Author has written 6 stories for Fairy Tales, Yu-Gi-Oh, Inuyasha, Ouran High School Host Club, and Naruto.
IMPORTANT NOTICE: I WILL NOT BE UPDATING MY STORIES UNTIL AFTER EXAMS! This means at the very earliest, May.
CHECK OUT MY DEVIANTART... ART
A special thank you to those super special people who favourited my stories... Thank you!
D.O.B.: October 9, 2043... yes of course
Fav. Colour: Blue
Fav. Food: Spaghetti! and Corn on the cob w/ mustard. LOL
Least Fav. Food: Yam. (Eew... it disgusts me just thinking about it.)
Fav. Manga: Wallflower (Yamatonadeshiko Shichihenge). Also Ranma 1/2, Demon Diary, InuYasha, Rurouni Kenshin, Absolute Boyfriend, Ouran High School Host Club and anything in the first 40-ish Shonen Jump magazines, including Yu-Gi-Oh and Naruto.
"May you live in interesting times; May you come to the attention of those in authority; May you find what you are looking for."
"Wouldn't you like just once to see Charlie Brown hit that ball?"
"I'm so excited I could just roll over and be a taco!"
"Dear MATH, please grow up and solve your own problems. I'm tired of figuring them out for you."
"Everyone dies. We've known lots of people who have died. In fact, a good friend of ours died once. Of course, he got better, but that usually doesn't happen…"
"Do you have any sort of order in your life, or do you just stumble from one event to the next?"
"If Helen of Troy had the face that launched a thousand ships, and a picture is worth ten thousand words, doesn't that mean one picture of Helen's face should be worth ten million ships?"
"BOARD OF STUDIES: You have two cows. You want your students to be able to speak to the cows. Rather than teach the two cows English, you teach 50,000 students to moo. The students forget English. You are not concerned."
"I don't care if you play solitaire during the lecture; I don't care if you're on msn. You're all adults, most in 3rd year. You've gotten this far, you're doing fine." pause "I would prefer that you didn't view porn." student raises hand "You want to view porn in class?"
"Itachi is not allowed to knock up notdead!Kushina, because then Naruto's brother is Sasuke's nephew and that makes him Naruto's nephew and heeee's his ooooown uncllllllle. And Sasuke is especially not allowed to then knock up SnJ!Naruto, because then Naruto's son is his brother's cousin and heeeee's his oooooown auuuuunt. Which makes Naruto his own aunt and uncle and therefore his own spouse. Which goes a long way towards explaining the need for Kage Bunshin, really."
About Naruto: "You know, if we suspended his instant ramen from the ceiling with an elastic string, that would keep him amused forever."
Naruto: Can I sit there?
66: That’s right, and after being caught, imprisoned and executed, I come back from a pit of fire to take my revenge on you, maggot! Aha ahahahaha
"Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car."
"All television is educational. The question is, what is it teaching?"
"You never find Jesus in the bible looking at a guy who's so healthy, nice build and all that, 'Come over here. You have too much nice complexion and too healthy. Here, receive some leprosy.' 'Aaaah! Lord, why doest thou this to me?' 'Well my son, I work in mysterious ways.'"
"No, no, this is good - let's get some more people in my way. I think we're missing a few people. I don't think everyone's in my way yet - there's some guys there at the end of the block. Hey, guys, come on over here, we're throwing a party! In front of the door."
"...half the time the English lines don't even come close to matching the actor's mouth movements and you get a good couple of seconds of silence while the actor's mouth just keeps on moving... Hell, it's a tossup which is funnier - those, or the dubbed martial arts movies..."
“Jesus, Uchiha, just ‘cause your ass is up at eight in the morning doesn’t mean we all are!”
"You know, when most people skip work, they try to stay off national television."
"Hey, is my bagel burning?"
"Alcohol abuse is a real problem here, you guys have to promise me one thing. If you see some one drinking a beer but they put it down and its still half full, you pick it up and you drink it! There are sober people in Africa!"
"And the lord said, "Johnny, come forth and recieve eternal light." But Johnny came fifth, and won a toaster."
"I have great news!"
"I'm sorry for speaking while you were busy interrupting."
"I don’t know what you two idjits are using for brains but you should get your money back. It don’t work."
"I tried to train my clothes to wash themselves. I haven't succeeded."
"Dear Mr. Smith. We have received notice that you have died. Please know that you no longer have to pay your taxes. Should your condition change, you will not have to pay taxes for the period of death."
In the contract: "The employment will terminate at your death."
"You put us in a level 2 lockdown just so you could get laid? Are you crazy?"
"There's nothing like a funeral to make you feel alive."
"This is going to be the most important interview since God talked to Moses!"
"There is something backward about climbing up six flights of stairs in order to get to a dungeon."
"He isn't my lover, or my fiance, or my boyfriend or anything, and I refuse to be killed with him."
"Do you really exist?"
"We spent Saturday together. I really like him a lot."
"Guide to understanding a deviantART addict's day:
"God's not a pervert! My gosh, he created you, you don't have anything he hasn't seen before!"
"Shame your mother didn't drown you at birth."
"Okay... so I was being chased by a giant carnivorous banana!"
"FBI agents shopping for my underwear. That's not too creepy."
