Author has written 1 story for Sherlock.
Hiya, I'm forgottenheroes.
I'm a major slash fan, and love crossovers!
I am a stickler for grammar and spelling and whatnot, so I find it hard to read stories with bad spelling and grammar. It's annoying, because loads of them have amazing plots, but I just can't get into them...
I'm English and proud!
I also like finding awesome quotes from various fanfics I read. I'll post them in this profile somewhere - please read some of them!
Wow. I just posted my first ever fanfic, and got an amazing response! I have had so many reviews and favourites!!! I love you guys! *sniff*
"I'm Ron Weasley," Ron finally managed to say after staring blankly at her for three whole minutes.
"Harry Potter," Harry told her.
"Are you really?" Hermione asked, curiously.
"What is it with people not having faith that I know my own name?" Harry asked Neville, who just shrugged.
Sirius comments, "Snivellus is like a slinky."
The werewolf gawks at Sirius, showing plainly that he has never heard anything more nonsensical.
He explains to Remus, "Slinkies aren't really good for anything, yet you still can't but smile when you see them tumble down the stairs."
Harry cracked a smile. "I think we can safely say that Dumbledore's a liar then," he said.
"Oh probably," Neville said. "Either that or he's jumped to conclusions so high that he needed a Levitation Charm to reach them."
"So Potter," Malfoy said. "The general consensus is that you've either gone mad or Dark. Care to fill us in on the right one?"
Harry raised his eyebrows. "If people really think I've gone Dark just because I quit the Quidditch team, then you're asking the wrong person if they're crazy, Malfoy," he said.
"Will I get to see your training bra?" Harry clapped his hands together in glee.
"Cupcake!" Hermione shrieked.
"What happens if they don't get trained?" Ron looked horrified.
Half an hour later, when Harry was giving the story its second run through of the night, Neville poked his head round the curtains. He saw Harry sitting cross-legged, with a book in his lap and a trio of enraptured baby Black Desert Cobras on his left knee.
"What's he doing?" Harry heard Ron ask.
"I think he's reading them fairy stories," Neville said dazedly.
There was a long pause. "Well," Seamus said after a while. "So much for Parselmouths being evil."
James pursed his lips together like an agitated grandmother watching her grandchildren paint with flamingly neon crayons on the fridge door.
"Both of you," he gritted out, "when I want your opinion, I will give it to you."
A twig snapped from within the trees. All three of their heads snapped up, staring in the direction of the sound. "What was that?" Gwen whispered.
"Probably nothing," Gwaine said, but he rested his hand on the hilt of his sword, "Just a squirrel."
"Is this like when there were pheasants," Merlin hissed, "But they were actually giant flying magical lizards who tried to eat us?"
"I think half the things that you do are stupid-" Hermione began heatedly.
"Only half?" Ron muttered, covering his head with a pillow to block out the sunlight.
"Maybe she just doesn't pay enough attention," Neville murmured back, copying Ron's method of refusing to admit it was morning.
"Harry," said Draco as Harry sat down beside him again next Potions class.
"Draco," he said and Draco smirked slightly.
"Potter?" Snape asked, features twisted slightly.
"Sir," said Harry.
"Professor Snape," Draco said, nodding a bit.
"Malfoy?" Snape asked, turning to him.
"Well at least you're all aquainted," Blaise said in a stage whisper as he passed by.
"That's it, the Devil will be ice skating to work from now on. Potter is acting all...mature," Snape deadpanned pausing in his step.
"Don't you dare say that filthy...that disgusting..." yelled Aunt Petunia as she held the broom in her hand.
"What, magic?" asked Harry. "How can I explain what type of magic I used, when you don't want me to use the word 'magic'? I would have to pull some magical solution out of my hat to explain magic without using the word 'magic'!"
Luna stood and said with a sparkle in her eye, "I'm glad you enjoy receiving marriage proposals Harry, if it will make you happy I'll have my father send one."
