This bio is old. And I'm too lazy to update it, so just deal, okay?
Here's a long list of quotes for you. I hope you find them funny and insightful, because I can't put any other [expletive deleted due to FF.net's censorship] up here without baffling you incredibly.
"I know a lot of people who can't drive." - Dad
"I'm getting some bad, bad images of Mason... But when I say 'bad', I mean it in a good way." - Me
"Mr. Brodie is the Warlord of Stupidity." - Me about my computer lab teacher
"How are they supposed to survive the Apocalypse?" - Me to Scott (my boyfriend) while watching Dogma
"When I say 'screw you', I really mean 'I love you'." - My friend, Chris
"Be vengeful. Have fun. Kick ass." - My own personal motto.
"Your name is Candy, right?" - Me
"Rule #1: If it doesn't fit, get a bigger hammer." - Dad. He was fixing the zipper on my jacket for me. I'm just glad he didn't say it around the kids in my school.
"I have the insane urge to run through the halls of our high school, singing 'Yellow Submarine' at the top of my lungs." - Me
"Yes, I'm a racist." - My English teacher
"Kiss the cook, but don't grab the ass." - I can't remember where I read this
"I'm not trying to kill you on purpose. I'm trying to kill you by accident."