Crack.Alchemist
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Joined 02-28-15, id: 6571227, Profile Updated: 02-28-15
Author has written 12 stories for Fullmetal Alchemist, Ouran High School Host Club, Uta no Prince-sama, and Free! - Iwatobi Swim Club.

Serving up FMA crack since 2005. This is my first time on fanfiction.net; patience is appreciated.

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LionHeart by Yulisan reviews
7 years after Haruhi left Ouran Academy she is now settled into a boring life of work. Until an unexpected letter from Ouran arrives at her home inviting her to an elegant reunion evening, a chance to see all the friends she hasn't spoken to in years. Surrounded by the Host Club once more, she is thrown into the life of romance, humour and conflict she had long forgot. M for Lemons
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 28 - Words: 173,976 - Reviews: 250 - Favs: 615 - Follows: 350 - Updated: 9/15/2019 - Published: 9/10/2014 - [Haruhi F., Hikaru H.] - Complete
Devious House Husbands by Fruits Of Passion reviews
After an argument with his husband Ai just wanted some carefree fun, luckily for him he doesn't have to look far as his red-haired pool boy is absolutely delicious. (Slow build. Multi-coupled)
Free! - Iwatobi Swim Club - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 17 - Words: 79,058 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 88 - Updated: 10/6/2018 - Published: 10/12/2014 - [Aiichirou N., Rin M.] Sousuke Y.
Those 520 cenz by SomeDrunkSheep reviews
In urgent need of money, Edward Elric borrowed 520 cenz from Roy Mustang, vowing he would return them only when the Flame Alchemist became Fuhrer of Amestris, not knowing that he would end up watching him closely in his ascension to the top. RoyEd, M rated.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 28 - Words: 269,956 - Reviews: 125 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 9/17/2018 - Published: 2/1/2015 - Edward E., Roy M.
DEJA VU ALL OVER AGAIN (YURI ON ICE) by BinaryTales reviews
"Contrary to popular rumor, I have scruples. And unlike my rival on the ice, Chris Giacometti, I don't generally have to send out a scouting party to find them." Viktor and Yuuri barely lived down the scandal of last year's Grand Prix banquet...but history has a bad habit of repeating itself...
Yuri!!! on Ice - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 14,063 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 2/4/2017 - Published: 1/14/2017 - Yuuri K., Viktor N., Yuri P., Christophe G.
Lean On Me by Fruits Of Passion reviews
With every bruise, every flinch, every fake smile, every closed off conversation Rin could tell something was wrong with Nitori. Something was hurting him yet the other boy never admitted, instead continued the charade that he was happy until he can no longer keep it inside and he reaches breaking point. Rintori
Free! - Iwatobi Swim Club - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 54,089 - Reviews: 201 - Favs: 190 - Follows: 244 - Updated: 5/9/2016 - Published: 2/18/2014 - [Aiichirou N., Rin M.] - Complete
Jean Havoc: A Work In Progress by havocmangawip reviews
What happened, happened. What matters now is how am I going to get through this? You can retire from the military, but being on Team Mustang is for life - you can't run from it, even if you could run... and now I get to start life over as a civilian. A reviewer advised that since there was no Philosopher's Stone, or not enough, on the Promised Day, that this is heavily AU.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 62 - Words: 403,782 - Reviews: 284 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 4/28/2016 - Published: 4/5/2006 - Gracia H., Jean H., Sciezska
The ButterShark Effect by The Alien from Uranus reviews
It's said that the slightest change in the beat of a butterfly's wings can ripple the course of the wind into a raging hurricane. Basically, Rin tries his hand at sexting and accidentally sends a picture of his wiener to Rei. Things escalate quickly. [RinRei / Yaoi / Lots of family fluff / Features Rei's brother, Nagisa's sisters, and Mrs. Matsuoka]
Free! - Iwatobi Swim Club - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 30,003 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 3/27/2016 - Published: 2/10/2015 - [Rei R., Rin M.] Nagisa H., Gou M. - Complete
The Merit of Falling In Love by Kudos4U reviews
Haruhi and Kyoya are in love. Here is the consequences of their love. Lemon included in plot.
