Author has written 62 stories for Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Criminal Minds, Greek Mythology, Teen Wolf, Sky High, Lucifer, Elementary, and Maleficent.
MORTALS: MEET... Winner of the 2015 Energize W.I.P. Award, Most promising Percy Jackson and the Olympians
Never in my wildest dreams I would have thought that 'Mortals: Meet...' and 'Mortals: Meet... 2' would be the huge success they are. Even today, years after I originally posted them, I get some comments and reviews about it. I'm so humbled that you guys like them than makes me write this.
I've noticed that, probably with no malign intention, some people have been leaving reviews about how 'this is not how someone with that attitude or personality behaves'- I'm gonna leave that in general terms.
Normally, I have no troubles in someone telling this is wrong but I fear some might think that I'm like that- something I'd like to answer with a big fat NO.
Though it pains me to admit it, the stars of the chapters aren't the demigods, but the MORTALS they encounter. And those mortals-besides being fidgets of my imaginations -are completely stereotyped.
If people like that does really exist and I offended some, I deeply apologize as it wasn't my intention. My intention was to show some funny or sad chapter that would make the demigod rise and shine from any situation.
To those who leave anecdotes or funny thought in the comments, please continue to do so. I'm always happy to hear someone saying 'I had a male teacher in kindergarden' or 'I'd work for free at Leo's!' cause that for me is the sign of a well-done job.
Love you all
Ho Ho Ho! It's safe to say that by now, Merry Christmas, everyone! I know there are people from different times zones, so I wanted to wait until everyone was in to greet you all! I will say it, and I still can't believe it, but the year is fast finishing! So many things had happened this year, not only to me, but I'm sure that to you too... If you want to share your experience with me, I'd like that very much. If not, it's alright too!
Anyway, I had written two piece especially for Christmas, and even if they're dedicated to some people, I don't see why you shouldn't like it either. As always, you can find them in my Christmas' Presents book. Please, R&R. You know the meaning of it.
Also, I want to ask for a favor- more like a poll (up in the profile, poll guys). I've been questioning myself which stories should I write next year, so I decided to leave the decision to you, guys. The two answers with the most votes will be written, as I have to finish and repost Rise of Ouranos as well.
The last thing I want to say is... MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE!!
If you think that the PJO series is the best series ever paste this to your profile.
I promise to remember Percy, Whenever I'm at sea
I promise to remember Annabeth, Whenever a spider comes at me
I promise to protect nature, For Grover's sake of course
I promise to remember Luke, When my heart fills with remorse
I promise to remember Chiron, Whenever I see a sign that says "Free Pony Ride"
I promise to remember Tyson, Whenever a friend says they'll stick by my side
I promise to remember Thalia, Whenever a friend is scared of heights
I promise to remember Clarisse, Whenever I see someone that gives me a fright
I promise to remember Bianca, Whenever I see a sister scold her younger brother
I promise to remember Nico, Whenever I see someone who doesn't get along with others
I promise to remember Zoe, Whenever I watch the stars
I promise to remember Rachel, Whenever a limo passes my car.
Yes I promise to remember PJO, Wherever I may go
Now swear it on the River Styx!
You Know You’re Obsessed With Percy Jackson When…:
• There’s a thunderstorm going on and you scream, “CALM DOWN, ZEUS!”
• Every time you use the Internet, you thank Hermes.
• When you see Harry Potter, you think of Percy with glasses.
• You burn food to see if it smells good.
• You see an owl, you go, “Hi Athena!”
• Everyone else is creating a Twilight family and you create a PJO family.
• You go on a cruise and you hope the boat isn’t The Princess Andromeda…
• You sometimes try to control water.
• You don't read anything but PJO for 3 months.
• You've gone to Google maps and looked up Camp Half-Blood’s address.
• Even though not diagnosed, you claim you have ADHD or dyslexia and blame it on your God parent.
• You yell "Annabeth!" every time you see a NY Yankees hat.
• You make the PJO characters on Sims, as Miis on the Wii, and other video games.
• Anytime you see an orange shirt, you look at the front of it to see if it is a Camp shirt.
• You are a PJO character for Halloween.
• Recite lines randomly from the books.
• When you see/hear about anything myhtology-related, you talk about how it was in PJO (what page, book, etc.) and what happened to it.
• Buy anything New York or San Francisco-related.
• You are suddenly obsessed with Adidas shoes because they have the Hermes symbol.
• You claim that Percy IS real and lives in New York no matter how much your friends argue with you.
• You have dreams about PJO characters/events
• You carry a ballpoint pen in your pocket.
• That everytime you pick up a pen, you think it'll turn into a sword.
