pizzamargherita
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Joined 01-27-14, id: 5485036, Profile Updated: 12-10-17
Author has written 5 stories for Hobbit, and Lord of the Rings.
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Pathology by appalled.elf reviews
Rhodri, a London-based psychologist, ends up in Middle-Earth. She decides to roll with it and opens a practice in Rivendell. This has a storyline to it. Romance crops up here and there. CW: adult themes, discusses death, mental illness, torture. Some foul language, but not too much.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 106 - Words: 416,916 - Reviews: 542 - Favs: 132 - Follows: 143 - Updated: 8/1/2020 - Published: 2/9/2020 - Elrond, Glorfindel, Elf, OC
The Pied Pipers of Gondor by lindahoyland reviews
Feisty fish-loving felines pose problems for Aragorn and Faramir.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,299 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 4 - Published: 6/7/2020 - Aragorn, Arwen U., Faramir, OC
Drabbles by hannah.jpg reviews
One-shots featuring a particular King of Rohan and one Princess of Dol Amroth. Most humorous, some romantic, and all squee-worthy.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 41,232 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 84 - Follows: 88 - Updated: 9/7/2018 - Published: 5/22/2017 - Eomer, Lothíriel
Bone-White by Dawn Felagund reviews
After wandering accidentally near to Mandos, Caranthir encounters a procession delivering his newly reembodied brother back to the world: Maedhros. Caranthir breaks into his tent, and the two discuss healing, mutability, and the things that will never change.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,556 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/24/2017 - Caranthir, Maedhros - Complete
Of the Coming of Fingolfin to Mandos and His Meeting with Fëanor by cycas reviews
How *do* dead elves get to the Halls of Mandos anyway? And once they get there, what do they say to one another? Fingolfin could feel his temper rising, predictable, and yet he could not stop it. His years of kingship vanished in the mist. He was the younger, less talented, less cherished brother again, but one with a list of grievances that had grown very long.
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,535 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/2/2017 - Fëanor, Fingolfin - Complete
The Lion and his Lady by Lialathuveril reviews
How did Éomer of Rohan meet his wife? This is a series of oneshots describing different scenarios, some long some short, some serious some less so. No connection with each other or any of my other stories. Number 8: Joust
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 46,220 - Reviews: 263 - Favs: 298 - Follows: 105 - Updated: 9/3/2017 - Published: 10/22/2007 - Eomer, Lothíriel - Complete
Nerdanel and Fëanor : Messages by cycas reviews
A series of extracts from the Mandos Messaging Service.
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,368 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 5 - Published: 5/14/2017 - Fëanor, Nerdanel - Complete
Legolas Thranduillion's 30-Day Character Transformation by Araloth the Random reviews
Legolas and Aragorn decide there are more noble ways to help the fanfiction OCs that keep dropping into Minas Tirith other than killing the poor things off - which is their usual way of dealing with the problem - and send out an ad complete with hashtags. Of course, they have no idea what they're in for...
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 12 - Words: 30,801 - Reviews: 184 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 1/11/2017 - Published: 8/5/2015 - Aragorn, Legolas
A Study of Beauty, or A Walk in the Garden by lena1987 reviews
A deep and meaningful cultural conflict on the fields of Cormallen. Or rather, Amrothos and Eothain discuss the differences between Gondorian and Rohirric women, and Eomer takes a chance. M for language only.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,888 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/13/2015 - Eomer, Lothíriel, Amrothos, Eothain - Complete
Howzat! by annafan reviews
The Field of Cormallen wasn't all jousting and tourneys... No, the flower of Gondor's knighthood had other pastimes, pastimes which the Rohirrim found confusing, to say the least. Inspired by the distinctly Aussie twang of Lena1987's Eomer. G'Day! (M only for the rather earthy language, no other reason). Part 1 of "The Silk Road".
