lilsteves
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Joined 11-21-03, id: 490760, Profile Updated: 02-10-10
Author has written 1 story for Fairy Tales.

I'm now co-authoring a Harry Potter story! Check outMy Angel of Darkness 's profile to read Blind and Beaten! Starting in the 7th chapter, it's half me!

16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"

This made me laugh hysterically! ...Good times. Gooood times.

If you have ever fallen up a flight of stairs, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, (actually I have) Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki (I do all the time!), WeaselChick, Celyna ( i fall up the steps to school every time i go up them... sadly...), SSAHC, Sanoon, Phantom-Flames, Leopardheart (just once, but still...), Littlwhisker (I do it all the time so get over it!), Sakeraa (I blame it on my new sandals), Katklaws (multiple times, actually), Sparrowflight, Sapphirepaw (It was fun so i did it again, and again, and again...), hxcb (i really have no reason for doing it. it just kinda happened...over and over and over), SilverwingedShadow (I was tired and was trying to prove a point to my friend by stomping off...and as you read it didn't go so well..), Meepisms ( my stairs has it in for me... ), FerretMan (ouch), death-on-arrival (it really hurt, wow!), Lord Rekhyt (And I have scars to prove it), lilsteves (lost half of a reeeaaally good sandwich that way)

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Christmas Stockings by Cheryl Dyson reviews
During a party at Auror HQ, Harry stumbles across Draco Malfoy wearing a questionable holiday outfit. OMG H/D AND MATURE ADULT CONTENT! IT MUST BE THE HOLIDAYS! XD
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,600 - Reviews: 185 - Favs: 819 - Follows: 63 - Published: 1/3/2011 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Amelioration by Cheryl Dyson reviews
Harry and Draco return to school for their 8th year, and things are so much different without Harry's imminent threat of being destroyed. What can they possibly do to lighten things up?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,710 - Reviews: 161 - Favs: 555 - Follows: 58 - Published: 1/17/2010 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Adopt A Slytherin Day by Destiny's-Perfection reviews
Draco should have stayed in bed. He really really should have. Warning: Mild Slash/Yaoi. HP/DM.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,455 - Reviews: 191 - Favs: 501 - Follows: 166 - Published: 1/11/2010 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
The Abysmal Dating Life of Harry Potter by Celebony reviews
Dating's tough when you're Harry Potter. Ron watches his best friend go through some very bad dating experiences, while going through some awkward ones of his own. H/R slash. Please note the rating and warnings inside.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 24,994 - Reviews: 397 - Favs: 916 - Follows: 197 - Updated: 1/9/2010 - Published: 11/18/2009 - Ron W., Harry P. - Complete
Colors by xErised reviews
Tomorrow is the day when Draco will be released from Azkaban. Harry Potter has been desperately waiting. Complete. HP/DM
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,259 - Reviews: 240 - Favs: 683 - Follows: 59 - Published: 11/13/2009 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Kisses by ArwendeImladris reviews
Spock stole Vulcan kisses from his captain. Jim was just unbelievably oblivious for the longest time...K/S Slash.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,642 - Reviews: 105 - Favs: 1,016 - Follows: 97 - Published: 10/11/2009 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
The Impossible Dream and The Unreachable Star by star54kar reviews
Harry wants the impossible, and Ron is unable to give it to him. Warnings: angst, and unrequited feelings.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 331 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 7 - Published: 8/17/2009 - Harry P., Ron W. - Complete
A Tiny Little FullBlown Obsession by dirty-darella reviews
One peak of Malfoy in the Quidditch showers and Harry becomes a tad enamored. Hermione is no help at all. Warnings for Adult Content! M/M sex
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 14,415 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 538 - Follows: 49 - Published: 7/25/2009 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Five and One: I Wanna Hold Your Hand by Penbrydd reviews
-Kirk/Spock- Spock's flirting is totally unintelligible to Kirk, but it's enough to make the Ambassador's entourage retch. -ONESHOT-
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 960 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 829 - Follows: 56 - Published: 7/23/2009 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
He loves you, you know by Kaoru2.50 reviews
When Ron said those five little words, Harry developed a bit of an obsession with denial. HPDM. One-shot
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,215 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 11 - Published: 7/14/2009 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Obvious by remuslives23 reviews