"No!" yelped Harry, "I mean that's not necessary, Luna."
She frowned slightly, then smiled. "All right Harry, but I'm sure he'll be disappointed. You'd make him a lovely wife."
"Sometimes I wake up at night, and I tell myself 'Fuck I'm so happy not to be a raisin'."
"That wasn't me," Sirius said quickly, "it was a ... ah ... a one handed man."
"You expect me to believe that a one handed man slapped me on the ass?" Amelia asked in disbelief.
"Bit more likely than a no handed man doing it," Sirius agreed, "why don't you go find him and leave us law abiding types alone?"
Thank you for reading them, I'll probably add more as I find them!
So I've been perusing various profiles, and I found some things that just HAD to be reposted here. So if you're interested read on!
(.• (.• Pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has SURVIVED, died, or is living with cancer.
They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled 'BANG', I don't think you'd kill too many people.
I don't suffer from insanity - I enjoy every minute of it.
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and wondered where the heck the ceiling was.
Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
Duct tape is like the force: it has a dark side, a light side, and holds the world together.
Guys: No shirt, no service. Girls: No shirt, no charge.
You laugh because I'm different; I laugh because you're all the same.
What starts with 'F' and ends in 'Uck?' A Firetruck!
When someone sweeps you off your feet, remember you're in the perfect position to be dropped on your ass.
Dear Math, I am not a therapist. Go solve your own damn problems!
Dear Math, I cannot find your x. She's not coming back. Don't ask me y. Just get over it.
I don't care what they say, the guy who milked the first cow and drank what came out was just a perv.
Remember: If someone insults you, it takes 42 muscles to frown, but only 2 to reach out and bitch-slap them.
Dear Students, I can tell when you're texting in class; no one stares down at their crotch and just smiles.
I love it how, in horror movies, the woman calls out "Hello?" Like the killer's gonna say "Yeah, I'm in the kitchen! Want a sandwich?"
…In Remembrance to Severus Snape….
….A Slytherin who died like a Gryffindor…
...without all the red and gold crap.
…In Remembrance to Fred Weasley…
…Who fought bravely to the very end….
…And whose jokes will forever brighten his other half…
…And will loyally await his soul mate and brother…
… with many jokes…
...he's got forever to think of them, right?
…In Remembrance to Dobby…
…Who was more free and full of love…
...than any elf, and most humans.
….In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin….
...the last real Marauder...
…who was not just a wonderful father…
….a incredible husband and brave hero…
...as well as a freakin' awesome werewolf.
….In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks…
…who died for ‘the greater good’…
...and would probably hex me for calling her Nymphadora.
…In Remembrance of Alastor ‘Mad-Eye’ Moody….
…who’s motto ‘constant vigilance’ kept him alive…
...and scared the crap out of some kids too.
…In Remembrance of Tom Marvelo Riddle a.k.a. Voldemort….
…who was pretty cool, and cute when he was younger…
…but who got his ass thoroughly kicked in the end
…In Remembrance of Albus Dumbledore…
…whose past and wisdom confused us…
…whose seeming betrayal shocked us…
…but actually who turned out to be an okay guy in the end...
...despite the whole 'almost killing Harry' thing.
In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange…
… because it’s was awesome how Molly slapped her with that Avada Kedavra!...
...she deserved everything she got and more.
…In Remembrance of Colin Creevey…
…who we really didn’t know too well…
…but took a lot of pictures and died fighting in a war…
…so he must’ve done something good…
…besides stalking Harry.
…In Remembrance of Hedwig…
...Harry actual first friend…
...who lived and died soaring.
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that would be how?...)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But it's 'just' a suggestion)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Well...duh, a bit late!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (I was hoping it was going to be frozen... darn.)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (And...I'm taking this because?...)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash!!...)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (Raise your hand if you've tried this.)
TEACHER: Glen, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
If you've read all the way to the bottom of this list then thank you, and I hope it made you laugh!