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Joined 12-30-03, id: 511839, Profile Updated: 08-03-21
Author has written 10 stories for Harry Potter, Buffy: The Vampire Slayer, Avengers, Angel, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., and Stargate: SG-1.

A quick biography. I'm Jack. I've done a lot of things in my life (husband, father, son, soldier, author, chef, game designer), and now I'm retired. I wasn't always. I’m old enough to remember watching Neil Armstrong take his famous one small step, and have very clear memories of Nixon resigning. I have raised five kids on my own and I wish it were otherwise... I miss her greatly, as do my sons and daughters... but you don't always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you just might find you get what you need.

And if you don't get that reference, you're younger than I am by a fair bit.

Since writing the original version of this profile, I've become a grandfather twice over. And I have to say that I am very, very proud to have such wonderful grandsons.


About Opinions and the Right to Think as One Wants: As I see it, the biggest problem with the idea that everyone is entitled to hold their own opinion is that some people think that this makes all opinions equally valid. Nothing could be the furthest from the truth. Some opinions, I’m sorry to say, are nothing but big steaming piles of horse-shit, and they will always be big steaming piles of horse-shit. Some opinions are wrong, and your right to believe in an incorrect opinion doesn’t change the fact that the opinion you hold is utter horse-shit. I point to the Flat Earthers, the people who believe in Creationism, and Republicans as three prominent examples.

In addition to the fact that having a right to your own opinions not guaranteeing your opinion is right, having the right to hold your own opinion in no way protects you from being ridiculed for holding that opinion. “I can think what I want” is no shield against someone saying “Yeah, but what you think is horse-shit!” to you. This is because part of that “everyone has a right to their own opinion” thing is the right of other people to make fun of you because that opinion you are so strenuously holding onto is utter horse-shit.


A Quick Note to British Fan Fiction Writers: When you're writing American characters, please learn how American's speak. By which I mean the terms we use. Learn how American's speak and thus you won't be writing British characters in an American setting when you're meant to be writing Americans in an American setting. I've noticed, among British fanfic writers of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Castle and West Wing there is a tendency to have them talk about watching Baseball matches in their flat, and go on holiday where they will wear their swimming costumes. Americans don't do that. We watch Baseball games in our apartments and go on vacation where we will wear our swim suits. We ride to upper floors in elevators, not lifts. When the lights go out, we use the flashlight, not the torch. We eat French fries with our burgers, not chips. We keep the spare tire of our car in the trunk, not the boot.

It really isn't that big a deal. Usually American readers can figure out what you mean. But when you put these words into the mouths of American characters, your dialog feels flat and false.


Hodgeson’s Law: Just repeat to yourself, “It’s just a show. I should really relax.”

Bellisario’s Maxim: You shouldn’t analyze this stuff too closely.

These are two statements I try to live by when it comes to fan fiction. Basically, what they mean is that this stuff is supposed to be entertainment… a way to have fun for a little while. Harry Potter isn’t supposed to be some philosophical discussion about how to live a life. Nor is it meant to be a moral allegory, or a guide to spiritual whatever. It’s just a story. So when you find yourself taking it all a bit too seriously, repeat Hodgeson’s Law and Bellisario’s Maxim to yourself until you calm down and realize that they’re just stories.


The First Law of Fan Fiction: Every change which strengthens the protagonist requires a corresponding worsening of his challenges. Or, to put it plainly, you cannot make Harry Potter a Jedi without giving Lord Voldemort the Death Star. Read any book on writing and it will tell you that stories are all about conflict. A hero who is so strong that his conflicts are no longer problems is no longer in a story worth reading. The most fatal temptation of fan fiction is to think of how much easier your character's life would be if he was super-powered. We are naturally inclined to think of ways to solve our characters' problems for them. But first we much think of ways to make their lives more difficult.


On Buffy Summers Being a "Hero:" To put it bluntly, and there are going to be a lot of people screaming for my blood after this, Buffy Summers stopped being the "hero" of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and started merely being the "protagonist" of the show the moment she decided to feed Faith Lehane to Angel at the end of Season Three. Buffy's reason for doing so, which wasn't to save lives or prevent Faith from hatching some evil scheme, but was rather "I want my boyfriend back", caused Buffy to completely lose all of the moral high ground she had been granted in response to all the evil Faith had done. Faith had done evil, yes, but nothing that made "render her helpless and feed her to a vampire" a reciprocal punishment, especially when the cause was to betray a human being in favor of a monster who was constantly one good fuck away from return to being a rampaging beast who had previously murdered one of Buffy's friends, had tortured Buffy's mentor, and who came close to destroying the entire world.

If Buffy's intent had been merely to put a stop to Faith's evil, she could have done it any time prior to Angel's poisoning. But no, she waits until she needs Slayer blood to cure her boyfriend, and goes, "Well, I know where to get some of that!" and goes Faith-hunting.

"Protagonist" is not synonymous with "hero."

Buffy is a complex and well-envisioned character. Sarah Michelle Gellar did a great job bringing her to life, and Joss Whedon was a genius for creating a character that deep and interesting. In the history of television, Buffy Summers was a landmark when it came to the empowerment of rounded, strong female characters. That said, I have to admit that if I met her in real life, I'd probably hate the arrogant, self-centered, heartless bitch. She isn't a "hero," she's a protagonist. You want a heroic character in Buffy the Vampire Slayer? Okay, here's one: Dawn Summers, a fantastic example of a Byronic Hero. Much more heroic than her older sister. Here's another: Xander Harris, a hero in the Campbellian mold. I'll give you a third: Faith Lehane! Yeah, you read that right. Faith Lehane, the murderer seeking redemption is a classic example of a Grecian-style Tragic Hero, the one who is undone by their flaws only to redeem herself and triumph in the end. And as such, she is infinitely more heroic than Buffy Summers.


Things I Cannot Stand To See in Harry Potter Fan Fiction

In no particular order (I added them to this list as I thought of them), these are the things that will make me stop reading a story. They drive me up the wall in irritation. Please note that these aren't the only things that will make me stop reading a story... these are just the ones I've written down. I reserve the right to expand this list as I choose, when I choose.

Oh, and if I've left an unfavorable review for one of your stories, I don't want to hear how you're not really bad because you haven't broken any of these rules. You can be a piss-poor writer and not break any of these rules...

1. H-PINO Stories. H-PINO stands for “Harry Potter in Name Only”. I’m all for a good AU story, but when the author has to begin their story with a full-page summary of all the differences between their version of the Harry Potter universe and the canon version, then they might as well be writing a completely original story with completely original characters.

2. WhineyLittleBitch!Harry. A little angst now and again is fine. Sorrow and despair, especially in the wake of a tragedy, is reasonable for your characters. But multiple chapters of pointless moping and whining make me want to vomit. And hit someone.

3. Author Interjections. Save the author’s notes for the beginning of the chapter, or even better the end of the chapter. Do not interrupt your narrative to make some unnecessary (A/N: This really sucks, doesn’t it? Throws you off because you were reading one thing and suddenly you’re reading another? It’s distracting, right?) comment because it sucks and it is a sign of a very bad writer. In general, readers are smart enough to get your references on their own; you don’t need to tell them every little thing, especially when you interrupt your stories to do it.

3a. Actually using the word “Flashback” to indicate a Flashback. Why not just insert the words "I'm a Fucking Horrible Writer" into your text and get it over with, because there are much better ways to indicate a flashback than actually saying “flashback”. Use those better ways.

4. Bad Translations. I appreciate that some fan fiction writers are not native English speakers. That isn’t really a problem. What is a problem is when a person who’s English isn’t that strong tries to translate their story into English themselves. I’m sorry, but all this does is turn what is likely your truly wonderful story into a hard to read mess. My advice: if you aren’t sure about your English, find a native-English speaker who is fluent enough in your language to translate it for you. And don’t forget to give your translator credit for helping you; it’s the least you can do after all.

5. Slash. Now, when I say “slash”, I mean those stories that place characters that are strictly heterosexual in canon into homosexual relationships. This has nothing to do with homosexuality and everything to do with turning characters into something they are not. When you write slash, you are performing an action commonly known as an “asspull” (as in, “you are pulling it out of your…”). And no, you yaboons, there isn’t any “subtext” there, and I am not missing it. You’re just making shit up.

5a. That counts double for Crack!Slash. By which I mean pairing Harry up with Draco Malfoy, Lucius Malfoy, or any other male character for whom Harry’s first emotional reaction is violence and hatred.

5b. Harry/Voldemort especially. Do I really need to explain this one?

6. Ridiculous Non-Slash Pairings. Draco Malfoy is an arrogant elitist racist bastard. The last people he's going to hook up with are the daughters of a family he thinks of as poverty-stricken blood traitors, or a Mudblood who hangs around with his arch-enemy, Harry Potter.

6a. Especially Draco/Ginny: They are not compatible. They are not romantic figures. They absolutely not the reincarnation of Romeo and Juliet.

7. Vendetta Fics. A vendetta fic is a story in which the writer decides to “punish” a character he or she doesn’t like by portraying the disliked character in the worse possible light imaginable. I’m sorry, but how fucking childish is this? Specifically:

7a. Idiot!Ron/Rapist!Ron/Thug!Ron. I hate it when Ron is portrayed as a bumbling idiot whose best features are his lack of table manners and his obsession with Quidditch. In canon, Ron’s a flawed individual, sure, but that doesn’t make him evil. In point of fact, there are no perfect, shining individuals (the closest you can find is Luna Lovegood, and she's not perfect, either) in any of the Harry Potter books, so punishing Ron for not being perfect is just plain dumb.

7b. Ginny Weasley Depicted as Nothing More Than an Obsessed Fangirl. Oh please. Could you get more off-base than this? Yes, she starts out with a crush. That crush is pretty much over by Goblet of Fire, so let it go already.

7c. Harry/Ginny Being “Oedipal” and Thus “Gross”. The idea here being that supposedly, Lily Potter and Ginny Weasley look alike because they are both redheads. This is one of the most retarded things I’ve ever heard. That’s like saying actresses Frances Fisher and Alyson Hannigan look alike because they are both redheads. (Hint: they look nothing alike; Google search the names and see for yourself.)

7d. Harry's friends turn their back on Harry because... um... because... hold on... I'll think of some stupid reason in a moment. This is another cliche. Usually, its the two youngest Weasleys who turn on Harry because of some really retarded reason that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever and turns Ron and Ginny into complete OCs, because regardless of how much you dislike these two characters, even you haters would have to admit that their portrayal in these stories is out there like friggin' Pluto...

7di. ... While we're on the subject of betrayal, the idea that Molly Weasley playing the Question Game with a 10-year-old Ginny is part of a conspiracy is utter bullshit. You know how it goes, Harry starts wondering, "How could Molly have forgotten where the platform was?" and suddenly it turns out that the Weasleys are a bunch of backstabbers, so obviously Harry is better off with Hermione. Or something. Guys, all this bullshit does is shine a light on how little you know about actual parenting. Real life parents play this particular game all the fucking time. You ask your child a question to which you already know the answer, not to remind yourself of the answer, but to make sure the child knows the answer. I once had a nice half-hour session with my then-seven year old in which I pretended to forget which denomination of dollar bill was the highest, the 1, the 5, the 10, or the 20, because the point was to make sure the seven-year-old knew which was which. Thus, Molly asking Ginny what the platform number was is evidence of nothing more than Molly being a good parent. So get over it, you paranoid idiots.

7e. Ginny only having three settings: bitch, whore, and bitchy whore. Can we get more childish than this?

7f. Molly Weasley only having two settings: shrieking harridan and violently shrieking harridan. She's not as bad as the Weasley haters portray her as. Really.

7g. Harry-sent-to-Azkaban stories where his closest friends turn their back on him for no real reason whatsoever. It's almost like Hufflepuffs are the only ones capable of loyalty.

7h. SlytherinsAreTheKoolz!Fics, where casual cruelty and manipulation is a good thing, and everyone but the Slytherin are idiots, especially the Gryffindors, who aren't smart enough to even say "What just happened" when they're outsmarted. I mean, really... I know you suffered through high school and are now taking your outcast status out on the cool kids of the Harry Potter universe, but this sort of nonsense is just stupid...

7i. Harry's interest in Ginny first appears about the same time as love potions, ergo, Ginny used a love potion to ensnare Harry away from (insert other female here) . And usually, the "other female" is Hermione, who's probably being dosed with love potions by Ron. Guys, this has to be the most addle-brained, paranoid, delusional bullshit I've read, and in that I am comparing it to most Conservative political screeds I've read. There's no canon evidence of it. None whatsoever. And no, you idiotic moron, I'm not missing the "subtext". Rowling is amazingly anvilicious with her subtext; she's not subtle at all. If this is what was really going on, she'd have been explicit about it. So get over yourself and stop acting like a loon.

7i(1). ... with Molly Weasley's assistance, of course. More bullshit on a galactic scale.

8. Anachronisms. An anachronism is a mistake in the history of the story, and they are very distracting. For example, if you want to write a story in which Harry is still at Hogwarts, unless he’s become a teacher, your story is going to take place some time between the summer of 1991 and the summer of 1998. Keep this in mind every time you include something from the Muggle world. For example, I read a story in which Harry and Ginny danced to a Rascal Flatts song at Bill and Fleur’s wedding. The problem is, the song they danced to came out in 2007, fully ten years after Bill and Fleur got married. And learn what sort of technology is available in the 1970s. Lily Evans would not own an iPod. She died before they were invented, remember?

8a. Getting people's ages wrong, especially when it comes to Generation 3. Teddy Lupin could not be at Hogwarts at the same time as James S. Potter. Teddy is seven years older than James Sirius (in the Epilogue, TL is 19 and has been out of school for two years; JS is 12 and is just starting his second year). Scorpius Malfoy is in Albus Potter's year... which means he'd be a third year when Lily Potter got there; he wouldn't be in the same classes as she is in. Likewise, neither of the Scamander boys (Luna's children) would be in the same year as Lily Potter, as Rowling has stated that Luna didn't marry and have kids until the Potters already had their three...)

9. Moronic Inter-Personal Conflict. Too many so-called romantic stories supposedly build “tension” by introducing a misunderstanding that could easily be cleared up if the two people involved would just open their mouths and talk to one another. But no… the plot requires that these two otherwise intelligent people act like complete idiots by deciding they should “suffer in silence”. I blame this type of story on twenty years of boring, formulaic so-called “romantic comedy” films. They all have the same story: boy and girl meet-cute, boy and girl fall in love, boy and girl break up because of something stupid, boy and girl finally get back together just as the film ends after clearing up the problem and realizing they should be together. I hate that. I hate it in films, and I hate it in fan fiction.

10. Fred and George Reduced To Being Nothing But Comic Relief. Yes, Fred and George are troublemakers and inveterate pranksters. They are also brave and courageous young men, one of whom in canon gave his life for the cause. As characters, they are more than just clowns put into place to make Harry laugh. If all you have them do is be personality-less pranking machines, you’re wasting them.

10a. Twinspeak. While we’re on the subject of the Weasley Twins, I hate hate hate hate hate it when a writer has them speak in broken sentences, where one twin says the first three words of a sentence and the other twin finishes. Not only is that fucking irritating to read, its not even accurate. Go back and re-read the books and you’ll see that the twins don’t talk like that! What they do is follow each other’s sentences with the next applicable sentence. Got that? They speak in complete sentences!

10b. Gred and Forge. Still on the subject of the Weasley Twins, they call themselves Gred and Forge exactly once in seven books. It’s not a running joke; it’s a singular occurrence. So cut it out.

11. Mary Sue Stories. I just can’t take these stories seriously.

12. Americans at Hogwarts. American Characters in General, in Fact. I read a fantastic story once in which Harry and Ron have both become Aurors, and they are sent to the United States to pick up a Death Eater the American version of Aurors had arrested and were holding for extradition. Those American characters were fine, as they made sense. But an American coming to Hogwarts makes no sense at all, in my opinion.

13. Sexy!Snape and Debonair!Draco. In Severus Snape and Draco Malfoy, Rowling put together a couple of really compelling antagonists. They seem like real people. Unfortunately, its gone past some Harry Potter fans that these two characters are really unpleasant individuals. They are nasty. They are bulles. They are antagonistic and mean. Malfoy is self-centered and arrogant, and Snape is arguably a sociopath in the clinical sense. For some reason, though, there exist dozens upon dozens of stories in which Snape and Draco are dark, brooding sex-objects who attract women to them like flies because of their smoldering sensuality. Are you fucking kidding me, here? You know, I blame the films for this shit. I met Alan Rickman a few years before he began playing Snape; he was a truly nice guy, an amazing actor, and was incredibly charismatic. He was also smart, funny, and told great stories. The man simply could not help but project that charisma into Snape, who is supposed to be as uncharismatic as they come. I’ve not met Tom Felton, but a couple of friends who have tell me that he, too, is funny, charismatic, and down-to-earth. So I honestly think that these writers have formed their Sexy!Snape and Debonair!Draco opinions based on the actors, not the books.

14. Super!Harry. You’ve seen these stories. Harry the master of wandless magic. Harry the master of elemental magic. Harry the recipient of direct training by the four founders, turning him into the most powerful wizard since Merlin. Harry as the reincarnation of Merlin! You get the idea. This is silly. If you want to make Harry as powerful as Voldemort, cool… I think that’s a fine idea, what with the prophecy implying that Harry is Voldemort’s “equal”. But don’t go nuts, okay?

14a. CraneTechnique!Harry. Almost as bad as SuperPowered!Harry stories are stories in which Harry is secretly taught a single new spell… that one spell in all the world, usually some form of “Old Magic”, that no one has ever heard about and that “none can defense”, as Mister Miyagi put it. (I hate to break it to you, guys, but I’ve been a karate student since I was 15… my seven year old could have blocked that crane kick…)

14b. Animagus!Harry. Too many stories feature this idiocy, and all of them ignore the fact that becoming an animagus is supposed to be really super-rare and super-difficult. It is, in fact, hinted that not everyone can accomplish it. The idiocy really cranks up when Harry has more than one animal form. But even worse than having more than one form is…

14c. Phoenix!Animagus!Harry. This is just stupid.

15. Super!Hermione. Almost as common as Super!Harry stories are Super!Hermione stories. Usually in these stories, Hermione is a super-intelligent, all knowing beautiful Princess who is always right, always knows the answer to every problem, get’s any guy she wants with little to no effort, and is always the one who gets the boys out of trouble. Most especially:

15a. Grangerverse Stories. Speaking of arrogant, delusional cretins who somehow think they have some sort of say in how the Harry Potter stories should have gone, let me give special mention to those Grangerverse morons. According to these acephalic cretins, Hermione Granger and not Harry Potter is the central figure in canon, despite the fact that Harry’s name is all over the covers of the books. Harry, it seems, is merely a “frontkick” (defined as “a character who appears to be the protagonist but is actually the sidekick”) of Hermione Granger. These deluded individuals claim that since the Harry Potter books “occupy a larger space than the author intended”, Rowling really has no say in how the stories go. In addition, because Rowling “refuses to recognize the truth about Hermione”, she (Rowling, that is) is “delusional and crazy”. In my opinion, the Grangerverse people need to seek immediate psychiatric assistance, because it is they, and not Rowling, who are nuts.