• In the beginning of your first History class, you burst out "Will we be studying Greek mythology?!"
• You pretend (or actually) faint when someone asks "Who's Percy?"
• When someone mentions the name Percy (like Percy Weasley) you scream "JACKSON!"
• You are known to scream names of the characters at random times.
• You've got any copy of any book in all your backpacks/binders incase of emergencies .
• You make a list of characters never to anger, like this one and why:
Thalia- Want her for your friend, hate her for your enemy. also shes a hunter, her aim with an arrow is very accurate...
Athena- She scares Percy more than Zeus. Also, she cannot be distracted and her plans always work.
Hades- Um, this one is rather obvious- also you might not be buried with a drachma in your pocket.
Hermes- Cutting off your internet access would be slow and painful torture. Also I blame the economy crisis on Luke's stealing federal funds.
Aphrodite- She's preoccupied with Percabeth and trust me I dont want to waste her time!
• You write fanfiction constantly, even when you're not at your computer.
• You give all your siblings god parents.
• You call the "Ares kids", or school bullies, Martians.
• You quiz fellow fans on the minor gods and win.
• You spend time doing pointless research at , just because Rick Riordan linked it on his site.
• You still think 'Thuke' could happen.
• You plan several statements to avoid Apollo's lines and remember he's a player, should he ever hit on you, and several ways to get out of being cursed.
• You imagine the gods alone, and what they really do on the Superbowl.
• Your mother thinks you need to get a boyfriend, (as does your father) to cure your obsession.
• You read page 203 of BotL over and over again or say the lines in your head
• You know exactly what someone means when they say LT, SoM, TC, BotL, tLO PJO and use it in conversations.
• You find yourself saying things like "Oh my gods!" and "What the Hades?"
• When your boyfriend dumps you, you take the oath of the hunters
• you go to the empire state building and ask for the 600th floor. when the dude at the desk looks at you wierd,you announce that your a demigod.
• you put in grey contacts and pretend that you are Annabeth
• you curse out the gods when something bad happens.
• you watch the movie and read the book every chance you get.
• you claim that you are a demigod and need to go to camp in new york.
• you go to new york and ask for a man named chiron and that you need to go with him.
• you look for a latin teacher that is in a wheelchair and loves to throw greek field days.
• you try to find rachel and ask her for a prophecy.
• every-time a major water storm or earthquake happens you scream at Poseidon
• every-time somthing or someone dies that you are close to, you blame hades.
• you talk about them nonstop.
• You’re in a running/swimming race and you’re praying and sacrificing to Hermes/Poseidon.
• You think that your favorite singer is a child of Apollo.
• Someone close to you dies and you give them money just in case…
• You’re on a boat and you pray that Poseidon is in a good mood.
• You’re in the air (hang-gliding, cliff-diving, bungee jumping, flying, in a plane, etc.) and you hope Zeus is in a good mood and won’t blast you out of the air.
• You go to Aunty Em’s and say you’re camera shy.
• You find your true love and thank Aphrodite for sending him/her to you.
• You think George Bush is a son of Ares
• You know Muse is the best singers. (Get it, the Nine Muses??)
• Bring a blue plastic hairbrush with you everywhere.
• When it gets really cold randomly, blame Kronos.
• You get really mad at Hades when a family member dies
• Every-time you play dodgeball, you bring a suit of armor.
• You go to San Fransisco looking for the Old Sea Man.
• Whenever your internet slows down, you yell at the sky and say "HERMES! WHY DO YOU LOVE ANNOYING ME?!"
• You pray to Athena when you don’t study for a test.
• And when you flunk said test, you blame her irritation on Percabeth.
• You want Hephaestus to fix your iPod when it breaks.
• When someone gets married, you say: "I hope you shall not anger Hera"
• You cried when you finished TLO
• You eat, sleep, and breath Percabeth
• Every school book you own has PJO stuff scribbled on each page
• You're in love with a fictional character
• You and your BFF call yourselves geeks because you sit around and talk about PJO
• You own homemade replicas of things from the PJO series
• You dream of going to Camp Half-Blood
• You buy everything you see with an owl or trident on it.
• You yell “Burrito Fight!” whenever you’re in a Mexican restaurant.
• You checked to make sure your vice-principal doesn’t have a tail.
• You know which pages the good parts are on.
• You start hearing Percabeth in every song you hear.
• You started calling your dog Mrs. O’Leary.
• You start figuring out who your godly parent is.
• You never looked at a ballpoint pen the same way again.
• You ask the cashier at the store if they stock Mythomagic cards.
