Poll: Who wants a Ymir/Nathaniel Bartemus omake? Vote Now!
Author has written 9 stories for Anime X-overs, Yu-Gi-Oh, Teen Titans, Pokémon, Harry Potter, Fullmetal Alchemist, Shingeki no Kyojin/進撃の巨人, Twilight, and Free! - Iwatobi Swim Club.
This quote I found on Wiki amused me.
Fanfiction is what literature might look like if it were reinvented from scratch after a nuclear apocalypse by a band of brilliant pop-culture junkies trapped in a sealed bunker. They don't do it for money. That's not what it's about. The writers write it and put it up online just for the satisfaction. They're fans, but they're not silent, couchbound consumers of media. The culture talks to them, and they talk back to the culture in its own language.
—Lev Grossman, TIME, July 18, 2011
"FULLMETAL LOL" HAS OFFICIALLY MADE IT TO TVTROPES:
Thank you to CelticKawaii for the awesome tropes listed, and anyone else who might have added :D
Thank you to eyeheartturtles for the amazing recommendation :D
ALSO I AM ON TEH TUMBLS
AND ALSO VAGUELY PUTTING TOGETHER A ZAZZLE ACCOUNT (IT'S PATHETIC RIGHT NOW BUT GO LOOK AT IT ANYWAY):
I'm just your average, boring office worker with an overactive imagination who lets out all her crazy in the form of crack fiction and chibi doodles.
Age: Too old to be on this website.
(okay I'm 23)
Gender: Of the feminine kind.
Blood Type: Coffee
Hair Color: Brown
Eye Color: Leafy
Height: Shorter than Ed
Likes: Dishwashing detergent
Dislikes: Puppies. They’re manipulative.
Hobbies: Pretending to be Wonder Woman while hitting people with stale baguettes. Also writing back to readers who took the time to review :3
I...completely forgot I had an account on this thing.
Anyway, I call myself Nimrochan, and I used to write what I like to call "crack-fanfiction" in high school whenever I was bored. Now, I'm working full time, and I have far better things I should be doing.
But writing crack-fics is too much fun 8D
I realized I should probably put more information about myself.
UM...Boy I'm terrible at this... I live in the U.S in a hot place where there's not much to do. Well there's the beach but I'm pale as an albino monitor lizard (hence general avoidance of the sun, though I do go on occasion when I have 8 gallons of sunscreen on hand). I have also lived in Israel and Japan (random, much?)
I hate snow
I'm a full-blown nerd; I prefer watching hours of anime to pretty much anything else (though recently I've discovered the awesomeness of Star Trek. But I like other shows too). I also like reading. I'm too lazy to list all the shows, movies, anime, and books that I like but they're all really good.
I despise Twilight with every fiber of my being.
And yes, I read it (I had no choice- it was an 11 hour flight and I had finished my other book. Just to illustrate, that other book was "Memoirs of a Geisha." Imagine eating cookie dough cheesecake of the finest quality, and then eating a fish that's been lying dead in the sun for three days. That's what it felt like to read those two books in a row like that.)
I'm also not fond of when people insist on showing me youtube videos of cats. For some reason I've met an alarming number of people who do this to me.
But I will admit that I love videos of turtles eating for some reason...
And finally, the thing I hate the most, more so than snow, Twilight, and cat videos combined, is reality television. More specifically, shows involving cameras following bitchy rich women around. I can't even find ways to make fun of reality television. It's just...nothingness.
Anyway, I also enjoy swimming (on cloudy days), writing (normally I work in secret on my own original stuff, but I've recently floated back here due to my obsession with FMA and ideas for its crackfic parody xD), and drawing (I've been drawing for about five years but so far can only draw chibis. Which I'm very good at). I can also speak beginner/intermediate Hebrew and Japanese.
My parents divorced when I was very young. I think that's why I love cartoons so much.
In real life I'm actually much more shy and quiet than I am on the Internet. I guess I like the anonymity of it. But I do try to always be nice, be it on the Internet or real life. Additionally, I'm a very lazy, do-it-tomorrow kind of person. I mean, it will get done. Just not today.