15b. Makeover!Hermione: Hermione Granger is fine the way she is. If anything, she needs to be less bitchy and superficial, not more.

16. Ass-Hat!Slytherin!Harry. I really enjoy well-written “Harry Gets Sorted to Slytherin House” stories. It’s an interesting “what might have been”. But when Slytherin!Harry turns into just as big a Pureblood supremacist asshole as Draco Malfoy, simply because he’s sorted into Slytherin, it makes my teeth ache and I get the urge to punch the writer in the nose.

17. Casanova!Harry. Harry Potter is not some romantic, sensitive guy who effortlessly woos women, getting them to fall in love with him in mere hours. The truth is, he’s pretty much fucking clueless when it comes to girls and isn’t mushy or romantic at all. He has a bad temper and he’s moody. He’s not intuitive or sensitive, and his relationship with any girl (even Ginny, the woman he ends up with) is likely to be a bumpy ride at first.

18. CobraCommander!Voldemort. Lord Voldemort is supposed to be the absolutely darkest, dangerous, and most evil wizard every to have lived in the Harry Potter universe. Making him a moustache-twirling incompetent is just wrong.

19. Harry Potter, Expert on the Wizarding World. I can’t stand this one. He leaves the Dursleys and immediately knows just what to do to make him fat, rich, and happy amongst the wizards, despite only having learned that he was a wizard himself about a femtosecond ago.

20. Tortured Briticisms. I understand why American writers include British slang in their stories; it gives the stories verisimilitude. That is, it makes them seem more real, given that the characters and locations in Harry Potter are British. But there’s a time and place for slang. Yes, “snogging” is a slang term used in Britain for kissing, as “shagging” is for having sex. But know when to use these terms and when not to. Snogging is what two teenagers do when their hormones overheat while they’re sitting on a couch in the common room. Kissing is what two lovers do while on a bed, gazing deeply into the eyes of their one true love, seeking the connection with their beloved’s soul, the passion seeping from their very pores as the admiration they feel for each other emanates from them like ripples on a pond in the morning. Get my point? Sometimes, the actual word needs to be used.

20a. Blatant Americanisms. Of course, American writers who don’t even make the effort to sound a little bit British tick me off too. And I’m not just talking about writers who use “Mom” in place of the British “Mum”. I’m talking about continually using American references in place of their British counterparts (like calling them elevators instead of lifts, or calling the ground floor the first floor, and so on).

21. CruelMachiavellian!Dumbledore. Sorry, but no. While it is true that the man was manipulative in canon, and while it is also true that the man was too smart for his own good as he sat at the center of his own personal spider-web, Dumbledore wasn’t harsh, wasn’t uncaring, and was absolutely not some criminal mastermind. Cut it out, already. I especially despite stories in which Dumbledore is just as evil as Voldemort, but is more subtle about it.

22. Un-Scotlandy Scotland. Before you start describing what it’s like to live in Scotland, please learn what the country is like. We’re talking about a rainy, chilly, foggy, windy, hilly (and sometimes mountainous) country. Make no mistake, it is a beautiful land, and I’m very glad to have had the honor of living there for six years, but Scotland is not the coast of the Carolinas, and does not share that climate.

23. Ginny Behind Glass Stories. These are the stories where Ginny’s brothers (especially Ron and Percy, but almost never the Twins) threaten to murder Harry if he actually comes within sniffing distance of Ginny, despite the fact that Ginny makes it perfectly clear that she wants to be with Harry and isn’t going to put up with their shit.

24. Songfics. Look, I’m glad you were inspired by the song to write your story. I do the same thing; I once wrote three whole chapters based solely on the emotions I felt when I listened to Jeff Buckley’s cover of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah", Elton John’s "Someone Saved My Life Tonight", and Chicago’s "Hard To Say I’m Sorry" back-to-back. But I didn’t feel the need to inject the actual lyrics of those tunes into the chapters in question, because doing that is stupid.

25. Luna, the Font of All Wisdom. I can’t stand stories in which Luna Lovegood is portrayed as some sort of mystic-earth mother figure who is in tune with some extra-whatsis source of worldly wisdom rather than simply being eccentric. Just because she’s smart and a little loopy does not turn her into the Oracle of Delphi. Similarly:

25a. Luna Never Talking About Anything Other Than Nargles and Snorkacks. This is a waste of the character.

26. Hufflepuffs As Incompetent Boobs. I cannot stand stories in which all Hufflepuffs are portrayed as nothing but a load of uncreative nabobs incapable of actually achieving. If Cedric Diggory being chosen as Hogwarts Champion during the Triwizard Tournament isn’t a big enough clue that this idea is complete bullshit, how about the fact that Ernie MacMillan, proud Hufflepuff that he is, was the first Hogwarts student to demand the chance to throw-down against Voldemort and his Death Eaters in the last book?

27. Draco Malfoy, Prince of Slytherin. Sure, Draco Malfoy usually has a small handful of hangers-on around him at any given time, but Slytherin House is larger than just Malfoy and his followers. There is no evidence in canon that Malfoy “rules” his House in any way, shape, or form. This is especially true when he’s an ickle-firstie! The sixth and seventh year Slytherins already in place when Malfoy gets there would control the House a lot more effectively than a loudmouth prig like Malfoy. And given that his dad was in the crapper with Voldemort during his seventh year, I doubt even the “seniors rule the school” effect would have made him “prince of Slytherin”, assuming Draco made it that far.

28. Harmonian Stories Described By the Writer as Fixing Things. The arrogant implication in this is that canon is somehow “broken” because Harry ended up with Ginny, and that the writer of the Harry/Hermione story is “fixing” things or “correcting” things by writing their story. Look, if you want to write a Harry/Hermione story, go for it. But don’t pretend that the Harry/Hermione ship is the correct relationship, because it isn’t. The books are over. Rowling sank your ship before it ever left the dock. Get the fuck over it already. On related notes:

28a. Harry and Hermione Cheating on Ron and Ginny With Each Other. Marital infidelity, to me, is one of the worst kinds of unforgivable betrayal possible between one person and another. The fact that writers of such stories general portray Harry and Hermione’s affair as a good thing just sickens me.

29. Magical Oaths Made on One’s “Life and Magic” Having the Same Effect as an Unbreakable Vow. Where the hell did these things come from, anyway? The canonical Unbreakable Vow is a special ceremony; its this big important thing because it will kill you if you break it. If all it took was waving one’s wand and saying “I swear…” there’d be no need of such a ceremony… not to mention no need for Veratiserum.

30. Draco Malfoy “Seeing the Light” and Becoming a Nice Guy. No, sorry… even if Draco did realize he was on the wrong side and jump ship, he’d still not be a nice guy. He’d be arrogant, nasty, bigoted, and mean, even if he was fighting against Voldemort.

31. M-Preg Stories. Not only because the basic idea is stupid, but because the basic idea is really, really stupid.

32. Romantic Eleven Year Olds. Because we all know how many eleven year olds engage in torrid, Harlequin Romance-style romances.

33. Sex Scenes That Are Obviously Written By Thirteen Year Old Virgins. Look, this is going to sound harsh, but if you’ve never done it (and by God, if you’re only thirteen you’d better not have done it yet), don’t write about it, because you don’t get it right. Trust me.

34. Harry, Not Harold or Harrison. His name is just “Harry”. Similarly, the names are Lily, Percy, and Draco, not Lillian, Percival, and Draconis.

35. Hermione’s Parents Being Named “Daniel” and “Emma”. In the words of a much wiser man than I, naming Hermione’s parents after actors Daniel Radcliffe and Emma Watson is hair-pullingly awful, so cut it out. And believe me, naming them "Emmett" and "Danielle" or some other gender-switched version of "Dan and Emma" is just as horrific.

36. Itemized Shopping Lists. I don’t need to know every little thing Harry buys on his trip to Diagon Alley. And by the way:

36a. Magical Luggage. You know what, that trunk that Barty Crouch, Jr. stuffed Mad-Eye Moody into was pretty cool, but there’s no reason for Harry to have one. And the stupidity only increases when the trunk doubles as an studio apartment.

37. Excessively Detailed Physical Descriptions. I once read a story where the writer took three long paragraphs to describe how an OC looked. We got details on her body type, her hair color, her eye color, what sort of makeup she was wearing, how she had her hair done, what she was wearing, her facial expression, and even the scent of her perfume and how she held her wand. And all it did was make me want to hit the back-button as quickly as possible.

38. Casual Female-On-Male Violence. You’ve seen it before. Harry makes a joke that irritates Ginny. In response Ginny punches Harry in the shoulder hard enough to make him wince. Everyone around them laughs. Ron says something insensitive. Hermione hits him in the head with the book she’s reading hard enough for him to get a lump. Everyone around them laughs. Why are the other characters laughing? Why are such situations considered humorous? Would the writer think Harry hauling back and punching Ginny in the shoulder hard enough for her to bruise because he was irritated by something she said funny? Would it still be considered “comedy” if Ron slammed a heavy book onto Hermione’s skull because she said something he considered rude? Double standards suck ass, folks, especially when they are used to turn domestic violence into comedy. Do not let them into the door.

39. Bizarre Names For Female Characters. Now, I know you’re thinking, “But Jack, you’re talking about a book series where female characters are named Ginevra, Hermione, Narcissa, Bellatrix, and Andromeda!” Yes, but most of the female characters in the books are named basic, normal names. The Black family is a special case in which all the children are named after constellations, so unless your character is a Black, there’s no call to name her “Summerwind” or “Rayven” or somesuch bullshit (and since “Summerwind” and “Rayven” aren’t constellations, don’t name your female Blacks that either). The most common female baby names of 1980 (the year Harry and most of his classmates were born) in Great Britain were (in order) Susan, Emily, Jessica, Hannah, Daphne, Chloe, Mary, Ruth, and Cheryl.

40. Harry’s Quidditch-Toned Muscles. Could someone please explain to me how sitting around on a broom while looking around until he sees a small glimmer of gold, then riding the broom as fast as he fucking can to catch a little winged gold ball small enough to fit into the palm of his hands would make him ripped and muscular? Willing a broom to go where you want it to has nothing to do with bench-pressing weights or running laps. You basically sit there and let the broom make all the effort.

41. House Elves Who Speak Like They Were Retarded. Go back and re-read Dobby’s dialog from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets guys. In fact, see the movie, since Dobby’s dialog (while not whole) was accurately presented. Dobby speaks in whole sentences. Sure, he refers to everyone by proper noun instead of using pronouns, but he doesn’t mispronounce any word but “Weasley” and he doesn’t speak like he was five years old. Neither, for that matter, do Kreacher or Winky.

42. Naming the Sorting Hat… Especially If You Name It “Floppy”. I don’t care how cute you think it is. It’s not cute, its fucking stupid.

43. JoePantoliano!Peter. Too many writers forget that, once upon a time, Peter Pettigrew was a good friend to James, Lily, Sirius, and Remus. If he hadn’t been as trusted as he was, his betrayal wouldn’t have been so painful. He’s not going to be so obviously untrustworthy as to remove all doubt of his loyalty to the Potters.

44. Harry Getting Vernon Dursley Fired. The first sentence of the second paragraph of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone mentions that Vernon is the Director of Grunnings. In the UK, the Director is a corporation’s chief executive. This means Vernon Dursley is the boss at Grunnings; there is no one higher on the totem pole than he is, and it would take more than his being shown to be an ass to get him fired.

45. Harry and His Pet Snake. I have no idea why the authors of some stories like to pair him up with Wanda the Friendly Cobra, nor do I care. It’s stupid and it should stop.

46. Friendly Goblins. Oh come on! As Rowling described them, the goblins are a bunch of arrogant, mean-spirited, hard-case putzes. Arrogant, mean-spirited, hard-case putzes aren’t won over by remembering their name and wishing them well.

47. The Dursleys acting more evil than Heinrich Himmler. You've seen these stories, right? In them, the Dursleys torture Harry. They abuse him sexually. They conspire to get his money and kill him and his friends. They strangle Hedwig, set fire to his school things, and stab Harry multiple times before dumping him back in the cupboard. I'm surprised writers of this sort of story don't have Vernon grow a Snidely Whiplash moustache, just so he can twist it.

48. Girl!Blaise stories written after 16 July 2005. Before HBP was published, you might possibly be excused for writing one of these pieces of shit by claiming ignorance of the fact that Blaise is a boy's name, has always been a boy's name, and will pretty much always be a boy's name. But after? Well, now you're just being pig-headed... And don't you dare tell me "Oh, well, it can be used as a girl's name!" Only by people who have no fucking clue what they are doing to their daughter when they give her a boy's name. And even if people do give a girl the name Blaise, that doesn't change the fact that its still a boy's name. I can name my daughter "Edgar" if I want... doesn't mean that she's not toting around a dude's name!

49. Describing a fancy meal and getting it wrong. I know this is a bit specific to me, but what can I say... I'm a chef by profession, I take pride in it, and I know that the writers who aren't chefs are doing their best, but I'm sure there have been times with you guys out there when a writer has someone do something involving our chosen career and gets it wrong. You sort of cringe, right? Stories where the characters go to a fancy black tie dinner and the writer either describes the food wrong (for the record, Jerusalem artichokes are not "just another kind of artichoke"... they're the roots of the sunflower plant and thus closer to potatoes or jicama than artichokes, which are flowers), or select a menu that is either badly combined (duck followed by mussels? not if you don't want your dinner guests to get nauseus over the conflicting lingering aftertastes) or are simply in the wrong order (the aperitif comes after the appetizer course, not after the main course...) bug me, because its clear in these cases that the writer just googled "fancy food" or something and tossed together what looked really, really classy regardless of whether or not the food in question worked together. I know its a nitpick, but it bugs me... So to combat this, I hereby offer myself as a food consultant, should anyone wish to write this sort of scene in their upcoming stories.

50. Stories with summaries that talk about OCs as if they were part of the canon crew. I refuse to read stories that have summaries like "Harry, Luna, and Cynthia have to jump through hoops and achieve an unlikely outcome to stop Voldemort". My first reaction is to think "Who the fark is Cynthia?" My second reaction is to think, "Probably a MarySue. Pass."

51. Future wrap-up chapters. You know, the ones where in a handful of paragraphs the writer describes the next hundred years after the story ends? I hate those. I don't know what it is that gets under my skin, but I hate them.

52. Time travel re-do fics where there are no (or virtually no) unpleasant consequences to changing the timeline. Its a long-held principle of time travel stories that the further you go from the point of change, the less like the original timeline the new one looks. Make too many changes, and you eventually lose the ability to predict what happens. And (and this is vastly important), bad things happen all the time, so why shouldn't they happen in the new timeline also?

53. Pairing anyone with anyone "just because". I don't mind stories where Harry (for example) ends up with Hermione or Tonks or Luna or heck, even Pansy Parkinson if the basis for the relationship is laid in a reasonable, intelligent manner that doesn't involve Ginny suddenly becoming the reincarnation of Elizabeth Bathory or Lucretia Borzia or something. I can even dig stories where Ginny just isn't that into Harry. But I want something more than some one-liner reason for Harry to be with another person. And this applies to every ship out there. I hate it when authors throw characters together just because without explaining why those characters would make a good couple.

54. Everything cool was created by wizards, and everyone important in history was secretly a wizard. Albert Einstein? He was a wizard. Benjamin Franklin? Wizard. The Beatles? Wizards. And they were wizards because obviously Muggles suck ass and can't get anything done themselves.

55. Continual misspellings of words taken from canon. I'm not talking the occasional homonym-substitution that gets missed by the spell-checker and the beta, or the occasional typo that still manages to slip through despite the spell-checker and the beta. I'm talking about spelling it "Voldermort" instead of "Voldemort" every time you use the name. Or spelling it Arvada Kedavra. Or "Expelliramus" every time you mean "Expelliarmus". That sort of thing is easy to prevent, so prevent it.

56. Everybody needs a "Marauder Name!" No, everyone bloody well doesn't need a Marauder name. Doing so is dumb and takes away the special nature of the Marauders. And if you have Harry called "Prongslet" in your story, you deserve a good caning.

57. Hypersensitive and self-deluded quasi-authors whose over-inflated sense of self-worth is a boon to Compulsive Snarkers like myself. This one is pretty self-explanatory. It was suggested that I add this one by a friend of mine who shall remain nameless. This friend, however, said that she got it from the "Worldmaker's an arrogant asshole" thread over on Dark Lord Potter. When she told me that, I immediately agreed to add it. Who am I to turn down honest criticism after all. Its only the arrogant critics whose attitude is "my shit-don't-stink" that land on my Fun With Idiots list. And this one I agree with. But I do want to add something...

57a. Reviewers and critics who don't understand the concept of "deconstruction" or "parody", or even "subtlety". That's a clue, folks. See where it leads you.

58. Descriptions of hair as a way of "identifying" the character. This is a sure sign that the writer of the story is a teenage girl. Consider the following, taken from an actual story: "She sat up and ran her fingers through her shoulder length auburn hair and yawned." We didn't need to know that her hair was a) shoulder length or b) auburn unless the color and length of her hair actually mattered for some reason. Referring to a character, especially a main character, by their hair color is simply bad writing.

59. Using the Phrase "Captured (His/Her/Its) Lips" When Referring to Kissing: This is hackneyed, dumb, and overly melodramatic. In addition, it makes the writer sound like they're 14 and haven't done a lot of kissing.

60. Gloating About the Obvious Cliff-Hanger You've Put at the End of Your Chapter is Stupid: You've seen it. You get to the end of the chapter and Harry's surrounded by Death Eaters and monsters and the chapter ends and the writer says something like, "I know, I'm evil." No, they aren't being evil, and they aren't being clever. They're following a literary tradition that dates back thousands of years. It isn't special, and gloating about it makes the writer seem childish.

61. Using the phrase "nee" every God-damned time you mention a married woman's name. Look, asshole, you really don't need to tell us that Andromeda Tonks was once Andromeda Black every fucking time you mention her name. Same with Narcissa Malfoy, Molly Weasley, Alice Longbottom, or any other married woman in the story. We already know that they used to be Narcissa Black, Molly Prewett, and Alice Prewett. Its jarring, off-putting, and unnecessary when you do this. Stop it.

62. Beginning a new chapter with a full of recap for the previous chapters of your story so far. Its doubly bad if you are basically just quoting the previous chapters verbatim. Trust us, if we need to refresh our memory, we can just skip back a couple of chapters an read forward from there.