• You start doing pro/con lists in your head. During Math. When you’re supposed to be taking notes.
• You start spelling character names out of your spelling words.
• You start loving blue plastic hairbrushes and anyone who wields them.
• Each day you check every fan site you know of for new information.
• You try to figure out how much food dye you need to turn chocolate chip cookies blue.
• You make references to it in school reports and/or to friends that haven’t read it.
• The first thing you ask someone when you meet them is, “Have you read PJO?”
• On your trip to Washington D.C. you thought of Annabeth every time you saw a monument.
• You yell “Mizzenmast!” whenever you enter a boat.
• You have one (Or more) pictures relating to PJO in your room
• You know PJO better then most sane people
• You have links to every great PJO site
• You add things to the list every day
• You know what you would do if you were Percy
• You argue with your friends about if Nico should turn evil or not
• At least half of your friends have read all the PJO, or are going to in the very near future
• You wish you could find a rainbow to see if Iris messages work
• For April Fools, you put a piece of paper over a card/cards and told your friends that they were Myth-O-Magic cards and they understood
• Your friends all have a godly parent, and so do you, and your family, and your extended family, and your far, far, far away cuzs'
• You are trying to learn Greek
• You keep thinking about one of the PJO books when you go on a trip.
• Every language you know is some form of Ancient greek.
• You shriek everytime you see a guy with black hair and green eyes
• You have an instant crush on Nico!
• You just have to research more about greek mythology
• You call up the Camp Half Blood number in LT.
• About 75/100 of your fics are PJO related, even if it is a cross over
• You have taken every test you can find about what demigodly parent you would/do/should have, and your friends have as well or are going to
• You make sure all of your friends (Or most of them), have an idea about what you say when talking about PJO
• Your friends (At least one), think you are obsessed with PJO, and you agree
• A friend (or more), think you should start taking pills and/or going to a mental doctor, because you are so obsessed
• You have something on your school things (Or home things), that says 'Daughter/son of God/goddess', and you don't even try to hide it, even if it says daughter of Name of unliked god/goddess
• You’re nodding and smiling when you read this
• You have done at least 15 (Or more) of the above things
• You want to learn Latin
• You copy/paste this onto your profile
If you have/had a crush on a book, anime, or game character, then copy and post this into your profile.
If you actually take the time to read people's profiles, copy this into your profile.
If you think that writing or reading Fanfic stories is fun and addicting, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever cried when your favorite character in a book, movie, or TV show died, copy this onto your profile.
If you talk back to the TV (often quite loudly), copy this into your profile.
All the good ones are either gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.
Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you' re just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have YOU...If you want this kind of guy, copy and paste this into your profile.
A Cute Relationship
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Girl: Do you like me?
Girl: Do you want me?
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Girl: Would you live for me?
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Girl: Choose: me or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...
- The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
- The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
- The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
- The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
- The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
- The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
- The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile.
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up.
He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK.
"But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN. When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Post this on your profile if you hate racism.
1F Y0U C4N UND3R574ND 7H15 M355463 C0PY 17 4ND P4573 17 1N70 Y0UR PR0F1L3
Olny fteefin prenect of poelpe can raed this. If you are one fo taht prenect, cpoy and pstae tihs itno yuor porflie.
Comebacks to crappy pickup lines!-(Hilarious)
Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."
Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy:
Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing".
Man: "Your body is like a temple."
Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."
Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."
Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there?
Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"
Man: "Your place or mine?"
Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."
Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."
Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."
Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."
Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not Enter"
Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman: "Unfertilized !"
Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason"
Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"
Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Perhaps. I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."
Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."
Man: "Is this seat empty?"
Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."
Man: "Where have you been all my life?"
Woman: "Hiding from you."
Man: "If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together."
Woman: "Really, I'd put F and U together."
Man: "Your eyes they're amazing."
Woman: "Seeing your back would be pretty amazing."
I love my mother because...
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE: "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION: "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL: "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC: "Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC:"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT: "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY: "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS: "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM: "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA: "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER: "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY: "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE: "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION: "Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY: "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION: "Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING: "You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE: "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP: "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR: "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT: "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS: "You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS: "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM: "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE: "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"
What a guy means, when he says some stuff-
"You know how bad my memory is!”: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop,' the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned…but I forgot your birthday"
“Oh, don’t fuss, I just cut myself, it’s not big deal”: "I have actually severed a limb but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt"
“Take a breath honey. You work too hard": "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner"
"It‘s a guy thing": "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical"
"Can I help with dinner?": "Why isn't it already on the table?"
"It would take too long to": "I have no idea how it works"
"I can't find it": "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless"
Lizzy Dane (2)