January 13th, 2021: I'm back, losers. At 23 goddamn years old. Once in high school, I said "Well, I can't be writing fanfiction when I'm 20!!" Ha. Ha ha ha.

Hello everyone! My name is Emily, or Shy. I've been stuck in this fandom since like 2012 and writing fanfiction is the only thing that makes me happy anymore.

One thing I might note, I don't really support Hetalia in it's canon anymore. I find the show/manga pretty problematic and haven't touched it in years. Though it's a little odd, I've grown so attached to my interpretations of the characters that I can't stop writing them, no matter how distasteful I find their source material. This is basically my one coping mechanism, but yeah, I kind of hate the show now. None of my fics are based in canon, they are all AU's. I ask that you separate my works from the fandom as much as possible, even if that's kind of an absurd request.

Also, please keep in mind my older stuff was written when I was a teenager and aren't exactly free of problematic elements.

My one true inspiration continues to be George DeValier.

Independant Multi-Chapters

My Guardian Angel (Gerita, Ludwig/Feliciano): For Feliciano, everyday at school is a nightmare filled with people that love making him miserable. He thinks it will never end until one day during a particularly violent attack, a mysterious blue-eyed stranger comes out of nowhere and rescues him. Not long after, Feliciano starts to feel things he doesn't quite understand. Twenty-one chapters.

NoteL This was my first multi-chapter fic. Wrote it at... 15? While I don't think it's bad, I think my characterization was a bit off. Still, I'm proud of it.

All of Our Sins (Spamano, Antonio/Lovino): Lovino is Catholic, but he's not entirely sure what he believes. Nevertheless, he and his brother Feliciano are forced to attend confirmation classes. When Lovino meets their group leader- bizarre, cheerful Antonio; one of the first people to treat Lovino like he matters- things get complicated. When they find this church is much darker than it appears, things get terrifying.

Note: Uh, wrote this one when I was 15/16. It's definitely not free of problematic elements. Keep that in mind when reading it.

Bookstores to Nightclubs (PruCan, Gilbert/Matthew) : Matthew has social anxiety. Over the years, his condition had become so severe that it's nearly incapacitating. When he's on the brink of giving up and living a life of solitude, he meets Gilbert at the bookstore Matthew works in. Gilbert is just about the most out-going person Matthew has ever met, and for whatever reason, he is determined to get Matthew out more. Through this self-proclaimed 'awesome Prussian', Matthew begins to see what life really has to offer. But the question still remains: Will Gilbert understand his anxieties?

Note: This fic has been abandoned. Started it at 16-17 I believe. Honestly I think I tried to make it too long, I just don't have a way to continue it really. Plus, I was originally writing it for a friend I no longer speak to.

The Quiet One (Giripan, Heracles/Kiku)- Heracles is introverted, thoughtful, and most of all, quiet. But everything around him is loud- including his boyfriend of two years, Sadiq, who he no longer loves. Then, he meets Kiku- a transfer student who lacks the ability to speak, and Heracles realizes how much he’s missed the quiet.

Honestly I have no idea what I was thinking with this one. It's alright, but I feel like I made Heracles look like a huge jerk. I was like, 16 when I wrote this, please excuse the toxic/weird behavior a lot of the characters display.

Cupcake Batter (Fem!PruCan, Julchen/Madeline)- Julchen and Madeline were inseparable, until they weren't. Years after their falling out, Julchen is still struggling to let go. Especially with Madeline living right across the street. With Julchen in her hometown for the summer, she's forced to reexamine what their relationship was, and how it ended. And they can also avoid each other for so long...

This is my big 2021 comeback, I guess. Based on my own very specific trauma.

The Hospital-Verse: My baby, my everything...

In Another Life- (Giripan, Heracles/Kiku): Kiku’s life is an endless blur of work and monotony. He works as a nurse, and one day he’s switched to Hospice care. He isn’t sure about the change until he meets his first patient: Twenty-seven year old Heracles, a congestive heart failure patient with an uncanny ability to remain optimistic and kind through everything. Through him, Kiku begins to see the world through a whole new light. Before long, they find themselves falling in love. But love can’t protect either of them from the cold reality: Heracles has six months to live.

Not to say about this one besides I'm sorry. Now complete at 16 chapters.

Little Sunflower (RoChu, Ivan/Yao): When Yao goes to pick up his brother Kiku from his job at the hospital, he gets lost in the psychiatric ward. There, he runs into Ivan- an impatient suspected to have borderline personality disorder. Later, Dr. Williams realizes that Yao had an interesting and possibly helpful effect on Ivan. Yao is asked to visit Ivan as unconventional therapy, and what was supposed to be a job turns to much more.

This story was so much fun to write, and I think it's one of my favorites thus far. Now complete at 18 chapters.

The King & I (PruCan, Gilbert/Matthew): Matthew is a psychiatrist in a hospital psych ward. All day he deals with the insane, and he believes he's seen everything. When Gilbert- a man with an alternate personality that believes he's the king of the long-abolished Prussia- is forcibly admitted, he's proven wrong.

This was going to have an epilogue, but I decided it didn't need it. Complete at 18 chapters.

Fumbles & Fairytales (USUK, Alfred/Arthur): Alfred is cleaning out his closet one day when he comes across his old high school yearbook. While flipping through it, he comes across a picture of the best friend he lost contact with soon after graduation- Arthur Kirkland. Right then, he decides to find his friend again. After his brother Matthew, a psychiatrist, comes forth with information that he's been hiding, Alfred manages to find Arthur- in a hospital psych ward. No matter what anyone says about him and his so-called 'hallucinations', Alfred is determined to visit him each and every week. When friendship turns to more, Alfred begins to wonder if he can handle the baggage Arthur comes with.

THIS FIC IS CURRENTLY BEING REWRITTEN! I will update it here, and I will be posting the new version to ao3. I promise I'll finish it eventually. Ugh.

I was originally going to add the Nordics' side to this series, but I just don't have it in me to be honest. After Fumbles finally finishes, consider it a complete series.

One-Shots

Fading: Soulmate colors AU. All his life, Sadiq has only known grey. He never expected to find his soulmate, but when he meets his new roommate, Heracles, his life becomes a torrent of color... even if Heracles sees nothing at all. Sadiq is forced to keep what he sees a secret. But Heracles seems off, and as time goes on, Sadiq can only wonder why his colors are fading.

I only did this because I made the mistake of toying with the idea of a soulmate AU being present in the hospiverse, and when I realized the hospiverse is way too realistic for that, I settled on writing a completely separate, terribly unfair, downright cruel one-shot. Sorry!