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,607 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/8/2015 - Eomer, Lothíriel, Amrothos, Eothain
I Could Eat a Horse by lena1987 reviews
Éothain decides that Gondorians are barbarians after all.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 393 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/4/2015 - Eomer, Amrothos, Erchirion, Eothain - Complete
Béma! by lena1987 reviews
Amrothos has an educational experience, Rohirrim style. The night before annafan's amazing 'Howzat', because the Rohirrim are Aussies, didn't you know?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 585 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 6 - Published: 6/28/2015 - Eomer, Amrothos, Eothain - Complete
The Everyday Problems of a Tenth Walker by lycanthrophy-kitsune reviews
These are one-shot drabbles of the everyday, funny problems that a tenth walker would encounter. Just popped into my head and wanted to have some fun. Please mention some problems you would like for me to write in a review. Thanks!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 20 - Words: 30,121 - Reviews: 109 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 79 - Updated: 2/20/2015 - Published: 1/22/2014 - Aragorn, Boromir, Legolas, OC
The Little Wooden Horse by annafan reviews
It is not often that King Theoden finds himself confronted with a situation he does not know how to handle, but choosing a birthday present for a small girl is one of them.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,122 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/11/2014 - Théoden, Eomer, Eowyn
For the Sake of a Story by Jesus' girl 4ever reviews
Gimli amuses the hobbits by telling a story. Legolas 'helps' him.
Crossover - Lord of the Rings & Hobbit - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 716 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 31 - Published: 3/1/2014 - Legolas, Gimli, Glóin - Complete
A Noble Endurance by a-mild-looking-sky reviews
Legolas still waits for Thranduil on the shores of Valinor. [companion piece to 'Forgotten', though reading of that is not essential for understanding this]
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,350 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 12 - Published: 3/1/2014 - Legolas, Thranduil - Complete
Not the Beard! by aotearoan reviews
Beards, and their impact on various members of the Fellowship. Ch 4: Teenage Aragorn comes to terms with his difference from the Rivendell elves, but can they? Ch 3: Young Gimli meets a human... something is missing. Ch 2: Young hobbits meet the mysterious Gandalf. Havoc is wreaked. Ch 1: A terrifying ordeal for a young Legolas (also starring Thranduil).
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,178 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 84 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 2/8/2014 - Published: 9/7/2010 - Gandalf, Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli
Celeborn At A Glance by TolkienScribe reviews
Celeborn was not an easy person to decipher at a glance, but perhaps a look into the events of his life could give an insight of who he was as the years passed him by. From his childhood to his sailing. One-shot. Complete. Please read and review! :)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,379 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 7 - Published: 1/20/2014 - Galadriel, Celeborn, Thranduil, Elf - Complete
Elves Do Not Celebrate, They Remember by Darkover reviews
Legolas experiences one of the differences between the lives of Elves, and the lives of Men.
Crossover - Lord of the Rings & Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,446 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 11 - Published: 1/19/2014 - Legolas, Thranduil, Bard, The Master of Lake-Town - Complete
A Few Notes on Medieval Life by Gaia caecilia reviews
A hopefully helpful little piece covering the basics of medieval life which people may not know but would find useful for any story involving the medieval world. Written by a medieval period re-enactor focussing on important points, especially the mistakes i most commonly see. Will happily take requests for more info. So far primarily covers clothing/armour/weapons.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,577 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 4 - Published: 4/14/2013
A Spider by Vaneria Potter reviews
An authorized follow-up to Lamiel's hysterical fic 'An Elk', which should be read to fully understand some of the references. Thranduil's snarkily irate return 'gift' to his Lothlorien cousin.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,246 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 170 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 2/21/2013 - Published: 2/18/2013 - Elvenking Thranduil - Complete
An Elk? by Lamiel reviews
The Elvenking has a reason for everything he does. Really. COMPLETE.
Hobbit - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,775 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 334 - Follows: 45 - Published: 2/3/2013 - Legolas, Elvenking Thranduil
If Gondor Can Spare You by Itarille1 reviews
Faramir and Eowyn, shortly before their parting
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 512 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 15 - Published: 11/14/2011 - Faramir, Eowyn - Complete
Greener Pastures by Girlbird reviews
A King of Rohan mourns a dying companion...