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 71,747 - Reviews: 172 - Favs: 268 - Follows: 304 - Updated: 3/24/2016 - Published: 5/11/2013 - Haruhi F., Kyōya O.
The Advantage of Perspective by UP2L8 reviews
Years after the Promised Day, Führer Roy Mustang is well on his way to achieving everything he's ever dreamed of for Amestris. Then he discovers that there might be something he wants for himself.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 30 - Words: 183,297 - Reviews: 373 - Favs: 572 - Follows: 365 - Updated: 6/16/2015 - Published: 3/14/2014 - [Edward E., Roy M.] - Complete
The Demonic Host! by Nurse Medusa reviews
When Rin, Bon, Shima, and Izumo have to enroll in Ouran Academy to investigate the appearance of demons in the area what will happen? Crazy stuff, that's what. And how does Kyoya know Yukio? Read to find out!
Crossover - Ouran High School Host Club & Blue Exorcist/青の祓魔師 - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 12,079 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 6/9/2015 - Published: 3/2/2015 - Tamaki S., Kyōya O., Rin O., Yukio O. - Complete
Anytime, Anywhere by freaky-hanyou reviews
'...With Makoto, I want to try everything, anytime, anywhere.' When Haru had said those words, he hadn't realized just how much Makoto would take them to heart. Outdoors, restaurants...and now fitting rooms, apparently. Sequel to Something New but can be read alone. Smut and Swimsuits, HaruMako Oneshot
Free! - Iwatobi Swim Club - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,717 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 8 - Published: 6/2/2015 - Haruka N., Makoto T. - Complete
Let It Go by freaky-hanyou reviews
After dating Haruka for a few months, Masa notices this inexplicable energy building within him that he can't quite shake. However, he can't quite bring himself to tell Haruka about it either. Can't even bring himself to hold her hand, even. With the help of some advice from Ren, the two figure out how to finally express what they really desire:each other. Oneshot Smut! Masa/Haruka
Uta no Prince-sama - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,189 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 20 - Published: 5/28/2015 - Haruka N., Masato H. - Complete
Cut by Halibugz reviews
A mission where girls are going missing has brought Edward Elric back to his hometown to find out who exactly is doing this. But will the team working with him find out something about him as well? WARNING: Contains self harm! Updates every Wednesday!
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 30 - Words: 41,478 - Reviews: 104 - Favs: 160 - Follows: 114 - Updated: 4/29/2015 - Published: 3/22/2014 - Alphonse E., Edward E., Maes H., Roy M. - Complete
The Winter Soldier by bratmin reviews
Al is kidnapped, and while Ed lays dying he knows there is no way to save his little brother. After months of searching, they finally find him. Except the person they knew seems to have disappeared. Generals are being hunted and Edward has to choose between saving lives or saving his brother. {Established AlWin and EdJean. Eventual RoyEd. WARNING; MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH}
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,176 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 4/9/2015 - Published: 4/4/2015 - Alphonse E., Edward E., Jean H., Roy M.
HALF LIVES 4: PRIVATE LIVES (THE MUSTANG FILES) by BinaryTales reviews
Roy Mustang: Soldier. Alchemist. Statesman. Ambassador. World Traveler-or so the history books have called him. But as Roy would say, "there are the truths you'll read in the library-and then there are the REAL truths I'll tell you late at night over a bottle of whiskey. Shall I pour you a drink?"
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,005 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 3/13/2015 - Published: 3/5/2015
War that Breaks the Heart by ShadowX-Over.Writer reviews
AU. War breaks out all over the four Kingdoms of the Princes, causing financial problems for the people. Haruka then travels to the capitol in search of work. However, she never would have imagined working for one of the most important people in the Southern Kingdom. (In the process of being rewritten)
Uta no Prince-sama - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 44,108 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 67 - Updated: 3/11/2015 - Published: 2/16/2013 - [Masato H., Haruka N.] Ai M.
