Jamocha a.k.a. Bella
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Joined 06-18-04, id: 612701

Pretty soon, I'll some stories up. It's summer, and when I walk outside, I would prefer to sit next to an open oven. So I will def. have time to post some stories. =)

Oh, and I love quotes, subtle romance with a lot of comedy, so if you know of any good ones, in almost any movie, book, or tv show section, message me. =)

ILY people!! (kind of)

Quotes:

Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, ''Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?'' When Mary didn't stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. ''God Almighty !'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good'' and Mary fell back to sleep. A while later the teacher asked Mary, ''Who is our Lord and Savior?'' But Mary didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. ''Jesus Christ!'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good,'' and Mary fell back to sleep. Then the teacher asked Mary a third question, ''What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?'' And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time Mary jumped up and shouted, ''If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!'' The Teacher fainted. -Funnyjunk.com

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else. -Will Rogers

If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style. -Quentin Crisp

Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance or a stranger. -Franklin P. Jones

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it. -W.C. Fields

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it? -Steven Wright

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die. -Mel Brooks

Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are driving taxi cabs and cutting hair. -George Burns

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets, the more interested he is in her. -Agatha Christie

Money can't buy you friends, but you get a better class of enemy. -Spike Milligan

Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight. -George Globol

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished 2 bags of M&M's and a chocolate cake. I feel better already. -Dave Barry

The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. -Dave Barry

Don't be distracted by criticism. Remember-the only taste of success some people have when they take a bite out of you. -Zig Ziglar

A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on. -Sir Winston Churchill

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. -Erma Bombeck

You should always go to other people's funerals, otherwise, they won't come to yours. -Yogi Berra

We are here on Earth to do good to others. What the others are here for, I don't know. -W H Auden

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. -Fred Allen

When you know the right answers, nobody asks you the right questions.

Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily as lying down. -Woody Allen

I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens. -Woody Allen

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman? -Woody Allen

Life is wasted on the living. -Douglas Adams

The knack of flying is learning to throw yourself at the ground and miss. -Douglas Adams

I don't believe it. Prove it to me and I still won't believe it. -Douglas Adams

I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons. -Douglas Adams

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions? -Scott Adams

"Ugly?What mean ugly?""It means your face would frighten small children!" -Dragonball Z

"Don't call me stupid." "Oh, right. To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people. I've known sheep that could outwit you! I've worn dresses with higher IQs!" -A Fish Called Wanda

"You ever met anyone you didn't kill?" "Well I haven't killed you yet..." -Lethal Weapon

"You know how to use that thing?" pointing to the sword "Sure.. The pointy end goes into the other guy." -The Mask of Zorro

"So what do you need, besides a miracle?" "Guns. Lots of guns." -The Matrix

"Dave: Have you ever heard the expression "When life gives you lemons make lemonade?" Bill: And have you ever heard the expression when life gives you lemons make lemonade and throw it in the face of the guy who gave you the lemons till he gives you the oranges you asked for?" -News Radio

"It's not that I'm lazy. I just don't care. It's a problem of motivation." -Office Space

There is no I in team but there is a M, and an E -Darkshadow-23

There is only two type of pedestrians. The quick ones and the flat ones. -Happynutcase or Qk I forget things

A really funny picture/joke is at: http://www.funnyjunk.com/p/santa_sucks-jpg.html

