Unfortunately Freckled
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Joined 07-19-04, id: 635617, Profile Updated: 05-06-08
Author has written 7 stories for Yu-Gi-Oh, Harry Potter, and Naruto.

Here's a little diddy I just wrote for all you brilliant people (I hope it illustrates my love):

There's a vicious-bitch-beast cat in my lap by Laura-Jane

Catnip is weed for cats, but

Holy shit, this thing is going to eat me.

Or slaughter/decimate me.

I don't want to die.

So I'll type reaaaal sly.

Until she looses interest

And eats her food that is dry

Songs are

Sort of hard to write

And rhyme hurts

THERE. We've established a wonderful connection. I've bared my soul in song and you've ventured to my webprofile. There is lurve in the circuts.

I love to know things about other authors and it always irks me when they put other things instead of their bios in this happy, happy place. I like pretending this is a geekie facebook. I'm addicted to facebook-I'm a bit of a whore for it. Actually, I'm sure I'm riddled with all kinds of facebook-stds.

And then god said, let there be a name:

Laura-Jane. Sort of. Sometimes it's LJ, but only when gangster signs are involved. At some point, I was called Sir Thomas Patrick the 3rd, but I don't know why. Apparently, I thought it was hilarious as did my clan, but it only serves to remind me of my 7th grade boy-cut. Lajaha is also a preferable nickname. Who doesn't love to sound Indian when they're clearly anglo-saxan? I like mild curry just as much as the next person.

Places are stupendous:

In the far, hot, muggy reaches of the south. It's like one huge steaming pile of humidity and church-dom. Once, I went to New York... And there were huge, towering buildings and hordes of rude people and one girl who dropped her pants in front of me to pee. At one point in my life, I thought that all this hoopla about the north and south being so different was crap squared. Now, I'm not so sure. A land without sweettea? What is this blasphemy? Raspberry tea is sweet enough yes, but too tart for my tastes.

Be careful Nestea...I just might stage another boston tea party...only I'm going to dress up like a 31st century tu-tu clad robot and toss your idiot teabags into a lake. And then all the little animals and bears and salmon will have to suffer with your tartness!

I go to a college where I'm outnumbered by deer 8:1. It's private, out of the way, old and expensive as ass. Sometimes, it smells like cow poop. But there are castles. And green, vindictive ghosts.

Le Aggggggge:

‘G's look so strange in bold.

I'm 19, recently. It's not-so-great. It's the same as being 18, only more bothersome.

Sexxxxxxxxxx:

I'm convinced that there are no male yaoi writers on fanfic.net (except for that one guy who writes about Naruto getting pregnant and violated by Sasuke a lot), so I find this part of the bio irrelevant.

But I'm female as female can be. I love me some high-heels and skirts. And perfume. AHHH AROMAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSS.

Crap, see? By this time in the bio, I become bored with my mundaneness and am persuaded to snap my laptop together and twitter off to other things.

I write slow. I'm sorrrrry! In fact, this short, crappy bio has been brewing on my computer for three days (edit: 3 months now). I think my problem is my incy attention span. I write a couple of paragraphs and then the bathroom invites all sorts of shenanigans to be had and I have to go venture forth and bam. I'm gone.

I want to be an author one of these days. Now that I'm a sort/of/half/an/adult, I feel like maybe I should be writing some serious crap. It only survives a couple of paragraphs before I turn them into fanfics. Really, that only happened once.

INTERMEZZZZZZZO

Um.

I'd be happy to read any stories you guys have written--! I love reading things-makes me feel elated and happy I can translate symbols into ideas in my head. Yay literate!

Now I'm beginning to feel vain. This is tooo much me-ness! I hope you don't mind if I spill a little more Laura-Jane goop on the keyboard.

I like everything really...Mostly deserts-but really the Egyptian kind (with the fat, rolling red sand mmm) , none of this dry, dirty nonsense. And all my friends who've gone off to their far-off fairy-tale colleges and left me to the town of crapness. Music is nice with Orchestras.

I don't really enjoy arrogance, especially in the form of authors. It's not so much in the field of professionals as it is in the land of frolicking whatever-ers. I was a 13 year old fanfic-player once-don't be hatin' on them younglings. They're learning. Their grammar might be poop, but offer to help fix it after pointing it out. Everyone inhaled profusely at some point.

Also, I can' stand it when poor Anime-crazed individuals feel that they need to be their favorite character in the realms of reality and so they insist on acting incredibly dumb and incompetent and cutesy because it's what makes "-inserthardtopronouncejapanesename-chan" so incredibly cute and likeable.

NO.

There is a monstrous difference between reality and Japanese cartoons. Don't further the idea that girls must be subservient to reel in suitors. I understand it'd be great to be just like "dontmakemerewriteiallagain-chan", but chances are if you find yourself writing incredibly bad dark poetry and just generally being angsty, you're probably not like that character. Yuck, just some animes know how to make women into mindless slabs of meat. I don't think meek, obedient women are attractive at all. I'm not going to make you a goddamn lunchbox, bitch must be crazy. You got hands, you stupid penis, go fix it yourself. Most the cutesy female leads in animes are disgustingly offensive to woman -kind. They're annnnnnoying. Teach them to be a bitch.

Also, cute is an offensive term to women (and even to men), but don't make me pull out my feminist packages. Cute is for furry, small, incompetent animals that are dependent on human beings for food and their welfare and just generally being alive (COWSSSSSSSSS). It is not appropriate for a fully functioning adult.

