wardlyman
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Joined 06-22-14, id: 5835091, Profile Updated: 08-19-20

Reading in the twilight fandom is such a chore...

Reason#1 The cheat fics. So cliche, and always Edward. The most annoying is WHEN they have canon Edward cheat. 10000% unbelievable, if anything, Bella is the one that would cheat cause she was the horny fucking human. On top of that, 94% of them is Edward doing the dirty deed. But I guess I shouldn't be surprised at this since I am reading shit created by majority female..

#2 Nearly all female writers, I suppose this could be a major reason why I have headaches sometimes when reading in the femdom. It's not a problem really, but once you read enough of the same things, you begin to get annoyed with recurring things... Like groveling, it's 100% of the time Edward. Over dramatic female characters that don't get put in their place... Even in fics where Bella is in the wrong, Edward would still end up groveling or begging for forgiveness or whatever, it's utterly annoying. If SHE fucked up, SHE should fix it, but instead it's always Edward that makes moves to mend HER fuck up. That's unrealistic and annoying.

Then you have the fact that nearly all of the Edward's are so unrealistic that you know this person would never be real. And in those cheat fics, Edward cheats for absolute no reason in most of them. Like their relationship is roses but he just cheats... for what? Most of the time, no fucking reason. While in the few Bella cheat fics, she has every reason under the sun.

#3 Over dramatics, if you read Twilight fiction, this is self explanatory. But just in case.. Imagine your boyfriend/girlfriend curling in a ball on the floor, crying, cause you nicked your finger a little. THEN, they go on for a few days constantly bringing up how you 'hurt' yourself while crying over it each time. That's the type of over dramatic's you will find in twi fiction. You will find stories that are like 200-500k words and wonder, how the fuck? This is one of the reasons why, shit will get repetitive and annoying. Tis why I don't read shit over 150k, even withthose, I check reviews first.

#4 Motherfucking over romanticized Edward's. Like most of them are just too fucking lovey dovey to be real. Even the ones that are suppose to be some hardcore killers turn into complete sissies. Don't even get me started on triangles.

#5 Love triangles, along with the the cliche love lines. Most of time, they make Bella look like a complete hussy. THEN in that same fic where she juggling whether to be with Edward or some other dude. The author writes lines like.. 'There's only ever been you!' For Bella... LIKE WHAT? On top of it being cliche, it's a STRAIGHT FUCKING LIE.

So fucking sick of Broken this or that stories... Get original plebs... Use fucking troubled... Misfit or something else... FUCK!

Twilight fandom fascination with having Edward be a passive beta male is disgusting. Guy forcibly kisses Bella, Edward gets angry's, Bella cries for Edward to not hurt the guy... Edward curls in the fetal position while threatening the guy and telling him to leave. THAT'S THE KIND OF BETA SHIT I AM TALKING ABOUT HERE!

Like bruh, there are stories where Bella is straight up sexual assaulted and is saved, and legit nothing happens to the dude that did it, even when he caught by any of the males of that story. SHIT IS INFURIATING!

Most of these stories, Edward is a fucking Beta male that happened to become a vampire.

I wonder sometimes how some stories have so many likes when it has so many negative tropes that I have seen countless reviews say they dislike seeing yet I see stories with 5k likes and follows that are built out of the cliche fucking tropes! I don't fucking get it!

Another thing I hate about Twilight fandom, unaware writing. They'll write shit like Bella telling Edward something tragic like her getting raped or losing a baby, then write about him getting aroused... LIKE WHAT THE FUCK! HELLO! THAT'S DISGUSTING!

A recent one I READ that's really unaware was a writer trying to write canon Edward... And has him fuck bella for the first time who had just been in a serious accident... CANON Edward... WHAT? He won't fuck her normally thinking he will hurt her and what not but will fuck her when she is in actual pain no matter what he does??? That's fucking asinine and pure unaware retarded writing.

These long distance relationship break up fics... Are utterly retarded, each one of them. I can see early 2000's or in the 1900's somewhere... But 2008 and up, the excuse of 'it doesn't work' just fucking doesn't apply, especially 2012 and up, cause then, you just don't want a fucking relationship at this point.

And THEN they are seperated for like 5 or more years in these fics.. like what... Ok, let's say they shift through college, WHAT'S stopping them from reconnecting then? If they still are so in love with their HS sweetheart? And in some of them.. THEY LIVE IN DIFFERENT STATES when they get back together so really.. in the fucking end, they do a LONG DISTANCE relationship ANYWAY!

FOR once, I'd like to read a Edward Bella long distance college relationship where they make it work like so many REAL people do in REAL life. Especially in this day and age, their is no excuse.

Bella being selfish is never a issue in this fandom, and when it is brought up, it's flimsily reasoned away without a argument.

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Hold Me Down by periwrites reviews
Not me. That's who this girl is. She is not me. And for the first time, Edward wants someone who is not me. The tequila sits at the bottom of my stomach and begins to grow tentacles. I am tequila brave.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 17 - Words: 48,924 - Reviews: 1579 - Favs: 1,620 - Follows: 1,743 - Updated: 12/2/2013 - Published: 3/22/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
My Other Half by Christobel Cullen reviews
Bella is a student at the University of Alaska. She's fiercely independent, but everything changes when she meets a stranger who refuses to leave her side. This story explores the subject of vampire mating. AU
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 30 - Words: 60,976 - Reviews: 2096 - Favs: 2,551 - Follows: 1,105 - Updated: 10/16/2011 - Published: 3/4/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
I Messed My Panties by SassenachWench reviews
One-shot. Contest Entry for "The Most Shitteous Craptastic Cuddlecock Crack Contest 2009". I vomited a little as I wrote this. Seriously.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Parody/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,514 - Reviews: 228 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 23 - Published: 12/25/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Sleeping to Dream by Somah reviews
The newspapers say it all: Bella Swan is dead. But no one is sure why she jumped from the cliffs at First Beach. No one really knows why her body wasn't ever found. But everyone knows her coffin is empty and that the Cullens are back.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 26 - Words: 68,471 - Reviews: 881 - Favs: 1,265 - Follows: 570 - Updated: 1/30/2009 - Published: 7/16/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete