The Scheming Turtle
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Joined 06-08-14, id: 5787419, Profile Updated: 05-20-18
Author has written 3 stories for Hetalia - Axis Powers, Supernatural, X-Men: The Movie, and Lucifer.

I like talking about Transformers, Marvel, Hetalia, music and other things so feel free to PM me. I'm a friendly person (usually) who enjoys chatting with new people and making new friends. Beware of ridiculous levels of awkward though.


Story and Update News

I'm on DeviantArt; it's TheSchemingTurtle.

I've moved away from fanfiction recently so I can focus on my books in progress. So it might be a while before I write fanfic again.

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Strange Things About America by nicetwin123 reviews
There are many strange things that Americans do. So of course, the rest of the world can't help but get confused. Multi-chapter story about how different nations deal with the strange, annoying, and insane things Americans do.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 122 - Words: 169,416 - Reviews: 2784 - Favs: 1,436 - Follows: 1,247 - Updated: 4/12 - Published: 8/4/2015 - America
I'm Not Cut Out For This Thing Called Life by Blackgate Transfer reviews
Bucky decides and Steve comes to terms with it. Post-Captain America: Civil War.
Captain America - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 556 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/13/2016 - Steve R./Capt. America, Bucky B./Winter Soldier, T'Challa/Black Panther - Complete
Mutually Assured Destruction by the moon and the stars reviews
"It's fascinating, isn't it? Human nature. Take something off the table and suddenly, no matter what it is, it becomes irresistible." / In which Chloe's reluctant to take a partner, and Lucifer's reluctant to let her off the hook. Post-1x01. One shot.
Lucifer - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,448 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 198 - Follows: 93 - Published: 1/28/2016 - Chloe D., Lucifer M. - Complete
The birth of the platypus by Doctor Sigma reviews
During the time God created Earth, he let his archangels create their own animals. This is what Gabriel did in a fit of imagination.
Supernatural - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 571 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 20 - Published: 1/6/2016 - Chuck S./God, Lucifer, Gabriel, Michael - Complete
Card Games from Mortal Dames by Blackgate Transfer reviews
Because they don't really fight that much if Loki isn't being naughty. Spoilers for the first movie, plus a minor-ish for Ultron.
Thor - Rated: T - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 509 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/16/2015 - Thor, Loki - Complete
That Kid Will Be the Death of Him by Blackgate Transfer reviews
In which Dean resents his little brother until he can't.
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 435 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/6/2015 - Sam W., Dean W. - Complete
Our Strange and Wonderful World by nicetwin123 reviews
The world we live in is strange. So of course i'm going to write about it. Join the nations as they discover just how strange the world really is.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 987 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 9/17/2015 - Published: 9/7/2015
Betta Splendens by 2211Nighthawk reviews
"What is this?" Jazz straightened, glancing at the bowl, his grin still in place. "Tha' Prowler," he said, returning his gaze to Prowl's "is ah Betta splendens. Also known as ah-" "Siamese fighting fish or a betta fish." Prowl finished. "I know what it is, why is it on my desk?" cute oneshot that popped into my head. G1 Universe. Prowl centric. Title is scientific name for a betta
Transformers - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,904 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 19 - Published: 10/17/2014 - Complete
Exothermic by ShyLight reviews
G1: So Wheeljack accidentally set Sideswipe on fire once. But it wasn't really fire. And it was sort of Prowl's fault too. (oneshot)
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,873 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 277 - Follows: 52 - Published: 6/22/2013 - Wheeljack, Sideswipe, Prowl, Ratchet - Complete
Anger Management by Molten-Ashes reviews
"If I'm right, something about Tactical Officer's flying off the handle and picking a fight is in data-pad three, page four thousand and twenty two, paragraph four."
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,606 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 218 - Follows: 51 - Published: 5/3/2012 - Prowl - Complete
Semantics by The Starhorse reviews
Prowl says 'potato', and Sideswipe says 'potahto'. You may guess where this is going.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 25,967 - Reviews: 222 - Favs: 480 - Follows: 125 - Updated: 1/20/2012 - Published: 5/1/2007 - Sideswipe, Prowl - Complete
Autobot Officer Meetings by Molten-Ashes reviews
An occasion where a human should run screaming in the opposite direction...