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,624 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 7 - Published: 6/18/2011 - Eomer, Lothíriel - Complete
Beruthiel's Kittens by LadyBranwyn reviews
During the Siege of Minas Tirith, the healers are not the only ones tending to the wounded. OCs and unconscious Faramir.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 814 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/6/2010 - Faramir - Complete
A Problematic Dragon by sylc reviews
Smaug arrives in Mandos and appropriates Feanor's treasure-filled rooms for himself, threatening death to those who resist him. Thankfully, everyone there is already dead. What's Namo to do? Beta read by jesuiscanadien, Neoinean, and Rebecca.
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,176 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 20 - Published: 10/8/2010 - Námo - Complete
The Boy Is Doomed by sylc reviews
Pengolodh of Gondolin complains about his new student, Maeglin, to Ecthelion and Glorfindel.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,095 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 24 - Published: 9/21/2010 - Maeglin, Glorfindel - Complete
The Ale Has It by Snacky8 reviews
Eowyn was just trying to prove a point about Gondorian beer. Cowritten by Crantz.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 576 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 13 - Published: 9/16/2010 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
The Silmarillion Gospel by Araloth the Random reviews
*Third Place MEFA 2010!* What happens when a group of clueless fangirls try to "translate" the Silmarillion into Biblical English? Utter chaos, of course!
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,187 - Reviews: 89 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 7/24/2010 - Published: 12/22/2009
Promises by Lialathuveril reviews
Sixty-three years after the Ring War, Éomer of Rohan reaches the end of a full life and his wife Lothíriel has to deal with her loss. Warning: character death
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,596 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 8 - Published: 1/13/2010 - Lothíriel, Eomer - Complete
The Fanfiction Testament by Araloth the Random reviews
*Honourable Mention MEFA 2010!* [Complete] And from the LoTR Obsessants proceedeth the Fanfiction writers. But not all were true to Canon, and thus there was much flaming and strife among them. And Legolas spake unto the fangirls...
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,914 - Reviews: 239 - Favs: 192 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 10/1/2009 - Published: 5/24/2009 - Complete
Fair Wanderer, Thou Makest Me Sick by Araloth the Random reviews
*Honourable Mention MEFA 2010!* [Complete] Whilst wandering through Ithilien Legolas has the misfortune to meet a Sue in denial who thinks she can speak Shakespearean English.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,150 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 5 - Published: 1/22/2009 - Complete
Okay, NOW Panic! by boz4PM reviews
This is the sequel to Don't Panic! We follow Penny as she journeys with Elrond and Arwen south to Minas Tirith, via Lothlorien and Edoras. She thought Bree and Imladris were bad? She ain't seen nothing yet.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 60 - Words: 465,490 - Reviews: 2518 - Favs: 1,803 - Follows: 621 - Updated: 9/13/2008 - Published: 4/10/2004 - Complete
Strange Alliances by Erestor reviews
A battle to save the history of MiddleEarth results in the formation of several strange alliances: fangirls aid Morgoth, Sauron aids the Valar [or does he?], and certain Elves and humans must choose to serve the winning side. But which side would that be?