HALF LIVES 3: OUR LIVES by BinaryTales reviews
: Roy and Ed have been together for 15 years now—Roy prepares to fulfill his 520-cenz promise to make Amestris a democracy, but just before Roy's 50th birthday and his wedding to Edward a tell-all biography about Mustang is published that sets the country on its ear-because the 'truth' about the Promised Day is about to come out, with Roy cast as the evil genius behind it all
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 49 - Words: 179,961 - Reviews: 273 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 77 - Updated: 2/28/2015 - Published: 6/30/2012 - Roy M., Edward E.
Comfort in Hell by OneMoreMiracle-Fiction reviews
Roy is captured and tortured and Edward willingly offers to help Mustang to recover from his injuries but he never expected how close they'd grow in that time or the risk that Roy's captors were to his own life and to the lives of everyone he cares for. Slightly AU.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 19 - Words: 70,834 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 154 - Follows: 101 - Updated: 9/15/2014 - Published: 2/3/2014 - [Edward E., Roy M.] [Alphonse E., Winry R.] - Complete
Nights are Long on a Road Trip by The-Missing-Paige reviews
Road trips are great, especially when you're surrounded by friends. But sleeping away from home, out of your own bed, can be really strange. What happens when Roy, Havoc, Breda, Falman, Fuery,Alphonse, and Edward all go on a trip across Amestris together? Modern day Amestris AU.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 28,502 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 181 - Follows: 97 - Updated: 8/25/2014 - Published: 5/15/2014 - [Roy M., Edward E.] - Complete
Sold by The-Missing-Paige reviews
Edward Elric has a dream that he can give up his alchemic abilities to get his brother's body back. Just after doing so, he mysteriously disappears for months, only to be found in a whorehouse, having been sold into sexual slavery. He may be safe, but so many questions remain: who sold him, why won't Ed talk to anyone about it, and can he recover?
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 11,856 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 5/6/2014 - Published: 2/28/2014 - [Roy M., Edward E.] Alphonse E. - Complete
HOLIDAY SPECIAL: A MIDWINTER'S TALE (YAOI) by BinaryTales reviews
On a lonely Solstice night, Alphonse cheers Roy up with a challenge: "You've never told me about the men in your life. What about Brother? What about Hughes?" And the best stories begin with the words, "...there I was..."
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,555 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 12/21/2013 - Published: 12/15/2013 - Roy M., Edward E., Alphonse E., Maes H.
Misunderstandings by Mashuper reviews
Alphonse has finally gotten his emiciated, pale body back, something that puts Roy Mustang over the edge. After being hopelessly in love with the boy for so long, he now needs and craves him. Fluff and some smut.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,599 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/15/2013 - Alphonse E., Roy M. - Complete
Here Dead We Lie by mebh reviews
Following a disasterous operation in Aerugo, Colonel Mustang wakes from a coma to discover his world has fallen apart. Under the shadow of the state, he tries to find impossible answers before it is too late. Angst/Royai
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 91,735 - Reviews: 240 - Favs: 217 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 10/26/2012 - Published: 10/15/2010 - Roy M. - Complete
The Rascal Boy by mebh reviews
Following the death of his parents, a young Roy Mustang is placed in the care of his no nonsense aunt, Madame Christmas. Battling huffing and tantrums, the Madame tries to anchor the boy amidst the chaos of his loss. Ft a few more familiar faces too...
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 3 - Words: 15,892 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 3/7/2011 - Published: 11/23/2010 - Roy M. - Complete
HALF LIVES by BinaryTales reviews
Years have passed since the manga's end-life in Resembool has not gone well and Ed has the scars to prove it, seeking healing and refuge in his work at Central Command…but Roy Mustang refuses to see Ed suffer any longer...
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 31 - Words: 98,948 - Reviews: 301 - Favs: 332 - Follows: 170 - Updated: 11/7/2010 - Published: 7/11/2010 - Edward E., Roy M.