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,313 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 18 - Published: 12/15/2011 - Jazz, Prowl - Complete
The Revenge of the Pillow Pet by TheCrazyBookwormWithALaptop reviews
In Which Octavian keeps receiving death threats from Percy's panda.
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,873 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 7 - Published: 12/10/2011 - Octavian - Complete
Manual Transformation by Molten-Ashes reviews
"Prowl, it says not to use excessive force"
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,829 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 226 - Follows: 37 - Published: 7/9/2011 - Jazz, Prowl - Complete
Tactical Traumatisation by Molten-Ashes reviews
In which Jazz is annoyed, Prowl is sulking and the Twins are traumatised
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,272 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 188 - Follows: 35 - Published: 1/3/2011 - Jazz, Prowl - Complete
A weird language by Kathrinek reviews
Athur really doesn't get the danish language
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,285 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/31/2010 - England/Britain, Denmark - Complete
Punishment by Haluwasa2 reviews
Megatron's got a new way to torture Starscream that's driving the poor Seeker insane. All he wants is for it to stop. G1.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 587 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 9 - Published: 4/12/2010 - Starscream - Complete
Snap, Crackle, Pop by ShyLight reviews
Sideswipe hates teleporting and therefore, by association, hates Skywarp. Sunstreaker unleashes an unholy wrath upon the Decepticon base due to a misunderstanding. No jet packs or GPS systems were harmed in the making of this fic…Beyond repair anyway.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 30,877 - Reviews: 186 - Favs: 460 - Follows: 159 - Updated: 3/18/2010 - Published: 3/16/2008 - Sideswipe, Sunstreaker - Complete
The Ghost by Beregond5 reviews
G1. When he first joined, Mirage wanted nothing to do with the other Autobots. A very persistent mech is about to change that.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,739 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 11 - Published: 2/13/2010 - Mirage, Hound - Complete
The Lost by The Starhorse reviews
A series of lifechanging events involving Sideswipe and Sunstreaker, told from different points of view. Written in 2002, long before it would become painfully obvious that I could have chosen a better title...
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 80,408 - Reviews: 170 - Favs: 324 - Follows: 170 - Updated: 2/9/2010 - Published: 11/28/2007 - Sideswipe, Sunstreaker
I Still Don't Believe You by Night Train reviews
When a new president or prime minister comes to office, one of the first things they usually learn about is the existance of their nation's personification. Usually being the key word. Deanon.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,625 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 556 - Follows: 115 - Published: 12/25/2009 - America - Complete
The Insanity Code by ocean's pebble reviews
“Sunstreaker doesn’t exist, Sideswipe. The sooner you accept that, the better it will go for us all. Don’t you want to be sane again, Sideswipe?” slight AU. Oneshot.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Drama/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,384 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 168 - Follows: 26 - Published: 11/29/2009 - Sunstreaker, Sideswipe - Complete
Geese aren't like Sheep by Tiontah reviews
G1 Oneshot. Sunstreaker and Sideswipe find out that not all Earth-creatures are afraid of them.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 990 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/19/2009 - Sideswipe, Sunstreaker - Complete
Staying Alive: A HowTo by The Starhorse reviews
Rule Number One: Don't ever, ever, EVER stab your commanding officer in the back. Rule Number Two: On the off chance that you ignore Rule Number One, you better run like hell. Far, far away.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 17,699 - Reviews: 125 - Favs: 651 - Follows: 84 - Published: 8/9/2009 - Sideswipe, Sunstreaker - Complete
Project Drive Megatron Insane by Ariel D reviews
Jazz gets captured by the Decepticons and decides to use his time to drive Megatron insane. An unwitting Starscream is more than happy to join in the fun. G1verse.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,578 - Reviews: 113 - Favs: 501 - Follows: 95 - Updated: 6/27/2009 - Published: 5/17/2009 - Megatron, Starscream - Complete
Keep All Limbs Inside the Vehicle At All Times by Arctic Banana reviews
Jazz takes an unfortunate car thief on a homicidal joyride.
Transformers - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,324 - Reviews: 148 - Favs: 575 - Follows: 79 - Published: 12/13/2008 - Jazz - Complete
Burying the Hatchet by ShyLight reviews
In all of the years that Ratchet threatened to rebuild them as different things, Sideswipe and Sunstreaker never would have dreamed that he’d actually follow through. They were careless in battle one too many times and Ratchet intends to teach a lesson
