We interrupt this profile for an important message to one who has passed on. He will be remembered dearly.

OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion, or a Band-Aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

A moment of silence.

Copied off of Hermionechan90's profile

My Mother

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Female Come Backs

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

Life and Lemons

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade!

When life gives you mayonnaise...throw it back and say, "BITCH I ASKED FOR LEMONS!!"

When life gives you lemons throw them back and demand vodka.

When life gives you vodka, call all of your friends for a party.

When life gives you lemons, it wants you to make lemonade.

When life gives you apples, it’s trying to scare your doctor away.

When life gives you lemons, call him a pervert and ask if he reads fanfiction.

When life gives you oranges, ask what is with his obsession with citruses.

When life gives you lemons, it wants you to make lemonade.

When life gives you oranges, it wants you to make orange juice.

When life gives you apples, it wants you to make apple juice.

When life gives you grapes, it wants you to get drunk.

When life throws you lemons and it hits you in the eye, tell everyone you know "life is a bitch".

When life chucks lemons at you and hit hits you where it really hurts, squish the lemons and tell everyone, "life hurts you where it hurts you most".

When life gives you Lemons, throw them at your brother(s).

When life gives you grapes, make lemonade. Sit back, and let the world wonder how you did it.

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade just to please him...then throw it at life and say, "Screw you, I like grape juice, bitch!"

OKAY!! Who is this LIFE and why is he throwing stuff at people? It probably HURTS!! Of course it does!

My Current Stories (all updates will be sporadic): as of 6/3/18

A Very Grimm Story-Chapter 1 (edited), Chapter 2-... (Hiatus)

Naruto: Calm Before Storm-Acts I-XVIII (Completed), Acts XIX-... (WIP), All Acts (Discontinued, Undergoing Rewrite)

Great Expectations-Chapter 1-11 (Completed), Chapter 12-... (TBC, Undergoing Rewrite)

The Peck of Owls-Interludes I-VIII (Completed), Interlude IX-... (TBC, Undergoing Rewrite)

Diary of a Nobody-Customers 1-11 (Completed) Customers 12-... (WIP)

Acedia-Chapters 1-15 (Completed, Discontinued, Rewrite Posted)

The Portrait of a Lady (Story Officially Complete)

Acedia: Depression of the Soul-Break Away Arc (WIP)

Upcoming WIP:

Maelstrom of Pandora-... PH/Naruto Crossover, Naruto: Calm Before Storm REWRITE

Up until Uzumaki Naruto was five years old, Konohagakure tried to make it clear that his entire existence was unwanted. Then one day, a young man named Oz Vessalius showed up out of the blue with his friends, claiming to be the boy’s “sorta-uncle” through his late father. Now after twenty-five long years, the Pandora organization has come to the Elemental Nations to reclaim Xai Vessalius’ long-lost grandson.

Remains of the Day-... BSD/HP Crossover, inspired by DeliriumDescending’s How We Met Your Mother and Flicker Chapter 10: Mama Bear by wolfrainrules (Will be posted on a Mother's Day)

At one point, Dazai Osamu was known by another name. Before he became “Dazai,” his beloved mother would always refer to him as “Her Little Moon.” That pet name has never changed no matter which name he goes by. And he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Welcome to the Family, Stay for the Chaos-... YOI/FFVII AU Crossover

Where did the man who became the Living Legend in figure skating history come from? A look into the extensive family of one Viktor Raine Nikiforov. Inspired by Seito's Silver Hair, who was in turn inspired by midnightluck's tumblr post. A humorous collection of related one-shots featuring very familiar faces trying and (somewhat) succeeding in raising Baby!Viktor.

The Warrior and the Jinchuuriki-... Naruto/HP Crossover

Konoha used to be a peaceful shinobi village until out of nowhere, a white-haired civilian took an interest in the village's Jinchuuriki and residentiary pariah. The village was never the same again with the son of Jiraiya of the Sannin in the picture... Did I also mention that he's the reincarnation of Harry James Potter? Reincarnated!MOD!Genderfluid!Harry, Crack fic, Shonen-ai, Eventual ItachixHarry

(σ ﾟvﾟ)σ http: //archiveofourown.org /users/Kuroyuki_Kokuyoku/pseuds/Kuroyuki_Kokuyoku (just remove the spaces)

Things you should know about the Acedia series: (Updated as of 6/29/2019, now beta-ed by blackkat1325)

1) Will Harry/Hadrian still retain his Magic in the story? Why or why not?

