin Bieber decided to jump off a building. Copy and paste this into your profile if you're in the 25 percent that would be shouting "DO A FLIP".

A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

*She gives him a big hug*

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love.

98% of the girls in the world would die if Robert Pattinson was kidnapped. 1.9% of them would be laughing their socks off. 0.1% of them would be snickering and poking their new hostage with a stick.

Things I’m Not Allowed to do at Hogwarts

1) The Giant Squid is not an appropiate date to the Yule Ball

2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office

3) I am not allowed to take out a life insureance policy on Harry Potter

4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show you the pointy hat trick

5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar

6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination

7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after my lucky charms"

8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this years Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.

9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus's "time of the month"

10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand

11) I am not allowed to give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals

12) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force"

13) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work"

14) I will not give you my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot

15) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it

16) I will not lock the Slytherin's and Gryffindor's in a room togther and bet on which House will come out alive

17) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Kinghts of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast

18) I am not allowed to declare an offical "Hug A Slytherin Day"

19) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways

20) It is not nessisary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor

21) I will not use the phrase, "Get a Life" when talking to Voldemort

22) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy

23) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling

24) I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning-Myrtle an eye-full"

25) I will not make, "OMGWTF" a spell

26) It is not nessicary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate

27) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways, not even on Halloween

28) I will not poke Hufflepuff's with spoons, nor shall I insist that their colors indicate that they're "covered in bees"

29) "I've heard every joke possible about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge

30) I will not go to class skyclad

31) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "Told you I was Hard Core"

32) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm, not even if they are in Slytherin

33) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers

34) I will not start every potions class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion

35) I will not call the Weasly twins, "bookends"

36) I will not call the Patil twins, "bookends"

37) I will not call the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher Kenny, even if he is wearnig an orange anorak

38) There is no such thing as a were-thylacine

39) I will not give Luna Lovegood Coast-To-Coast AM transcripts

40) Tricking a school House Elf to strip of it's clothing does not make it mine. Yes, even when I yell out "PWND!"

41) I do not weigh the same as a duck

42) I do not have an Edward Cullen Patronous

43) I will not lick Trevor

44) Gryffindor courage does not come in bottles labeled, "Firewhiskey"

45) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween

46) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself too seriously

47) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knights Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions

48) I am not the King of the Potato Poeple and I do not have a flying carpet

49) "To conqur the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice

50) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God

51) I will not tell Peeves to throw eggs at Professor Snape because "Fred would want you to"

52) I will not show the students "Potter Puppet Pals"

53) I will not convince the Fat Lady to use "I solemnly swear I am up to no good" as the password.

54) I am not allowed to steal Luna Lovegood's shoes

55) I will not call Professor Snape a self-secluded Momma's Boy in class (aw...)

56) I will not use magic to hypnotize my crush at campus to think they're in love with me

57) I will not make "Perfect Symmetry" into a spell

58) I will not prank the Slytherin house as revenge for them insulting my friend

58) I will not ask my teacher why Voldemort does not have a nose

59) I will not ask professor Flitwick why he is so short.

60) I am not allowed to put a Dr. Filibuster Firework under Professor Flitwick's chair to see if he'll fly into the air cartoon-style.

70) I will not in anyway, shape or form, steal one of the weasly twins products that I know the antidote to, and try to kiss my crush saying its the only way to get rid of it.

If you read all of these, post it into your profile and add another! (70 is mine :))

This is weird, but interesting! If you can raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed erveylteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! Paste this to yuor porifle if you can raed this!

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation..

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one..

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.

On a can of cashews:
Warning: May contain cashews.
(Really? I never would have guessed!)

Copy & Paste this to your profile if you think those are all extremely stupid labels.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, Phantom-Figure, Weird Romantic Gal, Devilchild93,TheGirlWhoDancesAtTheMoonlight, Angel of Darkness Thirteen, Ghostgal4, Aurora Borealis 97, The Icechild, insaneshadowfangirl, andrea1489

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you ever pushed on a door that said "Pull" copy this into your profile.

Weird is good, strange it bad, and odd is when you don't know what to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this into your profile!

if you have ever annoyed people just for fun copy this to your profile.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this and put it in your profile

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile.

EMBRACE THE WEIRDNESS! If you embrace the weirdness, then copy and paste this onto your profile.

Too many teenagers have smoked or tried Marijuana, if you haven't, put this in your profile. DENY THE DRUGS! DENY THEM!