You Can't by MaybeTommorrow reviews
"No Ed you can't" Jean said as he backed away but we all know how well Ed responds to the word's 'You Can't'. JeanxEd HavocxEd lots of smut, be sated. xD and yes i did redo the summary, thanks for asking.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 17 - Words: 31,615 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 6/17/2010 - Published: 4/10/2010 - Edward E., Jean H. - Complete
Paper in Fire by UP2L8 reviews
Ed loves Roy, and Roy loves . . . Roy.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 31 - Words: 62,509 - Reviews: 413 - Favs: 621 - Follows: 161 - Updated: 12/23/2009 - Published: 10/7/2009 - Edward E., Roy M. - Complete
Sick by Sevlow reviews
Ed is late for his report. Again.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,465 - Reviews: 304 - Favs: 2,162 - Follows: 376 - Published: 11/30/2007 - Roy M., Edward E. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Blue on Blue reviews
Shining Saotome has a good reason for his rule against romance at the Saotome Master School. However, he knows that some lessons are better learned by example. So, will Haruka and Masato learn or, prodigies that they are, persevere? Primarily Haruka/Masato; other pairings will appear. Rating may changed based on chapter contents.
Uta no Prince-sama - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 7 - Words: 22,340 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 11/21/2016 - Published: 5/28/2015 - Haruka N., Masato H., Shining S.
Trouble Maker
The heir to the Hijirikawa Syndicate is bored. This is a dangerous thing.
Crossover - Uta no Prince-sama & Free! - Iwatobi Swim Club - Rated: M - English - Crime/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,104 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 5/21/2016 - Published: 10/28/2015 - Masato H., Ren J., Rin M., Haruka N.
Games without Frontiers - 2015 Remix reviews
What people do on their own time is their own business, right? Royai AU, part one of a series. Hang on, we're going to take a little ride through the life of Roy Mustang & Riza Hawkeye. I blend a little FMA03, gently fold in some FMAB, and liberally sprinkle with various headcanons. Some OOC, because, yeah, circumstances. TWs will be noted. Chapter Ratings will vary and be noted.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 48 - Words: 136,791 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 10/28/2015 - Published: 3/4/2015 - Edward E., Riza H., Roy M.
Ultraviolet reviews
No, it's not political intrigue or alchemical chaos that seeks to topple Roy Mustang from the catbird seat. As if blazing a trail to the top wasn't hard enough, now he must blaze a trail to liberate himself, and others like him, from the preconceptions of the age-old hierarchal system, handed down through the Amestrian bloodlines for generations.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 27,820 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 9/5/2015 - Published: 6/1/2015 - Alphonse E., Edward E., Roy M., OC
Tete-a-tete reviews
He'd forgotten for a second that Haruhi was much requested for her scintillating and insightful conversation.
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,727 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 12 - Published: 5/10/2015 - Haruhi F., Kyōya O., Kaoru H., Hikaru H. - Complete
Les Baisers
A series of drabbles & ficlets. AU Royai. Not really spoilers. Mostly based on 2003 Anime.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 3,310 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/31/2015 - Jean H., Maes H., Riza H., Roy M.
To Play With Fire (One Night in Ishbal 2) reviews
Some people like to play with fire; some people have no choice.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,378 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/26/2015 - Riza H., Roy M.
One Night in Ishbal reviews
One night in Ishbal makes a hard man humble. At one time, she was merely an extension of the machine. Then she was blinded by wildfire. Author's notes: Slight rewrite from 2005, incorporating things from FMAB. No spoilers, I don't think. Saw a small sentence in a character description of Riza, and ran with it. Don't own them; they're not mine.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,554 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/21/2015 - Riza H.
Farm Fresh reviews
Something this rolled off the farm truck and into Roy's lap
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 808 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/9/2015 - Jean H., Roy M.
Fighting Words
Synopsis: Them's is fighting words. Author's Notes: More academy nonsense. They're trying to make it through one more month. Spoilers: None.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,042 - Favs: 1 - Published: 3/8/2015
Bridge
If your friends told you to jump off a bridge, would you?
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,961 - Published: 3/2/2015
Study Time reviews
Homework at the Academy was an education in boredom.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,926 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/1/2015 - Maes H., Roy M. - Complete