http://www.livejournal.com/users/agonyrocks/

http://www.mediaminer.org/user_info.php/96795

http://www.fictionpress.com/~jamochaakabella

http://agonyrocks.deviantart.com/

http://funfreepages.com/dubdub/

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Diary of an Undercover Sue by Hirilnara reviews
An ISPCE spin off, based on a new theory that fangirls are not created as a story is posted, but that they are being trained in some school. Watch what happens when one poor agent gets sent in undercover!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 48,283 - Reviews: 325 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 7/22/2013 - Published: 11/26/2003
YuGiOh! and the Holy Grail by Almighty Shadowchan reviews
The YGO cast attempts to recreated Monty Python's Holy Grail. They are failing miserably. Rated for cursing, MontyPythonness and Yami Marik. Enjoy!
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 13 - Words: 32,469 - Reviews: 132 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 10/26/2009 - Published: 10/19/2004
What Doesn't Kill You by Azurite reviews
Téa Gardner lost everything in a single night: her home, her family, her very livelihood. Of all people to help her in this time of need, Seto Kaiba is the one to give her another chance. CH26 NOW UP!
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 527,886 - Reviews: 1459 - Favs: 707 - Follows: 312 - Updated: 4/5/2009 - Published: 10/9/2003 - Anzu M., S. Kaiba
Duocam by BobisLove reviews
Duo got a hold of a video camera. Will anyone survive? He goes around and plays pranks on his fellow pilots, recording them and eventually their reactions. Updated at last! -Story is now complete-
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 7,865 - Reviews: 298 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 8/16/2008 - Published: 3/10/2002 - Duo M. - Complete
The New Students by White Angel Chan reviews
YGO/HP crossover, as promised. Yugi, Ryou, and Malik are invited to Hogwarts; however, dark forces have discovered the existance of the millennium items and plot to use them for their own means...
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 45 - Words: 207,182 - Reviews: 4610 - Favs: 1,457 - Follows: 724 - Updated: 8/8/2008 - Published: 11/30/2002
Second Chance by Striking Falcon reviews
Sesshoumaru, Lord of the Western Lands, is betrothed to a miko with a dark side. When Sesshoumaru declares in front of the wedding party that he doesn’t love the miko, she curses him. Fast forward to 2003, when Kagome is driving home from work. She a
Inuyasha - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 40 - Words: 249,615 - Reviews: 4355 - Favs: 2,623 - Follows: 1,221 - Updated: 8/5/2008 - Published: 9/13/2003 - Sesshomaru, Kagome H.
Once Upon a Freakin' Time by Evadne reviews
The Death Eaters attempt to do bad things, but mostly just do things badly.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 40 - Words: 29,923 - Reviews: 1959 - Favs: 2,032 - Follows: 691 - Updated: 2/15/2008 - Published: 8/7/2002 - Voldemort, Severus S.
Mission X by Sailor Janus reviews
The Gundam Wing Pilots' newest mission force them to become the worst thing possible....a Boy Band! Oh the horror! How will they ever survive? Pure insanity is a definite!
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 54,250 - Reviews: 182 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 1/2/2008 - Published: 5/15/2001
Who Says Konoha is Peaceful? by Almighty Shadowchan reviews
Naruto and Sasuke find and read Sakura's diary. Sakura wonders why they are now acting weird around her, and she comes up with a bizarre conclusion, which she shares with everybody. Can the guys save their reputations without suffering her wrath?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 26,708 - Reviews: 348 - Favs: 181 - Follows: 210 - Updated: 8/7/2007 - Published: 8/14/2006 - Naruto U., Sasuke U.
Fire Behind Blue Eyes by bluetarako reviews
Zuko's temper is legendary, but his new prisoner is beating him at his own game. What will happen when he is outmatched by a stupid waterbender? [Zutara] COMPLETE!
Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 37 - Words: 142,533 - Reviews: 1012 - Favs: 489 - Follows: 168 - Updated: 3/28/2007 - Published: 8/6/2006 - Zuko, Katara - Complete
Fangs of Love by LuvinAniManga reviews
AU Anzu couldn't believe it when she ended up at a school with an entire student body of young MEN. There's a dark secret about the boys... Can she figure it out, or will she be too caught up in flirting and love?
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 92,786 - Reviews: 659 - Favs: 215 - Follows: 146 - Updated: 1/5/2007 - Published: 4/21/2005 - Anzu M.
The Art of Deception by PetitDejeuner reviews
She's afraid to love. He thinks loving is a distraction. What happens when they're on a mission where they have to act like they're engaged? [NejiSaku]
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 21,712 - Reviews: 270 - Favs: 308 - Follows: 133 - Updated: 7/31/2006 - Published: 6/13/2006 - Neji H., Sakura H. - Complete
Youkai in the Caribbean! by Draconic Ban-Sidhe reviews
PotCxInu Naraku has been defeated, but the last shard is still lost...until Inuyasha, Kagome and Sesshoumaru who's been dragged along for the ride go to the Caribbean, where Jack has a shard...as one of his hair ornaments!
Crossover - Inuyasha & Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 28 - Words: 122,698 - Reviews: 364 - Favs: 210 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 7/12/2006 - Published: 1/23/2004 - Capt. Jack Sparrow - Complete