If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile.

If you realize that copying and pasting things in your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.

If you think Writer's Block is evil, put this in your profile.


I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back.

The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.

The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll."

Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''

The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''

Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.

The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.

Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.

"It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."

I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry.

But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there."

His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''

My heart nearly stopped.

The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall."

Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't

forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister."

Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.

I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''

"OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for

the doll and even some spare money.

The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!"

Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that

mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!''

"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.''

"My mommy loves white roses."

A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.

I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.

Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.

The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy?

Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away.

I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.

She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.

I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister

is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.

My name is Lily.
I am three.
My eyes are swollen,
I cannot see.
I must be stupid,
I must be bad.
What else could have made
my daddy so mad?
I wish I were better,
I wish I weren't ugly.
Then maybe my mommy
would still want to hug me.
I can't speak at all,
I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
all the day long.
When I awake I'm all alone,
the house is dark.
My folks aren't home,
when my mommy does come,
I'll try and be nice,
so maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight.
Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.
I hear him, see him.
My name he calls.
I press myself
Against the wall.
I try and hide
From his evil eyes.
I'm so afraid now I'm starting to cry
He finds me weeping.
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.
He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.
He's already locked it
And I start to bawl, He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!", I scream.
But it's now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate. The hurt and the pain
Again and again.
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor.
My name is Lily.
I am three.
Tonight my daddy
Murdered me.

Copy & Paste this to your profile if it made you cry. (It didn't make me cry but that's cuse I had read it somewhere else before)

Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hotline. If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities press 3, 4, 5, 6. If you are paranoid, we know what you are and what you want so stay on the line and we'll trace your call. If you are delusional press 7 and your call will be sent to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer you. If you are dyslexic press 6, 9, 6, 9, 6, 9. If you have a nervous disorder fidget with the hatch key until the beep. After the beep, please wait for the beep. If you have short term memory loss, please try your call again later and if you have low self esteem, hang up; all our operators are too busy to talk to you.

Her name was Aurora
She was only five
This is what happened
When she was alive

Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic

Her only friend
Was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair

She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound

Until her parents
Unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endure

A bruise on her leg
And scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?

But she grabs her bear
And softly cries
She loves her parents
But they want her to die

She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
"God, why? Why is
My life always sinking?"

Such a bad life
For such a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did

Then one night
Her mom came home high
The poor child was hit and slapped
As hours went by

Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made

She thrust the blade
Right in her chest
"You deserve to die
You worthless pest!"

The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying

Police showed up
At the small little house
They quickly barged in
Everything was as quiet as a mouse

One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the sad little girl
Laying on the floor

It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms

I didn't write this, but if you hate child abuse, copy it into your profile and do anything you can to stop it, because this kind of thing happens everyday. It's wrong, and everyone should do their part to stop it!


are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

Boys are idiots

Copy this to your profile if you think I'M EXTREMELY RIGHT.

When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the crap out of them!

All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.

Education is important; school however, is another matter.

I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.

When life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!

Female Comebacks

Man: Have I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours and I go to mine.

Man: Hey baby, whats your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put u and i together. Woman: Really? I'd put f and u together.

Man: Your eyes, they're amazing. Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

Man: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Woman: About as much as when you got kicked out of Hell.

FRIENDS: Lend you their umbrella
BEST FRIENDS: Take yours and say 'RUN GIRL RUN!'

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS:Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS:Would be sitting next to you sayin "THAT WAS FRICKING AWSOME"

FRIENDS:Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your crap and tells you, "My's a tissue."

FRIENDS:Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS:Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS:Will confort you when the guy rejects you
BEST FRIENDS:Will go up to him and say 'its becuase your gay isn't it?'

FRIENDS: Meet your boy/girl friend and say nice to meet you
BESTFRIENDS: Meet your boy/girl friend and scare the BLEEP out of him/her by threatening to break every bone in him/her's body if he/she hurts your bestfriend

FRIENDS: Will say you can do better
BESTFRIENDS: Will call him and say"you have seven days to live"

FRIENDS: Ask why you're crying
BESTFRIENDS:Already have a shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry

FRIENDS: Will help you move
BESTFRIENDS: Will help you move a dead body

FRIENDS: helps you up when you fall
BESTFRIENDS: continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumbass?"