"I have run into enough walls to know that they can be deceptively cunning."
"Hey, there's this really neat trend going around. It's called knocking. You should try it sometime."
"I didn't sleep very well last night at work..."
"Hello, Operator? What's the number for 911?"
"Curiosity laughed in the cat's face before maiming it and throwing it into a lake to drown."
"...and when Marik and Malik aren’t pleased, a tsunami hits the United States of America and kills everyone. Even people in Alaska. The tsunami somehow dodges Canada."
"It's okay to believe yourself better than the rest of the planet, so long as you keep it to yourself."
"Can we get out of here? I'm learning again!"
"It was literally a sh!tty day. My patient sh@t on my shoes."
"Protein is for your brain! I can't think without a piece of chicken!"
"I told you it was a heart attack."
"I considered feeling rejected. But then I was overcome by joy at the thought that you would then be someone else’s problem."
"What, no hello, no how are you? I thought we were friends, Kaiba-boy. Don't tell me that kidnapping your little brother and seizing control of Kaiba Corp. has put a rift between us. It was nothing personal."
"I'll kill you til you die from it!"
"My land mass erupts with kittens."
"Do we want war?"
"So that nutjob devilman blew a hole in my shoulder, but I ain't letting that get me down! Check out what I did with an alteration spell! Behold! The amazing shoulder eyeball! -blink blink-"
"I'm sorry I got your boyfriend pregnant."
"When Thomas Aquinas visited Rome, he was shown the gorgeousness of the papal palace by the pope himself. Surveying all the artwork and precious metals used for decoration, the pope remarked to him, 'Well, Thomas, the church today cannot say, "Silver and gold have I none."'
"Grounded in my room. With my phone, and TV, and computer."
“How can a team of committed managers with individual I.Q.’s above 120 have a collective I.Q. of 63?”
"Books give you knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption leads to crime, crime doesn't pay. SO DON'T READ BOOKS!"
"Well let me tell you why, if I did marry bacon I would soon be jailed for frying up and devouring my yummy bacon spouse."
"Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but you're abusing the priviledge."
"Y'know, you've got pretty good posture for someone without a spine."
"Heaven won’t take me and hell is afraid I’ll take over. The Powers That Be don’t know how to classify me. Thus, I will never die, if only to save the deific bureaucrats from a mound of extra paperwork and red tape."
"¿Por que no te callas?"
"Once you can accept the universe as matter that is expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy."
“Where the hell’ve you been!” she shouted in his face.
"Say that again and I will have you crucified with your own pens."
"Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"
"You'll pay attention, won't you, Ahmose?" "Huh?"
"What's your buisness in Port Royal, 'Mr.Smith'?"
"This coming from the person who threatened to give birth to a muffin."
"When life gives you lemons, make apple pie! And then throw the lemons at cars."
"This story has a happy ending... The ship sank."
"I'm not just luggage; I'm a suitcase!"
"This day is today, right?" "You can't argue with that logic."
"Ever wonder why underwear are plural, but bra is singular?"
"Ever think of how much damage you could do in a china shop with a frozen turkey?"
"Do not mess with the affairs of the almighty dragons, for we humans are crunchy and good with ketchup."
"I intend to live forever, or die trying."
"...two fries short of a happy meal..."
"Shut up before I give you something to cry about!"
"We're both in barrels. That's the extent of my knowledge."
"It is a fact, well known to those who know it well..."
"Whenever god closes one door, he always opens another, even though sometimes it's Hell in the hallway."
"Vir prudens non contra ventum mingit."
"Hocine bibo aut in eum digitos insero?"
"Huc accedit zambonis!"
"Fabas indulcet fames"
"Come to the dark side. (We have cookies)."
"I don't SUFFER from insanity...I enjoy EVERY MINUTE of it!"
"There's a mugged leprechaun at the end of every rainbow."
'Down in Pompeii,
"Wow, that's sad... My dignity is worth five cans of pop..."
"Larry, I'm going to give you advice I give all the geniuses I know... Don't be an idiot."
"And here's another curse: may all your bacon BURN!"
"I stayed up until 1:00 playing cards with my grandparents. I have no life!" "I stayed up until 2:30 playing cards with myself. If you have no life, I must be a corpse! Exclamation point!"
"Is this a real gun?" " Uh no, it's not, but don't shoot!"
"They never do anything the simple way if they can find a complicated way around it."
"Be there any dangers, o ladder-legs?" "You're still in front of me, so I guess not."
"Think how much worse it would be if life was fair, and all the awful things that happened to us happened because we actually deserve them. I, for one, take great comfort in the completely impersonal hostility of the universe."
"I love music. I can't carry a tune in a bucket, but I think that's my throat, not my ears."
"It is better to be hated for what one is than to be loved for what one is not."
"Today is a gift... That's why it's called the present."
"Don't die, it's not good for your health."
"Live every day like it's your last. (Eventually you'll be right.)"
"One day I will be famous, and you'll be able to say I signed your yearbook." (written in yearbooks)
Me: "Can't you get new eyebrows before you wear your new head?"
Exclamation points and question marks to N.t.H... where did you find that website?
Hearts and exclamation points to J.E. who actually quoted one of MY sayings, in her 'birthday speech'...
Unsafe External Link