Alteng
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Joined 04-02-01, id: 54972, Profile Updated: 07-26-09
Author has written 25 stories for Doctor Who, Pirates of the Caribbean, Lord of the Rings, Dracula, Harry Potter, Starblazers, Yu-Gi-Oh, ThunderCats, Misc. Books, and Ice Age.

I haven't updated this for quite some time. So, since I can't sleep this morning, I figure I wilol go ahead and do it.

I spend most of my time on Fictionpress nowadays, but I do pop in here every once and awhile to read something. It all depends upon my mood. Mostly, I am focused on writing my original fiction called "Bane of Rendsberg". If you are interested in reading an unique vampire fantasy story, this one will do it. The penname is the same there as it is here. This is where the character Alteng shows up, by the way. I have a couple of fanfictions with him in mind, but I have never written any of them. Oh, he's a guy, and I'm not. The name is just unique enough to not have a number behind it, and he is my favorite character of my own creation.

The stories I have here range in many and various varieties. The Harry Potter stories were a joke . . . well, most of them anyway. So, don't take them seriously. I have the tendency of writing Ron gay and having a secret thing for Malfoy. I am unsure how this came about, but it did. Understand, I write mostly comedy and parodies over here. In no way did I think Ron was gay in the books, although he has PMS more often than I do. Anyway, these stories were an effort for me to write short stories and they are based around one scene. The same can be said about the Starblazers and the one Yu-Gi-Oh story. Anyway, if you want a good laugh, check out one of the short ones. I personally like "Photos" and "Little Fluff Balls".

My normal writing style is in The Pirates of the Carribean story- The Mishappen Tale of Two Inedpt Pirates. Someday, I might finish that story. I do have an end in mind. I just got elsewhere.

The Hobbit parody was orginally written when I was 12 or there about. I had to rewrite it for this site. It retains more of the original than Bane of Rendsberg does. That is another one for a good laugh.

