Kleenexwoman
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Joined 02-22-04, id: 544181, Profile Updated: 04-24-10
Author has written 22 stories for Kevin Smith, Shakespeare, X-overs, Back to the Future, and Pendergast series.

"The basic tool for the manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use the words." --Philip Kindred Dick

"Sound is movement, you idiot; light is reflection. You cannot be imprisoned behind a piece of tape and paper. Record does not mean re-live, re-do, re-experience, remember...Record is not more real than you." --Nautical Almanac

"If it's not in the frame, it doesn't exist." --F.W. Murnau

"This is not for you." --Johnny Truant


Testimonials:

"Kleenexwoman writes primarily short, weird, thoughtful-type fics that have a preoccupation with time travel and old school sci-fi references. Her fics have a good sense of characterization, successful construction, and a quietly subversive sort of strangeness that is lacking in most fanfic." --DrWorm

"You know, I can always recognise one of your stories. There's a... bleakness, to some of them, a feeling of helplessness, for lack of a better term. A feeling that I can't quite pin down, but it makes my chest ache a little bit.
And sometimes you write sweet stories, but there's always that depth behind them...
(Me): Helplessness. Hmmm.
The best word I can come up with at the moment.
I dunno.
Like I'm missing something, but I can't quite put my finger on what it is?
Like looking up into space and thinking about Star Trek, and aching so badly to be in that world, to be up there in space, and knowing you never will be.
A feeling like that, sometimes.
That ache." --Artemis Boyd

"kleenexwoman builds her own hats from scratch with the help of alf and harry from harry and the hendersons. the three of them are planning on stealing the mona lisa and replacing it with a screenshot depicting my best minesweeper time." --B.J. Williams

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality by Less Wrong reviews
Petunia married a biochemist, and Harry grew up reading science and science fiction. Then came the Hogwarts letter, and a world of intriguing new possibilities to exploit. And new friends, like Hermione Granger, and Professor McGonagall, and Professor Quirrell... COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 122 - Words: 661,619 - Reviews: 32465 - Favs: 19,357 - Follows: 15,738 - Updated: 3/14/2015 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
An Ordinary Meeting by aragonite reviews
Lestrade meets the man mad enough to room with Sherlock Holmes.
Sherlock Holmes - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 9 - Words: 27,235 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 154 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 8/10/2008 - Published: 4/10/2008
The Puzzle by Doodleflip reviews
A SusanTeatime oneshot. Yes, I realise everyone thinks I'm insane now, but there really isn't enough out there about these two. In the house that Death built, nothing is as it seems, not least the visitors... Please R&R!
Discworld - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,238 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/14/2007 - Complete
Picture This by TrudiRose reviews
AU. Is it possible to write a GastonBelle pairing that's believable and in character? Or have I lost my mind? Read and find out!
Beauty and the Beast - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 31 - Words: 130,507 - Reviews: 1313 - Favs: 1,070 - Follows: 164 - Updated: 5/30/2006 - Published: 3/5/2006 - Gaston, Belle - Complete
Pariah by hyacinthian reviews
And that's the root of it all. They're unwanted. [IceAnybodys]
West Side Story - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,073 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/19/2005 - Complete
Back to the Future Fanfic Chain by Movie Fanfic Chains reviews
Multi-writer. A malfunction occurs with the DeLorean sending Marty and Doc into the very distant future controlled by "The System". An imprisoned man reduced to madness may be Marty and Doc's only hope of returning home before "The System" finds them.
Back to the Future - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,359 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 6/1/2005 - Published: 1/24/2005
Carefully Everywhere Descending by The Amazing Maurice reviews
(Calvin and Hobbes) The more things change, the more they stay the same. A ‘what if?’ fairytale; futurefic, pre-slash (complete). I don't know what came over me.
Misc. Comics - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,961 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/18/2004 - Complete
The Domesday Books by ThePet reviews
Sebastian Domesday, defective detective, lives at 227d Baker Street with his small friend Arthur Mulberry and his basset-hound Moriarty...some cheeky humour, nothing gross. An affectionate parody.
Sherlock Holmes - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,885 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/8/2001
Holy Trinity High School Computer Club by Byl Glinka reviews
A high school computer club gets too close to the Truth
Matrix - Rated: T - English - Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,416 - Reviews: 141 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 12 - Published: 8/21/2000
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