FRIENDS:Will be there to take your drink away when they think youve had enough
BESTFRIENDS:Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say,"Girl drink the rest of that you know we dont waste

FRIENDS: comfort you when you fight with your boyfriend
BEST FRIENDS: go over to his house and kick his ass

FRIENDS: tell you to forget it when you say you want to vandalize a guy's house
BEST FRIENDS: best friends are the ones getting fined by the police with you

FRIENDS: Think your insane for jumping off a roof onto a trampoline
BEST FRIENDS: Are jumping right after you

FRIENDS: come over every couple of months for a sleepover
BEST FRIENDS: are your weekend boarders

FRIENDS: are offended when you make fun of them
BEST FRIENDS: kick your ass and all's forgiven

FRIENDS: are shy around your boyfriend
BEST FRIENDS: will tease him till he blushes redder than a fire engine

FRIENDS: don't see you if you're sick

BEST FRIENDS: are why you're sitting in bed under a blanket with a thermometer, book, and your phone

FRIENDS:dare you to scream into the street
BEST FRIENDS: dare you to go streaking

FRIENDS: call you retarded for running through bleachers yelling "IT'S PICKLE TIME!"
BEST FRIENDS: are screaming and running with you

FRIENDS:would ignore this
BEST FRIENDS:Will repost this crap!

If you're a girl who's tired of people assuming that just because you're a girl you love pink and can't fight to save your life, put this into your profile. (this statement also thoroughly represents my sister)

If you are obsessed with fanfiction, put this in your profile.

If you have ever choked on air (or any other substance you thought imposible to choke on), copy this in your profile.

If you guys love to read, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think flamers are dirt bags who spend their day thinking of ways to insult people, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're a lunatic, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile.

Too many kids and teenagers have smoked or tried marijuana. If you haven't, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think the reason for taking Meth and other illegal drugs is the lack of an actual life, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of teenagers do drugs, have sex, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels.

If you don't know what your favorite animal is, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever copy and pasted something into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't have a MySpace and you don't want a MySpace, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of the internet population has a MySpace. If you're part of the 2 percent that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.

If your mentally insane, but no one knows, put this in your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you dont know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are wierd and proud of it, then copy and paste this to your profile!

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are crazy and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever tried to lick your elbow and knew that it was physically impossible, copy this to your profile.

Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!

90 percent of teens today would die if MySpace had a system failure and was completely destroyed...If you are one of the 10 percent that would be laughing, copy and paste this to your Profile.

If you are part of the .0000001 percent of people who don't have a MySpace, copy this onto your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

When life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!

If the world gives you lemons, you can make lemonade... or you can make a biologically engineered virulent air-born pathogenic virus that will wipe out the entire population of the planet, which would be a whole lot cooler.

If you frequently have conversations with yourself and/or fictional characters from your favorite books, copy and paste this into your profile.

GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! If you are really random put this on your profile.

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile (all of 'em!).

If you have weird friends, copy this into your profile.

If YOU are weird, please copy this into your profile.