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 44 - Words: 91,110 - Reviews: 506 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 81 - Updated: 11/20/2006 - Published: 8/13/2005
Thangorodrim by fanged geranium reviews
An irreverent look at Fingon rescuing Maedhros.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 404 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/3/2005
A Boy, A Girl And Of Course, His Horse by Lackwit reviews
Learning to ride a horse is simple, isn't it, if your teacher is King of the Horse-Lords?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,875 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/6/2004 - Eomer, Lothíriel
Don't Panic! by boz4PM reviews
Penny is panicking. Where is she? How did she get here? How is she going to get home and whose backside will she kick first when she does? A woman lost in Middle Earth wearing only her pyjamas. This can't be good... (STRONG language; NOT a M-Sue)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 27 - Words: 136,860 - Reviews: 1397 - Favs: 2,626 - Follows: 605 - Updated: 3/27/2004 - Published: 1/17/2004
It's What for Dinner? by Alteng reviews
Don't ask! Let's just say the answer is orc stew! Please, R&R and let me know your out there!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 709 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Published: 3/6/2004 - Complete
The Game of the Gods by Limyaael reviews
COMPLETE Morgoth and Varda are playing a little game. Morgoth's weapon: Mary Sues. Varda's weapon: Reality. Rated for violence and Vala OOCness.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Adventure - Chapters: 35 - Words: 73,692 - Reviews: 852 - Favs: 917 - Follows: 130 - Updated: 11/25/2003 - Published: 9/13/2003 - Complete
I, Grûsbálk by Simbelmyne reviews
*AU* All Amy wanted was a movie-based Middle-earth, where everyone spoke English and she was a lovely elf-maid. Sadly, she had a sadist for a writer. Read about her saga of pain, love, and despair. But mostly pain. [7/7: 9/9 & epilogue] *COMPLETE!*
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 21,071 - Reviews: 132 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 7/6/2003 - Published: 10/24/2002 - Complete
The Sinking of Númenor by Jen Littlebottom reviews
The real reason Númenor was sunk, and, on a related theme, why there are no Fae in Middle-earth. Contains bizarre humour, angry Valar, and a sheep.
Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,149 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 5 - Published: 5/20/2003
The Adventures of Sister Mary Susan, SJ by Deborah Judge reviews
A slashwriting Jesuit goes to Beleriand. Silmarillion-based. Parody, not intended to offend.
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,064 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 12 - Published: 11/4/2002 - Complete
The Curse of Oropher by Katharine Faith reviews
The only acceptable "Thranduil-tortures-Legolas" story on the Net, as far as I'm concerned. This one's for the ladies! Final edit complete.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 774 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/23/2002 - Legolas - Complete
The Official Fanfiction University of Middleearth by misscam reviews
The fic that spawned miniBalrogs, Elrond's Naturally Nine, the MorgothSauron feud, Urple, the WitchWall and finally, Gimli got the girl.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 64 - Words: 66,366 - Reviews: 3186 - Favs: 2,015 - Follows: 234 - Updated: 7/12/2002 - Published: 3/8/2002 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Hangover - Minas Tirith Edition reviews
The Imrahilions and the Rohirrim hit the White City for Faramir's stag do. What could possibly go wrong? (My sincere apologies, Professor Tolkien!)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 16,537 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 2/12 - Published: 1/10/2018 - Eowyn, Faramir, Eomer, Amrothos - Complete
Purple Elks reviews
Legolas and Tauriel's first meeting, or: Two little elflings decide to hate each other at first sight. Will it last? Probably not. Will they ever stop challenging each other? Unlikely. But after all, opposites attract, don't they?
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 44 - Words: 245,682 - Reviews: 444 - Favs: 190 - Follows: 126 - Updated: 1/1/2015 - Published: 1/27/2014 - [Legolas, Tauriel] Elvenking Thranduil, OC - Complete
What do we say? reviews
Written for a drabble challenge about gratitude: Twice the same gift, twice the same answer - well, almost.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 205 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Published: 11/23/2014 - Aragorn, Elrond, Gilraen - Complete
A Friend in Need reviews
Firefoot takes his master's love life into his own hooves.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,950 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 11 - Published: 11/1/2014 - [Eomer, Lothíriel] - Complete
Old Wives' Tales reviews
A Gondorian damsel who speaks five languages, writes poetry and plays the harp but can't tell a horse from a cow is the last thing King Éomer needs. As for Lady Lothíriel of Dol Amroth, the mere thought of being married off to some barbarian war chief from the North gives her palpitations. What on earth were their relatives thinking?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,472 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 13 - Published: 10/16/2014 - [Eomer, Lothíriel] Eowyn, Imrahil - Complete