jashin.won't.listen
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Joined 04-20-13, id: 4676914, Profile Updated: 07-11-16
Author has written 4 stories for Naruto.

It's winter in Sweden right now. There is light all the time. Who needs sleep?


Random things I like:

Rainy days and sundays, everything's so calm then. The way that the sun doesn't set in the summertime but only appears to move back and forth a few feet, and the way it changes colour from yellow to blood red. And colours, I love them, I always dream in colour and my memory is coded by them and maybe that's a bit weird, but I don't care. :S

Music I like:

Anything from Black Sabbath to Lana Del Rey. W.A.S.P... Red hot chili peppers. Simon and Garfuncle. Aerosmith, Eurythmics, Bob Marley, just lot's of stuff. I've more or less always got music in my ears.

Movies I like:

Tarantino's stuff. Old movies, like Metropolis. Pulp Fiction.

Books I like:

Narnia, I've read them seven times or something. Too many. The hobbit?

Hobbies:

I like to read and write the stuff in general. Languages, culturestudies, science, philosophy, a little bit of politics. Calvin and Hobbes! I study too much. Or maybe not enough.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

New Year's Lust by PipBernadotte13 reviews
When Sir Integra decides to host a New Year's Eve party Seras is drawn to the crowd. Caught in way over her head and nearly succumbing to blood-lust, Alucard must keep watch over his blood child. But will a kiss shared between the two when the clock marks the new year bring about a different lust in the vampires?
Hellsing - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,510 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 92 - Updated: 9/1/2013 - Published: 12/31/2012 - Seras, Alucard
Noises by pinkomamori reviews
After the stressing war with the Fullbringers, Ichigo and Rukia were having a private time, or so they thought. Little did they know that some shinigamis accidentally heard their noises from across the wall. One-shot
Bleach - Rated: M - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,341 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/30/2013 - Ichigo K., Rukia K. - Complete
It's just a dream by Lord Farsight reviews
He just wanted to make a few pranks, he never realized it could go so out of hand. And the worst part is ... he actually liked it. NaruHina, Lemon, Oneshot
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,052 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 257 - Follows: 75 - Published: 4/30/2013 - Naruto U., Hinata H. - Complete
Monday Morning by Shycadet reviews
My week started off with a girl spilling coffee all over me. Such bad luck- until I realized how gorgeous she was. (Sakura pov/ Small flicks/ build up/ extreme rapid updates) -Complete-
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 35 - Words: 87,728 - Reviews: 311 - Favs: 151 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 4/24/2013 - Published: 4/8/2013 - Sakura H., Ino Y., Tenten, Kiba I. - Complete
House Calls by Spoiled Sweet reviews
Always the Team Mom, Sakura opens up her home as a clinic for the hospital-phobic ninja of Konoha. At the same time, her relationship with Kakashi begins to evolve in a way she never expected. M for swearing and later content.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 40 - Words: 262,803 - Reviews: 3124 - Favs: 4,157 - Follows: 2,054 - Updated: 4/21/2013 - Published: 8/2/2010 - Sakura H., Kakashi H. - Complete
Taboo Vs Us by Princess of poison reviews
The best part about taboos is the fun ya have when ya break em'. Two horny twin brothers, one smexy Charger and a whole lotta lovin'. A Rukia/Ichigo/Hichigo threesome with mainly smutty goodness.
Bleach - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,114 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 20 - Published: 4/9/2013 - Rukia K., Ichigo K. - Complete
Impunity by ichilover3 reviews
Her breathing was erratic and her face red, but still she looked him in the eye. "Why are you telling me this?" "Because," he said slowly, "you are the Queen." Ichi/HichiRuki
Bleach - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,780 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 233 - Follows: 40 - Published: 4/5/2013 - [Ichigo K., Rukia K., Dark Ichigo] - Complete
Am I His? by Ocean Eve reviews
Anko is from a small crime family. Her father instead of paying the number one Crime Lord Orochimaru, he gave Anko as payment. How will she react? What will she do? Better summery inside! AnkoxOro-sama RATED M!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Crime - Chapters: 25 - Words: 104,908 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 3/13/2013 - Published: 11/13/2011 - Anko M., Orochimaru
Sakura, Peach and Pineapple by Arden Tenjou reviews
Byakuya discovers that Rukia has an unusual preference. He decides to indulge her, and ends up learning something about himself. Formerly an extra from Sakura no Eda. Renji x Byakuya x Rukia.
Bleach - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,534 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 10 - Published: 1/22/2013 - Byakuya K., Rukia K. - Complete