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 27,615 - Reviews: 278 - Favs: 262 - Follows: 240 - Updated: 6/9/2008 - Published: 8/26/2007 - Ratchet, Sideswipe
Let's Talk 'Torture' by cmdrtekk reviews
G1. Soundwave learns why Bluestreak’s chosen designation in English is Bluestreak. Prompt from the Transformers Random Pairing Generator: Soundwave/Bluestreak/Mouth
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 994 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 114 - Follows: 13 - Published: 5/20/2008 - Complete
Grand, Stupid Things by The Starhorse reviews
Sunstreaker's right. Sideswipe really is stupid.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,041 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 181 - Follows: 22 - Published: 2/16/2008 - Complete
Is it a Shindig or a Hootenanny? by ShyLight reviews
G1: During Sideswipe's antics, he causes Prowl’s CPU to crash. In compensation for lack of memory, the tactician’s battle computer takes over. Now Sideswipe, and a handful of bravely stupid Autobots, must try to fix a crazy Prowl as he wages “war”
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 25,019 - Reviews: 230 - Favs: 343 - Follows: 293 - Updated: 10/10/2007 - Published: 7/30/2007 - Prowl
Unexpected friends by Omicron the IceQueen reviews
Sometimes you find a friend in the oddest of beings. G1 Sunstreaker one shot.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 592 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 6 - Published: 5/22/2007 - Chip C., Sunstreaker - Complete
The Color Purple by Red Tale reviews
G1 When Bumblebee is injured in battle, Spike has to get a ride from a different yellow autobot. And somehow that leads to the color purple. Sunstreaker and Spike how many people put these two together…nobody, right?
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,483 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 9 - Published: 2/14/2007 - Complete
Prisoner by Purple Aussie reviews
G1. Thundercracker, Autobot POW.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,876 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 12 - Published: 10/9/2006 - Complete
Ratchet's Runaround by Purple Aussie reviews
G1. Ratchet needs Prowl for just fifteen lousy astrominutes. Easier said than done...
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,808 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 258 - Follows: 36 - Published: 7/21/2006 - Complete
Blue 42 by The Starhorse reviews
Beware of irritating Prowl. It does not pay.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 14,295 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 484 - Follows: 58 - Published: 6/16/2006 - Complete
Just the Cat's Meow by The Starhorse reviews
No one ever remembers to watch out for Jazz.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,715 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 399 - Follows: 59 - Published: 6/8/2006 - Complete
Rain Over Blue Water by The Starhorse reviews
Some days you just lose your cool and bite some heads off. Sideswipe is no exception.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16,567 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 350 - Follows: 45 - Published: 6/6/2006 - Complete
Sunrise, Sunset by Purple Aussie reviews
G1. Prowl, forced into having a day off, has no idea what to do with himself.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,748 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 284 - Follows: 39 - Published: 5/25/2005
Jazz 1, Prowl 0 by Purple Aussie reviews
G1. Just a little Jazz and Prowl story.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,235 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 135 - Follows: 27 - Published: 11/14/2004
Why The Ark Has No Doors by Princess Artemis reviews
It has been asked why the Autobots never tried to make the Ark more secure. Well...they did. It just didn't work out as planned. G1
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,562 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 8 - Published: 3/19/2003 - Wheeljack - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Déjà Vu reviews
Peter tells Erik and gets the sense of déjà vu at his reaction.
X-Men: The Movie - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 982 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 23 - Published: 6/3/2016 - Erik L./Magneto, Quicksilver/Peter M., Ms. Maximoff - Complete
Hetalia's Rejected Princesses reviews
They're the Rejected Princesses; the amazing women from either history or myth who were too bad, awesome, murderous, or mysterious for their own good. And, throughout the years, sometimes, they encountered their countries. Based off of and inspired by the website Rejected Princesses.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,971 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 3/10/2016 - Published: 7/15/2015
Two Sides of the Same Coin reviews
Lucifer and Lucifer have a little chat.
Crossover - Supernatural & Lucifer - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 532 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 132 - Follows: 68 - Published: 3/8/2016 - Lucifer, Lucifer M. - Complete