Author has written 11 stories for Twilight, Doctor Who, Harry Potter, Alex Rider, and Percy Jackson and the Olympians.
Can I just say, I can be a bit random sometimes, but you will learn it can be very good!!! Sometimes...
Ok, so now you know I am a complete randomist (I JUST MADE A NEW WORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), I can get on with telling you little random stories that I have written due to complete bordom etc.
Hmmmm... lets see, what can I put in this lovely box provided for me???
Well, I love ALL animals... except spiders (which I don't dislike, but am absolutly terrified of)
Ok, so I have added more stories, and I would like to make an important announcment.
A lot of my stories are already complete, so PLEASE stop pestering me to write another chapter. I mean, I love you guys too, but I can't write a story that I have already completed. I just don't have any more ideas. I promise I will write more stories, and I have a fabulous one in my mind, and a few unfinished ones too, but I tend to only post complete stories. Please take this into mind. Thank you.
AND I DO NOT WORK ON AN AIRPLANE, I JUST HAPPENED TO SOUND LIKE THAT WHEN I WAS WRITING IT!!!
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (But that's the only time I need to do my hair! *outraged noise*)
On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (Oh! The shoplifters special, then!)
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (Because that's soooo helpful.)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But , you know, its only a suggestion :P)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (YOU LOSE!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (NO. WAY. I would never have guessed)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But... wouldn't that save time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (Because children with head colds on heavy machinery or in a car is such a huge threat to society. Obviously.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (Aaaaannnnnndddddd why else would I be taking this?)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (Is there another dimension out there that everyone failed to tell me about?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (Well. Now I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (NO! Really?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Genius. Someone got paid huge bucks to write this.)
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (...)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (Because I was planning on doing that, you know.)
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and paste this onto your profile!
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