The Game of Go by sessha-chan reviews
Naruto and Sasuke, highranking ANBU have taken a contract. Their mission: to protect Harry Potter and the inhabitants of Hogwarts at all costs. And if possible kill Voldemort while they're at it. Sounds like they're in for a long year. noyaoi. complete.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 31,965 - Reviews: 571 - Favs: 1,413 - Follows: 376 - Updated: 6/18/2006 - Published: 6/3/2006 - Naruto U. - Complete
Mind Reader by Soul of Insanity reviews
[COMPLETE] After a battle with Akki, a demon squirrel, Kagome gains the ability to read minds. How will this play a part in the fight against Naraku and a new ally? But more importantly, how on earth will Kagome stay sane after reading her friend's minds?
Inuyasha - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 35 - Words: 138,531 - Reviews: 1947 - Favs: 539 - Follows: 136 - Updated: 4/14/2006 - Published: 3/23/2004 - Complete
To Heaven or Hell by C.Queen reviews
An assassin must earn the right to go to heaven but the problem is she has to do it in the body of the Gboys' new pet cat. Poor kitty? Try poor boys.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 32 - Words: 108,628 - Reviews: 501 - Favs: 193 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 1/20/2006 - Published: 3/21/2003 - Quatre W., Trowa B./No-Name - Complete
Mission X by Kurome Shiretsu reviews
YYH Xmen Evolution crossover. Yuusuke, Kurama, and Hiei pose as mutants and team up with the Xmen in an attempt to stop a mutant uprising headed by a powerful demon. Can the Reikai Tantei keep their demon heritages secret from the mutant world?
Yu Yu Hakusho - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 84,556 - Reviews: 2814 - Favs: 1,432 - Follows: 700 - Updated: 12/13/2005 - Published: 11/2/2003 - Yusuke U.
BA2: The Sequel by Shadow Jaganshi reviews
New fanatics, new setting, new bishies, and a mistake that causes a nice big problem for everyone and their aunties. And especially Karasu, but I don't think he has any aunties. HieixOC KuramaxOC
Anime X-overs - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 65,569 - Reviews: 238 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 12/13/2005 - Published: 9/27/2005
Set In Stone by The SOC Puppet reviews
AU. When the Leaf Village abandoned Naruto to die as a baby, the last thing they expected was for him to come back as a shinobi – and perhaps an enemy.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 39,965 - Reviews: 618 - Favs: 853 - Follows: 776 - Updated: 7/24/2005 - Published: 2/13/2004
School Sucks by Shadow Jaganshi reviews
Due to a bet, Shadow and Hiei are back in school. Doom ensues. But that's not the only focus of this fic. Relationships flourish. We'll leave it there.
Yu Yu Hakusho - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 32 - Words: 268,854 - Reviews: 1135 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 7/18/2005 - Published: 1/14/2005 - Hiei, Kurama M.
In The Shadows of Psychics and Wizards by I Saw Shino's Face reviews
Yana,Kido,Kaitou,Sniper,and SeaMan. They were the first at Hogwarts. Thanks to Itsuki's illness and evil wizards, certain demons are there as well. Ch12 UP!
Yu Yu Hakusho - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 82,819 - Reviews: 233 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 6/11/2005 - Published: 9/17/2004 - Yanagisawa M., Kido A.
The Guide's Entry On FanFiction by JuicyFrood reviews
How ironic...
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 298 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/11/2005
Random Days by Shinigami Miya Mizu reviews
Ch. 7 is up! These are just random days out of the g- boys lives. Just read and tell me what you think.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,598 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 3/18/2005 - Published: 5/22/2004
A Mary Sue Alphabet by Irony-chan reviews
A's for Amanda Our hero's twin sister Got lost as a baby and Gosh, how he missed her...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,497 - Reviews: 2636 - Favs: 6,251 - Follows: 396 - Published: 1/12/2005 - Complete
The Awakening by Sutoriitoenzeru-Street Angel reviews
After her aunt's sudden death Anzu is left to inherit the mansion the old lady left her. Little does Anzu know she's descended form a long line of famous slayers and spellcasters so when she releases the four vampires sealed in the basement. Oh what to do
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 40,012 - Reviews: 262 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 1/2/2005 - Published: 8/24/2004 - Anzu M., Yami Marik - Complete
Twelve Days of Torture by Dragonslayer527 reviews
[COMPLETE]Twelve days before Christmas Raven receives a gift from a secret admirer. And another the next day. And the next. Who's the admirer? [Raven x ]
Teen Titans - Rated: T - English - Romance/Mystery - Chapters: 12 - Words: 26,415 - Reviews: 791 - Favs: 332 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 12/21/2004 - Published: 12/1/2004 - Raven - Complete
Kidnap Mufasa's Son by OttseloftheAges reviews
This is Nightmare Before Christmas' "Kidnap the Sandy Claws' sung by Lock, Shock, and Barrel, but redone to be sung by our favorite hyena trio about Mufasa's son (obviously). Kinda humorous I guess. No flaming! RR!
Lion King - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 680 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/7/2004
Drei by Mieren reviews
Forge tried to help Kurt with his teleportation range again. Something went wrong... (Note: This may get *very* weird.)