Hush Little Baby by Areyon reviews
Yachiru and Kenpachi pairing. Future lemons. Not so great summary. Reviews please, it will determine end of the story if no one likes it.
Bleach - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 12 - Words: 14,420 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 1/16/2013 - Published: 5/16/2010 - Yachiru K., K. Zaraki
Red by scarlet letters in the snow reviews
What is black and white and red all over? Shikamaru's mind when Ino breaks in, but they are both in for a little surprize. R&R Rated:M! Use caution before reading if you do not like adult themes and extreme romance details.XxOneshotxX? Lemonlimesour.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,003 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/3/2013 - Shikamaru N., Ino Y. - Complete
Return to Konoha by DragonSorceress22 reviews
The continuation of "More than Enemies," "One Week Later," "Loose Ends," "Otogakure," and "The Breaking Point." Tsunade is in need of some closure but that's not what she'll find when she returns to Konoha one last time. Rated T for some violence/torture and mild swearing.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 11,991 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 12/22/2012 - Published: 11/6/2012 - [Orochimaru, Tsunade S.] Kakashi H. - Complete
A Hollow Ichigo Seduction Dedication To Ru by Theresa Crane reviews
A Hollow Ichi Collection. Ch.1-A Dark Love-This will focus on Hollow Ichigo and Rukia, & of course Ichigo as well. This is to help my Hollow Ichi Obsessed Friend Have her own little place to drool over the man of her dreams. Chapter 2 is very IchiRuki!
Bleach - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 19,520 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 9/23/2012 - Published: 9/24/2010 - Dark Ichigo, Rukia K.
Sloth by XxGoddess AthenaxX reviews
Ino's changed. All he wanted was Ino - not the submissive girl before him. After their breakup will Shikamaru do something to get Ino back or will it be too late? Part of the Seven Deadly Sins Series. ShikaIno. Oneshot. Lemon. Mentions of drug abuse.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,818 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 12 - Published: 9/15/2012 - Shikamaru N., Ino Y. - Complete
Whispering by RockerLover reviews
Whispering sweet nothings to no one. What will you do when you want more? What will you risk to get it? What if the past won't leave you alone?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 61,068 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 100 - Updated: 7/30/2012 - Published: 4/22/2011 - Sakura H., Kakashi H.
Favors by unkeptsecret reviews
Once upon a time, they fought with bullets. This war is sweeter and much more dangerous.
Black Lagoon - Rated: M - English - Crime/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 27,102 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 4/29/2012 - Published: 7/11/2011 - Balalaika, Chang - Complete
Fifteen by oncemorewithfeeling15x reviews
Maeby is attracted to one of her Uncles... find out what happens when her crush finds out. WARNING: SMUT, Incest, light BDSM
Arrested Development - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,035 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 4 - Published: 4/18/2012 - Complete
Just Tell Me No by RockerLover reviews
Peace is restored but it comes at a great price. Rather than move on, Sakura flounders in self pity. But what happens when her teammates find out? What will they do and how will she feel about it?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 31,709 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 3/25/2012 - Published: 8/10/2011 - Sakura H., Kakashi H.
Love Drunk by Vain Ambitions reviews
Matsumoto made Hitsugaya drunk, and when Hitsugaya's drunk... Oh you don't want to know what he will do... HitsuXMatsu Mature fic beware!
Bleach - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,772 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 5 - Published: 1/11/2012 - [R. Matsumoto, T. Hitsugaya] - Complete
Morning Glory by NinjaSheik reviews
With vengeance on her mind, Anko struggles in a search to hunt down the man who ruined her life, Orochimaru. A new feeling starts to bloom within her as she is now thrust in a dangerous tempest of the darkest desire and passions of the heart.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 117,072 - Reviews: 119 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 12/25/2011 - Published: 6/1/2011 - [Orochimaru, Anko M.] - Complete
Dango Kiss! by Jigoku-Dayu93 reviews
Orochimaru takes Anko to the Tanabata festival, with some naughty surprises in store for his favourite student. Sequel to Orochimaru-Sensei's Tongue. OroAnko, graphic lemon
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,692 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 13 - Published: 8/6/2011 - Orochimaru, Anko M. - Complete
Two Fools Dancing on the Hands of Time by DirectionOfTime reviews
A number of unexpected but obscurely intertwined events causes Kakashi to open his eyes to exactly what Sakura has become: a woman and a sexual being - no longer a little girl. Will they be able to resolve their awkward sexual tension? Lemon content...
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 20,816 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 160 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 8/3/2011 - Published: 8/1/2011 - Kakashi H., Sakura H. - Complete
Limbo by Ukiyo-e reviews
Ino's got a lot on her plate these days, a new job with the ANBU Interrogation Squad, new friends, and a certain senbon-sucking jounin she can't seem to get out of her head. Genma/Ino, Raidou/Yuugao, Ibiki/Shizune, Aoba/Anko. Adult Content Warning.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 59,515 - Reviews: 188 - Favs: 161 - Follows: 243 - Updated: 6/26/2011 - Published: 7/18/2006 - Ino Y., Genma S.
Stripped Bare by J-Pop Princess reviews
When Sakura wanted a change of pace, she hadn't expected THIS! Now she's on a mission with Kakashi, masquerading as a dancer at a club far away from home and she finds herself forced to explore her own powers of sexuality and seduction. KakaSaku LEMON
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 26 - Words: 295,128 - Reviews: 3613 - Favs: 3,799 - Follows: 2,078 - Updated: 6/11/2011 - Published: 1/7/2008 - Sakura H., Kakashi H. - Complete
S&M:Jealous Bits by Princess of poison reviews
Ichigo and Rukia are figthing again but this time its about what both of them feel but neither is willing to admit to themselves, let alone each other.Throw in Renji, a jealous strawberry and an angry midget and Ichi Ruki madness ensues.
Bleach - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,825 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 8 - Published: 5/19/2011 - Rukia K., Ichigo K.
A Change of Pace by twiinklestar reviews
Shikamaru is always trying to accomplish his tasks quickly and efficiently. He doesn't like to drag things out or waste time. However, when it comes to sex, he's completely the opposite. ShikaxIno PWP
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,858 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 5 - Published: 3/31/2011 - Shikamaru N., Ino Y. - Complete
In Love with the King of Perverts by Slytherin84ever reviews
Sakura reflects on how she ended up in love with him. After all, he was the King of the Perverts, and a lot older than her. But, love doesn't take account of these things. Fluff, Lemon.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 470 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 8 - Published: 10/9/2010 - Sakura H., Jiraiya
Taboo Love by NinjaSheik reviews
Hiding her feelings for her beloved sensei, a young Anko goes to tell Orochimaru how she feels. But, will she end up regretting her confession of love, and suffer the pain of heartbreak for her taboo love?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,623 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/30/2010 - [Orochimaru, Anko M.] - Complete
Friends with Benefits by jm1681 reviews
Rock and Revy's friendship takes an interesting turn as one, simple indiscretion leads to another... Revy/Rock, M for sexual situations and language. Please Review.
Black Lagoon - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 32 - Words: 64,378 - Reviews: 211 - Favs: 691 - Follows: 198 - Updated: 4/11/2010 - Published: 2/23/2010 - Revy, Rock - Complete
Players by Kukaburraxxii reviews
Ino joins the league of players Genma/Ino
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 149,692 - Reviews: 293 - Favs: 204 - Follows: 184 - Updated: 2/23/2010 - Published: 5/28/2008 - Genma S., Ino Y.
Tender Loving Care by SilverShine reviews
KakaSaku. One-shot. For a man who claimed to hate hospitals so much, Kakashi sure did spend a lot of time in them. And Sakura was finally beginning to understand just why...
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,730 - Reviews: 160 - Favs: 1,121 - Follows: 134 - Published: 11/19/2009 - Sakura H., Kakashi H. - Complete
Once More, With Feeling by Cynchick reviews
Sakura didn't know what she was thinking when she showed up on his doorstep. SaiSaku.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,924 - Reviews: 204 - Favs: 1,038 - Follows: 100 - Published: 1/8/2009 - Sai, Sakura H. - Complete
Dirty Deeds by Serenanna reviews
It should have been a sweet deal of a mission, lots of money for very little work. But, after being stuck with the same man for four years, being 'just friends' should have been a dirty phrase. KakashixSakura, GemnaxIno, Lemon eventually.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 251,986 - Reviews: 875 - Favs: 1,069 - Follows: 927 - Updated: 9/14/2008 - Published: 5/13/2007 - Kakashi H., Sakura H.
I should have known I missed you by aboutright reviews
Gaara about a love far away... I like to see it as Neji, but then, you could say anyone. IT's sad, I know, But it's my own. And who knows? Perhaps Gaara is taking things for granted? Story might follow to this... Depends on the response I get.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Poetry/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 148 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/2/2008 - Gaara, Neji H. - Complete
Tragedy by Kukaburraxxii reviews
He’d never leave her like Saki had, he’d never betray her like Sasuke had, Kakashi was a steady rock that resisted the tide of life. Angsty kakasaku with sasunaru and sasusaku
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 15,214 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 5/19/2008 - Published: 5/14/2008 - Sakura H., Kakashi H. - Complete
How Not to Annul a Marriage by LadyLefaye reviews
With the help of Lucille's vodka, George Michael and Maeby make their marriage legally binding. George Michael x Maeby with hints of Lindsay x Michael. Rated M just to be safe.
Arrested Development - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,070 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 11 - Published: 2/27/2008 - Complete
The Window by SilverShine reviews
Kakasaku Sakura always wanted to see Kakashi unmasked. This was a bit much though...
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 165,171 - Reviews: 5407 - Favs: 5,432 - Follows: 1,749 - Updated: 1/2/2008 - Published: 9/20/2006 - Kakashi H., Sakura H. - Complete
Gossip by J-Pop Princess reviews
Kakashi and Ino have never paid much attention to each other, but all that changes when the rumors start to fly. Ordinarily, he would ignore this kind of thing, but she's just so good at making his life a living hell!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 65,344 - Reviews: 157 - Favs: 251 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 7/23/2007 - Published: 5/26/2007 - Ino Y., Kakashi H. - Complete
Duty Before Honor by SilverShine reviews
[KakaSaku] Sakura knew why Tsunade didn’t want a virgin on this mission. Things might get out of hand. Acts might be carried out too far. She was glad Kakashi was accompanying her, but right then she wouldn’t have minded the entire population of Konoha.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 19 - Words: 157,457 - Reviews: 3884 - Favs: 5,763 - Follows: 1,409 - Updated: 1/6/2007 - Published: 5/4/2006 - Kakashi H., Sakura H. - Complete
Reason by run.dog.run reviews
So sometimes his hands shake.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,957 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/18/2006 - Genma S., Kakashi H. - Complete
Territorial Claim by Hanzatsu-Hime reviews
Nami belongs to Zoro. He knows that. She knows that...right? She doesn't seem to act like it, when she keeps getting off at every island to stay out all night and drink the night away...Zoro was a pirate hunter long ago, but now, he was hunting for one in particular. LEMON! ZoroxNami
One Piece - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 11,927 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 183 - Follows: 34 - Published: 10/1/2006 - Zoro, Nami - Complete
Don't Hesitate by Ukiyo-e reviews
[ONESHOT] Sometimes Kunoichi's are asked to make certain sacrifices. If you have to lose your innocence, you need a good teacher. Odd pairing
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,338 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 91 - Follows: 13 - Published: 6/27/2006 - Ino Y., Genma S. - Complete
Horseshoes and Hand Grenades by LadyLefaye reviews
What should have really happened when they tried to use the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. Told from the perspective of a historian. Pure silliness.
Monty Python - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 241 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 9 - Published: 5/27/2006 - Complete
Another Wolf by dragonsnap reviews
And now the wolf is at my door, and things are never going to be like before. KakaSaku. Important Notice in Chapter 4
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 14,539 - Reviews: 306 - Favs: 548 - Follows: 130 - Updated: 6/19/2004 - Published: 1/19/2004 - Kakashi H., Sakura H. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Sweet dreams reviews
Sakura starts having naughty dreams about Kakashi. Well, who knows how it goes from there... kink/smut.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 608 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 8 - Published: 11/25/2013 - Sakura H., Kakashi H.
Bonding reviews
A poor excuse for a story, more like a smutathon. But kinky, and it keeps on getting worse. But the smut is still good.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 11 - Words: 29,635 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 84 - Follows: 139 - Updated: 7/4/2013 - Published: 4/27/2013 - Sakura H., Kakashi H.
Not just another mission reviews
Having been a two-man team for a long time, Sakura and Kakashi live, eat, sleep, train and do most things together. And after having done countless missions together, what is another one? Well clearly, it isn't just another mission after all. The idea came to me after having watched one too many Tarantino-movie... Currently undergoing a slight rewrite.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 5 - Words: 14,421 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 80 - Updated: 6/14/2013 - Published: 5/17/2013 - Sakura H., Kakashi H.
The Jester reviews
Currently undergoing a good facelift. Be patient.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 4/25/2013 - Published: 4/20/2013 - Sakura H., Kakashi H.