Things I Can't Stand in Buffy the Vampire Slayer Fan Fiction

As with the previous list, these are not in order of intensity. They're just in order of when I thought of them. In no particular order, these are the things that will make me stop reading a story. They drive me up the wall in irritation. Please note that these aren't the only things that will make me stop reading a story... these are just the ones I've written down. I reserve the right to expand this list as I choose, when I choose.

Oh, and if I've left an unfavorable review for one of your stories, I don't want to hear how you're not really bad because you haven't broken any of these rules. You can be a piss-poor writer and not break any of these rules...

1. BINO Stories. And of course, BINO stands for "Buffy in Name Only". Once again, setting a story in an alternative universe is cool, but when your "alternate universe" simply doesn't contain any of the identifying characteristics of the source material other than (for example) character names, then its not really a Buffy story, is it?

2. Mopey!Buffy/Mopey!Willow/Mopey!Xander: All three of these characters went through some traumatic shit during their journey through the series, and its understandable if they would occasionally have their dark periods. But Jesus Christ riding on a sidecar, do you have to write the entire series as one huge mopefest?

3. Author Interjections. Didn't like them when they were in the Harry Potter list, why would I like them here?

4. Slash. Once again for the learning impaired, I am not talking about simply matching up gay characters. When I say “slash”, I mean those stories that place characters that are strictly heterosexual in canon into homosexual relationships. This has nothing to do with homosexuality and everything to do with turning characters into something they are not. So no, I don't have any objection to you pairing up Willow and Buffy because guess what: they've both had lesbian relationships in canon. Now if you were to pair Xander with another guy, I'd have a problem.

5. Faith having only one setting: foul-mouthed sex bomb. Believe it or not, Faith was a rather complex character with a lot of hidden layers. Turning her into little more than a superpowered street whore with the mouth of a sailor doesn't interest me and makes me think you're a wretched writer.

6. Kennedy Hate: Yeah, yeah, she was a boring, badly devised replacement for Tara, who was one of the best characters ever featured in the series. But she wasn't an ogre, a serial killer, or a sociopath, so stop trying to turn her into one.

7. Male Slayers: No. Just, no. The closest thing to this I'd accept is a trans-man becoming a Slayer, because such a person is still genetically female.

8. Anachronisms: If you set your story while Buffy and the Scoobies are still at Sunnydale High, remember that unless you specifically state that you're changing the timing, you're looking at the years 1996 through 2003.

9. Getting Names Wrong: Buffy's first name was really Buffy. Says so on her tombstone. At no point in the series was she referred to as Elizabeth. Xander Harris's first name is actually Alexander and his middle name is LaVelle. Willow Rosenberg's middle name is Danielle. Also, Dawn's middle name was never revealed during the series. I know the fandom has assumed its Marie, but it was never explicitly stated. Faith's surname (Lehane), and Kendra's surname (Young) were both determined by Joss Whedon after the show had ended. Angel's first name was originally "Liam", but no last name has ever been revealed. And Spike's actual name is "William Pratt".

10. Having Faith say "five by five" every eight words. While she's never really been formally educated past a certain point, Faith is not an idiot and does have a fully functional vocabulary. Yes, she used that phrase on occasion, but she also told people that things were all right, okay, going good, peachy, fine, and so on. This is not the only way she has of telling other people that she's okay (even when she isn't), so please try and spread it out some. Okay?

11. On a related thing, the overdoing of the Scooby-speakage-like stuff, what with it happening every other sentence. Yes, Scooby speak is fun. That said, if you overuse it, your characters don't sound cool... they sound like fucking morons. Just like Faith, Buffy and her friends have a fully-functioning vocabulary, and unlike Faith, they actually graduated High School. Hell, Buffy and Willow even have some college under their belts.

12. Check Your Briticisms. Yes, I understand that Buffy the Vampire Slayer is enjoyed by people around the world, and that's a good thing. But, these characters are Americans. Which means they don't take the lift to their flat, they take the elevator to their apartment. They don't go on holiday they go on vacation and while on vacation they don't wear swimming costumes they wear bathing suits. They aren't likely to take afternoon tea, but when they do eat they'll eat more than just pizza and burgers. If you're not an American, please do some basic research. At least as much research as I do when I write British characters.

13. Whistler Explains It All: Especially in "someone lands in another universe" stories and suddenly Whistler is there to explain the plot for the reader. No! That's horrid. Just let your characters figure it out for themselves, and hey, how about sometimes they get it wrong because they aren't omniscient?

14. Over-Using the Devon Coven: Okay, so they're a group of witches and spell-casters in England. They are not the Omniscient Council of Magical Whatever. Sure, they empowered Giles so he could face off against Evil!Willow, but he got his ass kicked in the end.

15. Instant Acceptance of Vampires: Within 30 seconds of someone giving the "Slayer Speech" (the one that begins, "The world is older than you know...") everyone listening is not only on-board with acceptance of the supernatural, but they also know all of Buffy's secrets and are loyal members of the Scooby Gang. Its a huge cliche and not very realistic at all.

16. Using the Phrase "Captured (His/Her/Its) Lips" When Referring to Kissing: This is hackneyed, dumb, and overly melodramatic. In addition, it makes the writer sound like they're 14 and haven't done a lot of kissing.

17. Not Following Through on Removing Characters: If you remove a character from Sunnydale (or L.A.) when they didn't in canon, for one reason or another, by one means or another (they move, they die, they travel to the dimension next door, whatever), you need to follow through on their absence. Obviously, what that means varies from situation, character, timing and writer, but acknowledge that things will be going differently, and such that will be noticeable.

18. Buffy is Always Right Syndrome: Not in the sense that Buffy thinks she's always right - that's veiled bashing - but casting her as always in the right, usually as a response to bashing (going too far in the other direction as it were). She wasn't always in the right in the show, and she certainly wouldn't be in the eyes of all the characters all the time (even her friends/Giles). This applies to everyone, albeit it bothers me personally the most with Buffy.

18a. Xander is Always Right Syndrome and Willow is Always Right Syndrome are just as bad.

19. Explaining Away a Character's Stupid Decisions: Sometimes people make really fucking stupid, selfish or idiot decisions. Not everything is better in context, so don't create elaborate justifications for every canonical brainfail a character has - or even some.

20. Demonizing Xander for the "kick his ass" lie: Given how weak-willed and unstable Buffy was regarding the necessity to destroy Angelus, and given that she was demonstratably more willing to let him keep on killing more people than she was to just wipe his murderous ass out, Xander made the right call. I don't care that they later tried to portray this lie as a "betrayal". Buffy was full of it. Xander made the right call.

21. Try to Remember That Buffy Doesn't Have Huge Breasts. Sarah Michelle Gellar, who is Buffy's physical model, remember, is by her own admission, barely a B-Cup. The actress has made jokes in the past about how small her own tits are. Describing Buffy's boobs as anything other than small is ridiculous.

22. Torturing Your Characters Is Not Entertainment: Unrelenting angst is not storytelling. I'm not saying don't make things hard for your characters, or not have them go through bad times, or not have them have to earn their happy ending. I'm saying don't make it one damned thing after another without a break from the misery. Making things worse and worse and worse for your characters without them gaining a single victory, even on a small scale, is just horrid. Even when things are going badly, remember to inject moments of joy to lighten the mood. Unending misery is tiring and boring.

23. Gloating About the Obvious Cliff-Hanger You've Put at the End of Your Chapter is Stupid: You've seen it. You get to the end of the chapter and Buffy's surrounded by vampires and demons and the chapter ends and the writer says something like, "I know, I'm evil." No, they aren't being evil, and they aren't being clever. They're following a literary tradition that dates back thousands of years. It isn't special, and gloating about it makes the writer seem childish.

24. If you're writing a Buffy crossover with one of the innumerable "Angsty Young Vampire" series, and you have put Buffy in a situation where it would be utterly logical and appropriate, given your plotline, for Buffy to ram a stake right through the Romantic Yet Angsty Vampire Lead's heart, just have her do it and then try to salvage the rest of your story rather than ruining the suspension of disbelief by trying to justify Buffy falling in love with him instead of killing him: Because doing otherwise is just plain dumb and unbelievable.


26. Making Fun of Buffy's Height: Buffy Summers is not unusually short. Actress Sarah Michelle Gellar stands 5'4" tall, and thus so is Buffy. In addition, actresses Amber Benson, Julie Benz, Bianca Lawson, Mercedes McNab, and Clare Kramer (just to name five Buffy actresses off the top of my head) are all 5'4" as well. In comparison, actresses Allyson Hannigan, Eliza Dushku, and Emma Caulfield are all 5'5" tall. In point of fact, the average height for an adult female human being in the United States is 5'4" tall. So Buffy was not "tiny" nor was she significantly shorter than most of the other female characters on the show. Having people constantly comment on her lack of height when the truth is she exactly meets the national average is thus bullshit. Rather, you should be commenting on how characters like Dawn and Joyce Summers (each 5'7"), Drusilla (5'8"), and Cordelia Chase (5'10") are all unusually tall compared to most women in America. (Thanks go to Julie Q for pointing this out to me.)


Fun With Idiots

I received the following private message from someone calling themselves "LadyLilyMalfoy", User ID: 904034. She's apparently not only one of the "Sober Universe" yahoos who object to what Rowling put into the Epilogue, her name tends to make me believe she's one of the SnapeLovers too. Either way, she apparently got offended because I was telling people what to think or something. Not that I'm telling people what to think... I'm just telling people that they are morons for thinking certain things. Anyway, here's what this gem of intellectual brilliance sent me:

Message begins:

You are so bloody critical!! Do you actually have something nice to say about anything?

You are just like the worst kind of flamer; you think because you're 'well read' and write things yourself, you have the right to critisize [sic] other people's things and beliefs!!

Ugh! People like you piss me off so much! No wonder your wife or whatever left you!

Ever heard of the phrase if you haven't got anything nice to say, don't say anything at all? I know this is hypocritical, but at least I'm not having ago at everyone on my profile!

The whole POINT of fanfiction is to write about what you WISHED happen, not necessarily what did happen. People are allowed to be dissapointed [sic] just becuase [sic] you're a boring old idiot who has no imagniation [sic, doesn't mean the rest of us should.

Maybe you should take notice of what other people are saying to you, or do you think you're completely right just because you're an 'adult' and we're kids? People like you nauseate me!!

Lily M

Message ends.

I have the right to criticize other people's things and beliefs because I have a right to criticize other people's things and beliefs. Just as other people, including the hypocritical moron who calls herself "LadyLilyMalfoy", have the right to criticize my things and beliefs. That's the great thing about Freedom of Expression: it cuts both ways.

As I say elsewhere in this screed, your right to hold a silly-ass opinion in no way prevents the opinion from being silly. Nor does it protect you from having someone else come up and point out how silly-assed your opinion is.

So... to everyone who thinks... or rather doesn't think... just like this LLM person, kiss my wide white ass.

And for the record, my wife didn't leave me. She died of cancer after a prolonged and extremely painful illness. But hey, thanks for taking an interest, you insensitive bitch.


Fun With Idiots II

So a genius who calls himself EfficientLaziness (user 1985431) has sent me this brilliant piece of editorial wisdom:

Message Begins:

"Good writing shitty story. Seems to me you've bought into feminist bullshit hook line and sinker. Really "Old boys club"? Fuck you cunt."

Message Ends.

Apparently Gabriel (that's his real name) here has trouble differentiating the attitudes of a character with the attitudes of a writer. Its pathetic really. As well, his choice of curse is really indicatory. I'm thinking he 13, maybe 14, and has just felt his balls drop. Oh well. Our Gabriel here is obviously well on his way to being a lonely antisocial neck-beard who lives in his parent's basement and spends his Tuesday night masturbating to someone else's sex life while getting his jollies as an internet troll.

Pathetic, really. And sad, very sad.


Fun With Idiots III

A true saint in human form who calls herself lateVMlover wrote an atrocious little story called "Scoobies in a Marvel World" in which a character was effectively raped. By Thor and the other Asgiardians, no less. The character was kidnapped to Asgard against her will without so much as a "Pardon Me" from Thor. The character's entire identity was altered against her will and despite the ongoing protests of both her and her family with the excuse that "When the process is over, she'll tell you herself she's fine with it." After her mind and body are violated -- including the brainwashing, folks -- she of course tells her family "No, my kidnapping and the subsequent destruction of my identity, not to mention the forced changes my body has gone through, all against my will while I was screaming for them to stop, is all okay because I'm brainwashed now."

And in response her family's reaction is basically to shrug and say "Oh, well, since you're brainwashed now, I guess you getting raped like that is fine."

When I pointed out how atrocious this was, and how she (lateVMlover, that is) was basically writing a rape fantasy story in which a young lady was raped and her rape was then justified as being a good thing for her, lateVMlover first hit me with "Don't like it, don't read it." As if I didn't stop reading her piece of shit little story the moment I got to this part. She also tossed this little gem into the mix:

Quote Begins:

"You are obviously one of those egotistical males who believes he's always right."

Quote Ends.

Yes, obviously that's the only possible reason why I might find a rape fantasy an indefensible piece of crap.

So let's review. This woman writes a rape story, tries to justify it with the old standard "If they enjoy it, its not rape" excuse, and then when someone points out that she's writing a rape story, she gets huffy and makes a statement about the reviewer based on the reviewer's gender. So not only is she a sociopath who likes rape stories, she's also a raging anti-male sexist.

And people wonder why I call this section of my profile "Fun With Idiots."


Fun With Idiots IV

So an obviously budding Nobel-prize winning geneticist -- not to mention he's a Brony, and aren't they always Special in that short bus sort of way -- who calls himself RHJunior (ID: 2991318) objected to my story by calling out a niggling detail I dropped into Origin Story to explain why SHIELD knew that Alex Harris was an alien. Specifically, the detail was that she has a quadruple-helix DNA strand. This is actual DC Comics canon: Superman, Supergirl, Power Girl, and all other Kryptonians ever to have lived have this same DNA structure. Anyway, his first message was simple:

Quote Begins:

"Quadruple helix DNA..."


Quote Ends.

Well, yeah, I know that. Thing is, its canon from DC Comics, it had a purpose in the story, so I threw it in. Besides, this is just a story, right? This is a place where you go to read other people's casual writing, not to attend genetics classes. I mean, sure, its incorrect, but so the fuck what, right? So my response was intended as a way to end this incipient argument before it began. I sent to him a message that said that, yeah, I know, but hey, its just a story. Specifically, I cited Bellisario's Maxim ("You shouldn't examine this stuff too closely") and Hodgeson's Law ("Repeat to yourself, 'It's just a show, I should really just relax'").

Anyway, apparently, my response just enraged this would-be Francis Crick even more, because he responded with a loud, raging diatribe.

Quote Begins:

"Bellisario and Hodgeson mean nothing if you ruin suspension of disbelief... for ANY group of readers."

"Hell, it should be a general writing rule: "Spock does not need to explain everything." In other words, DON'T USE TECHNOBABBLE WHERE IT ISN'T NEEDED, AND NEVER USE BAD SCIENCE. It will not kill you if occasionally your fictional scientists throw their hands in the air and say "It makes no sense!" In fact anyone who knows anything about scientific research would tell you it's a lot more realistic for the guys in the labcoat to say "damnfino" once in a while... especially in a genre where the known laws of physics get a regular trouncing. "

"Putting that gibble-gabble about "quadruple helix DNA" does nothing for the story, and only spoils it for people with even a public school understanding of genetics and/or chemistry (aka everyone who wasn't raised under a rock.) If you don't understand what you're writing about, DON'T WRITE ABOUT IT. Simply throwing in some vague fluff about "DNA analysis was inconclusive/makes no sense" would have served the same purpose and not spoiled the story's verisimiltude."

"You can find thousands of examples of bad movie science that ruined a story. Armageddon (at 18 days before impact, a Texas-sized asteroid would be as bright as the stars of Orion's belt , 2012 ("OMG, the Neutrinos have mutated!" --that sentence makes my BRAIN HURT), Voyage to the bottom of the Sea (distraught audience members have been known to scream "ICE FLOATS!" in the theatres where this was screened)... you will never, ever find an example outside of MST3K where bad science and lazy writing made a story BETTER."

Quote Ends.

He so missed the point. No, he was feeling morally outraged about a story in which -- Horror of Horrors! -- there was a scientific error. Well, I couldn't just let this go, so I responded in what I felt was a rational and calm way. To whit, this is my response:

You know what?

Go fuck yourself.

This is fanfiction, not a genetics textbook. The science used is comic book science, not real science, and the scene in question is based in the "Superman" comics where the quadruple helix DNA of Kryptonians is actually canon. So if you want to whine to someone, go whine to DC Comics.

Let me repeat this, because it sounds vaguely important, and because it is important, I want it to sink in.


For a third time, it is not intended to be real science, it was never intended to be real science, and your insistence that it be real science is bullshit. If, in a story about flying women who can juggle tanks and men in suits of powered armor and other men with the powers of a humanoid spider, the part that breaks your suspension of disbelief is a minor side-note that was inserted in my story to give SHIELD a reason to realize that she's not a human being but rather an alien -- and oh look, I'm a writer and I actually know what I am doing and I didn't include it as "fluff" but for plot purposes, thank you very much you arrogant pismire shit-stain -- then the problem lies with you and your arrogant need to lord something over someone else and not with my fucking story.

My first response was an attempt to give you an out before you said something that made you look mentally deficient and anal retentive. And of course, rather than realize this and go, "Right, its just a story posted on a fan fiction sight, its not intended to be classic literature", you went and escalated like the idiot you are.

So again, please do go fuck yourself. And seriously, if a fan fiction story can get you so angry you rant at me over a minor, unimportant detail I threw in strictly as so I wasn't painting myself into a corner, then you need to stop reading fucking fan fiction.

But in one thing, I thank you. I haven't had someone volunteer for my "Fun With Idiots" editorials in a long time.


