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Spiffy Quotes

Sir Bedevere: There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
Peasant 1: Are there? Oh well, tell us.
Sir Bedevere: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
Peasant 1: Burn them.
Sir Bedevere: And what do you burn, apart from witches?
Peasant 1: More witches.
Peasant 2: Wood.
Sir Bedevere: Good. Now, why do witches burn?
Peasant 3: ...because they're made of... wood?
Sir Bedevere: Good. So how do you tell whether she is made of wood?
Peasant 1: Build a bridge out of her.
Sir Bedevere: But can you not also build bridges out of stone?
Peasant 1: Oh yeah.
Sir Bedevere: Does wood sink in water?
Peasant 1: No, no, it floats!... It floats! Throw her into the pond!
Sir Bedevere: No, no. What else floats in water?
Peasant 1: Bread.
Peasant 2: Apples.
Peasant 3: Very small rocks.
Peasant 1: Cider.
Peasant 2: Gravy.
Peasant 3: Cherries.
Peasant 1: Mud.
Peasant 2: Churches.
Peasant 3: Lead! Lead!
King Arthur: A Duck.
Sir Bedevere: ...Exactly. So, logically...
Peasant 1: If she weighed the same as a duck... she's made of wood.
Sir Bedevere: And therefore...
Peasant 2: ...A witch
Monty Python and the Holy Grail

There probably aren't very many bouncy castles over there. It's very rare because fat kids always jump on them and they pop

You laugh because I'm different, I laugh because you're all the same

Nun: You don't believe in God because of Alice in Wonderland?
Loki: No, "Through the Looking Glass". That poem, "The Walrus and the Carpenter" that's an indictment of organized religion. The walrus, with his girth and his good nature, he obviously represents either Buddha, or... or with his tusk, the Hindu elephant god, Lord Ganesha. That takes care of your Eastern religions. Now the carpenter, which is an obvious reference to Jesus Christ, who was raised a carpenter's son, he represents the Western religions. Now in the poem, what do they do... what do they do? They... They dupe all these oysters into following them and then proceed to shuck and devour the helpless creatures en masse. I don't know what that says to you, but to me it says that following these faiths based on mythological figures ensure the destruction of one's inner-being. Organized religion destroys who we are by inhibiting our actions... by inhibiting our decisions, out of... out of fear of some... some intangible parent figure who... who shakes a finger at us from thousands of years ago and says... and says, "Do it - Do it and I'll fckin' spank you.

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Bend It Like Weasley by Jedi Tess of Gryffindor reviews
FINAL CHAPTER UP! Loosely based on "Bend It Like Beckham." A girls' Quidditch team, with students from each House, forms at Hogwarts. A coach with questionable motives is the least of their worries. D-G, post OOTP, COMPLETE
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 22 - Words: 225,109 - Reviews: 1640 - Favs: 903 - Follows: 500 - Updated: 5/18/2010 - Published: 5/18/2003 - Draco M., Ginny W.
Pride & Prejudice by GoldenFawkes reviews
Draco is proud and prejudiced, but he might not be the only one. D/G. Now all but Epilogue-Compliant.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 19,216 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 4/5/2009 - Published: 5/24/2005 - Ginny W., Draco M.
Potter vs Malfoy: War's End by Jedi Tess of Gryffindor reviews
10 January: Chapter 10 edited and updated! Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy need near death experiences to finally reach a truce. That, and strongminded women. pre OotP, ships: Draco and Ginny, Harry and girl!Blaise, COMPLETE
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 247,160 - Reviews: 1332 - Favs: 823 - Follows: 102 - Updated: 7/19/2007 - Published: 10/14/2002 - Draco M., Ginny W. - Complete
If It Were Any Simpler, It Would Be Impossible by MochaButterfly reviews
DISCONTINUED due to Book Six: Ginny’s been sent undercover to retrieve Draco from Spain. But just who is deceiving who?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 114,318 - Reviews: 648 - Favs: 210 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 6/1/2005 - Published: 7/6/2003 - Draco M., Ginny W.
It's Midnight and I'm Still Not Famous by Abigail-Nicole reviews
Sometimes I think the whole school is always awake at night. It’s amazing what you see if you have the Map, everyone in the world is walking around at three a.m. A journal entry from four to five AM, a James soliloquy
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,867 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 4 - Published: 9/11/2004 - James P., Sirius B. - Complete
Grocery Shopping by Abigail-Nicole reviews
Ginny and Draco, a tentatively engaged couple, attempt to risk the couple-breaking task of... grocery shopping. Will they survive?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,410 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 18 - Published: 5/8/2004 - Ginny W., Draco M. - Complete
Lessons Of The Heart by cassi0peia reviews
*Now Complete* When Ginny Weasley catches Draco Malfoy doing something he shouldn't be, she blackmails him to teach her to fly. But will they both learn a lot more?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 46,859 - Reviews: 1118 - Favs: 478 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 2/26/2003 - Published: 1/10/2003 - Draco M., Ginny W. - Complete
All You Need Is Love by MochaButterfly reviews
Ginny wakes up one morning and finds herself in a totally different world. The year is 1607, she's a Muggle, there are only few magical people in the world, she's an only child, she's betrothed to her worst enemy, and she's . . . a princess?!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 159,649 - Reviews: 2048 - Favs: 1,094 - Follows: 87 - Updated: 9/29/2002 - Published: 9/27/2001 - Draco M., Ginny W.
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