TheDreamChild
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Joined 08-19-04, id: 655989, Profile Updated: 04-27-08
Author has written 13 stories for Hidalgo, Lord of the Rings, Pirates of the Caribbean, Final Fantasy VII, Lost, and Kingdom Hearts.

BEHOLD THE NEW PROFILE (AS OF 4/27/08)!

Name: I don't give it out, for obvious reasons. Just call me Inwe (EEN-way).

Age: Immortal. Duh.

Appearance: Who's asking?

THE RIGHTFULLY DREADED AND MUCH EDITTED LIST OF FAVORITES!

Movies: Pirates of the Carribean, Lord of the Rings, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children, The Chronicles of Narnia, Hidalgo, Kingdom of Heaven, Gladiator, Howl's Moving Castle.

Books: Generally, all books. Especially stuff my friend Aki gives me because she has excellent taste in literature.

Anime/Manga: Bleach, Rurouni Kenshin, Naruto, .hack//SIGN, Fruits Basket, One Piece.

Video Games: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII (that's the original game, Crisis Core, Dirge of Cerberus, and Before Crisis). Kingdom Hearts (I, II, and Chain of Memories), Final Fantasy X, Final Fantasy VIII, Assassin's Creed.

Characters: Reno, Zack, Cloud, Vincent, all the Turks, Tifa, and Good!Sephiroth (Final Fantasy VII); Norrington and Jack (Pirates of the Carribean); Eowyn, Arwen, Faramir, and Merry (Lord of the Rings); Charlie, Claire, Sayid, Danielle, and Alexandra (LOST); Abby, Gibbs, and Ducky (NCIS); Ichigo, Renji, Rukia, Byakuya, Kenpachi, Urahara, and Hitsugaya (Bleach); Kiba, Gaara, Shikamaru, and Lee (Naruto); The Kenshin-gumi, Saito, Aoshi, and Enishi (Rurouni Kenshin).

THE NOT QUITE SO DREADED BUT EQUALLY DANGEROUS LIST OF HATED STUFF!

Movies: The Harry Potter movies. They must die. That, and all those Barbie movies they advertise on TV...

Books: Aside from X-rated stuff? I hated the Golden Compass, Subtle Knife, and Amber Spyglass.

Anime/Manga: Haven't found any yet.

Video Games: Most anything over M, but I'm open-minded. Don't really like the morals in Grand Theft Auto, so I won't play it.

Characters: Oh boy. I have a Hit List of Doom for a reason. So, I'll just list one from each fandom: Hojo (FF7), Akito (Fruits Basket), Umbridge (Harry Potter), Beckett (Pirates of the Carribean), and that weird guy who's captain of 12th Division in Bleach...whatshisface... Also, though not on my Hit List of Doom for financial reasons, I loathe Rufus Shinra.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