Unfortunately, no. Sorry, readers. Say goodbye to your expectations of Wizard!Hadrian kicking ass as the Varia’s Cloud Officer. As of post!Triwizard Tournament, he no longer possesses a single drop of Magic in what the Wizards called a “Magical Core.” Instead, what replaces Magic is his Cloudy-Sky Flames. Just to clarify, he’s not considered a Muggle because of Dying Will Flames (DWF), but he does count as a Squib. DWF are technically a different form of supernatural energy not unlike Magic, thus allowing him to somewhat keep about half a foot in the Wizarding World.

So why don’t I let Harry/Hadrian keep his Magic and still be able to use Flames as well?

This is a creative choice I chose after reading a lot of KHR/HP crossover fics. The most common trope I’ve found in the crossover fandom was this: Magic and DWF are different classifications of supernatural forces, and characters are capable of using both with little to no problems. When I took a step back and examined what this would mean for the shared universe, it paints a picture that I don’t really like. In my opinion, this would make the power balance between both worlds uneven and creates too many possibilities to have an OP Mary/Gary Stu stealing the show and have one World’s flaws exaggerated while the flaws of the other World are being overlooked in favor of having a comparisonist excuse to demonize the other.

So in the Acedia universe, I created something like a “supernatural law of nature” of sorts that mandates that Magic and DWF are exclusively unique supernatural abilities for a good reason. Both came from different sources, both have their own perks and downsides, and both had influenced human history in their own ways. In addition, DWF and Magic conflict with one another. An individual cannot obtain both without suffering severe and/or fatal consequences.

2) What are the consequences to using both Flames and Magic?

Considering this phenomenon would be considered “unnatural” in the universe I’m creating, the conflicting natures of Magic and DWF causes the individual’s Core to “overload” for lack of a better description. Like a balloon being filled up with gas to the point of blowing up, there’s only so much a person’s Core can take before something has to give.

What would the consequences look like then?

For example… Suppose Zacharias Smith awoken his Lightning Flames. For about a week or two, he becomes ecstatic. He has all the versatility of his Magic, but at the same time, could utilize the overwhelming power of Flames. If his abilities in DADA is lacking, he can more than make up for it with the “Shielding Aspect” of his “Emerald Soul Shade.”

However, things start to seem off for Zacharias later on.

After a month, he notices that his body isn’t moving the way it used to. As time passes, it gets harder and harder for him to walk properly. He eventually loses the ability to write or use his wand because by the second month, the muscles in his arms are so stiff it’s like they were hit with the Full-Body Bind Curse. Eventually, those symptoms began to spread to the rest of his body.

Five months after he had awoken his “Emerald Soul Shade,” his major organs began showing the same “petrification” syndromes.

Because the condition is centered around his Magical Core, there’s no cure other than delaying the inevitable by giving Zacharias Potions and casting Spells that can help him ignore what is happening to his body. Even if an advanced Healing Spell were the only thing keeping the petrification from killing Zacharias Smith altogether via organ failure, he’d be stuck in that state until his body gives out. Assuming it is possible for a Witch or Wizard to be able to live without a heart, lungs, etc., I doubt they have a Healing Spell that could keep his brain alive long enough for it to be slowly fossilized like the rest of his body.

As you may have already guessed, the fatal side effects of a Witch or Wizard possessing DWF are dependent on what kind of Flames they have. So to sum, Magic DWF = overkill.

3) Who are Hadrian’s Guardians? What Flame Types do they have?

Hadrian Temperanza/Harry Potter (Cloudy-Sky)

Vardøger Doppelgänger/Fred Weasley (Lightning)

Eidolon Doppelgänger/George Weasley (Cloud)

Kaguya Tsukihime/Luna Lovegood (Sunny-Mist)

Leimakid Hyades/Neville Longbottom (Rainy-Forest)

Gargouille Serpens/Draco Malfoy (Cloudy-Storm)

Why these? The reasons why are a mixture of my whims and process of elimination. However, things may change as in future chapters so nothing is set in stone.

4) Speaking of DWF, what is the Wizarding World’s interpretation of them?

What the Mafia World calls “Dying Will Flames” is called “Soulfire Aspects” by Wizardkind. However, unlike the Cosa Nostra, they write it off as an ancient form of a “personality test” to see what type of Magic you’d be most suited for in life. The classifications would look something like this:

Lightning: (Emerald) Eccentricity-Counter-spells

Rain: (Turquoise) Compliance-Jinxes

Mist: (Sapphire) Astuteness-Transfiguration

Sun: (Topaz) Intensity-Healing Spells

Cloud: (Amethyst) Loyalty-Curses

Storm: (Ruby) Intuitiveness-Hexes

Sky: (Amber) Integrity-Charms

So let’s say during a class project on Divination, Ron discovers that he falls under the “Ruby Soul Shade” classification (aka Storm). To him and his classmates, this is a sign that he would have an easier time mastering Hexes.