X-Men: Evolution - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 11,541 - Reviews: 138 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 9/8/2004 - Published: 5/22/2003
What isn't nailed down is mine by Kasumi Koorime reviews
Come with Ed and me as we go through different animes stealing stuff: School is in session this time! Madness insured! Beware the hazards of the food fight, Sporks are a deadly weapon! Apparently so is Jello...
Anime X-overs - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 112,936 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/29/2004 - Published: 9/22/2003
Queen of the Damned by belle-fille1 reviews
Angsty fic with Tea. Not the usual story of Tea . . .this time she's different . . . I know, I know haven't updated for a very long time, but I just did! See!
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 15,648 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 6/25/2004 - Published: 8/11/2003
Artemis Fowl: The Ivory Files by Nyghtvision reviews
Just what it says on the label: Humor. Suspense. Flamingos. A strange visitor from Japan. The Dark Side of the Tooth Fairy. Plot should thicken to the consistency of tiramisu. Add a pinch of Bob, bake for an hour and read.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 16 - Words: 75,758 - Reviews: 422 - Favs: 91 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 6/14/2004 - Published: 1/19/2003
SNAPE'S PROPOSAL LETTER FOR THE DARK ARTS by Sarah Noble reviews
He sends in an application every year...but what does it SAY?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 10,405 - Reviews: 161 - Favs: 247 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 4/24/2004 - Published: 11/3/2003 - Severus S.
Ghost by dragonslayer123 reviews
(alternate universe) Kagome is a ghost that is sent to haunt the Inu mansion for 100 years. there she meets the one person who can see her. . . INUYASHA!
Inuyasha - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 23,720 - Reviews: 245 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 4/4/2004 - Published: 2/19/2003 - Inuyasha, Kagome H.
I Hate Americans aka Duo by Mieren reviews
What happens when you have more than one Maxwell? Besides Wufei going insane, that is. This is a jab at Duo, so please don't flame.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 18 - Words: 53,586 - Reviews: 282 - Favs: 128 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 1/30/2004 - Published: 11/22/2002
The Artemis Fowl Fan Fic Academy by Spectra16 reviews
Crazy . . . All the Artemis Fowl fan fic writer's go to one school. Everyone is reminded of their past! Ms. Anonymity is confronted. Flamers welcome to read and see what you've been mistaking yourself for.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 18,922 - Reviews: 129 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/25/2004 - Published: 10/23/2003 - Complete
Who's on First? by Dragonflyr reviews
When Hiei gets suckered into being the head of the sports department at Kurama's school, he soon finds out that just getting the player's names straight is more than he bargained for. Please R&R. reposted to fix grammar mistakes that were bugging me.
Yu Yu Hakusho - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,535 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 1/18/2004 - Published: 1/17/2004 - Complete
YuGiOh School Project by Tasha3 reviews
The gang reunite at Isis' house, only to get their fair share of each other. What's even worst now, is the semester project, "Get to know your class mate." Worst enemies are now going to be closest buddies, or die trying... (TB IsisYami)
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 117,311 - Reviews: 892 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 1/13/2004 - Published: 8/19/2003
The Hogwarts Fanfiction Academy by Meir Brin reviews
**Complete!** Welcome to HFA, a school for fanfiction writers of the Harry Potter designation. Yet who would have the courage to teach such a motley bunch? Why the Harry Potter characters themselves, of course! (A Miss Cam-authorized OFU)
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 50 - Words: 79,887 - Reviews: 869 - Favs: 473 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 7/17/2003 - Published: 9/26/2002 - Complete
Mainstream Lament: YuGiOh by Animagess reviews
To anyone has has ever winced at Yugi's dub voice...To anyone who has laughed derisively at Tristan's name...To anyone who has signed a petition requesting WB to release YGO uncut... This one's for you. On an added note... Reviews are excruciatingly good.
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 522 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/17/2003
Nine Men And A Little Lady by Kielle reviews
Once upon a time a mysterious girl joined the Fellowship...damn her! Sick of annoying Mary Sues? Actually READ Tolkien? This may cheer you up.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,725 - Reviews: 1221 - Favs: 2,150 - Follows: 196 - Published: 1/8/2002
Blue's Revenge! by Commander reviews
Blue hasn't been acting normal lately, and she tells the idiotic Steve what she's up to by using Blue's Clues!
Blue's Clues - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,762 - Reviews: 118 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 5 - Published: 7/23/2001 - Complete
A Female Otaku’s Lament by Just a Thought reviews
For all us girls who found the perfect man...drawn on a piece of paper.
Misc. Anime/Manga - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 117 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/18/2001
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