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Joined 07-18-13, id: 4896286, Profile Updated: 09-30-15
Author has written 3 stories for Web Shows.


Unfortunately, I will no longer be active on this account. (I forgot the password. Didn't want to guess the password or recover it. Was super lazy and just made another account with a different email) Ahem. Anyway, I really feel like IAmWhatIEat was a different time period in my life and I feel that I've really grown as a writer and as a person.

-I will keep this account active so that you can still read my old works. If you haven't read Love is Blind please do so and leave a review!

-If you would like, I'm still posting new stories. I'm just doing so as TheMetaBard so if you would like to catch up on my current works, please head on over and immerse yourself in angst filled DanxOC drama.

-I'm terribly sorry as I do have unfinished fics on this account! In the future I'll revisit them and maybe finish them up for those who are (maybe) still on the edge of their seats (even after two years??). In the meantime I'm trying to power through my current stuff.

Thanks for stopping by!

Hi lovely angel-faced placenta cookies of mystery!

Seriously, there's cactuses (cacti?) here.

If the plural form of cactus is cacti, wouldn't that make the plural for penises peni?

Anyways, a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away I wrote fanfiction. However, it was like Panic! At The Disco/Fall Out Boy OC-angst fiction when I was 12 on Quizilla. Stifle your laughter. I went through those rebellious teenage years and I put writing down. Then I picked it up again when I found my Holy Land (Tumblr) and my be-all-end-alls (My Fandoms)

Discontinue use and consult your doctor if you experience any burning, itching, flaking of the skin, jaundice, hallucinations, delusions, mood swings, emotional attachment of characters, and death.

Music: Attack! Attack; Avenged Sevenfold; Bring Me the Horizon; Kill Paradise; Breathe Carolina; Pierce the Veil; Sleeping with Sirens; Blood for Blood; Mae; Relient K; All Time Low; We Came as Romans; SECRETS; Chunk! No, Captain Chunk!; Falling in Reverse; Woe, Is Me; Of Mice & Men

TV/web Shows: The Walking Dead; The Tudors; Rome; The Sopranos; Supernatural; Doctor Who; MLP; Breaking Bad; AmazingPhil; MaxMoeFoe; Danisnotonfire; JennaMarbles; DailyGrace; ItsKingsleyBitch; JacksGap; Zoella; youdeserveadrink

Books ALL TIME FAVORITES: The Fault in Our Stars; Catch-22; The Divine Comedy; The Catcher in the Rye; Nineteen Minutes; A Song of Ice and Fire; Carrie; Piercing the Darkness; The Circle Series; Much Ado About Nothing

Fandoms and Bandoms I associate myself with: Supernatural; AmazingPhil; Danisnotonfire; Of Mice & Men; All Time Low; The Walking Dead; Dragonball Z

OTPs: Auslan Cashby; Destiel; Jalex


I've decided that Author's Notes go where I see fit and if you're that one person that likes to send me 12 reviews on a story, I will most likely acknowledge your existence with some answers. :) So, get to reviewin'

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A Song For Skyrim by Jack Trader reviews
I thought I was destined to be no one in particular. And I was happy about that. Then I went off to Skyrim to join the Bard's College and ended up nearly killed, proclaimed Dragonborn, and told I was supposed to save the world, bring about world peace, and feed the children. And I have this really annoying companion I'm hopelessly in love with. And no, I am NOT okay with this.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 46 - Words: 298,658 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 137 - Follows: 123 - Updated: 7/6/2015 - Published: 10/14/2014 - Dragonborn/Dovahkiin, Serana, OC - Complete
When You Wish Upon a Star: A Phanfiction Parody by realityisnoplacetolive reviews
*Complete!* Fifteen-year-old Melanie Ruso didn't mean any harm; she just wanted Dan and Phil to be happy. That's why she wrote them eighty-three phanfics. But what happens when, through some magical circumstances, she accidentally forces her idols to live out her fantasies? Strap yourselves in folks, this is going to be one wild ride! (Rated T for language)
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 35 - Words: 46,507 - Reviews: 1038 - Favs: 301 - Follows: 164 - Updated: 10/20/2013 - Published: 4/3/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire, ItsWayPastMyBedTime - Complete
paint fic by iissolame reviews
danisnotonfire and amazingphil , or , is it danisnotinsane and psychotic phil?
Web Shows - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,640 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 5/16/2013 - Published: 4/23/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire - Complete
Peppermint Phil by unbreakable pixie reviews
It's the first day of winter and Christmas is almost here! Phil's feeling down, spending Christmas alone for the first time! Or does he? He meets Lily, an ordinary girl, with a lonely Phil and an ordinary girl who knows what will happen! AmazingPhil x OC
Web Shows - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,276 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 1/8/2013 - Published: 12/21/2012 - AmazingPhil - Complete
Our Only Chance, a Danisnotonfire fanfiction by TropicalFishcake reviews
Many people know Danisnotonfire, but do they know the real Dan Howell? There's one girl who does, and she's determined to hold onto him. Him? Not so much. But who knows? She may be his only chance of happiness. (My first fanfic, please R&R!)
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 129 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/15/2012
Destiel Oneshots by obsessionisawonderfulthing reviews
Sad Destiel ficlets.
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 98 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 15 - Published: 10/15/2012 - Dean W., Castiel
Everything's Gonna Be Fine by TheTallBlondeOne reviews
AmazingPhil and Danisnotonfire story...
Web Shows - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,570 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 25 - Published: 12/13/2011 - Complete
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Searching For The Heart (An AmazingPhil Fiction) reviews
Breathing is natural. Inhale. Exhale. But what happens when something so extraordinary happens that it sends you to new places, to new faces and takes your breath away? (Sequel to Love is Blind)
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,815 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 9/30/2015 - Published: 8/12/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire, Crabstickz
East of Eden (An AmazingPhil Horror-Fiction) reviews
AmazingPhil has always loved his fans. Always. When a fan goes too far with her obsession with the charming YouTuber, he will have to face life or death to save his best friend, Danisnotonfire and figure out that it's not all fun and games in the land of Eden.
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Horror/Friendship - Chapters: 10 - Words: 9,836 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 8/17/2013 - Published: 7/29/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire
Love is Blind (A Danisnotonfire Fanfiction) reviews
Hi. My name is Lia. I decided to move to England in search of following my dreams in music, and instead I get hit in the face with this really awkward guy's iPhone and he ends up falling in love with me. And I think I might be in love with him. Maybe. And I think his best friend hates me. Sorta. Oh, did I mention I'm blind?
Web Shows - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 24 - Words: 32,927 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 8/13/2013 - Published: 7/18/2013 - AmazingPhil, Danisnotonfire, Kickthepj, Crabstickz - Complete