I WON, I WON, NEENER, NEENER, NEENERRR! by All-Knowing Alien 2 reviews
Sauron FINALLY gets the Ring, but soon learns the downside when he has to deal with Sues, the 9 and three quarters Nazgul, Valar!Sues and...worser things. -EVIL laugh- Rated T for language and questionable themes. Don't own LoTR or the wonderful Koss.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 31 - Words: 131,536 - Reviews: 501 - Favs: 157 - Follows: 114 - Updated: 3/4/2014 - Published: 3/15/2006 - Sauron
When Rude met Reno by Vitalini reviews
Its not easy being a Turk, but what does it take to become one? While Rude is discovering what it really means to be a Turk, Tseng finally thinks he’s found a way to calm a certain redheaded devil causing havoc in the Turk department. Join Rude and....
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 174,848 - Reviews: 158 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 101 - Updated: 5/25/2011 - Published: 2/1/2007 - Rude, Reno
Before Crisis: The Beginning by The Inimitable DA reviews
Before Cloud and co. a war raged between AVALANCHE and the Turks. Series of Before Crisis snippets, more or less following the original 24 episodes. All characters.
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 30 - Words: 93,793 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 9/13/2010 - Published: 3/29/2007
The Parody of my Life by silent rhyme reviews
It was raining, and it was Tuesday, but this is repetitive because it always rains on Tuesdays. Actually it rains most days around here, unless of course it’s cold enough to snow.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,081 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/19/2009 - Edward
The Heart Gathers the Scattered Pieces reference by Captain MeraSparrow reviews
x "Jack Sparra been scattered 'cross de worlds. It is up to you to bring him back." This story is being scrapped. It will be revamped and re-uploaded sometime in a general not now direction.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 40 - Words: 189,049 - Reviews: 280 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 5/11/2009 - Published: 10/21/2006 - James N.
Those Lacking Spines by Organization VI reviews
Immune to a suspicious parasite by merit of their manly looks, Xaldin, Vexen and Lexaeus set out on a journey to save the rest of Organization XIII from the biggest nightmare of all: stupid fanfiction.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 13 - Words: 111,474 - Reviews: 1887 - Favs: 2,278 - Follows: 630 - Updated: 9/18/2008 - Published: 4/20/2006 - Xaldin, Vexen - Complete
Aftermath of Tragedy by Alantie Mistaniu reviews
People would come and go, nothing was permanent or lasted forever. Cissnei understood that better than anyone. Slightly CissneixZack. Spoilers for Crisis Core! You have been warned!
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,763 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/8/2008 - Zack F., Shuriken/Cissnei - Complete
The Price of Freedom by Mr.Who2123 reviews
Crisis Core fic. MAJOR SPOILERS Oneshot/Drabble about what Zack thought and did from end boss fight to the end of the game. Zack had said the price of freedom is steep, but he will fight for that freedom...for that's what he truly believes in. ZackAerith
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,526 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Published: 4/4/2008 - Zack F. - Complete
Organization XIII: State of the Fandom Address by The Masked Reviewers reviews
Organization XIII has been abused. They've been Yaoified. And slowly, they can feel the changes made to their personalites starting to affect them. They've decided words are the way to stop the fangirls... And so they've come to address the fan community.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 14,107 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 3/29/2008 - Published: 3/10/2007
The Random Life of Reno by Mischievious Moogle reviews
Just some random stories about [almost] everyone's favorite Turk, Reno!
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 57 - Words: 21,374 - Reviews: 457 - Favs: 116 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 3/24/2008 - Published: 3/9/2006
Turk Moments by SapphireXSerpent reviews
Whether fluffy, funny, or serious, Turks have many moments. A collection of turk drabbles and oneshots with Relena ones spinkled in. Rated T for language.
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 37 - Words: 18,132 - Reviews: 233 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 1/5/2008 - Published: 4/3/2006 - Elena, Reno
The Life that Never Was by Rykt reviews
What would happen if reality as you know it shattered? If you had turned your entire family into dolls? And my only solaces are a pyro and a kid.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 16 - Words: 14,797 - Reviews: 73 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 12/19/2007 - Published: 6/28/2006 - Axel
Once Upon a Franchise: An ANTI Harry Potter xover by Farawen reviews
The gang for no reason ends up at Hogwarts and crazy crap happens. From the author that brought you So Delicious and Romeo and Juliet: Sasuke's Solution comes a completely new OOC crack fic, and the guyliner returns!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,790 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 12/18/2007 - Published: 7/9/2007 - Naruto U., Kabuto Y.
Ask Reno! by Mischievious Moogle reviews
Reno is finally taking the time to answer any questions his fans may have! What have you always wanted to ask the adorable redhaired Turk?
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,058 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 12/4/2007 - Published: 6/5/2007 - Reno
Mary Sues of Hogwarts by Agent Motiel reviews
Ever get annoyed with sues? Want to rip their heads off and throw them from the highest tower? Join the club. I'll relieve your frustration by presenting a different sue each chapter and murdering them very messily! Companion to Mary Sues of Middle Earth.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,355 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 9/29/2007 - Published: 4/14/2007 - OC, Harry P.
Mary Sues Must Die! by dk2022 reviews
The Forgotten City never seemed so overcrowded.
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 931 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 5 - Published: 9/10/2007 - Kadaj - Complete
Too Far by Vitalini reviews
[Oneshot] Rude after the Sector seven incident, he gazes down at the destruction from Reno’s apartment window.
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,101 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 16 - Published: 9/9/2007 - Rude, Reno - Complete
The Care and Keeping of Bishies by Margret Esmerelda Note Spelling reviews
An Anouncement From Your Friends at the SPCB.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,261 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 10 - Published: 3/27/2007 - Complete
All about Jack Sparrow and others by threeheadedmonkey reviews