il nome della cordula reviews
Constance gives Corrie a new name,
Pendergast series - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 493 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Published: 4/24/2010 - Constance G., Corrie S. - Complete
Viola Drabbles reviews
I put my playlist on shuffle and wrote stories around songs for Viola.
Pendergast series - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 891 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 4/24/2010 - Viola M. - Complete
Happiness reviews
Rule 63 genderswap . A "Brimstone" AU.
Pendergast series - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,507 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Published: 4/24/2010 - A. Pendergast, V. D'Agosta - Complete
First Kisses
two short femmeslash stories. Margo/Nora, Corrie/Constance.
Pendergast series - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,485 - Published: 4/24/2010 - Margo G., Nora K. - Complete
Feather reviews
Corrie and Constance bond over freaks.
Pendergast series - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,806 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Published: 4/24/2010 - Constance G., Corrie S. - Complete
Daddy Can I Turn This reviews
Pendergast and Corrie slide into a complicated new phase in their relationship. BDSM.
Pendergast series - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,253 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 4 - Published: 4/24/2010 - A. Pendergast, Corrie S. - Complete
Dry Heat
After Bill's death, Nora must navigate her own fears and desires.
Pendergast series - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,135 - Favs: 2 - Published: 4/24/2010
You and Me Baby Ain't Nothing But Mammals reviews
We call this the act of mating, but there are several other very important differences between human beings and animals that you should know about.
Back to the Future - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,428 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Published: 4/1/2006 - Complete
Time Is A Wave And A Particle reviews
Warning: Side effects may include insomnia, drowsiness, headaches, dizzy spells, fainting fits, hysteria, ennui, apophenia, hallucinations, seizures, amnesia, comas, death, and slight nausea. Safe when used as directed.
Back to the Future - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,063 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/17/2005 - Complete
Places You Never Knew Are Just Where They’ve Been reviews
Today is not the day he would have picked for what is going to happen, but that’s what makes it so important that it’s today.
Back to the Future - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,262 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/5/2005 - Complete
Days Of Future Passed reviews
It worries George sometimes that his clearest memories aren’t the right ones, or at least not the ones that he really thinks he should remember.
Back to the Future - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,692 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/25/2005 - Complete
Subtextual Homesick Alien reviews
Up above, aliens hover, making home movies for the folks back home, of all these weird creatures who lock up their spirits, drill holes in themselves, and live for their secrets.
Back to the Future - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,106 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 2/10/2005 - Complete
Stay Silent reviews
George wishes that Marty Klein would shut up sometimes.
Back to the Future - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 563 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 4 - Published: 1/19/2005 - Complete
My Science Fiction Twin reviews
Is doing better than expected. He's trapped in his own parallel dimension, that's why I'm so forgiving...
Back to the Future - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,065 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/29/2004 - Complete
Reeling Off The Years reviews
While taking Marty up to college, George gets a chance to revisit his own past.
Back to the Future - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,058 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 12 - Published: 10/17/2004 - Complete
Time Is A Cumular Limit reviews
The life around us is but a reflection of our own, flowing within neverending boundless infinity.
Back to the Future - Rated: T - English - Angst/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 750 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 5 - Published: 9/15/2004 - Complete
I Palindrome I reviews
We: mom, I, son, and DNA. No, is Mom? Ew!
Back to the Future - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 145 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Published: 9/14/2004 - Complete
Two Fans And A Temporal Displacement Device reviews
The title says it all, really.
X-overs - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 8,818 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 7/24/2004 - Complete
The Divine Rehabilitation Of Jason Mewes reviews
Reality can be stranger than any movie for Jason Mewes.
Kevin Smith - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Mystery - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,363 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 7 - Published: 4/19/2004 - Complete
Blue Jay reviews
Jay offends a witch and Silent Bob must set things right.
Kevin Smith - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,865 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 10 - Updated: 3/23/2004 - Published: 3/15/2004 - Complete
The Parodie Of Romeo And Juliet reviews
A lovely little parody that won first place in a OneAct Play festival. Enjoy the fruits of my labor, you lowly serfs!
Shakespeare - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,254 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/11/2004 - Complete
Brain Freezy reviews
A homicidal maniac frequents the Quick Stop. Apologies to anyone who is actually homicidal or a maniac.
Kevin Smith - Rated: T - English - Humor/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,216 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/22/2004 - Complete