The Doctor Who stories are from the old series up to and including the Colin Baker years. I can't say that I will be writing any more of these stories, although James wants me to write a Torchwood story. I might, but I am making no promises.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Star Mile by Amphytrion reviews
Wendy is older now and coming to realize that not everything is as simple as good triumphing over evil. Hook/Wendy.
Peter Pan - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 29,171 - Reviews: 143 - Favs: 112 - Follows: 122 - Updated: 8/9/2008 - Published: 6/6/2007 - Captain Hook, Wendy D.
Hooked on Power by VictorianChik reviews
Capt Hook finds a new way to deal with his archenemy. However, the more he interacts with Peter, the more he finds that his life and the island begin to change, especially when the woman he loved reappears in his dreams. Contains spanking of preteens.
Peter Pan - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 12 - Words: 46,249 - Reviews: 358 - Favs: 232 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 5/28/2008 - Published: 11/27/2006 - Captain Hook, Peter Pan - Complete
Promise of the Last Kiss by Kittie Darkhart reviews
The years of innocence have faded, leaving a woman, not a child, in its wake. The desire to accept the inevitable advent of adulthood approaches, and she, upon her wedding day, considers before a fatal twist of destiny comes by the grave turn of a Hook.
Peter Pan - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 80,955 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 3/13/2008 - Published: 12/13/2006 - Captain Hook, Wendy D.
Trespass by Calico Kat reviews
A Snape's POV response to the OotP chapter "Snape's Worst Memory."
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,126 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 7 - Published: 7/1/2004 - Severus S., Harry P.
Lurtz: An Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual by Gaslight reviews
Learn all that you need to know about your new LURTZ, fresh from the factory! Inspired by Theresa Green's series and posted with permission.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,752 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/4/2003 - Uruk-hai - Complete
Stable Girl by Sus reviews
A stablehand is nice to Grima, but he does not understand her kindness. Perhaps she is not so stable after all...Based more on the movies than on the books, but even so not strictly in line with events...
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 8,654 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 2/10/2003 - Published: 1/15/2003 - Grima W. - Complete
But Fluffles, It's Just A Scratch! by Lady Cassandra reviews
(Rating is just to be safe.) Kagome: Sesshoumaru-sama is tired of walking! Wait, Rin's hurt? Sesshy takes her flying?! This is too wierd for me. Find out if Rin's gonna be o.k on the next episode: But Fluffles, It's Just A Scratch! See you soon!
Inuyasha - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,751 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Published: 12/3/2002
Angels and Devils by Duncan Johnson reviews
What price would you pay to turn back death? The fourth in a series of adventures for the eighth Doctor and Mina Harker.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 25,493 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/1/2002
Sesshomaru's Lawnmower by Gabby3 reviews
Well the title kind of say's it, Sesshomaru gets a lawnmower, what ever will he, Rin, Jaken, and Hojo-kun (yes Hojo-kun) do?
Inuyasha - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,155 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 11/27/2002 - Published: 11/17/2002
The Emerald Sword Saga by Elric reviews
Chaos prepares to strike on Agalord and the Warriorof Ice begins his search for the Emerald Sword...
Song Fics - Rated: K - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16,524 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/10/2002
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Bath Time for a Dirty Sloth reviews
Sid smells really bad, and he needs a bath. The gang decides to give him one.
Ice Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,599 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/8/2009
Travellers of the Night reviews
Alternative versions of Dracula and Carmilla. Twisted humor and romance abound! Please be kind and R&R. You review mine, I will return the favor! Chapter 23 is one of my favs!
Dracula - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 27 - Words: 75,951 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 12/9/2007 - Published: 3/24/2004
The Shadow Over Fintail reviews
It is a parody on the H.P. Lovecraft story of The Shadow over Innsmouth. Have a good laugh, and if anyone reads this, drop me a review and let me know.
Misc. Books - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,594 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 1/28/2007 - Complete
The Death of Snarf reviews
Snarf is found dead. LionO sets out to discover who did such a dastardly deed. Read, Review, and Enjoy!
ThunderCats - Rated: T - English - Humor/Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 828 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 11/28/2005
Photos reviews
There are some interesting photos floating around Hogswart. Part 3 and the final part is now up. Please, read and Review, and more may follow.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,396 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/26/2005 - Published: 6/3/2004 - Complete
The Quidditch Incident reviews
A short, and a very short Short! Ron is hurt in a freak accident on the Quidditch field.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 299 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/22/2005 - Ron W. - Complete
The Unofficial Parody of The Hobbit reviews
It's what the title says. Let's say, just plain silliness.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 26,635 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/6/2005 - Published: 5/7/2005 - Bilbo B. - Complete
Satisfaction reviews
Being the leader of the Gamilon race is a hard job!
Starblazers - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 119 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 12/11/2004 - Complete
A Little Yoai reviews
This is a one time shot and was inspired by a rant on a YuGiOh forum. Good Marik takes over Tea's body to talk to his evil self, but there is more in his mind than he thought. Marik OoC. Read and enjoy, but don't take seriously!
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,225 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 12/5/2004 - Complete
A Game We Shouldn't Play reviews
The duel that was never told about that Yugi played! It is a crossover from one of my original works and the Yu-Gi-Oh universe with a few more universes thrown in there for good measure! My first Yu-Gi-Oh story, so be kind and read and review!
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 12,322 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 12/3/2004 - Published: 10/13/2004
The Mishappen Tales of Two Inept Pirates reviews
A story about Pintel and Ragetti, just in case you didn't think that they escaped. I have plans for many chapters of this story, so please R&R, and I'll return the favor
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 74,110 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 10/11/2004 - Published: 2/19/2004
Gryffindor Girls Group reviews
What's going on in the Gryffindor girls? Read and find out!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 457 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 9/13/2004 - Published: 6/4/2004
Next reviews
Nova is a busy woman on board the Argo. This is a joke among the friends I work with, so take it in that humor. And yes, it is PG13!
Starblazers - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 297 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/14/2004 - Complete
Little Fluff Balls reviews
Mrs. Norris has been missing. Where is she and what has she been doing? A very short one shot! Please, be kind and read and review!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 803 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 3 - Published: 5/28/2004 - Argus F. - Complete
Atonement of Sins reviews
Barbosa is dead, but things don't stop there for him. He must return to make atonements for his wrongs, but the higher ups have given him a little help for the job. Will he keep his sanity? Please, R&R!
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,012 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/9/2004
It's So Big reviews
A shot piece. Hagrid has a big surprise for all! R&R is you dare.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 471 - Reviews: 11 - Published: 4/11/2004 - Complete
Harry Potter and the Holy Relic of Vecna reviews
What happens when Hermione discovers the Holy Relic of Vecna. A series of short scenes. Read and review if you dare! In the process of a rewrite and adding more characters.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 26 - Words: 4,971 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 4/6/2004 - Published: 3/26/2004 - Complete
It's What for Dinner? reviews
Don't ask! Let's just say the answer is orc stew! Please, R&R and let me know your out there!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 709 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/6/2004 - Complete
The Curse of Tinkerbell reviews
What happens when the third Doctor gets bonked on the head with a teapot? Well, the other incarnations of the Doctor have to come to his rescue! R&R and enjoy! Finally completed!
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 29,592 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 1/29/2004 - Published: 12/12/2003 - Complete
The Rodent: Terror of the Wasteland reviews
What happens when the Rodent finds the refrigerator bare! It's time to get some food. Please R&R. The last Rodent story for awhile.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,496 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 1/26/2004 - Complete
The Rodent: Holiday on Skaro reviews
Another Rodent story. Mikey wants to go home, and he can be a persuasive little bugger. PLease, R&R! Now completed! Wohoo!
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 32,096 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 1/15/2004 - Published: 12/11/2003 - Complete
Hardware in Mixed Company reviews
The crossover that everyone has waited for (not really)! Doctor Who meets Star Wars. What happens when the Doctor lands on Tatooine and is mistaken for Luke Skywalker.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,045 - Reviews: 7 - Follows: 4 - Published: 12/11/2003
The Rodent: Lunch Break reviews
Another sotryof that amazing Time Lady, the Rodent. And the Doctor is in this one, too. Hey! What better thing for two Time Lords to do than grab a lunch at McDonald's! Please R&R and let me know you're out there!
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,656 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/8/2003 - Complete
The Rodent: Mechanical Mayhem and Monsters reviews
The first story of that incredible Time Lady and dumpster diver The Rodent. If you don't find it funny, at least it's weird. R&R, please.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,000 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/4/2003 - Complete
Does He or Doesn't He reviews
An amusing little . . . uh . . . well a long limmick. Rating due to the fact that it rather suggestive!
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 914 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/13/2002 - Complete