I am also a hypochondriac. That is why I swore off Webmd and watching "House." I'm quite happy with that decision.
Like many people, I love animals. Except for hamsters, they creep me out. At one point I had considered being a vet, but the idea was dismissed after remembering how lazy I am with intense studies.
Crackfiction and chibis are my only talents. I suppose my original writing is good too, but I can't really know since I don't generally let people read any of it *self-conscious*
My dreams are very big and include many things. I like traveling a lot, so maybe I'll get into international business and continue to learn languages. On the other hand, I like creating things and entertaining people, so I'd also like to maybe be a producer or writer and get into movies/TV shows. I've also considered being a plumber at one point (I have many good reasons for this: little job competition, good pay, people will always need plumbers hence there will always be work, I enjoy fixing things, Mario is a plumber, etc.) My ultimate dream is to be a mangaka (manga artist), but lack of professional drawing abilities, lack of fluency in Japanese, and being lazy in general would probably hinder that. Hey I'm a realist, what can I say.
I'll eventually post up a link to a website with the chibis...I have a domain name and nothing else. I don't know anything about creating websites so if anyone else here can help me take the next step it would be greatly appreciated :D
Also, I'll eventually post links to websites with pictures from Israel and Japan. They're awesomeness
WEIRD THINGS ABOUT ME
I collect weird mugs and notebooks
The sound of my laughter is that of a dying hyena
I have a severe phobia of bees
I have spent literally years of my life getting my Gollum impersonation down to an eerie perfection
I am a pessimist who tries to make all the decisions of an optimist
I hate zombie movies but love zombie video games for some reason
(EDIT: Zombieland is win)
I love birds
I have a scar on my left wrist from when I burned myself making Mac N' Cheese
I don't like apples
English is not my first language
I almost got arrested for sneaking into a school auditorium after hours so I could watch anime on a big screen
I made that last part up
Or maybe I didn't
I was once accidentally exposed to pepper spray
All my friends are taller than me
All of them
Some freakishly so
A lot of people tell me that Japan and China are "the same thing" even after I've explained that I've STUDIED both cultures
Yes they will argue with me
I once handled a Gila monster
It was awesome
CGI babies and dancing animals seriously creep me out
I like Glee songs but I don't watch Glee
I'm slowly starving to death because I'm so broke
I still laugh at Looney Tunes. Like, really hard.
I hate crappy remakes, including and especially the new Looney Tunes show
I once worked at a petshop
I believe that if Satan exists, his tool is the printer
I failed high school Algebra
I then studied accounting
I am a 90's chick. I listen to Nirvana and watch old Warner Bros. cartoons, Sailor Moon and Dragonball Z are among my first anime, and I got my first cell phone at 16 and my first laptop at 18.
I like being a 90's chick.
I own a fedora
I didn't learn how to bike until I was twenty
I have a scar on my left knee from when I crashed my bike after a bee flew in my face... at age twenty
I am of that generation of Harry Potter readers who literally grew up with the characters, and waited til the midnight releases of the last three books
I don't know if I'll ever love anything more than I do Harry Potter or Fullmetal Alchemist
(Edit: GAME OF F*ING THRONES)
(Well I don't love GoT more than those last two, but it's up there with them)
I cuss like a sailor whenever I play video games
Eating pork creeps me out, so I don't do it, but I do enjoy octopus, squid, and eel
Pointlessy stupid and ironic things happen to me all the time
I think it's why I hate sitcom humor so much
I sometimes experience sleep paralysis
(Look it up, it's freaky)
Bad horror movies are my guilty pleasure
I look exactly the same as I did ten years ago and it really freaks people out
My handwriting makes my English teachers cry
I think that the "Major Boobage" episode of South Park was the funniest 23 minutes of my life
My fingertips get so cold that sometimes my touchscreen doesn't work for me
My handwriting makes me cry
Sometimes I get so bored I narrate my life out-loud
My hips are double-jointed
Most of my cell phone photos are of baked goods and weird bugs I find
If I where a witch, I'd be a Gryffindor
And my Patronus would be a Star-Bellied Sneetch
And I wouldn't ever actually see said Patronus because I'd be a Squib
Why did they let me be a Gryffindor if I'm a Squib?