The reason why there’s not a lot of interest delving any deeper than this is because Wizards don’t have a lot of information on Soulfire Aspects in the first place. Long story short, a few centuries ago around the height of the Witch Hunts, a lot of knowledge (or what little understanding they had) about Soulfire was lost and/or died out. This is more or less due to a discovery that the presence of Soulfire is the strongest in Squibs and Muggles. Needless to say, the idea that the God-fearing Muggles and the discarded leftovers of the Wizarding World may develop a way to fight back against Magic did not go well with medieval Wizardkind. So they destroyed what little information already existing and hoped Soulfire would eventually become a “dead” form of Magic.

Of course, things didn’t go entirely according to plan as Soulfire still exists as a “primitive Divination Art” in the Wizarding World (and later, monopolized by the Mafia by the time Giotto came around in the early 19th century, of course). To finish things off, keep in mind that medieval Wizarding World knowledge of Soulfire isn’t as sophisticated as the Mafia World’s modern understanding of Dying Will Flames. There’s also a whole history lesson about how that came to be, which I’ve already planned to show up during the Wizarding World Arc so I can’t explain any more than this without spoiling.

5) Why hasn’t the Vindice arrested Dumbledore yet for violating the Omertà?

Considering that one of the biggest points in the KHR fandom’s Omertà is making sure civilians are kept unaware of the supernatural side of the Mafia, I see the Vindice as not only the Mafia World’s version of the Dementor-themed Aurors, but they also double as their Obliviator Squads without the actual Spell used.

The people Dumbledore's been kidnapping thus far were all Muggleborns who've fallen back to the Muggle World, but they still have a direct connection to the Wizarding World. However, they also have a higher Soulfire Awakening capability than the average Muggle/Wizard because of their loose connections to the Mafia World. In Chapter 4, there is a brief mention of Zhang San's background. Reading in between the lines, he's actually the bastard son of a low ranking female member of the Chinese Triad. However, he was abandoned for having Magic instead of DWF.

So Dumbledore may not know it at the time, but he has been really toeing the line that's keeping him from taking a one way trip to the Vendicare, and he’s dragging his followers down with him in the process. However, that's going to change once the supply of unwanted Magical Mafia bastards in England dries up, and he has to resort to cutting corners to meet the demands of his war on Voldemort.

IMPORTANT UPDATE!!! (10/25/17)

I must apologize to all of my loyal readers. I will not be continuing my writing until further notice. You see, my laptop broke, and all of my files were saved on it. So in other words, we're talking about the loss of at least 20 WHOLE STORY CHAPTERS of all of my posted and unposted fics!!! Right now I'm trying to see if I can salvage my hardware and successfully transfer everything. If not, then I'm afraid that all of my stories will have to be put on-hold until further notice. I had promised myself that I won't leave any of you hanging for over a year, but if things are looking pretty bad, then I'm forced to have to break that promise. So again, I'm really sorry for this unwanted message. Thank you all so much for sticking with me all this time.

Kuroyuki

BAD NEWS!!!! (10/30/17)

My laptop is fixed, but the hard drive is broken. Not just that, but due to personal circumstances that are out of my control, I don't think I have it in me to continue writing for quite a while. And for that, let me apologize to my readers for this to happen. From now on, I am putting ALL of my stories on a hiatus. But while there may be no updates for a while, I'm going to use this opportunity to go back and revamp EVERYTHING, however, that'll take a bit of time. Once I feel like I can go back in the game, I'll replace all of the old chapters with newly revised versions as well as some new stories all at once. Although, I estimate it to be at least a year and half before that day will happen. But until then, thank you so much, everyone. No words can express how grateful I am for all of your support. I know some of you are disappointed by this announcement, but hopefully I can make it up to all of you after the long wait. But until then, thank you all for reading this message.

Hope to see everyone eventually,

Kuroyuki .｡･ﾟﾟ･( ཀ ʖ̯ ཀ)･ﾟﾟ･｡.

Personal Update (6/29/2019)

I've just graduated from my university. Now I'm currently in a hunt for a job, preparing for the hell that is "adulting", and getting my life together. Wish me luck, my dearest readers and fellow fanfiction authors~

Kuroyuki (-_-*)