Haha, this bitty rant is not posed at anyone in particular. I went to my first convention and everyone seemed to be like this and it drove me absolutely mad.

But I love everyone! I do! Now I have to do the poetry homework I was supposed to do five weeks ago. Horay!

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Manipulator by Wellingtonboots reviews
The world lies in pieces at Voldemort's feet but he does not have the one thing he truely desires: Harry Potter's devotion. "Because not all love is Eros".
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 70,094 - Reviews: 602 - Favs: 457 - Follows: 534 - Updated: 7/31/2011 - Published: 6/1/2005 - Voldemort, Harry P.
Lightened Wings by Mistress-Starfire reviews
Like all of his ancestors, he was caught by Sasuke. Held captive in the Vampire's home, the outside world slowly loses him. Even when he has a chance to escape, will he take it? He may just fall in love with the Vampire, like his past selves...Sasunaru AU
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 36,757 - Reviews: 345 - Favs: 221 - Follows: 344 - Updated: 4/13/2009 - Published: 4/4/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U.
Tattered Innocence by child of the new dawn reviews
complete AU Voldemort is more determined than ever to find Harry after his narrow escape. Sirius and Remus must find away to keep a fiveyearold Harry safe from the Dark Lord, the Ministry, and the wizarding world begging for a hero.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Adventure - Chapters: 18 - Words: 39,313 - Reviews: 157 - Favs: 166 - Follows: 90 - Updated: 7/20/2007 - Published: 10/2/2004 - Harry P., Sirius B. - Complete
No logic in love by Quack says the T-shape reviews
Sasuke first had to convince Naruto they were in love, then that they were in a relationship, and finally, that they should have lots of sex. SasuNaru
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 314 - Reviews: 463 - Favs: 1,329 - Follows: 107 - Published: 3/10/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
My Funny Little Valentine by xXxDeadOnArrivalxXx reviews
My Uberlate Valentines day fanfic: How to share the Team Seven Lovin! woot!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,485 - Reviews: 178 - Favs: 266 - Follows: 27 - Published: 4/26/2006 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
The Forbidden Forest by Komoki-Tsuno reviews
On a dare, Yugi goes into the Forbidden Forest, to disprove the theory that it’s a bloodthirsty vampire’s territory. The theory isn’t so easy to disprove, however, when that very vampire finds him and kidnaps him. Is it possible for love to blossom?
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 12 - Words: 29,937 - Reviews: 300 - Favs: 188 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 3/6/2006 - Published: 3/12/2005 - Complete
Sapphire Orbs by Azamiko reviews
Sorry people. It's nothing like my usual stuff it's a parody about something that bugs me in fanfics...rated to be safe...
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,024 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/24/2005 - Complete
Kiss or Kill by Mortalus reviews
HPTR slash. A freak accident transports our favorite attractive psychopath forward in time from 1942 to 1996. Attempted homicide and attempted romance ensue, not necessarily in that order.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 105,484 - Reviews: 727 - Favs: 1,594 - Follows: 290 - Updated: 7/15/2005 - Published: 6/12/2005 - Harry P., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
When the Cat's Away by Vee-sempai reviews
Naruto and Sasuke are left alone while Kakashi trails an enemy, and Sasuke is badgered into admitting something he would rather not. Yaoi.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,461 - Reviews: 306 - Favs: 948 - Follows: 117 - Published: 2/17/2004
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Curse of the Red Vine Lovers reviews
We’re cursed to be with each other for an eternity, Naruto. You’re going to have to get used to the kissing thing. SasuNaru
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 45,235 - Reviews: 348 - Favs: 327 - Follows: 443 - Updated: 12/31/2007 - Published: 11/24/2006 - Naruto U., Sasuke U.
In the Presence of Fragmented Days reviews
Orochimaru rewards Sasuke’s loyalty by kidnapping and delivering him Naruto. Faced with the dilemma of whether to love or control him, Sasuke must now find the lost smooth edges of his fragmented mind in order to save Naruto from himself. Sasunaru
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,316 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 63 - Published: 3/1/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U.
The Warm Bride reviews
It is an Uchiha tradition to marry in the summer of one’s 17th birthday and Sasuke doesn’t plan on breaking it. The only dilemma is convincing the bride. [SasuNaru]
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 20,557 - Reviews: 275 - Favs: 383 - Follows: 510 - Updated: 12/24/2006 - Published: 6/28/2006 - Naruto U., Sasuke U.
A Ghost Without Regret reviews
A supposed moaning ghost is plaguing Konoha and Tsunade is forced into sending a team to investigate. What they find, however, is entirely different and it just might traumatize them. [SasuNaru]
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,038 - Reviews: 105 - Favs: 281 - Follows: 28 - Published: 7/21/2006 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
The Fox and the Wolf reviews
Sasuke is ordered to kidnap a demon spirit who drives him pleasantly insane. [SasuNaru]
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 9,702 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 105 - Updated: 4/30/2006 - Published: 4/14/2006 - Naruto U., Sasuke U.
The Time Embezzler reviews
Because of a horde of random events, Voldemort has been delayed four years from attacking Harry.Sirius has more incentive to break free from Azkaban to save him...
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,953 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/29/2005 - Harry P., Sirius B.
The Lovely Frown reviews
Yuugi and Yami must face their toughest enemy yet: Death. The hikari's grandfather has died, leaving him dull, listless, and feeling more alone then he ever has. Yami must now try to make the boy smile before his final choice is needed: Yami or Atemu.YxYY
Yu-Gi-Oh - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,245 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/10/2005