If FanFiction.Net is to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

Stupid things! In bold are things i've done

1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out - I don't have a blender
2. Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails - Not yet...
3. Broken a chair by leaning back in it
4. Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking
5. Choked on your own spit while you were talking
6. Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not/or had had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head - I am blonde but smart... academically...
7. Been caught staring at your crush by your crush him/herself - ninja skills!
8. Have looked for something for at least 10 min then realized it was in your hand
9. Tried to push open a door that said pull
10. Tried to pull open a door that said push
11. Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love potion - no ones said that to me yet... I'm waiting...
12. Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else
13. Have tripped and fallen UP the stairs (if you don't know how that's possible, shame on you!)
14. Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave - have never PUT marshmallows in a microwave... hmm.
15. Have gotten gum stuck in your hair - ... I'm surprised I HAVEN'T done that!
16. Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble - close to it though
17. Have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it - I have hit someone trying to get it out of THE BOTTLE. not the item.
18. Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard - almost, it went in my nose but it didn't come out...
19. Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name
20. Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot - ...I've done it while swimming at camp... 10 times in the one swim...
21. Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on - I did this but I didn't forget about it, I just wore it out
22. Have fallen out of a moving vehicle. - I'm not that bad!
23. Have run into a closed door - ...but I have done that...
24. Have almost shot someone with a real gun while trying to shoot something else - this is not logical for me because NO ONE WOULD TRUST ME WITH A GUN!
25. Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it
26. It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke
27. Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer - I don't really blow dry my hair that much...
28. Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan - ...If I have I don't remember...
29. Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk
30. Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock
31. After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it
32. Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside - ...why?...
33. Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else
34. Ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property
35. Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc on purpose even though you knew it was hot - does it count if it was a hot pan just takin' out of the oven? well it said etc...
36. Picked out your change of clothes, took off the ones you had on and then accidentally put the old clothes back on - ...probably have just I don't remember it...
37. Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in
38. Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard - I have done this with other things but not milk or cereal. (ex: putting a plate in the bin...thank goodness it was empty...)
39. Walked into a pole
40. Wore two different earrings or shoes by accident
41. Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house - ..yea, not surprised...
42. Tried to take a picture of your/someone's eye with the flash on
43. Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small
44. Walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it - thank goodness I didn't leave the house...
45. Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there forgot what is was that you were going to do.
46. Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it - almost did once but I thankfully didn't
47. Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up
48. Have poked yourself in the eye
49. Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on
50. Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair - again with the blow drying...
51. Have done enough stupid things to make a list
52. Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil
53. Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it
54. Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was.
55. Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were - I did but I only said a age lower
56. Looked into an overhead light purposefully while it was on
57. Got up early and got ready for school/work/meeting, then realized that you didn't have school/work/meeting that day.
58. Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it - one told me to look out for it :/...
60. Have ever laughed at a joke that no one else thought was funny or a movie
61. Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa
62. Said funner, then had someone make fun of you for it - yep :P
63. Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence
64. Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person - don't really have inside jokes
65. Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side
66. Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions - ... I probably have at some point...
67. Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong
68. Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it
69. Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out
70. Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught
71. When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face - did that with swimming ones... but I think I did it on accident :P
72. Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb
73. Ran into a door jam
74. Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid
75. Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it
76. Have purposely licked playground sand
77. Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band
78. Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk when you weren't
79. Have been so hyper you actually scared people - I didn't SCARE anyone... the only way to do that would be to shut up for a long time...
80. Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would pull your hairs out
81. Put duct tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off
82. Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again
83. Sat and wondered why men’s dress shirts have a loop on the back. - men's shirts have a loop at the back?
84. Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about - only time code are mentioned is when we are being awesome :P
85. Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair
86. Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone - huh?
87. Shaved your tongue because you thought your taste buds looked weird
88. When at a restaurant/cafeteria, you used your spoon to fling stuff at people
89. Have flung forks at people in a restaurant/cafeteria
90. Sucked on a cup and got a hickey from it - does that work?