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Dragonlord by Dragonspectre01 reviews
As Master of Death time refused to touch Harry. So, he decided to use the Veil seeing as his world was slowly dying. But the Veil, it turns out, was not what he expected. And so begins the journey of the Master of Death in Westeros.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Game of Thrones - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Supernatural - Chapters: 76 - Words: 248,135 - Reviews: 2886 - Favs: 7,406 - Follows: 9,168 - Updated: 9/20 - Published: 9/16/2021 - Harry P., Oberyn M., Daenerys T., Barristan S.
The Bloody Stark by fmfan1980 reviews
Soon after the Battle of Blackwater Bay, Sansa learned she was being wed to Tyrion Lannister. The day she was told of this truth, a stranger appeared in her dream offering her power to destroy her enemies and immortality. But to gain these powers she would have to die and rise once again as an undead being. VAMP!Sansa (AU.)
Game of Thrones - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 27,769 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 110 - Follows: 128 - Updated: 9/4 - Published: 11/26/2022
Hear Me Roar by Bitmad reviews
When a lawyer if reborn as the eldest Lannister child, she must find her way in the world. Using her ability from her past life and knowledge of ASOIAF, she carves a new path for herself. Her original intention was to not change the storyline as much as possible, but as she learns and lives around the characters of the books she once read, she cannot help but intervene.
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 48,189 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 517 - Follows: 709 - Updated: 8/31 - Published: 4/24/2020 - Cersei L., Jaime L., Robb S., OC
Mythos Effect by Omniscent1 reviews
A crossover between Mass Effect and Cthulhutech. Humanity has won the Aeon War and has since expanded and thrived. How will the galaxy fare with this new power?
Crossover - Cthulhu Mythos & Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 26 - Words: 207,839 - Reviews: 1774 - Favs: 4,918 - Follows: 5,696 - Updated: 5/2 - Published: 6/5/2013 - Saren A., Shepard, OC
Gods Among Us by arturus reviews
Fate is a funny thing. Harry Potter and his friends survived their trial by fire and defeated Voldemort. A year has passed and Hermione Granger is apprenticed as a Curse Breaker. When she discovers an ancient tomb she talks Harry into helping with the excavation. Now they are trapped and they'll need a miracle to survive. HP/BSG (now a bit of Stargate in the mix) Major edit 2020/21
Crossover - Harry Potter & Battlestar Galactica: 2003 - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 26 - Words: 239,661 - Reviews: 1062 - Favs: 2,364 - Follows: 3,121 - Updated: 3/19 - Published: 1/9/2012 - Harry P., Hermione G.
Falling Together by purastella reviews
Hermione looked around at the strange world she found herself in and couldn't help feeling tired. She'd lived this all before, and she hadn't liked the ending. And maybe she could delude herself into thinking things might be different, but part of her felt like she was watching a reboot of her story and everyone knew that remakes were never as good as the original.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 25,594 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 150 - Follows: 262 - Updated: 3/12 - Published: 10/2/2022 - [Hermione G., Boromir]
When the Roses Bloom Again by TheBlack'sResurgence reviews
With Sirius dead, Harry seizes an unexpected opportunity to save his godfather, only to find himself in more trouble than he could have imagined. Arriving in 1930s Britain, he now must navigate a new world, and a different threat still with Voldemort's emergence on the horizon. But first, there was a greater war he must face, and a new foe; a Dark Lord he knew not.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 109 - Words: 767,062 - Reviews: 5826 - Favs: 10,980 - Follows: 10,320 - Updated: 3/2 - Published: 9/12/2021 - [Harry P., Minerva M.] Charlus P., Arcturus B. - Complete
Potter Club by Razamataz22 reviews
Seven years is a long time. Especially when you have to do it twice. You know what you have to do and you think you know how you'll do it, so what can you do in the meantime? Live up your family legacy of course. It's time for a changing of the guard; the Marauders time is over, now it's time for Potter Club to step up
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 46 - Words: 158,837 - Reviews: 939 - Favs: 3,693 - Follows: 5,003 - Updated: 12/27/2022 - Published: 6/7/2016 - Harry P., Hermione G., Susan B.
Harry Potter and the Wand of Uru by Altairadactyl reviews
After slipping diagonally through time and space to a familiar time in an unfamiliar world, Harry finds himself fighting to save a future that's not quite what he remembers. Fun fact! austin-flare-potter says "I never hated something like I hate Harry in this story."
Crossover - Harry Potter & Avengers - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 57,315 - Reviews: 1632 - Favs: 3,781 - Follows: 4,839 - Updated: 10/7/2022 - Published: 6/27/2008 - Harry P., Daphne G., Tracey D., Loki
Changeling by GoWithTheFlo20 reviews
The wizarding world called her a Metamorphmagus, only because they had no other label to slap on her forehead. The truth was, Metamorphmagus was the closest thing to what Harry was that anybody could find, and even then, the tag was ill fitting. It was like calling a tiger a cat. Close, but not quite adequate. Changeling!Harry Fem!Harry
Crossover - StarTrek: Deep Space Nine & Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 8 - Words: 42,990 - Reviews: 289 - Favs: 781 - Follows: 977 - Updated: 9/12/2022 - Published: 12/13/2018 - Odo, Weyoun, Harry P.
The GOTS Cast Saves Westeros - One Insert at a Time by High Plains Drifter reviews
Sean and Charles can't have all the fun. So as the Muse strikes, this one trick pony of a scribbler will upload whole short stories or snippets of a story involving a member of the cast from the show inserted into their corresponding character. Will Kate Dickie succeed? Will Joe Dempsie fail? Will Jason Momoa make things worse? Will Emilia Clark die horribly? Only time will tell.
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 12 - Words: 23,268 - Reviews: 141 - Favs: 275 - Follows: 330 - Updated: 5/21/2022 - Published: 7/1/2020
The Raven's Plan by The Sithspawn reviews
The Second War for the Dawn is over, the Others have won. All that is left is one insane plan.
Game of Thrones - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 48 - Words: 252,593 - Reviews: 2563 - Favs: 3,986 - Follows: 4,352 - Updated: 5/18/2022 - Published: 12/11/2017 - Jon S., Tyrion L., Bran S., Jaime L.
Charles Dance Saves Westeros by High Plains Drifter reviews
Will the actor prove an improvement over the original Tywin? Another not so self insert into Westeros; which ever needs saving, because readers will never find a more wretched world of scum and villainy than this.
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 24 - Words: 128,842 - Reviews: 960 - Favs: 1,694 - Follows: 2,098 - Updated: 3/18/2022 - Published: 5/31/2018
Protective Custody by Virodeil reviews
The Prime Minister of the mundane world was more proactive about the threat of Sirius Black in 1993. She contacted an ally to help with one part of the problem, namely the safety of a thirteen-year-old boy who was said to be the criminal's foremost target. The ally secreted him somewhere special… and things snowballed from there.
Crossover - Stargate: SG-1 & Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 7 - Words: 10,208 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 459 - Follows: 821 - Updated: 3/2/2022 - Published: 11/4/2020 - Gen. Hammond, OC, Harry P.
Yesterday is Tomorrow (Everything is Connected) by Kneazle reviews
James Potter went five years at Hogwarts without realizing Lily had a little sister. Hermione would have preferred if he never realized she existed. Now she's stuck, in Potter's circle of awareness, and maintaining the timeline. Not like he makes it easy, or something.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 259,514 - Reviews: 3985 - Favs: 6,249 - Follows: 7,514 - Updated: 2/20/2022 - Published: 2/9/2018 - [Hermione G., James P.] Regulus B., Barty C. Jr.
The Pack Survives by Youngthundercat67 reviews
The last thing he saw before his head was taken off was the horror in his daughter's eyes. Then came the flashes, the visions of the atrocities that would happen to his family but the gods have given him a second chance. What changes can Eddard Stark make to win the Game of Thrones? Mix of books and show. AU.
Game of Thrones - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 59 - Words: 165,611 - Reviews: 1640 - Favs: 4,198 - Follows: 5,132 - Updated: 2/15/2022 - Published: 10/3/2019
Whispers of a Raven by TheBlack'sResurgence reviews
The world around him had crumbled as the Ministry fell. He had become the hunted, and with only his wits, resilience and an ominous raven, he'd had to learn to survive. But why was he so compelled to go to the one place he knew he should avoid? The whispers urged him as did the dreams that plagued his sleep. Perhaps Death truly was the beginning... Time-travel, Harry/Narcissa
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 35 - Words: 347,072 - Reviews: 3700 - Favs: 13,013 - Follows: 11,006 - Updated: 11/23/2021 - Published: 4/18/2021 - [Harry P., Narcissa M.] Arcturus B., Death - Complete
Avenger Goddess by Reyel reviews
"I used to want to save the world. This beautiful place... But I knew so little then. It is a land of magic and wonder, worth cherishing in every way, but the closer you get, the more you see the great darkness simmering within." WW/Avengers crossover. Wonder Woman in Marvel Cinematic Universe.
Crossover - Avengers & Wonder Woman - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 32 - Words: 422,778 - Reviews: 2350 - Favs: 3,858 - Follows: 3,975 - Updated: 11/17/2021 - Published: 7/3/2017 - [Captain America/Steve R., Diana/Wonder Woman] Black Widow/Natasha R., Iron Man/Tony S.
A Rose and a Lion by Gracques reviews
Tywin Lannister is dead. Tyrion Lannister becomes Lord of Casterly Rock and Warden of the West three years before the beginning of Season 1. A new alliance will be forged that will change the political balance of Westeros and the War of the Five Kings.
Game of Thrones - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 116 - Words: 656,301 - Reviews: 2219 - Favs: 2,000 - Follows: 2,101 - Updated: 9/4/2021 - Published: 8/7/2016 - [Tyrion L., Margaery T.] Jon S., Sansa S.
Star Granger - Season 2 by SFD reviews
Enough build-up - Time to go to space! Explore! Fight Goa'uld! But in order to do that, one needs spaceships, and weapons. Not just Precious, which is, let's be frank here - a 5000 YO, POS of a ship. The world is also in need of saving from time to time, otherwise we will all need to depend on SGC, and all. It's generally a good idea to read a story from the beginning.
Crossover - Stargate: SG-1 & Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 14 - Words: 52,042 - Reviews: 254 - Favs: 648 - Follows: 752 - Updated: 8/12/2021 - Published: 2/18/2021 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] S. Carter, D. Jackson - Complete
Mass Effect: End of Days by Postmeat reviews
An ancient danger threatens the galaxy, unknown to all. A humanity which never discovered Prothean ruins, expanding through space on their own, emerges. Joined with the machines they created, hardened by war with a terrifying enemy, they read the writing on the wall. But will the galactic community already there listen to these newcomers, stirring up trouble everywhere they go?
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Suspense - Chapters: 20 - Words: 234,080 - Reviews: 742 - Favs: 2,974 - Follows: 3,584 - Updated: 8/1/2021 - Published: 3/8/2015 - Admiral Hackett, Shadow Broker, Shepard, Rachni Queen
The Purge by Redbayly reviews
When a man is pushed to the end of his tether, be prepared for violent retribution. The magical world had better prepare itself for the turning of the tide. If the magical government cannot be trusted to protect its people, then Harry Potter will just have to do it himself. Trigger Warning: Graphic depictions of violence.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Crime/Horror - Chapters: 15 - Words: 44,255 - Reviews: 957 - Favs: 3,619 - Follows: 4,029 - Updated: 7/2/2021 - Published: 9/8/2016 - Harry P.
The Winter Witch by Kneazle reviews
Hermione realized it began with a sense of Impending Doom and finished with a battle outside her tent. The deciding line between staying and helping Robb Stark, or returning to her universe, is getting harder to see the longer she's in Westeros. But it's a decision that she has to make, or it's one that will be made for her. Part 1 & Part 2 complete! Part 3 now ongoing.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Game of Thrones - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 34 - Words: 288,907 - Reviews: 2911 - Favs: 4,738 - Follows: 5,546 - Updated: 6/23/2021 - Published: 10/15/2017 - [Hermione G., Robb S.] Roose B.
Wearing Robert's Crown by drakensis reviews
The Robert Baratheon who takes the crown in AC 283 is not the man who they expected, nor will he be the king they looked for. Through the eyes of others as the Seven Kingdoms seeks an new balance of power under a new dynasty. (SI).
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 46 - Words: 194,408 - Reviews: 1115 - Favs: 3,716 - Follows: 3,708 - Updated: 5/11/2021 - Published: 3/26/2016 - Eddard S./Ned, Stannis B., Tywin L., Jon A.
A Song of Manes and Antlers by Aldon Blackreyne reviews
Despite her caution, Cersei gives birth to trueborn son, Roland Baratheon, black of hair. (On Hiatus)
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 49 - Words: 211,955 - Reviews: 1136 - Favs: 3,825 - Follows: 4,212 - Updated: 5/1/2021 - Published: 11/23/2013 - [Margaery T., Joffrey B.] [OC, Sansa S.]
A Song of Guns, Germs and Steel by stannisthemannis1993 reviews
What if Westeros was mysteriously linked to the modern world, a short way into the start of the song of ice and fire?
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 68 - Words: 232,883 - Reviews: 1315 - Favs: 1,278 - Follows: 1,217 - Updated: 3/22/2021 - Published: 4/10/2020 - Eddard S./Ned, Robert B., Renly B., Tyrion L. - Complete
The Wolf and the Moon by Katie Macpherson reviews
Luna has always had a special relationship with Death, especially after her mother died. And after the final battle as she lies dying on the floor of the great hall, the spectre, claiming she was robbed of the life she should have had sends her to Westeros where she is reborn as the twin sister of Rhaegar Targaryen. DISCONTINUED
Crossover - Harry Potter & A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 142,385 - Reviews: 990 - Favs: 3,410 - Follows: 3,838 - Updated: 2/17/2021 - Published: 12/3/2016 - Luna L., Eddard S./Ned
Transcendent Humanity by Solaris242 reviews
Humanity never developed FTL. The Prothean archives contained no technology, no Element Zero, just a warning. Isolated from the rest of the galaxy for two thousand years, restricted to their only system, how will humanity have changed when they first meet the Turians? AU, alternate history of humanity and First Contact.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 27 - Words: 79,685 - Reviews: 2983 - Favs: 8,598 - Follows: 8,827 - Updated: 2/16/2021 - Published: 5/7/2013 - Complete
Incompatible System by mp3.1415player reviews
Technological incompatibility can cause serious issues even at a simple level. When it comes to interstellar travel, those issues can be quite profound...
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 16 - Words: 127,546 - Reviews: 949 - Favs: 3,848 - Follows: 4,437 - Updated: 1/5/2021 - Published: 8/18/2019
A Farmer's Tale by alltheuntold reviews
A 30-year-old American farmer is sent to the world of ASOIAF. Follow as he tries to create a life for himself. Slow development & pacing. Slice-of-Life style story. Act 2 is complete, Act 3 is in progress.
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Family - Chapters: 138 - Words: 308,295 - Reviews: 2258 - Favs: 4,007 - Follows: 4,292 - Updated: 12/16/2020 - Published: 2/16/2018 - OC
To Touch the Stars by Elsbeth Ravensblood reviews
Daphne Greengrass has a physical abnormality that makes her the target of abuse in the magical world. Dealing with it is hard...until somebody who knows what she's going through helps her. AU
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 22,662 - Reviews: 157 - Favs: 1,512 - Follows: 1,042 - Updated: 11/22/2020 - Published: 4/22/2018 - Harry P., Daphne G.
Yellow Submarine by deadwoodpecker reviews
Alternate Universe. Two hurting, almost broken people reach toward the sunlight. This story has implied sexual violence and a Ginny who is two years younger than she was in canon.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 34 - Words: 190,007 - Reviews: 1811 - Favs: 1,701 - Follows: 1,058 - Updated: 11/14/2020 - Published: 8/10/2008 - [Harry P., Ginny W.] - Complete
A Thin Veneer by AlbertG reviews
Captain James T. Kirk Chancellor Gorkon rescues a group of Human refugees from the far side of the galaxy. That simple act of kindness will be the spark a war that ranges across the galaxy and reveal the thinness of the veil that separates civilization fr
Crossover - StarTrek: Other & Babylon 5 - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 84 - Words: 449,627 - Reviews: 1818 - Favs: 1,233 - Follows: 1,036 - Updated: 9/8/2020 - Published: 7/3/2004 - Complete
Spirit Unto Dawn by free man writer reviews
Spartan's found only to be lost. A ship filled with humans in a galaxy not their own. The Spirit of Fire finds itself with new allies in a galaxy they are unfamiliar with, dealing with its own set of problems and apocalyptic enemies. Co-created and written with BulletStormX
Crossover - Halo & Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 119,845 - Reviews: 711 - Favs: 1,683 - Follows: 2,122 - Updated: 7/25/2020 - Published: 4/16/2020 - Master Chief/John-117, SPARTAN-B312/Noble Six, Tali'Zorah, Shepard
The Brightest Sun by Witless Maester reviews
Elia Martell expected to die in King's Landing. Harry Potter had died in his war. Two strangers are thrown together through some force. Raising three kids is hard, raising two of them to eventually rule a kingdom even harder, especially when you're trying to find a way to Westeros. Cross-posted on AO3.
Crossover - Harry Potter & A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 64 - Words: 216,671 - Reviews: 528 - Favs: 3,459 - Follows: 3,857 - Updated: 7/9/2020 - Published: 2/24/2020 - [Harry P., Elia M.]
Hermione Granger and the Serpent's Renaissance by epsi10n reviews
Salazar Slytherin is reborn as Hermione Granger. With her new identity as a muggleborn girl and her old reputation in tatters, Hermione sets out to start a new life for herself, a resurrection for House Slytherin, and a renaissance for the whole of the magical society.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 98 - Words: 292,716 - Reviews: 4343 - Favs: 7,042 - Follows: 8,096 - Updated: 6/6/2020 - Published: 1/22/2015 - Hermione G., Salazar S.
Father and Daughter by DWShadow3145 reviews
Hogwarts AU in which Arthur doesn't stand by while a young boy is being sent away to neglect and misery after saving his daughter's life. First person POV of Arthur and Ginny, starting at the end of the Chamber. Eventually covering all remaining five years. Eventual G/H.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 125,249 - Reviews: 110 - Favs: 276 - Follows: 405 - Updated: 5/18/2020 - Published: 1/24/2019 - [Harry P., Ginny W.] Arthur W.
Laughing Lion's Roar (Self Insert) by KevinKohl04 reviews
Tytos Lannister was a weak willed man who never learned the word 'NO' and bought his family to ruin and forced his son to become a monster. But what if he wasn't so incompetent? What if someone from our world became father of Tywin Lannister? Read to find out. ( Self Insert)
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 36,457 - Reviews: 333 - Favs: 1,705 - Follows: 2,121 - Updated: 5/7/2020 - Published: 7/14/2019
Let Madness Reign: An Aerys II SI by BasileusKomnenos reviews
Follow the tale of a man from our world navigate the political landscape of Westeros as the Mad King himself. Will he restore glory to House Targaryen or will he hasten its downfall?
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 17,939 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 434 - Follows: 578 - Updated: 4/26/2020 - Published: 10/2/2019 - Stannis B., Viserys T., Aerys T., Rhaella T.
Dodging Prison and Stealing Witches - Revenge is Best Served Raw by LeadVonE reviews
Harry Potter has been banged up for ten years in the hellhole brig of Azkaban for a crime he didn't commit, and his traitorous brother, the not-really-boy-who-lived, has royally messed things up. After meeting Fate and Death, Harry is given a second chance to squash Voldemort, dodge a thousand years in prison, and snatch everything his hated brother holds dear. H/Hr/LL/DG/GW.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 57 - Words: 646,435 - Reviews: 9391 - Favs: 20,455 - Follows: 23,433 - Updated: 4/21/2020 - Published: 10/23/2015 - [Harry P., Hermione G., Daphne G., Ginny W.]
Humanity's Rebirth by TallYapflip reviews