How Lily Luna Potter won the pot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,259 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 9 - Published: 6/4/2009 - Scorpius M., James S. P. - Complete
Why Sirius Should Not Be Allowed Near A Computer by remuslives23 reviews
Remus learns the hard way why Sirius Black should never be allowed near a computer. Drabble for duck or rabbit as a thank you. Very mild M.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 753 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/17/2009 - Remus L., Sirius B. - Complete
Understanding by Mistress Slytherin reviews
Harry shows Voldemort the power he does not know, and in return Voldemort gives him something irreplacable.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,441 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 17 - Published: 4/23/2009 - Harry P., Voldemort - Complete
A Lack of Color by beakanoma reviews
Part 1 Complete. In his fourth year, Harry falls for fellow Hogwarts student and Triwizard champion, Cedric Diggory. Part 1 in The Love So Green Collection - SLASH, Harry/Cedric. M for some slight sexual content.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 30 - Words: 130,609 - Reviews: 1350 - Favs: 2,060 - Follows: 821 - Updated: 1/19/2009 - Published: 3/24/2006 - Harry P., Cedric D. - Complete
Lovely You by His Spectacles reviews
Harry's feeling harassed. SLASH HPDM
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,362 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 180 - Follows: 17 - Published: 11/21/2008 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
20 ways to make my Professor blush by yaoi-fied reviews
[COMPLETE] Harry decides he likes how Snape looks when he blushes and is determined to make it happen again. SLASH. HPSS. Tittle says it all. R&R [This a sexual story between teacher and student. If you can't handle it, don't read.]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 21,072 - Reviews: 744 - Favs: 520 - Follows: 168 - Updated: 3/16/2007 - Published: 2/11/2007 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Bliss by Sirry-Addict reviews
Sirius and Harry share their first kiss, denying a future that could, quite possibly, happen. [SiriusHarry slash oneshot]
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,470 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 9 - Published: 2/9/2007 - Harry P., Sirius B. - Complete
Checkmate by Naadi reviews
HxD slash. Draco has a plan to get Harry Potter, and challenges him to a game of Dare Chess. But is it love, or betrayal, he has in mind? A real game of chess is played throughout the story. A seventh year story based on canon through Goblet of Fire.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 19 - Words: 259,337 - Reviews: 2301 - Favs: 3,149 - Follows: 562 - Updated: 5/1/2006 - Published: 5/26/2002 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Serpent's Darkness by Sierra Armunn reviews
The new student's secrets are to be revealed... and the end of the world is at hand... but in the favor of the Light or the Dark? R&R
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 12,367 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 4/1/2006 - Published: 3/24/2005 - Harry P. - Complete
private pleasure by charlymalfoy reviews
draco wants to marry harry but harry just wants a lover.i dont own harry and co they belong to jk rawlings
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 23,005 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 165 - Follows: 16 - Published: 1/28/2006 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
And Then There Was Harry by Menecarkawan reviews
COMPLETE Severus Snape is given the responsibility of caring for Harry Potter. What happens when he stops seeing 'Potter' and starts seeing 'Harry? Will be SLASH.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 32 - Words: 127,472 - Reviews: 741 - Favs: 1,003 - Follows: 244 - Updated: 10/31/2005 - Published: 9/18/2005 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Chicken Soup for the Slasher's Soul by Tine reviews
Christmas sweaters, novels, and mistletoe. Major snoggage ensues. A little something to brighten the holidays. HD SLASH.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,694 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/15/2003 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
The Next Ten Minutes by Goddess Blue reviews
HD slashy one-shot. 'The whole great hall was somber, as if someone had died. Or passed gas.'
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,720 - Reviews: 244 - Favs: 772 - Follows: 72 - Published: 8/14/2003 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
The Almost Escape reviews
What if the Prince somehow prevented Cinderella from leaving at twelve that night, revealing her true self? Based off of Disney's 'Cinderella'.
Fairy Tales - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,110 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/25/2006 - Complete
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