People tell me that I always look frustrated or angry
But honestly my face is just like that
I like learning things, but I usually forget what I learned a week later at the most
I can't stop adding things to this profile
I find assembling IKEA furniture strangely therapeutic
I'm so pale I'm see-through
I can't cook
I have a scar on my right leg from when my roommate's laundry pile became self-aware and attacked me
I despise computer animation
(EDIT: I loved Tangled. Questioning everything.)
I didn't graduate college in time despite my awesome grades
I argue with commercials
I argue with books
I sometimes wish I had a tail
MY BUCKET LIST- things I want to do while I'm alive
Be a zombie extra in a zombie movie
Publish something. Anything.
Make an abridged series (so far all of my ideas are terrible)
Get over my fear of bees
Adopt a puppy
Invent a soda
Travel all of Asia
Watch all the anime on my hard drive
Meet Hiromu Arakawa and Shinichiro Watanabe
MY NICKNAMES that were assigned to me without my consent
Kofujoshi Hetakunoichi (Little nasty woman, Unskilled female ninja)
Mac N' Cheese
THINGS THAT INSPIRE MY CRACK WRITING
As you may know, I love writing humor. I especially enjoy parodying stories I love, and completely messing with the characters while destroying what made those stories great. It amuses me.
I suck at writing anything else, especially romance and horror. All the same things can make one swoon or be terrified or sad, etc., hence it's hard to make certain things fresh/new, in my opinion anyway. On the other hand, there are a million and five things out there that can be funny. These following things inspire me (I try to pick from a wide variety of inspiration):
Seinfeld (it's old yes, but it has some pretty decent dysfunction)
Curb Your Enthusiasm (same dysfunction as Seinfeld but it's more vulgar. Which I'm totally okay with)
Married with Children
Malcolm in the Middle
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Harold and Kumar
Eurotrip (it's actually WAAYYY funnier than you'd think)
Rat Race (because Mr. Bean was in it)
The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series (that counts as British, right?)
Oh where to begin. All that weird, surreal, slapstick humor found in anime…xD
I guess my biggest inspiration here is Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei, which I'm fairly certain was made by force-feeding acid to the characters and setting all the story boards on fire.
(EDIT and also Excel Saga and Gintama. I only started watching those but yeah. Epic.)
STUFF IN THE WORKS:
I'm currently working on some experimental crack parodies:
1) A Samurai Champloo parody, in which the the trio searches for "the man who smells of Glade," with Jin and Mugen escaping from amusingly dark pasts.
2) An LOTR parody, in which they must destroy "the one iPhone/iPad."
3) A Naruto parody, in which Naruto is possessed by a great and evil radish.
4) A Harry Potter parody, in which all the characters are bats*t OOC.
5) A Death Note parody, in which Light is just really stupid.
Suggestions welcome! Just don't take offense if I don't end up going with them ''
The Fullmetal Alchemist crack parody takes priority over any other fic, of course. I try to update monthly but sometimes it may take longer due to work and studies.
Anything else I have here was written YEARS ago, and I wasn't as good a writer then (but they still got very decent reviews, and I still like them a whole lot, so feel free to check them out! _)
AND YET MORE AWESOMEY AWESOME STUFF
If anyone enjoyed the Teen Titans fic I wrote a few years ago, please check out this audio book of the first three chapters by Millie a.k.a. Assassinating:
And if you enjoyed that, here's the next three:
She's a very talented voice actress and artist, check out her website:
ALSO- For those who enjoy Fullmetal Lol, here is the first scene done in flipnote animation by strawberries up the butt a.k.a. s.u.u.b:
(aw it's been since taken down... oh well.)
And here's her Flipnote Hatena profile, she has some Vampire Knight and Bleach stuff and others, all done in an awesome style :3
Again, I need help building a website! I have only the domain name! Any help with it welcomed! :D
Feel free to PM me about fandoms and writings and such!
"Now… If you trust in yourself… And believe in your dreams… And follow your star… You’ll still get beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learning things and weren’t so lazy."
Miss Tick, The Wee Free Men
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