The First Contact War brought untold destruction to Earth, reducing Humanity to a shell of its former self. For 900 years, Humanity has been working tirelessly to lay claim to its own slice of the Milky Way Galaxy, and they are prepared to bring the Council to its knees to accomplish their goals. (Massive AU, New Technologies, and a far different humanity.)
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 22 - Words: 109,371 - Reviews: 587 - Favs: 2,377 - Follows: 2,839 - Updated: 1/28/2020 - Published: 3/4/2016 - [Samantha T., Shepard] Admiral Hackett, OC
The Abyss Gazes Also by JimW reviews
I'm not a cop, he thinks. I'm... not a cop. And that means there are a lot of things I can't do. But it also means... I don't have to play by the rules.
Castle - Rated: T - English - Drama/Crime - Chapters: 22 - Words: 81,280 - Reviews: 178 - Favs: 181 - Follows: 287 - Updated: 1/9/2020 - Published: 12/16/2011 - Rick C., Kate B., C. Burke, OC
Season of Change by Branchwraith reviews
There were only a few things in Harry Potter's life that were absolutes. He was the son of Lily and James Potter and that he was born male. What happens when he discovers the truth. AU Strong/Independent, Gender-Switch, Fem!Harry, Fem!Slash Mature Themes
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 35 - Words: 113,150 - Reviews: 1372 - Favs: 5,008 - Follows: 5,747 - Updated: 10/8/2019 - Published: 12/15/2013 - Harry P., Fleur D., Luna L., N. Tonks
The Havoc side of the Force by Tsu Doh Nimh reviews
I have a singularly impressive talent for messing up the plans of very powerful people - both good and evil. Somehow, I'm always just in the right place at exactly the wrong time. What can I say? It's a gift.
Crossover - Star Wars & Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Mystery - Chapters: 24 - Words: 207,600 - Reviews: 7731 - Favs: 18,574 - Follows: 20,645 - Updated: 8/24/2019 - Published: 9/6/2012 - Anakin Skywalker, Harry P.
Mass Effect: Newton's Second Law by Raven Studios reviews
Commander Jalissa A. Shepard is back. Now, coping with the fallout of her own death and caught in an unpleasant alliance of necessity, she and her crew scramble to stop the Collectors. Mass Effect 2 as told through 1000-word vignettes. (Cover images all belong to Bioware. As with Mass Effect itself, I'm just borrowing them and giving credit where it's due.)
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 426 - Words: 434,974 - Reviews: 2463 - Favs: 313 - Follows: 319 - Updated: 6/29/2019 - Published: 4/11/2012 - Garrus V., Miranda L., Shepard - Complete
Greyjoy alla Breve (SI) by ShaiGar reviews
Mirrored story from SpaceBattles - Volume 1 from AndrewJTalon. An SI takes over Theon Greyjoy when he's brought to Winterfell as a hostage, and proceeds to bring the Industrial Revolution to Westeros, with the contents of the internet in his mind.
Game of Thrones - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 49 - Words: 287,923 - Reviews: 453 - Favs: 2,117 - Follows: 1,730 - Updated: 3/29/2019 - Published: 7/10/2016 - Robb S., Theon G., Ramsay B. - Complete
Wave On, Old Glory by TallYapflip reviews
From the trenches of Anchorage to the court room, the Sole Survivor has led an interesting life. After awakening 210 years post-nuclear war, she encounters a group of settlers and a Minuteman from Quincy. She's given a chance, however slim it may be, to undo some of the damage done by the Great War. [F!SS/Piper, slow-burn, canon deviations later, some gore, and lots of patriotism.]
Fallout - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 64,915 - Reviews: 106 - Favs: 304 - Follows: 340 - Updated: 3/3/2019 - Published: 3/25/2018 - [Piper W., Sole Survivor] Preston G., Arthur Maxson
The Elvenqueen by PristinelyUngifted reviews
One person can make a difference: sometimes large, sometimes small. This is the story of a young witch who died under mysterious circumstances and woke up in a completely different world - a world she would change just by existing. Follow the journey of Hermione Granger as she walks the path to becoming Hermione Thranduiliel, the Elvenqueen.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 75,670 - Reviews: 1324 - Favs: 4,058 - Follows: 3,230 - Updated: 2/10/2019 - Published: 6/18/2016 - [Hermione G., Legolas] Aragorn, Thranduil - Complete
Cripples, Bastards and Broken Things by The Queen of Thornes reviews
We know no King, but the King in the North whose name is Stark. [Time-Travel AU]
Game of Thrones - Rated: T - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 23 - Words: 66,029 - Reviews: 904 - Favs: 4,040 - Follows: 4,686 - Updated: 1/11/2019 - Published: 7/4/2016 - Jon S., Sansa S., Bran S.
The Mountain's Range by The Passionate Admiral reviews
Self-Insert. Gregor Clegane was one of the worst people to have ever existed. But what if someone else lived his life? What if a modern person of sound mind and honorable character was reborn as The Mountain? How would his rational and reasonable mind impact the ultimate outcome of Westeros? He just might be able to change the world for the better... Feedback is appreciated.
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 85 - Words: 854,151 - Reviews: 2276 - Favs: 4,855 - Follows: 4,168 - Updated: 11/20/2018 - Published: 9/8/2016 - Daenerys T./Dany, Jon S., Gregor C., Dacey M. - Complete
Questions and Answers by little0bird reviews
When the past and present collide with the Potter/Weasley children... A bit AU with characters' names and some pairings. Family tree now posted on my profile page. 3/16/10 -- going back and cleaning up a few things; nothing major will change.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 105 - Words: 505,957 - Reviews: 5318 - Favs: 2,492 - Follows: 2,628 - Updated: 11/2/2018 - Published: 12/18/2007
Backward With Purpose Part I: Always and Always by deadwoodpecker reviews
AU. Harry, Ron, and Ginny send themselves back in time to avoid the destruction of everything they hold dear, and the deaths of everyone they love.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 55 - Words: 286,867 - Reviews: 5324 - Favs: 8,399 - Follows: 3,368 - Updated: 9/28/2018 - Published: 2/28/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Democracy by Starfox5 reviews
AU. Neville Longbottom had good cause to be happy. Voldemort and his Death Eaters had been defeated. His parents had been avenged. He had taken his N.E.W.T.s and was now taking his seat in the Wizengamot. Unfortunately, some of his friends weren't content with restoring the status quo ante and demanded rather extensive reforms.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 36,374 - Reviews: 282 - Favs: 1,002 - Follows: 444 - Updated: 9/25/2018 - Published: 9/22/2018 - [Neville L., Daphne G.] Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
The Tyranny of a Rational Mind by Saul Good reviews
Alexis and Castle approach a problem with logic.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Castle - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 7 - Words: 14,305 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 8/31/2018 - Published: 3/30/2014 - Rick C., Alexis C.
Dead World by erttheking reviews
Picard and the Enterprise-D investigate a planet that has undergone a catastrophic change. Patreon sponsored story
StarTrek: The Next Generation - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,616 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 15 - Published: 6/3/2018 - J. Picard, W. Riker - Complete
The Unsuspecting side of the Force by Tsu Doh Nimh reviews
A companion fic to "The Havoc side of the Force". Extra scenes and different perspectives from that story.
Crossover - Star Wars & Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 53,132 - Reviews: 1700 - Favs: 4,755 - Follows: 5,496 - Updated: 4/21/2018 - Published: 10/9/2012 - Anakin Skywalker, Harry P.
Winter Soldier in Westeros by MarshalofMontival reviews
Rhaegar and Lyanna thought they were home free; they didn't reckon with the Winter Soldier. Rated T for light-graphic violence and language.
Crossover - A song of Ice and Fire & Captain America - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 48 - Words: 111,819 - Reviews: 297 - Favs: 727 - Follows: 561 - Updated: 4/9/2018 - Published: 4/1/2017 - Complete
Tricked by Hayley128 reviews
When Faith wakes up from her coma things are not what they seem or what she remembers.
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 14 - Words: 56,474 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 143 - Follows: 234 - Updated: 2/25/2018 - Published: 8/21/2013 - Buffy S., Faith L.
The Black Princess: An SI Story by Barn Barn Barn reviews
"What shall you name her?" Jamie asked softly. Cersei gave no sign that she heard him. She remained as she had been, silently gazing down at the babe held to her breast. Cersei's fingers played over the wisps of dark hair that graced her firstborn's head, while a strange expression fixed his sweet sister's features. Uncertain, Jaime hesitantly offered, "Alysanne, perhaps?"
Crossover - A song of Ice and Fire & Game of Thrones - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 58,912 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 761 - Follows: 901 - Updated: 1/15/2018 - Published: 10/15/2017 - Joffrey B., OC, Tyrion L., Robert B.
Psi Effect by Cap'n Chryssalid reviews
A fun-loving asari mercenary finds herself a little in over her head when she ends up abducted by terrifying aliens from beyond the galactic frontier. These asari-like creatures call themselves 'humans.' They seem to be secretly nosing about on the borders of known space, acting through proxies, conducting covert operations, and they've got a deal for an enterprising asari...
Crossover - X-Com & Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 43 - Words: 387,570 - Reviews: 1460 - Favs: 3,861 - Follows: 4,398 - Updated: 1/2/2018 - Published: 7/19/2014 - U. Wrex, Daro'Xen, J. Garson, OC
The Quidditch World Cup by TheEndless7 reviews
After the war, things didn't go as planned for Harry. He tried to be an Auror, but it wasn't for him. Instead, he turned to Quidditch. Now, at the 2002 World Cup, he looks back on what went wrong and discovers what he always wanted.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 77,996 - Reviews: 433 - Favs: 2,007 - Follows: 911 - Updated: 12/25/2017 - Published: 3/31/2011 - Harry P., Luna L. - Complete
To Reach Without by inwardtransience reviews
He hadn't wanted to be Harry Potter anymore. Things would be simpler, he would be happier. He had been almost positive he would be happier if he were quite literally anybody else. At the moment, he couldn't think of a better demonstration of the warning "be careful what you wish for." ON INDEFINITE HIATUS.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 415,113 - Reviews: 472 - Favs: 1,134 - Follows: 1,413 - Updated: 11/23/2017 - Published: 3/26/2016 - Harry P., Hermione G., Albus D., Susan B.
I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For by kathryn518 reviews
Ahsoka Tano left the Jedi Order, walking away after their betrayal. She did not consider the consequences of what her actions might bring, or the danger she might be in. A chance run in with a single irreverent, and possibly crazy, person in a bar changes the course of fate for an entire galaxy.
Crossover - Star Wars & Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 344,480 - Reviews: 6123 - Favs: 18,065 - Follows: 19,367 - Updated: 9/17/2017 - Published: 4/2/2015 - Aayla S., Ahsoka T., Harry P.
Wind Shear by Chilord reviews
A sharp and sudden change that can have devastating effects. When a Harry Potter that didn't follow the path of the Epilogue finds himself suddenly thrown into 1970, he settles into a muggle pub to enjoy a nice drink and figure out what he should do with the situation. Naturally, things don't work out the way he intended.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 19 - Words: 126,280 - Reviews: 3231 - Favs: 18,423 - Follows: 10,211 - Updated: 7/6/2017 - Published: 5/31/2017 - Harry P., Bellatrix L., Charlus P. - Complete
Fallen by ForgerOfLies reviews
Harry Awakens from a 68 year coma which he went into after defeating Voldemort. Then he gets summoned... to buffyverse, everyone seems keen to calling him a big bad for some reason.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 36,394 - Reviews: 1314 - Favs: 5,143 - Follows: 5,749 - Updated: 7/5/2017 - Published: 12/14/2012 - Dawn S., Harry P.
Winter's Wrath by CelticPagan-3 reviews
Arya Stark left Westeros four years ago, but a chance meeting with two men of the Nights Watch prompts her to return to the place she once called home and reclaim what's rightfully hers. Travelling across Westeros, Arya gathers an army to take back the North, reliving old memories, reuniting with old friends, and trying to hide the person she has become - Full Summary Inside
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 141,624 - Reviews: 458 - Favs: 1,182 - Follows: 1,587 - Updated: 3/28/2017 - Published: 5/20/2013 - Arya S., Gendry
A Widow's Walk by PristinelyUngifted reviews
It happens in a flash of blue. One moment Natasha is standing amid the wreckage of Manhattan, and the next she… isn't. - In Which the Black Widow makes her mark on Westeros.
Crossover - Game of Thrones & Avengers - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 30,763 - Reviews: 357 - Favs: 2,261 - Follows: 1,168 - Updated: 3/13/2017 - Published: 6/18/2016 - [Black Widow/Natasha R., Tyrion L., Jaime L.] Jon S. - Complete
Begin Again by tenshi noyo Ryu Taiga reviews
Ruthie gets invited to a prestigious English boarding school and, in the wake of Sandy's pregnancy, decides to go. Three years later, a very different Ruthie Camden returns.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & 7th Heaven - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 3 - Words: 17,405 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 3/10/2017 - Published: 1/3/2015 - [Ruthie C., Martin B.] OC
The Tale of Nora Rigg by ManMadeOfLasers reviews
A novelization of a Fallout 4 play through, filled with dark humor, bad jokes, and cursing. This story will attempt to show the the kind of characterization that Fallout has trouble expressing, and will try to accurately depict the emotional range of the game. Rating based on unrepentant bad language, and to cover for anything untoward that may pop up.
Fallout - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 25,102 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 2/19/2017 - Published: 12/5/2016
The Siege of Shanxi by Made Nightwing reviews
2157: The Turian Hierarchy launches a secretive war against a new species known as 'humanity'. The first major battleground is the outlying colony world of Shanxi, defended by the 3rd Garrison Division of the Systems Alliance Marines. With overwhelming odds against them, the hopes of Shanxi rest with the fledgling Alliance fleet...and unlikely allies within the ranks of their foes.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Tragedy - Chapters: 45 - Words: 237,786 - Reviews: 646 - Favs: 785 - Follows: 723 - Updated: 2/13/2017 - Published: 7/8/2011 - Complete
Mi'lord not My Lord by CaptainWorsfold reviews
What if Tywin Lannister had figured out who Arya and Gendry were while they were at Harrenhall.
Game of Thrones - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 65,623 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 374 - Follows: 501 - Updated: 2/6/2017 - Published: 1/3/2014 - Gendry W., Arya S.
A Switched Chance by LunaStorm reviews
In which Hermione attempts a time-travelling ritual without due preparation and Harry happily goes along for the ride, and both have to cope with living their best friend's life.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 15 - Words: 123,643 - Reviews: 824 - Favs: 1,732 - Follows: 2,391 - Updated: 1/20/2017 - Published: 1/25/2011 - Harry P., Hermione G.
Contractual Invalidation by R-dude reviews
In which pureblood tradition doesn't always favor the purebloods.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Suspense - Chapters: 7 - Words: 90,127 - Reviews: 1091 - Favs: 7,758 - Follows: 4,457 - Updated: 1/6/2017 - Published: 12/28/2015 - Harry P., Daphne G. - Complete
One Soldier, Two by fringeperson reviews
Evangeline Potter is used to damning the Potter Luck. This time though, she's beginning to see just why no Potter ever went to a Curse Breaker about the issue. Bucky Barnes is certainly not about to start complaining. Fem!Harry/Bucky. Don't own.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Captain America - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 51,950 - Reviews: 1334 - Favs: 6,436 - Follows: 3,881 - Updated: 1/6/2017 - Published: 10/1/2015 - [Harry P., Bucky B./Winter Soldier] - Complete
You Are My Secret by AlexKirko reviews
What if House decided to make an effort and find a way out of his misery after ketamine wore off? Cameron gets wrapped up in his search through a drunken Vegas morning, and both soon discover they are quite different in private compared to the masks they wear at the hospital. DISCONTINUED.
House, M.D. - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 17,293 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 12/10/2016 - Published: 11/24/2016
Storm of Yesterday by ShayaLonnie reviews
Hunted by Voldemort, Hermione and Harry make a last stand in Godric's Hollow. When the Boy-Who-Lived lives no more, Hermione is thrown back in time into another battle where she has a chance to save not only Harry, but another Potter. *Art by colour me luna*
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 68 - Words: 132,606 - Reviews: 7735 - Favs: 9,124 - Follows: 3,862 - Updated: 10/27/2016 - Published: 9/7/2015 - [Hermione G., James P.] Marauders - Complete
Justice, Justice Shall You Pursue by White Squirrel reviews
Goblin courts are inhumane, the Ministry thinks it can arrange marriages, and Voldemort wants to oppress everybody. The muggle government is not amused.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 35,865 - Reviews: 655 - Favs: 2,724 - Follows: 1,946 - Updated: 10/18/2016 - Published: 5/23/2016 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
All kinds of rabbit holes by honeyandvodka reviews
Her favourite author just bought her a drink? Shut. The. Front. Door. What if Castle and Beckett met five years earlier?
Castle - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 36 - Words: 73,959 - Reviews: 847 - Favs: 713 - Follows: 647 - Updated: 9/24/2016 - Published: 12/29/2012 - Rick C., Kate B. - Complete
A Game of Changes by ChoicesUponChoices reviews
All it takes is a moment to send the world we know and all its histories careening off course. Rickard Stark burned alive. Eddard marched from Winterfell, mustering the banners of the North in a march such as the South had never seen. Brandon lived, and Catelyn Tully married a different wolf. Westeros is a very different place when the eldest son of Rickard Stark rules the North.
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 12 - Words: 24,882 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 412 - Follows: 546 - Updated: 7/21/2016 - Published: 10/10/2015 - Catelyn T., Eddard S./Ned, Robert B., Brandon S.
A Sword Cuts A Swordsman by DisobedienceWriter reviews
My ideas file for the Game of Thrones. These are short stories that may or may not become longer pieces. Many are about the consequences of cruelty or other rash acts.
Game of Thrones - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 32,948 - Reviews: 366 - Favs: 1,355 - Follows: 1,092 - Updated: 7/9/2016 - Published: 5/22/2016
A Flayed Man by jsharrypotterfan reviews
A man from America dies to find himself in the body of the newborn Heir to the Dreadfort, Domeric Bolton. He will do anything to change the events he knows are coming, even defy the Leech Lord himself. SelfInsert/Dany Robb/Margaery
Game of Thrones - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,523 - Reviews: 304 - Favs: 2,079 - Follows: 2,405 - Updated: 7/3/2016 - Published: 6/10/2016 - [OC, Daenerys T.] Eddard S., Roose B.
Blackdog by Atlantis Sinatra reviews
After a life of war and adventure, all she wanted to do was live a fairly quiet existence running her little café and avoid inquiries on future children from Mrs. Weasley. She didn't expect Tony Stark to wander his way into her life and decide to never leave. FEM!Harry/Tony Stark
Crossover - Harry Potter & Avengers - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 24,966 - Reviews: 1411 - Favs: 8,196 - Follows: 10,462 - Updated: 6/8/2016 - Published: 7/11/2012 - Harry P., Iron Man/Tony S.
Masked Men And Where to Find Them by tinyrose65 reviews
Harry Potter moved to Hell's Kitchen because she wanted a fresh start: time away from the spotlight, where she could focus on being the best Healer she could be. Trust the unconscious man in her dumpster to go and complicate things. (fem!Harry, AU!)
Crossover - Harry Potter & Daredevil - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 18,965 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 1,071 - Follows: 1,286 - Updated: 6/4/2016 - Published: 11/27/2015 - [Harry P., Matt M.]
Petrification Proliferation by White Squirrel reviews
What would have been the appropriate response to a creature that can kill with a look being set loose in the only magical school in Britain? It would have been a lot more than a pat on the head from Dumbledore and a mug of hot cocoa.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 34,020 - Reviews: 1274 - Favs: 7,791 - Follows: 5,527 - Updated: 5/29/2016 - Published: 5/22/2015 - Harry P., Amelia B. - Complete