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Short by Selestyna Arpa364 reviews
Kotone comes to Ouran and meets a certain Host who is just her size! HunnyxOC Rated T for sailor's mouth, some vulgarity and other shenannigans.
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 122,212 - Reviews: 555 - Favs: 587 - Follows: 523 - Updated: 1/15 - Published: 8/10/2010 - Hunny/Honey/Mitsukuni H.
Four Seasons by yaoigirl22 reviews
Part 2 of The Days of A Flower: So, Severus survived the first year as a parent, the rest should be a walk in the park...right?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Family - Chapters: 22 - Words: 47,293 - Reviews: 781 - Favs: 939 - Follows: 1,119 - Updated: 10/4/2016 - Published: 4/26/2013 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
The Greyest Eyes by Sophie French reviews
It's one thing to discover you're gay at eighteen, another one to realise you have a crush on your long-term enemy, but you can tell things are definitely going to get complicated when you accidentally say his name as your girlfriend kisses you... HP/DM. Eighth year fic.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 90,948 - Reviews: 246 - Favs: 510 - Follows: 293 - Updated: 1/19/2014 - Published: 8/20/2013 - [Harry P., Draco M.] - Complete
Baking My Way Into Your Heart by theSilence reviews
AU No wolves. College fic. Derek is an uptight college student, all work and no play. His carefully scheduled life is thrown kilter when his regular barista is replaced with someone new. Sterek. Fluffiness. Slow-burn.
Teen Wolf - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 188,781 - Reviews: 1127 - Favs: 1,843 - Follows: 1,194 - Updated: 10/16/2013 - Published: 8/13/2012 - Stiles, Derek H. - Complete
White Lies by Cassis Luna reviews
(COMPLETE) Draco drinks a potion that makes him know if a person is lying, and Harry, apparently at fault that Draco is this way, is forced to 'help' him with the effects of the potion. For the first time, they deal with each other with no lies to hide behind. HPDM RWHG BZNL SSRL
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 31 - Words: 181,740 - Reviews: 1802 - Favs: 4,234 - Follows: 2,422 - Updated: 9/27/2013 - Published: 6/6/2010 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Please Don't Cry by nellenora the explorer reviews
"I'd do anything to stop them. Anything at all. I just want her to be happy." A collection of super short chapters in Dio's POV throughout the game, with the pairing of Dio/the blonde girl with no eyes. As far as I'm aware it's the first of it's kind, more information in the first AN :)
Mad Father - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 33 - Words: 7,641 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 3/14/2013 - Published: 2/11/2013 - Dio - Complete
Not Like Bond And Moneypenny by WhoNatural reviews
(AKA, the Ugly Betty AU where Stiles is totally Betty) Stiles thinks he's finally getting a break when a job at the sleek, sophisticated, Alpha Magazine opens up - but soon realises he's playing tutor-slash-babysitter to their new Editor-in-Chief. Derek's spoiled, grumpy, in way over his head...and so painfully attractive it makes Stiles want to lick his face.
Teen Wolf - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 31,808 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 142 - Follows: 14 - Published: 1/26/2013 - Stiles, Derek H. - Complete
Reasonable to Assume by Saucery reviews
Stiles and Derek raise a baby together. Or Stiles raises a baby; Derek just hangs around and panics.
Teen Wolf - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 35,276 - Reviews: 218 - Favs: 772 - Follows: 742 - Updated: 6/15/2012 - Published: 3/29/2012 - Stiles, Derek H.
Use Somebody by No1MournsTheWicked reviews
Draco Malfoy needs a job! When the position of P.A/secretary to hot shot solicitor Harry Potter, senior partner of the prestigious lawfirm 'Aurors', falls into his lap - How can he possibly say no to it. Slash, non magic, AU
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 112,033 - Reviews: 598 - Favs: 857 - Follows: 441 - Updated: 10/1/2010 - Published: 5/25/2009 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Potter to Potter by StormyFireDragon reviews
The sequel of For Love of a Slytherin. Harry and Draco arrived home from their honeymoon in Niagara Falls. They were happy and blissful, basking in the brightness that was in their hearts. The Dark Forces are on the move. With a new enemy, can the love they have survive? SLASH Draco and Harry. Don't like same sex pairings, don't read.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 97,343 - Reviews: 200 - Favs: 325 - Follows: 135 - Updated: 6/29/2010 - Published: 5/17/2010 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
For Love of a Slytherin by StormyFireDragon reviews
The battle in the Department of Mysteries is over. Harry receives his inheritance and things change rapidly for him. Love appears to him with the most unlikely of person. The forces of light must prove love conquers all. SLASH HP/DM
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 107,678 - Reviews: 308 - Favs: 836 - Follows: 295 - Updated: 5/16/2010 - Published: 4/5/2010 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Just a Little by TormentingAllLemmings reviews
An antisocial young woman is sent to Ouran for her last year of high school, and is found by Hunny. Her normal demeanor is broken down, and what ensues is completely beyond her control. MoriOC.
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 31,072 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 329 - Follows: 162 - Updated: 8/21/2009 - Published: 3/27/2007 - Mori/Takashi M. - Complete
Desperate Measures by vvc reviews
Harry may be a half-Veela, but there was no such thing as a destined mate. If somebody wanted him, they would have to prove their worthiness. And Draco’s chances don't look so good when Harry guts him at the welcoming feast… HPDM, mpreg
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 196,164 - Reviews: 2853 - Favs: 4,996 - Follows: 1,718 - Updated: 6/4/2008 - Published: 4/30/2008 - Harry P., Draco M.
Raspberry Jam by vvc reviews
Draco tries not to think of his upcoming transition and the unwanted partner chosen for him by his father. Then he finds he may have a choice after all. Will the faith he puts into his choice be rewarded? HPDM A slow, soft romance.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 80,655 - Reviews: 1152 - Favs: 5,087 - Follows: 941 - Updated: 10/3/2006 - Published: 9/20/2006 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Draco In Darkness by plumeria reviews
Following an accident in his seventh year, Draco loses his eyesight. After Harry elbows his way into Draco's dark world, both boys find themselves in a strange new friendship, and they each learn new ways to see each other … and themselves. [Complete]
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 40,959 - Reviews: 787 - Favs: 2,518 - Follows: 305 - Updated: 3/31/2003 - Published: 2/13/2003 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Only You and I reviews
This is a story about a man named Stan-... Sorry wrong story. This story is a Draco/OC and the OC is a snarky girl pureblood, you can guess what house she's going to be in. I don't want to give too much away so PLEASE READ AND REVEIW!,
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 1,777 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 5/25/2014 - Published: 11/1/2013 - [Draco M., OC] Harry P.