I was wondering what our favourite pirate would reply if he were sent one of those Get to know your friends emails...If you want me to do more characters, just send me your suggestions and I'll see what I can do:
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 14,405 - Reviews: 310 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 11/28/2006 - Published: 8/18/2006
Hoofin' It With Pirates by Captain MeraSparrow reviews
A modern yet irritatingly random girl travels through the dimensions to meet CJS. And just in time for him to get turned into a ... well you'll just have to read and see! Not the usual! noJOC, no MarySue!R&R,EpilogueUp! Closing!
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 67,276 - Reviews: 246 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 9/14/2006 - Published: 10/22/2005 - Capt. Jack Sparrow, James N. - Complete
Parody of the Caribbean:Curse of the Bungled Prose by Luna-GrrrBack023 reviews
Yet another parody of our favorite movie. Same plot and characters as the movie but with all the strange little plot plays and twists I could make. Includes ADD, black market light fixtures, a bone crushing death trap, and a volcano.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 24,246 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 9/14/2006 - Published: 6/15/2006 - Complete
Of Beckett and Bashings by Luthy Lovett reviews
Various Beckett bashing goodness. Huzzah!
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,109 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 8/31/2006 - Published: 8/13/2006
The Obsession of the Black Pearl by Luna-GrrrBack023 reviews
As the premier of POTC 2 draws near the obsessive fans cannot take it any longer and the take much more drastic measures than reading spoilers. Follow one fan on a very familiar adventure and see just how far obsessiveness goes.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,025 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 7/25/2006 - Published: 6/11/2006 - Complete
Canon Strikes Back by PirateBlacksmith reviews
When Mary Sues invade and the characters stay in character. Completed.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 17,194 - Reviews: 182 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 10/5/2004 - Published: 4/18/2004 - Complete
The Basement by Marz1 reviews
AU third year. I must have a sign on my back that says psycho paths please attack me. I would not put it beyond Dudley to afix such a sign to me, but I doubt he could spell it accurately enough for a psycho to understand.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 27 - Words: 80,802 - Reviews: 1387 - Favs: 1,110 - Follows: 215 - Updated: 5/30/2004 - Published: 12/2/2003 - Harry P., Sirius B. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Final Addition reviews
Square Enix and Disney have made great games together in the past, but this time they've gone too far. Is this the third Kingdom Hearts, or is something more sinister at work? Three authoresses and their friends vow to find out. Rated for safety. R&R.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 44,565 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 5/8/2008 - Published: 3/28/2007
The Funeral reviews
CRISIS CORE SPOILERS. Reno, Rude, and Cissnei come across the site of the final battle. Drabble. Rated for blood, language, and mention of alcohol.
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,646 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/5/2008 - Complete
The Kingdom of the Sue reviews
Kingdom Hearts? What's that? Yes, dear readers, Rana is back...but where exactly is she? Lost in an unknown world full of Sues, Rana must help a mysterious Organization...if they don't kill her first. Sequel to The Hunting of the Sue. Rated for safety. R&
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 29,639 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 3/2/2008 - Published: 1/16/2008
This Destiny reviews
SPOILERS. A poem I wrote after the events of the season finale. Just venting certain frustrations and the overload of angst.
Lost - Rated: K - English - Angst/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 164 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 5/24/2007 - Complete
A Pirate's Life For Me, Depressing It May Be reviews
A poem about...well, about how we're all feeling in the final days before PotC3 comes out. Mostly just a fangirl's rantings, but I think we can all relate.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 590 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Published: 5/14/2007 - Complete
Randomishedishness reviews
Take an obsessive author and her assorted friends. Have her muse join Beckett and steal her author powers. Then add the Chinese zodiac, a turkey vulture, a psychopathic killer, and a daring chase across FanFictiondom. PotC x everything. Rated for safety.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 18 - Words: 33,085 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 3/19/2007 - Published: 9/29/2006 - Complete
The Twelve Days of Christmas: Final Fantasy VII reviews
What can I say? I was bored. WARNING: This song may not make sense.
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 764 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/5/2006 - Complete
The Hunting of the Sue reviews
When Sues invade ME, a modern girl finds herself helping a band of rangers get rid of them. But how are the Sues getting in, and why? Plot twists and all kinds of humor, R&R or no updates. Gets longer as you go.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 15 - Words: 20,456 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 8/28/2006 - Published: 6/16/2006 - Aragorn, Legolas - Complete
Why Not to Make Enemies with Pirates and Authors reviews
[long drabble] Norrington is acting like Frodo, Beckett is realizing he's got enemies, and the authoress is to blame, though she's not feeling too guilty. sorta DMC spoilers.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 979 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Published: 8/23/2006 - Complete
Regret reviews
[oneshot] DMC spoilers! Beckett tells Norrington some very troubling news concerning Elizabeth. Rated for, I dunno, alcohol content?
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 882 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/19/2006 - Complete
Total Chaos reviews
[twoshot] Capt. Jack Sparrow finds himself helping the Weasley twins defeat Umbridge. DMC and OotP spoilers, for those few who haven't seen or read it.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,976 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/17/2006 - Complete
Lament for Captain Jack Sparrow reviews
Just a little something I wrote up while listening to the FotR soundtrack. DMC spoilers, sort of.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 69 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 8/3/2006
Freedom Ring reviews
How a mustang is affected by the Burns Amendment. Full summary inside. Caution: horse slaughter scene later on. Please R&R. Chapter 5 is up! Complete.
Hidalgo - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,643 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 12/24/2005 - Published: 8/18/2005 - Complete