From Hell's Heart by gtamaster316 reviews
AU First Contact War. It was 48 years of endless slaughter and death. And from the pain and suffering of such unprecedented conflict, emerged an unprecedented plot, born of hate, to bring it all to an end...
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Tragedy - Chapters: 14 - Words: 75,788 - Reviews: 414 - Favs: 1,004 - Follows: 1,130 - Updated: 5/10/2016 - Published: 2/12/2012 - J. Garson, Garrus V.
Apocalypse Seven Hundred by silversundown reviews
Instead of running into Aaron after Terminus, the group stumbles across Xander and Faith instead. Trust isn't an easy thing to earn in this world, especially when your new acquaintances seem to be hiding something at every turn. Buffy crossover with quite a bit of Caryl.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Walking Dead - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 29,898 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 4/21/2016 - Published: 3/16/2016 - Buffy S., Faith L., Daryl D., Carol - Complete
Hell's Kitchen: A History by tinyrose65 reviews
In between the alien attacks and life-and-death fights, life for the denizens of Hell's Kitchen moves on. Here's what that life looks like (fem!Harry, AU! One-shots from "Masked Men and Where to Find Them").
Crossover - Harry Potter & Daredevil - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 9,309 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 237 - Follows: 349 - Updated: 3/19/2016 - Published: 3/15/2016
Phantom Limb by rbackwards reviews
A young man realizes he's been the victim of a prophecy. He struggles to make sense of his place in an unfamiliar world. Sound familiar? Nothing's familiar to this young man. Nothing except his aunt Arthur. New readers: give this one some time. 9/2021 - believe it or not, a new chapter is forthcoming.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 177,110 - Reviews: 119 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 98 - Updated: 3/14/2016 - Published: 3/14/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W.
The Lawyers Against the Cup by Tangerine-Alert reviews
Harry never put his name in the cup. No one would believe him, so he leaves Hogwarts searching for a way to fight the wizarding contract, using the thing that holds him to it; the law.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 39,258 - Reviews: 660 - Favs: 3,303 - Follows: 1,708 - Updated: 1/17/2016 - Published: 11/29/2015 - Harry P. - Complete
Life in Wartime by sailor8t reviews
What if Buffy went to hell when she jumped into the portal at the end of The Gift? ON HIATUS
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 33,839 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 88 - Updated: 1/11/2016 - Published: 12/26/2009 - Buffy S., Willow R.
Renegade by 1991Kira reviews
They expected him to be a paragon of virtue, a champion of the Light, the personification of all that is good and noble in their world...they were wrong. Explore the legend of a darker Harry Potter, seen from the eyes of friend and foe alike. Multiple POVs. Non-linear narrative. Rated M for violence. (DISCONTINUED)
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Mystery - Chapters: 27 - Words: 186,530 - Reviews: 919 - Favs: 2,193 - Follows: 2,122 - Updated: 12/11/2015 - Published: 6/9/2015 - Harry P.
Aftermath by Blue Leah reviews
Life goes on after the great battle at Hogwarts. Is everything as peaceful as it seems? Covers the missing chapters between the final chapter and epilogue.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 111 - Words: 246,262 - Reviews: 1043 - Favs: 576 - Follows: 565 - Updated: 11/24/2015 - Published: 8/14/2007
Forget Me Not by Sarcasma reviews
After an accident Ginny can't remember. She can't remember her family, her life, or Harry. In the struggle to find her memories, can Harry make her fall in love with him again?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 11 - Words: 51,138 - Reviews: 246 - Favs: 503 - Follows: 209 - Updated: 10/21/2015 - Published: 9/29/2015 - [Harry P., Ginny W.] [Hermione G., Ron W.] - Complete
A Legion for Westeros by High Plains Drifter reviews
While hunting boar in the Kingswood, Robert Baratheon discovers a lost band of Sell Swords who speak a barely recognizable dialect of Free Cities Valyrian. Befriending them, the King, along with Ser Barristan, returns to their camp; only to discover it is a Castra guarded by an entire Roman Legion. When Robert returns to King's Landing with them, will Westeros ever be the same?
A song of Ice and Fire - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 21 - Words: 106,865 - Reviews: 261 - Favs: 866 - Follows: 891 - Updated: 9/18/2015 - Published: 12/10/2013 - Robert B., Barristan S.
Early Retirement by Secondary Luminescence reviews
Ten years into her peaceful life in New York City, Cathryn Potter is found. Willing to do almost anything to stay hidden from the world she left behind after discovering her immortality, she finds herself working alongside god and mortal alike in an effort to protect the world from alien invasion. Fem!Harry, some adult themes, swearing, and mention of suicide. Sequel (part I) up.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Avengers - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 21,073 - Reviews: 175 - Favs: 4,054 - Follows: 1,956 - Updated: 9/16/2015 - Published: 3/18/2014 - Harry P., Captain America/Steve R. - Complete
A Child Avenged by PandasWearGlasses reviews
Harry Potter is a good guy, really, but there are some lines that should never be crossed, and Nick Fury has just crossed them.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Avengers - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,360 - Reviews: 550 - Favs: 10,199 - Follows: 4,218 - Published: 8/4/2015 - Harry P., Teddy L., Nick F. - Complete
Knights Consort by Cyclone reviews
There's more to love than who you're attracted to. In fact, sometimes, that just gets in the way.
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 6,280 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 116 - Updated: 7/23/2015 - Published: 2/25/2014 - [Kennedy, Xander H.]
The Death of Natasha Romanoff by Philosophize reviews
While helping to stop Stane, Natasha encounters a face she never thought she'd see again. Forced to deal with memories, decisions, and a life she thought she'd long left behind, will she survive the emotional upheaval, not to mention the rampaging, homicidal Stane? Or will she have to face her fears & transform herself, becoming once again what she once was? AU; fem!Harry; femslash
Crossover - Harry Potter & Avengers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 6 - Words: 16,738 - Reviews: 174 - Favs: 1,269 - Follows: 942 - Updated: 7/12/2015 - Published: 5/1/2015 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] Black Widow/Natasha R. - Complete
Wrong Place Wrong Time by CheerfulChemist reviews
I had intended this to be a one shot AU, but after some requests, I'm continuing it. What would have happened if Ryan's bullet had found Castle in 301? "Was that what you wanted to tell me, Kate?" Castle asked."Yeah," Beckett confided, "not that it would have changed anything." "It would have changed everything. Kate." The rating has been upped to M for safety chapter 75 and beyond
Castle - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 144 - Words: 222,070 - Reviews: 1685 - Favs: 293 - Follows: 362 - Updated: 5/15/2015 - Published: 12/18/2014 - Rick C., Kate B., Javier E., Kevin R. - Complete
Dark Age of War by BanterHorse reviews
In the aftermath of the Iron War, the 25th Millennium sees the downfall of a united human race as mankind rediscovers it's self destructive nature. Forewarned of the coming of a terrible Age of Strife, the remnants of mankind's unified military and government seek to weather the passage of time in stasis. But when they awaken, they find themselves in a galaxy that knows only war.
Warhammer - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 34,569 - Reviews: 216 - Favs: 336 - Follows: 425 - Updated: 5/12/2015 - Published: 3/18/2014 - Eldar, Inquisition, The Emperor, Rogue Traders
To The Thunder by Menamebephil reviews
Chief Hakoda finds himself in the unenviable position of having to marry off one of his children. No War AU.
Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 27,977 - Reviews: 158 - Favs: 286 - Follows: 334 - Updated: 5/7/2015 - Published: 7/5/2014 - Azula, Sokka, Zuko, Mai
Paved With Good Intentions by greenk reviews
There are two kinds of folks who sit around thinking about how to kill people: psychopaths and mystery writers. He threw away his chance to be the kind that pays better. Very AU.
Castle - Rated: T - English - Drama/Suspense - Chapters: 17 - Words: 32,833 - Reviews: 280 - Favs: 122 - Follows: 287 - Updated: 4/25/2015 - Published: 9/12/2013 - Rick C., Kate B.
Heap Coals of Fire on His Head by White Squirrel reviews
One-shot. After losing the war, being held prisoner by the Death Eaters, seeing her friends' lives ruined, and being sold to the highest bidder, Hermione finally embraces her Slytherin side and finds a way to take control of her life again.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,200 - Reviews: 122 - Favs: 362 - Follows: 126 - Published: 2/26/2015 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
First Day of My Life by Hayley128 reviews
Set two years after Chosen. Faith decided to return to prison after the big battle but thanks to new lawyers Angel provided, her sentence is reduced to two years. Once she's out, where will she go?
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 21 - Words: 82,983 - Reviews: 79 - Favs: 150 - Follows: 161 - Updated: 1/25/2015 - Published: 11/4/2012 - Buffy S., Faith L. - Complete
Heart and Eye by ANARCHY RULES reviews
Heartbroken due to Anya's death, Xander finds himself in LA. While thought to be dead by his friends he forms an uneasy alliance with Angel and his team, he must decide if he has something to live for. Working under Wesley's supervision he attempts to rebuild his life and find a place where he belongs. That would be easy if he didn't have to share a workspace with Harmony Kendall.
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 95 - Words: 267,338 - Reviews: 747 - Favs: 232 - Follows: 210 - Updated: 1/24/2015 - Published: 6/18/2013 - Xander H., Angel, Harmony K., Wesley W. - Complete
Attachment Syndrome by FanficwriterGHC reviews
She has a baby. She brought a baby back from Haiti. Can you even do that? Season 3 AU.
Castle - Rated: M - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 39 - Words: 175,180 - Reviews: 2973 - Favs: 1,347 - Follows: 1,304 - Updated: 1/18/2015 - Published: 7/8/2014 - Rick C., Kate B. - Complete
Storyteller by krynny su reviews
Castle decides to shadow a certain blonde Slayer for his next book. Buffy/Castle
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Castle - Rated: T - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 6 - Words: 24,710 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 81 - Updated: 1/10/2015 - Published: 4/25/2012 - Buffy S., Rick C.
Ascension to Greatness by LeighLand94 reviews
AU marriage contract fic. Everyone dreams of greatness, but not everyone can achieve it. A child who was born great finds a partner in one who wants to achieve it. They come together in an attempt to leave their mark upon the world. Can they do it? Or will the pests in their lives stop them?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 21,609 - Reviews: 168 - Favs: 617 - Follows: 812 - Updated: 12/5/2014 - Published: 12/1/2014 - [Harry P., Daphne G.] Kevin E.
Hail Odysseus by Brennus reviews
After believing that Harry Potter died in a house fire at the age of ten, the Wizarding world is shocked when he emerges, out of the blue, just in time to attend his seventh year at Hogwarts. They're even more shocked when he's Sorted into Slytherin.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 17 - Words: 157,425 - Reviews: 1229 - Favs: 4,355 - Follows: 2,406 - Updated: 11/21/2014 - Published: 8/25/2014 - [Harry P., Ginny W.] - Complete
Another Chance by Captain Cranium reviews
Complete! A cliché time travel story with a twist. After losing his friends and family to the war, Harry travels back in time to his fourteen year old self's body and tries to change the outcome of the Triwizard Tournament.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 36,456 - Reviews: 643 - Favs: 1,421 - Follows: 1,514 - Updated: 11/16/2014 - Published: 1/8/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Returning to the Start by timunderwood9 reviews
Harry killed them once. Now that he is eleven he'll kill them again. Hermione knows her wonderful best friend has a huge secret, but that just means he needs her more. A H/Hr time travel romance where they don't become a couple until Hermione is twenty one, and Harry kills death eaters without the help of children.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 40,170 - Reviews: 692 - Favs: 3,441 - Follows: 1,602 - Updated: 10/31/2014 - Published: 9/12/2014 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] - Complete
Socially Acceptable Options by honeyandvodka reviews
Katherine Beckett had options. Lots of options. Socially acceptable options. So when her mom's murderer was caught, Kate shelved her plans of becoming a cop, intent on living as ordinary a life as possible. But is normal enough? Meeting Richard Castle might be just the thing to change everything for both of them. #CastleFicathon
Castle - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 59,829 - Reviews: 1132 - Favs: 270 - Follows: 392 - Updated: 7/31/2014 - Published: 5/18/2014 - Rick C., Kate B. - Complete
Home Security Service by PaBurke reviews
Aaron Hotchner's choice of Jack's nanny was better than even he knew.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Criminal Minds - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,392 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 528 - Follows: 180 - Published: 6/28/2014 - Buffy S., A. Hotchner/Hotch, Jack H. - Complete
Another Day in Paradise by alefbt1228 reviews
Set in S4, before This Year's Girl, while Faith is in a coma. "Why am I here, in your dream? Why were we kids? Why am I seeing all this?"
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,747 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 7 - Published: 6/3/2014 - Buffy S., Faith L. - Complete
Interstitium by AssaultSloth reviews
Flashbacks, interstitial scenes, and backdoor dealings. A companion to ME2 focusing on characters and worlds, big and small.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 33 - Words: 534,513 - Reviews: 933 - Favs: 1,209 - Follows: 819 - Updated: 4/30/2014 - Published: 2/16/2010 - Shepard, Garrus V., Miranda L., Tali'Zorah - Complete
I Will If You Do by LyraLilyJackson reviews
Because you were never happy where you were, and that one phrase changed your life...over and over again. Andromeda Tonks reflects on love and loss. One-shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,097 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 5 - Published: 3/7/2014 - Andromeda T. - Complete
Reaping the Whirlwind (The Boom Boom Boom Ba Remix) by Lizbeth Marcs reviews
What does the addition of supernatural-related reaps to the reaping workload, Roxy's promotion, the addition of a new grim reaper with supernatural experience, a new sort-of boyfriend who may or may not be a pirate, and an approaching apocalypse all have in common? New grim reaper boss George doesn't know, but she's willing to bet that in the middle of it all the universe will kic
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Dead Like Me - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Supernatural - Chapters: 14 - Words: 82,036 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 1/3/2014 - Published: 1/1/2014 - Xander H., Dawn S., George L., Mason - Complete
And the Meek Shall Inherit the Galaxy by Full-Paragon reviews
Due to a shift in turian and quarian patrols, first contact for humanity is friendly; Rael'Zorah and Hannah Shepard become friends, as do their species. But the galaxy is not a safe place, and schisms develop when the Council steps in. As humanity finds new allies among the stars, something darker stirs. The Meek must beware, for it is nearly harvest time. AU, lots of worldbuilding
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Family - Chapters: 49 - Words: 232,286 - Reviews: 3859 - Favs: 3,935 - Follows: 2,876 - Updated: 11/16/2013 - Published: 3/31/2013 - Tali'Zorah, Shepard, Hannah S., Rael'Zorah - Complete
As Far As Oxnard by Saul Good reviews
Xander meets old friends he's never known. A/N: This is a side project while I work on my main fic. Don't expect regular updates. Added another couple thousand more words 4/7/14
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,484 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 37 - Published: 10/13/2013 - Xander H., Amelia P./Amy, 11th Doctor, Rory W.
Antlers and Fangs by chipmunki reviews
The Lost Prince was stolen during his first year. As son of King Robert and Queen Cersei, he was sorely missed in the realm. However Eddard Stark believes he may have found the prince, in the unlikely form of an amnesiac Harry Potter.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Game of Thrones - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 20,987 - Reviews: 423 - Favs: 1,838 - Follows: 2,504 - Updated: 10/8/2013 - Published: 10/21/2011 - Harry P.
Delenda Est by Lord Silvere reviews
Harry is a prisoner, and Bellatrix has fallen from grace. The accidental activation of Bella's treasured heirloom results in another chance for Harry. It also gives him the opportunity to make the acquaintance of the young and enigmatic Bellatrix Black as they change the course of history.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 46 - Words: 392,449 - Reviews: 8202 - Favs: 18,929 - Follows: 11,341 - Updated: 9/21/2013 - Published: 11/14/2009 - Harry P., Bellatrix L. - Complete
Lost and Found by scripting life reviews
A four-year-old, a mall, and finding something you didn't even know you'd lost. Sometimes all it takes is a chance encounter for everything to fall into place. AU with echoes of canon.
Castle - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 27 - Words: 82,514 - Reviews: 597 - Favs: 501 - Follows: 955 - Updated: 9/14/2013 - Published: 5/4/2012 - Rick C., Kate B., Alexis C.
The Dragon King's Temple by Kryal reviews
The spite of the spirits opened a door better left untouched. On the other hand, with Fire and Earth as one's allies, sometimes escaping is the easy part.
Crossover - Stargate: SG-1 & Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 212,762 - Reviews: 1417 - Favs: 2,880 - Follows: 1,281 - Updated: 9/10/2013 - Published: 12/27/2011 - Complete
Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Arkham Asylum by Joshua The Evil Guy reviews
One-Shot. The asylum Buffy was sent to after burning down her gym, but before going to Sunnydale wasn't just any asylum. No, it had to be the best there was; Arkham Asylum.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Batman - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,034 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 236 - Follows: 163 - Published: 7/9/2013 - Buffy S., Oswald C./Penguin, Killer Croc, Poison Ivy - Complete
women like that don't become mystery writers by FanficwriterGHC reviews
A co-written story by liviafan1 and Fanficwriterghc. A writer's blocked, post-Derrick Storm Castle meets Kate Beckett, a rising young mystery novelist acquired by Black Pawn to replace him. Despite their instant dislike of each other, they are given a month to co-write Black Pawn's next bestseller, or lose their advances, and possibly their jobs.
Castle - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,667 - Reviews: 349 - Favs: 163 - Follows: 471 - Updated: 5/27/2013 - Published: 3/31/2013 - Rick C., Kate B.
Small Talk by Oracle Glass reviews
"She's not a friend, but she's a friend of a friend," Jenny had said. "It'll be fun, Javier, I'm sure it will be." And then Ryan had tossed in a crack about passing the time while Lanie wasn't talking to him, and before he knew it he had agreed to a blind date, which was strictly against the rules, but here he was anyway, in the middle of a meal that was going to break the budget f
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Castle - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,012 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 17 - Published: 5/20/2013 - Buffy S., Javier E. - Complete
First Contact by Animus of Masada reviews
An asari exploration vessel discovers Earth in the 2030's...and the first contact scenario has incredible implications for both species. What does humanity look like through alien eyes? Where do they go from here? /-AU: no Reapers, completely disconnected from the plot of the games, but mostly faithful to the setting. Told from many points of view.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 16 - Words: 51,333 - Reviews: 1402 - Favs: 3,300 - Follows: 3,302 - Updated: 4/10/2013 - Published: 8/12/2011
The Unbreakable Vow by Ash Darklighter reviews
Strange lights are seen across a deserted country lane. The wizarding world is calling him home.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 37 - Words: 264,559 - Reviews: 1790 - Favs: 2,128 - Follows: 2,263 - Updated: 2/24/2013 - Published: 8/5/2007 - Harry P., Ginny W.
Hiding in Plain Sight by Clell65619 reviews
The summer prior to 6th year Harry deals with Tom in a decisive, if accidental manner. That summer Harry gets a girl friend in Susan Bones, and sets about some self improvement. It is after this change to himself he discovers something a bit disturbing about the Wizarding World, something that Hermione Granger is determined to use to her advantage.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,665 - Reviews: 651 - Favs: 5,691 - Follows: 1,814 - Published: 1/23/2013 - Harry P., Susan B. - Complete
The Accidental Bond by kb0 reviews
Harry finds that his "saving people thing" is a power of its own, capable of bonding single witches to him if their life is in mortal danger, with unusual results. H/multi
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 33 - Words: 415,017 - Reviews: 4571 - Favs: 9,328 - Follows: 6,502 - Updated: 1/16/2013 - Published: 12/23/2009 - Harry P. - Complete
The Consequences Of Not Being Polite by The Sidhe reviews
The Colonials finally encounter their long lost relatives. However, they find out that their cousins are not quite what they had expected. Now AU due to progression in the recent season.
Battlestar Galactica: 2003 - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 47 - Words: 266,212 - Reviews: 812 - Favs: 1,390 - Follows: 1,029 - Updated: 12/17/2012 - Published: 10/12/2006 - Complete
The Final Straw by Vlad-the-Impish reviews
A terrible incident becomes 'The straw that broke the camel's back' and leads Xander to take off the kid gloves and ensure that everyone remembers that there are consequences to people's actions.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & NCIS - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,558 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 377 - Follows: 141 - Published: 11/15/2012 - Xander H. - Complete
Good For You by FanficwriterGHC reviews
When the Dragon is slain, there's just a life to be lived. And sometimes there's more to learn in peace than in war. Complete. Separate epilogue pending.
Castle - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 45 - Words: 176,369 - Reviews: 1789 - Favs: 728 - Follows: 655 - Updated: 11/4/2012 - Published: 3/4/2012 - Rick C., Kate B. - Complete
Different Strokes for Different Folks by Publicola reviews
Harry Potter shows up in the middle of the Council of Elrond, and shows them why all magic is equal, but some magics are more equal than others. Brace yourself: it's a Harry Potter/Lord of the Rings crossover kinda-sorta crack!fic one-shot.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,645 - Reviews: 192 - Favs: 1,271 - Follows: 362 - Published: 8/16/2012 - Harry P. - Complete
Children of Prophecies by jennyelf reviews
AU- The generation of children born during the war with Voldemort had more than one prophecy made about them. How will the prophecies change things as we know it? This story will cover from Ginny's birth to Harry's arrival at Hogwarts.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 53 - Words: 101,526 - Reviews: 660 - Favs: 387 - Follows: 473 - Updated: 6/28/2012 - Published: 7/8/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W.
Paint the Town Red by Le'letha reviews
To solve the murder of a young woman, Beckett and Castle take their case into an underworld of Slayers and the supernatural. …Looks like Buffy is visiting the Big Apple after all. COMPLETE
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Castle - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Supernatural - Chapters: 12 - Words: 79,859 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 5/31/2012 - Published: 12/26/2011 - Complete
Martian Manhunter by Mediancat reviews
Veronica Mars ends up in the Buffyverse, knowing what's coming and unable to do anything about it. Or so she thinks . . .
Veronica Mars - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 98 - Words: 262,362 - Reviews: 1071 - Favs: 437 - Follows: 263 - Updated: 5/8/2012 - Published: 2/27/2007 - Veronica - Complete
Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by ifonly13 reviews
Kate Beckett was twenty-six when the biggest accident in her life occurred. Five years later, the biggest miracle happens. AU.
Castle - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 50 - Words: 136,852 - Reviews: 1164 - Favs: 1,009 - Follows: 653 - Updated: 3/20/2012 - Published: 12/30/2011 - Kate B., Rick C. - Complete
A Good Bluff by Chunk127 reviews
A crackfic inspired by mmooch's 'Not Your Typical Wins' series. Spike defeats Glory without even trying to.
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,172 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 21 - Published: 2/27/2012 - Spike, Glory, Buffy S. - Complete
Ice Princess by Luan Mao reviews
Building a romance from a fanon cliche turned on its head.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 15,488 - Reviews: 385 - Favs: 3,032 - Follows: 968 - Updated: 2/19/2012 - Published: 4/2/2010 - Harry P., Daphne G. - Complete
Absolute Loyalty by Rex Tims reviews
Harry, shunned as a Parselmouth, stumbles across a broken Luna locked in a cupboard. Through helping her, he begins something much more than a friendship that develops over the years. Something so much more.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Suspense/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 11,645 - Reviews: 289 - Favs: 1,162 - Follows: 1,462 - Updated: 1/12/2012 - Published: 6/11/2011 - Harry P., Luna L.
Triwizard Tales by Clell65619 reviews
- At 14, Harry Potter really wasn't prepared for the Triwizard Tournament, but if he was forced to compete he was going to do his very best.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 38,772 - Reviews: 1735 - Favs: 8,694 - Follows: 3,339 - Updated: 1/11/2012 - Published: 11/29/2011 - Harry P., Susan B. - Complete
Of Finding Innocence by FanficwriterGHC reviews
When Kate Beckett went to get her book signed by Richard Castle, she never imagined that she'd end up meeting his daughter, much less offering to babysit for the afternoon. AU.
Castle - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 41 - Words: 330,428 - Reviews: 5479 - Favs: 3,817 - Follows: 1,780 - Updated: 11/12/2011 - Published: 7/13/2011 - Kate B., Rick C. - Complete
The AAU of OFI by FanficwriterGHC reviews
SPOILERS FOR "OF FINDING INNOCENCE." This is an alternate take on the events as they could have happened post chapter 30 of "Of Finding Innocence." A different sort of family emerges, and Kate has to learn to live with the past and present.
Castle - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,821 - Reviews: 179 - Favs: 123 - Follows: 143 - Updated: 10/12/2011 - Published: 10/9/2011 - Kate B., Alexis C.
Inherited Traits by chezchuckles reviews
Alexis, after her rejection from Stanford, decides she needs to do more with her life than pad her transcript. Beckett and Castle help her organize a blood drive. ...kudos to Vandi for the twist in this story... COMPLETE at 2
Castle - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,873 - Reviews: 197 - Favs: 286 - Follows: 113 - Updated: 10/10/2011 - Published: 10/9/2011 - Kate B., Rick C. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Ministry of Magic by the madcap magician reviews
At the end of his sixth year at Hogwarts, Harry's life is in turmoil, Dumbledore is dead, Voldemort's power is growing, and those with the power to help him cannot be trusted. Dark times lie ahead, but allies can be found in some of the strangest places!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 26 - Words: 478,171 - Reviews: 238 - Favs: 327 - Follows: 354 - Updated: 9/18/2011 - Published: 7/30/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W.
Legend by ShayneT reviews
Trapped by an alien collector, Lieutenant Commander Data discovers an early 21st century android excavated from the ruins of Sunnydale and a capsule containing the frozen body of one of the Eugenic wars most notorious figures...Buffy Summers.
Crossover - StarTrek: The Next Generation & Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 47 - Words: 103,194 - Reviews: 310 - Favs: 926 - Follows: 442 - Updated: 9/14/2011 - Published: 6/12/2011 - Data, Buffy S. - Complete
A Thin Veneer supplements by AlbertG reviews
Part of A Thin Veneer story series the first generation. We present the background stories that we haven't presented in ATV. These series of stories will detail back plots not addressed in the main story. Please enjoy.
TV X-overs - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 92,165 - Reviews: 177 - Favs: 184 - Follows: 170 - Updated: 9/4/2011 - Published: 11/17/2006
Harry Potter and the Chance Meeting by Clell65619 reviews
After the fall of Voldemort, some people could deal with what they had to do in the War, others could not. Harry had pretty much left Wizarding Britain, thought not magic. Having a quiet drink in a pub, someone from his past re-enters his life HP/TD/DG
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Family - Chapters: 6 - Words: 27,698 - Reviews: 652 - Favs: 3,728 - Follows: 3,228 - Updated: 8/14/2011 - Published: 8/30/2008 - Harry P., Tracey D.
Incendiary by rshakey reviews
Still grieving the loss of his godfather, Harry Potter dreads confronting a Boggart in DA. The shocking new form it takes fuels a fire that will utterly consume those caught in its flames. One thing is for certain - his sixth year will be incendiary...
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,765 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 84 - Published: 8/3/2011 - Harry P., Ginny W.
You shall be queen, dilly dilly by silverbirch reviews
Lavender Brown decided to fall in love and the cards showed her the way. Much to everyone's amazement she followed their advice. Now all she has to do is make the path shown to her work. With Ron Weasley.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,306 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 7/26/2011 - Published: 5/2/2011 - Lavender B., Ron W. - Complete
Dumbledore's Biggest Mistake by Harry-Ginny1234 reviews
A second prophecy made, unfortunately Dumbledore & Harry learn of it too late. Harry must go back in time & fix the oversight. Will that be the only thing he fixes? characters will be progressively OOC Rated for character death, violence, and adult theme
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 81,166 - Reviews: 125 - Favs: 234 - Follows: 315 - Updated: 4/11/2011 - Published: 11/3/2007 - Harry P., Ginny W.
Red In Tooth And Claw by JA Baker reviews
When the crew of Galactica encounters the remains of the Forward Unto Dawn, life starts to get a lot more complicated for all involved, including an old enemy...
Crossover - Halo & Battlestar Galactica: 2003 - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 60 - Words: 139,295 - Reviews: 1605 - Favs: 1,419 - Follows: 1,064 - Updated: 3/13/2011 - Published: 2/12/2008 - [Master Chief/John-117, Cortana] - Complete
Unexpected Encounters by Corey Lin reviews
Five years after the defeat of Voldemort, a chance encounter on a London street opens new possibilities for friendship and shows just how much one man can change. Written after HBP and is not DH compliant. Now completed!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 6 - Words: 21,965 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 390 - Follows: 116 - Updated: 11/29/2010 - Published: 1/8/2010 - Dudley D., Harry P. - Complete
Bittersweet Victory by imPERFECTology reviews
One Shot: 'He hadn't been worthy of a single ounce of her love, he who had ignored and desecrated her.' When Harry Potter first received Slytherin Ice Queen Ginevra Weasley's diary, he was in for the shock of his life. AU after first year.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,584 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 76 - Follows: 18 - Published: 11/23/2010 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Well, That Went Well by emw314 reviews
Xander and Faith are tasked with keeping Dawn safe from Glory, but of course things go wrong, and they're stuck out of time and place.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Firefly - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 22,380 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 244 - Follows: 71 - Updated: 10/30/2010 - Published: 10/22/2010 - Xander H. - Complete
The Strange Disappearance of SallyAnne Perks by Paimpont reviews
Harry recalls that a pale little girl called Sally-Anne was sorted into Hufflepuff during his first year, but no one else remembers her. Was there really a Sally-Anne? Harry and Hermione set out to solve the chilling mystery of the lost Hogwarts student.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Suspense - Chapters: 11 - Words: 36,835 - Reviews: 2036 - Favs: 6,039 - Follows: 1,971 - Updated: 10/8/2010 - Published: 8/16/2010 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Blood Under the Bridge by Lucinda reviews
A different reaction to the miserable summer after the Third Task, and Umbridge. One-shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,319 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 164 - Follows: 74 - Published: 10/7/2010 - Harry P.
The Board by Clell65619 reviews
Following the fall of Voldemort, the Hogwarts Board of Governors meet.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,312 - Reviews: 370 - Favs: 2,628 - Follows: 668 - Published: 9/15/2010 - Complete
Tragedy, Mine Alone by joe6991 reviews
Twenty years after the end of the Dark War and the world has changed. There is no such thing as a hero, and if there was, Harry Potter certainly would not be one. A dark accounting is forged in the truth and tragedy buried amidst the ruins of ascension.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,303 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 214 - Follows: 93 - Published: 8/14/2010 - Harry P., Voldemort
The First Day by little0bird reviews
The first year after the battle.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 55 - Words: 251,033 - Reviews: 3716 - Favs: 4,273 - Follows: 1,981 - Updated: 8/11/2010 - Published: 7/2/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Name the Stars by Gilari reviews
Mal's not sure about the strange new passager that signs on with Serenity. What with his bleached blond hair and his leather coat that looks like it belongs in a museum, Mal is a mite suspicious.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Firefly - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,763 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 175 - Follows: 88 - Published: 7/31/2010 - Spike, River
To Live in Azkaban by PadfootObsessed329 reviews
In their will, James and Lily Potter stated that under no circumstances was their son to be removed from his Godfather’s care. Now with Sirius Black in Azkaban, Albus Dumbledore has a problem. Will he really have to allow Harry Potter to live in Azkaban?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 20,805 - Reviews: 335 - Favs: 463 - Follows: 648 - Updated: 7/23/2010 - Published: 11/23/2005 - Sirius B., Harry P.
Learning to Breathe by onoM reviews
Harry Potter is 16 years old. He already defeated Voldemort, with the help of his Godfather Sirius Black. Now he is in for the biggest challenge of his life: attending Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 151,978 - Reviews: 3584 - Favs: 4,859 - Follows: 4,088 - Updated: 7/19/2010 - Published: 8/31/2005 - Harry P., Ginny W.
Harry Potter and The Trust by Meandering Fox reviews
Harry goes to sleep at 31, but wakes up on his 10th birthday in the cupboard under the stairs. Voldemort is still alive, as are many others. Can Harry end the second war before it starts? DH compliant, mostly. Bill, Remus, Dumbledore, and many more...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 19 - Words: 108,462 - Reviews: 1565 - Favs: 2,795 - Follows: 3,230 - Updated: 7/16/2010 - Published: 12/23/2007 - Harry P., Albus D.
Harry Potter: Dark Memories by Blueowl reviews
Voldemort didn't just give Harry some of his powers that night. He gave him all of his memories. With them, his allies and friends, Harry shall change the Wizarding World like no one ever before. LightHarry. GoodDumbledore. Chaotic magic. COMPLETE!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 57 - Words: 301,128 - Reviews: 5295 - Favs: 11,479 - Follows: 5,570 - Updated: 7/14/2010 - Published: 7/13/2007 - Harry P. - Complete
The Conversation by Clell65619 reviews
Harry and Tom Riddle sit down to discuss a few things.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,321 - Reviews: 126 - Favs: 1,119 - Follows: 313 - Published: 3/22/2010 - Harry P., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
The Forever Mage by Darth Marrs reviews
Harry Potter/ST:NG era post movies crossover. A young man with messy hair and green eyes finds himself in the middle of 24th Century Scotland with no memories. Join him as he tries to solve not only who he is, but where his people are.
Crossover - StarTrek: The Next Generation & Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 24 - Words: 102,957 - Reviews: 1537 - Favs: 3,033 - Follows: 1,419 - Updated: 3/13/2010 - Published: 9/26/2009 - Harry P. - Complete
Expectations by Potterworm reviews
People often become who others expect them to be. When Harry was sorted into Slytherin, he realized he was alone, friendless, and apparently meant to be evil.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,981 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 782 - Follows: 213 - Published: 3/6/2010 - Complete
Too Late by Lucillia reviews
Lily and James Potter come out of hiding so their son Alexander could fulfill the prophesy and defeat Voldemort. Things don't go as planned though, as they returned to the Wizarding World in 1999.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,597 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 1,754 - Follows: 701 - Published: 3/1/2010 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
Contemplating Clouds by reviews
Apathetic Occlumency teacher twisting your mind out of shape? Never fear, there's a charming young girl in the year below to twist it back in the opposite direction. Just hope it doesn't snap.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,222 - Reviews: 555 - Favs: 2,234 - Follows: 2,258 - Updated: 1/5/2010 - Published: 10/28/2007 - Harry P., Luna L.
Path of Decision by lulu42 reviews
Voldemort is in power, but the Wizarding World fights back. Harry Potter, Master of Death, is faced with a choice, move forward or change everything? Warning: This story is weird and not for everyone.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Sandman - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 60 - Words: 244,647 - Reviews: 1633 - Favs: 2,665 - Follows: 1,498 - Updated: 12/7/2009 - Published: 7/31/2008 - Harry P. - Complete
And Seven Times Never Kill Man by Marcus Rowland reviews
Lord Voldemort insists that wizards are a race apart from mere muggles. Not his best idea... BtVS and Harry Potter crossover, no major spoilers, character death.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 880 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 16 - Published: 7/23/2009 - Voldemort - Complete
The Lie I've Lived by jbern reviews
Not all of James died that night. Not all of Harry lived. The Triwizard Tournament as it should have been and a hero discovering who he really wants to be.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 234,571 - Reviews: 5045 - Favs: 14,656 - Follows: 6,965 - Updated: 5/28/2009 - Published: 2/9/2007 - Harry P., Fleur D. - Complete
Accidental Hero (aka, The Absentminded Ravenclaw) by lecturience reviews
ABANDONED. Freaky connections aside, does anyone else think it strange that Harry survived a Killing Curse with little more damage than a scar? Well, what if he hadn't come through so unscathed? And what if the other damage was more mental than physical?
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,341 - Reviews: 683 - Favs: 2,210 - Follows: 2,154 - Updated: 5/16/2009 - Published: 11/21/2008 - [Harry P., Luna L.]
Matchmaker by Aggiebell reviews
Sometimes a relationship needs a little something extra, the right direction. Luckily for Harry and Ginny, there's someone up to the task.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,941 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 139 - Follows: 14 - Published: 4/24/2009 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Going Native by Rap541 reviews
GalacticaStar Trek Next Generation. What do you do when you're a lost Starfleet officer in the Beta Quadrant? You blend in and hope for the best.
Battlestar Galactica: 2003 - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 67 - Words: 156,591 - Reviews: 1407 - Favs: 1,156 - Follows: 678 - Updated: 3/22/2009 - Published: 2/16/2007 - Gaeta
Lament by poe1911 reviews
What happens after "Happily Ever After?"
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,656 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 2/14/2009 - Published: 1/25/2009 - Xander H., Buffy S. - Complete
A Different Fate by lordhellebore reviews
AU: JKR portrays Harry as completely unaffected by trhe Killing Curse cast at him, but how would things have gone if it had been different? Drabble series, five drabbles per chapter.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Angst - Chapters: 13 - Words: 7,025 - Reviews: 815 - Favs: 2,487 - Follows: 541 - Updated: 12/27/2008 - Published: 3/5/2008 - [Petunia D., Remus L.] Harry P., Dudley D. - Complete
Once More by Conscience15 reviews
After years of fighting in the War, Harry realizes that Voldemort has won. In a desperate gamble for one more chance, he goes back in time to try to get things right. He soon finds himself training in the Auror Academy with more than one familiar face. AU
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 40,487 - Reviews: 320 - Favs: 621 - Follows: 920 - Updated: 12/9/2008 - Published: 11/22/2007 - Harry P., N. Tonks
End Of the Line by shewhoguards reviews
Hell was, Snape decided, a crowded railway platform.Post Deathly Hallows. Contains spoilers.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Discworld - Rated: T - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 30,933 - Reviews: 855 - Favs: 2,620 - Follows: 745 - Updated: 10/31/2008 - Published: 7/22/2007 - Severus S. - Complete
Learning to Live Again by seeker68 reviews
Starts the morning after the Final Battle. Follow along as Harry and Ginny live through the next few years and learn how to deal with the after-effects of the war, and try to live the life they deserve. Main focus is H/G but lots of other characters
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 39 - Words: 246,339 - Reviews: 558 - Favs: 489 - Follows: 290 - Updated: 10/27/2008 - Published: 4/23/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W.
Harry Potter and the Marriage Contracts by Clell65619 reviews
The War is Over, Harry has won. But at what cost? At odds with Dumbledore, estranged from the Weasleys, betrayed by Lupin, Harry tries to carry on for his 7th year. Harry/Daphne. There will be Humor, there will be Romance, also Drama and Angst.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 14 - Words: 73,198 - Reviews: 2341 - Favs: 9,285 - Follows: 3,944 - Updated: 10/24/2008 - Published: 2/17/2008 - Harry P., Daphne G. - Complete
Worlds Collide by rumpelsnorcack reviews
Two Harrys simultaneously discover a passage between their worlds. What happens when a harmony Harry meets his counterpart in canonland? Despite what this first part looks like, this really is a Harry/Ginny story. Promise. *Now complete!*
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 10,886 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 10/21/2008 - Published: 10/14/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Second time love by broomstick flyer reviews
Hermione makes a potion that will take her back in time to put right the mistakes she made, the worst of which was marrying the wrong man. Why she married Ron she did not know, she did know it was the biggest mistake she ever made.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 34,148 - Reviews: 622 - Favs: 2,246 - Follows: 942 - Updated: 9/30/2008 - Published: 9/22/2008 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
The Decline of the Blacks by Hahukum Konn reviews
Arcturus Black watches the Most Noble and Ancient Black family's decline in the last years of his life as he tries and fails to obtain justice for Sirius Black.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,753 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 8/30/2008 - Published: 8/26/2008 - Complete
Mick's cafe by silverbirch reviews
She left. One day she just wasn't there anymore. They knew she was still alive, she still wrote letters to her parents. Why had she gone? A little plot bunny that popped up and waved to me. Should be more than a one-shot. JK Rowling still owns it.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,181 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 8/30/2008 - Published: 8/24/2008 - Complete
Burning Down the House by little0bird reviews
Some things come easily for some people. Then, there's Ron and Hermione.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 21 - Words: 74,070 - Reviews: 654 - Favs: 434 - Follows: 179 - Updated: 7/12/2008 - Published: 1/7/2008 - Ron W., Hermione G. - Complete
Wish Carefully by Ten Toes reviews
REVISED. one-shot told by Lucius Malfoy. What might happen if the Death Eaters got what they wished for…
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,964 - Reviews: 443 - Favs: 4,112 - Follows: 1,072 - Published: 6/28/2008 - Lucius M. - Complete
The Wise One: Book One: Becoming by FarenMaddox reviews
When Sirius Black escapes Azkaban and 8-year-old Harry Potter disappears, the world is thrown into upheaval. What will Britain and Harry be without each other, and who will face the Dark? You only THINK you've read this before. I guarantee you haven't.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 25 - Words: 99,300 - Reviews: 1477 - Favs: 3,495 - Follows: 1,762 - Updated: 6/28/2008 - Published: 2/9/2008 - Harry P., Sirius B. - Complete
In the Words of Ginevra Molly Potter by thejealousone reviews
The Autobiography of Ginny Weasley. Her point of view from book one to book seven and beyond, complete with missing moments and everything. Over 800 reviews and nearly 130,000 hits! Written before December 1, 2007. Last Updated August 16, 2008.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 206,370 - Reviews: 1105 - Favs: 1,756 - Follows: 474 - Updated: 4/25/2008 - Published: 8/16/2007 - Ginny W., Harry P. - Complete
A Treasure Hunt by RAB01 reviews
Ginny finally gets what she has always wanted. After she makes the wonderful new discovery, she gives her husband Harry a treasure hunt to inform him of her discovery. One-Shot. Ginny/Harry.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,491 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 5 - Published: 4/14/2008 - Ginny W., Harry P. - Complete
Tree Houses and Daisies by little0bird reviews
Ron and Hermione in the weeks after they return to the Burrow.DH spoilers...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 46,621 - Reviews: 615 - Favs: 609 - Follows: 232 - Updated: 4/10/2008 - Published: 12/29/2007 - Hermione G., Ron W. - Complete
A Hero by Celebony reviews
Dudley begins to see his family in a different light. Warning: strong language and themes of child abuse. WINNER: Best One-Shot at Quibbler Awards
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 18,108 - Reviews: 1580 - Favs: 9,678 - Follows: 1,633 - Published: 4/2/2008 - Dudley D., Harry P. - Complete
Leaky Pipes and Pygmy Puffs by Casca reviews
It's ten years after the defeat of Voldemort and Harry Potter has been named head of the Auror Department. A past file from the Second War finds its way onto his desk and causes him to remember darker times. Written Post-DH.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,137 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 204 - Follows: 25 - Published: 4/2/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Ron and Hermione: A Life Lived by silverbirch reviews
Follow Ron and Hermione through their lives, starting after the defeat of Voldemort. There will be good times and bad. Highs and Lows. Life, really.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 26 - Words: 66,089 - Reviews: 186 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 3/25/2008 - Published: 2/22/2008 - Ron W., Hermione G. - Complete
Fangs and Thanks by dogstar-ebony reviews
What exactly happened when Ron and Hermione disappeared in Deathly Hallows to destroy the Horcrux? Missing moment DH, RR.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,470 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/12/2008 - Hermione G., Ron W. - Complete
As Simple as That by KaryInTheSky reviews
Outside: rain falls passively, pleasing its free will. Inside: Ron struggles once again trying to find the perfect way to ask a rather important question to a rather important person. A R/Hr Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,604 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 5 - Published: 3/2/2008 - Ron W., Hermione G. - Complete
My daughter, my story by silverbirch reviews
You know her as one of the Golden Trio. I know her as Hermione, my daugher. I am John Granger, and this is my story. JKR owns, I borrow. This is about a teenage girl growing up, hence the rating. Reviews are very welcome.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 9 - Words: 20,663 - Reviews: 110 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 2/2/2008 - Published: 1/19/2008 - Hermione G. - Complete
Worth it by Redgirl7 reviews
A one-shot about Neville Longbottom, the way I think he got his Hogwarts letter. It's a short one, so please read. This is my first story and if you'll review I can improve.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 642 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Published: 1/30/2008 - Neville L. - Complete
Silence in the Hallway by Tom Kristal reviews
Harry and Ginny return late at night to the Burrow after an eventful evening. H/G
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,274 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 189 - Follows: 40 - Published: 1/25/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Firewhisky Advice by little0bird reviews
Things are about to change for our intrepid hero! Takes place a few months after Snitches, Bubbles, and Pizza.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 30,955 - Reviews: 247 - Favs: 428 - Follows: 110 - Updated: 1/12/2008 - Published: 12/20/2007 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
He Realised by Amaherst reviews
A 200 word drabble. HarryxGinny. Not what you think it may be. Read & Review.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 219 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/30/2007 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Magical Contracts by Kalen Darkmoon reviews
In Goblet of Fire, JKR established that it was absurdly easy to bind other witches and wizards unwillingly into binding magical contracts with a simple, school-taught 'confundus' charm. What if Harry took note of that and decided to do something about it?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,285 - Reviews: 511 - Favs: 4,538 - Follows: 1,303 - Published: 12/12/2007 - Harry P. - Complete
Are We There Yet? by Livi2Jack reviews
Battlestar Galactica meets Stargate Atlantis,while Jack O’Neill is in command. How would the first contact work out? What is the secret Galactica doesn't know? The best laid plans oft go astray.Feedback please.
Stargate: SG-1 - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 17 - Words: 89,264 - Reviews: 274 - Favs: 244 - Follows: 305 - Updated: 11/18/2007 - Published: 9/16/2006 - J. O'Neill, C. Mitchell
A Friend Indeed by kb0 reviews
During Harry's fourth year, what if Ginny had asked Harry how he was feeling when her brother turned his back on Harry? What if she had tried to befriend him then? How would that have affected Harry and his other friends? To cover Harry's fourth year.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 69,821 - Reviews: 353 - Favs: 1,912 - Follows: 583 - Updated: 10/30/2007 - Published: 10/6/2007 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Surrogate by Sovran reviews
Sometimes, the person you need finds you.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,678 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/10/2007 - George W., Angelina J. - Complete
Encounter At Dawn by JA Baker reviews
As First Contact situations go, it could have gone better. But with the threat of the Wraith hanging over them the Colonials, Cylons and Tau'ri are just going to have to find a way to get along... Battlestar Galactica RDM Stargate Atlantis
Crossover - Stargate: Atlantis & Battlestar Galactica: 2003 - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 35 - Words: 77,364 - Reviews: 722 - Favs: 565 - Follows: 369 - Updated: 10/9/2007 - Published: 3/14/2007 - John S., K. Thrace/Starbuck - Complete
Faoi Dheireadh by batsojopo reviews
The survivors of the Holocaust have finally reached Earth, but they find out that's not the end of their problems. Now Completed!
Battlestar Galactica: 2003 - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 67 - Words: 217,837 - Reviews: 280 - Favs: 173 - Follows: 147 - Updated: 9/20/2007 - Published: 1/29/2006 - W. Adama, Gaeta - Complete
Spy Game by neoolong reviews
Away for a year, Xander comes into his own. And finds out just what it takes to save the world when the forces of evil come knocking.
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 66 - Words: 310,434 - Reviews: 268 - Favs: 270 - Follows: 187 - Updated: 9/11/2007 - Published: 2/7/2007 - Xander H., Vi - Complete
A Very Big Weapon by imjustaguy reviews
BSGBabylon 5 – Brother Cavil and the Cylons encounter two travelers while searching for Earth.
Crossover - Babylon 5 & Battlestar Galactica: 2003 - Rated: K+ - English - Horror/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 805 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 27 - Published: 8/26/2007 - L. Alexander, J. Cavil - Complete
Derelict: A Stargate nBSG crossover by Crazy-88 reviews
Waiting for eons in an unclaimed Star System of the Milky Way Galaxy, one of the last great inventions of the Ancients will show the way home for one people and bring two Galaxies into an all out war…
TV X-overs - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 106,024 - Reviews: 228 - Favs: 465 - Follows: 504 - Updated: 6/18/2007 - Published: 11/2/2005
Whoever Fights Monsters by Mediancat reviews
In a dream, Faith tries to stop Buffy from walking down a dangerous path.
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,270 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 5 - Published: 9/29/2006 - Buffy S., Faith L. - Complete
Forgive If Not Forget by fembuck reviews
After a confrontation Buffy and Faith are forced to deal with the issues between and reach a new understanding of each other and their relationship. BuffyFaith, femslash
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 27,633 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 186 - Follows: 46 - Published: 7/1/2006 - Buffy S., Faith L. - Complete
Overlap Job Interview by imjustaguy reviews
BtVSSG1 Colonel Jack O'Neill interviews a new recruit for the SGC. Oneshot.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Stargate: SG-1 - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,868 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 110 - Follows: 43 - Published: 3/14/2006 - Riley F., J. O'Neill - Complete
Countdown by Fair-Ithil reviews
Once there was a girl and somewhere there was a boy... HarryGinny
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,608 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/20/2005 - Ginny W., Harry P.
Sometimes by imjustaguy reviews
BtVSLas Vegas Ed Deline's thoughts as he watches a unique group of guests enter the casino OneShot Complete
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Las Vegas - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,298 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 15 - Published: 11/8/2005 - Complete
Greatest Treason by Kickaha reviews
...the greatest treason: To do the right deed for the wrong reason.' Right actions are taken, for the darkest of reasons.
Buffy X-overs - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,165 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 25 - Published: 7/11/2005
Cuckoo in the Nest by Lizbeth Marcs reviews
Tony Harris always knew there was something off about the kid. From the day he was born, he and Jessica never had anything but bad luck. COMPLETE.
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: M - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 2 - Words: 22,412 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 118 - Follows: 20 - Published: 5/4/2005 - Xander H., Xander H. - Complete
Just a Face On a Train by katheryne reviews
After rescuing a train from Doc Ock's attack, Peter Parker found himself unmasked and indebted to those he had just saved. 4 months later, a train passenger again crosses paths with the young hero. Based on events from SpiderMan 2. Author's update, April 2016 : I'm on Archive Of Our Own now. Search for "katherynefromphilly". You'll find me. :)
Spider-Man - Rated: K - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 5 - Words: 11,504 - Reviews: 646 - Favs: 3,983 - Follows: 833 - Updated: 3/24/2005 - Published: 10/13/2004 - Complete
Bourne No More by Sheilynn reviews
FFA 761…BuffyJason Bourne. You can't run forever.
Buffy X-overs - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,580 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 11 - Published: 12/21/2004 - Complete
Not All Monsters are Demons by imjustaguy reviews
BtVSL&O:SVU A serial killer attacts the attention of both the SVU and the Council. The Summers sisters learn that not all monsters are demons. COMPLETE
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Law and Order: SVU - Rated: T - English - Drama/Mystery - Chapters: 18 - Words: 26,031 - Reviews: 203 - Favs: 275 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 9/19/2004 - Published: 9/3/2004 - Complete
I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends by Haley J. The Bat reviews
Harry keeps getting a funny feeling deep inside around none other than Ginny Weasley. He tries to figure out what to do about it while becoming close with the youngest Weasley. He learns that he's not the only one quietly suffering from Voldemort's hand.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 13,080 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 9 - Published: 8/10/2002 - Harry P., Ginny W.
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Ship of the Line: Far Traveler reviews
My response to Zaion's Ship of the Line challenge on Twisting the Hellmouth. The Scoobies wake up after Halloween to find themselves in orbit, at the controls of a powerful warship from a thousand years in the future. How will their new circumstances affect a 21st Century Earth that is already embroiled in a secret interstellar war? Rated M for mature language and situations.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Stargate: SG-1 - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 48,824 - Reviews: 151 - Favs: 593 - Follows: 798 - Updated: 2/2 - Published: 6/28/2020 - Xander H.
Origin Story reviews
Halloween ends, and Xander finds himself in a place he never thought was real, under circumstances he never saw coming.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Avengers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 33 - Words: 281,822 - Reviews: 1848 - Favs: 2,953 - Follows: 3,030 - Updated: 6/21/2021 - Published: 10/28/2013 - Complete
There's Always a Bigger Fish reviews
While retrieving an intel source, the Agents of SHIELD discover that they aren't necessarily the biggest fish in the pond.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,521 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 155 - Follows: 135 - Updated: 4/25/2021 - Published: 12/9/2016 - Complete
At This Moment reviews
In the aftermath of Graduation Day, Xander discovers that more depends upon him than he thought. A crossover with L.A. Law and Angel.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Angel - Rated: M - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 14,396 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 239 - Follows: 277 - Updated: 10/15/2015 - Published: 9/28/2014 - Xander H., Faith L.
Vintage Season reviews
After everyone dies in the final battle against the First Evil and its aftermath, Dawn Summers makes a deal with D'Hoffryn, granting her wish for a new chance at putting things right, and perhaps saving the lives of her family and friends in the process. Rated M for language use and later scenes of a sexual nature.
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 71,933 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 231 - Follows: 267 - Updated: 12/23/2014 - Published: 7/28/2014
Assumptions and the Word All reviews
The Scoobies get a lesson in unintended consequences.
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,890 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 6/11/2014 - Published: 5/1/2014 - Xander H. - Complete
Jumping On The Bandwagon reviews
After reading dozens of these silly things, I felt the uncontrollable urge to do one myself. Yeah, I know everyone's doing them. So what... they're fun.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 24 - Words: 9,667 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 157 - Follows: 87 - Updated: 8/15/2011 - Published: 2/27/2008
Furious Angels reviews
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks within his bending sickle's compass come. Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks, but bears it out, even to the edge of doom.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 105,311 - Reviews: 645 - Favs: 788 - Follows: 594 - Updated: 9/28/2009 - Published: 4/4/2008 - Ginny W., Harry P. - Complete
Our Obligations reviews
The sins of the father are often visited upon the son. But does the son have to blindly accept the weight of their parent's legacy? A sequel of sorts to "I Saw My Lady Weep". Reposting.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 25,314 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 43 - Published: 2/26/2009 - Scorpius M., Albus S. P.
I Saw My Lady Weep reviews
War takes a toll on everyone involved. Happy endings can be achieved, but never easily, and never quickly, even for those that are heroes. All ships are canon. Takes place after Deathly Hallows.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 32 - Words: 89,792 - Reviews: 428 - Favs: 425 - Follows: 186 - Updated: 4/17/2008 - Published: 2/17/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete