Author has written 9 stories for Avengers, Bleach, Harry Potter, Naruto, Katekyo Hitman Reborn!, and Anime X-overs.
If you're reading this, hopefully that means you like my stories. If you don't, why are you reading this?
SOME OF MY FAVOURITES:
I agree that light is the fastest thing in the universe. But why does nobody remember the darkness was there first? Myself.
Should you ever have children, you will love and cherish them every square second, but there will be times where you get the urge to throw them in the wheelie bin. My sister-in-law.
Don't hit him on the head, he doesn't have the brain cells to spare. My mother.
I don't know whether I'm in boarding school or Borstal! My maternal grandmother, after moving into an Alms-house.
My company says that all trucks will be fixed on the first time, 98% of the time. I'm the 2%. My father.
As you've probably gathered from the stories I've written so far, I am a Bleach fan. It was the first anime I watched and will forever have a special place in my heart, despite it's many flaws. It started by me being a Breaking Benjamin fan and clicking on an AMV for the Kenpachi vs Ichigo fight. I thought I'd check it out and I was hooked. I literally binge-watched it.
I have watched most of the anime(got bored halfway through the reigai arc) and watched Tekking101 on Youtube for the manga updates and reviews. Also: Tite Kubo is a massive troll. Damn did Bleach get dark. And the lines were getting cliché. Yes, I went ballistic over the Absolute Zero thing, as well as the (NON-EXISTANT) differences between nerves and cells. Grrrr.
Watched, meh, half of Inuyasha before getting sick of the constant lack of critical thinking and the fact that there are hardly any 'bonding' moments that involve the characters getting to know each other through actually talking. First season of Kuroshitsuji/Black Butler, Naruto, part of One Punch Man(such a novel concept!). Trigun I adore but every time I re-watch it, I can't bring myself to go past Episode 11 because it reminds me how much it's going to go down the drain...*sob*Wolfwood!*sob*.
Fullmetal Alchemist and Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood. I like both equally. FMA spends more time fleshing out the situations, while FMAB has more adventure packed in. Even so, I felt more sad about Maes' death in FMA because the Elrics had more history with him.
First season of Code Geass. I can say nothing other than watch it for yourself.
My absolute favourite anime is Space Pirate Captain Harlock (1978). Or should I say anime multiverse since there are so many official spin-offs. The original is brilliant, just stay far, far away from the dub(DIE, ABOMINATION, DIE!).
Not to mention this anime stands out because it has a scene where a naked woman practically flings herself at the (straight)Captain Harlock in an attempt to seduce him. Not even blushing, he wraps her in his cloak and carries her back to her quarters. He is that awesome that he doesn't need to sleep with anything with breasts to be a dashing rogue.
For reference of awesomeness, please see this quote of Captain Harlock explaining why he flies the Skull-and-Crossbones : "This flag means I shall fight until only my bones remain."
My favourite of the spin-offs is Cosmo Warrior Zero. If it wasn't stuck to only 13 episodes(and a 2-episode Gaiden), I think they could have introduced more of the lore and actually resolved things. It reminds me of Code Geass, but more light-hearted. And the character of Zero is so well written, I think I might have cried during the first episode.
Gravity Falls Everything was just so well done. Praying for a Season 3, like 80% of other Gravity Falls fans, even though I think the ending was done so well, it doesn't need one; like the other 20%.
Transformers Animated Please don't kill me. This is the cartoon that actually got me into the Transformers fandom. Prowl was my favourite character by far, but Ratchet came a close second. I would actually like another season, if only to resolve some of the cliff-hanger questions.
Animals of Farthing Wood I loved this growing up. I even had the audio on cassettes so I could listen to it in the car. Watch if you don't mind (non-graphic) character death.
Danger Mouse (The Original) Imagine if Monty Python decided to do a show that was Batman and Robin meets James Bond, but with animals. The animation is jerky and, frankly, horrible, but the dialogue is sharp and comical. A rarity in these days of toilet humour and inanity.
Asterix and Obelix My bedtime stories for years. I learned to read on the adventures of these two guys. I might have been too young for some of the references but the names and dialogue were so funny it didn't matter. I identified so much with Asterix, while the recurring fat complex with Obelix was always guaranteed a laugh.
Ivor the Engine The small, sweet and paper version of Thomas the Tank Engine. Thomas the Tank Engine always creeped me out because trains weren't supposed to have faces! In Ivor, one small green steam engine interacts with various people living around the railway. All the backgrounds are hand drawn and coloured, as are the puppets. In terms of animation, it's actually more like an animatic, but the voice acting is superb, as are the storylines. Oh, and it has dragons.
All Creatures Great and Small The TV adaption of the book series, showing the life of the WWII-era vet James Herriot from his perspective. The animals have great character and any modern day doctor, vet or social services professional will be able to relate to the troubles of dealing with irritating and difficult clients. Also, Tristan Farnon is played by (a much younger)Peter Davison(the Fifth Doctor Who).
Doctor Who(New Who) I remember watching Season 1 Episode 1 of New Who when it first came out. Christopher Eccleston is, I think, the best Doctor in terms of portraying emotions and story and I think the fact that the show had such a low budget and some mediocre writing at the time really didn't do him any favours. David Tennant is the best Doctor in terms of acting, since it feels like he really threw himself into the role.
Dad's Army A sitcom about Britain's Home Guard. The too old, too young and too important are left to guard Britain's shores during WWII. We have the Walmington-on-Sea platoon. Lead by the small and pompous Captain Mainwaring, the genteel and easy-going Sargent Wilson and overly-enthusiastic OAP veteran Lance Corporal Jones, they get into all sorts of scrapes. Marching along are Scottish miser Private Fraser, mummy's-boy Private Pike, doddery and absent-minded medical orderly Private Godfrey and fast-talking Cockney spiv Private Walker.
Duncton Wood (both trilogies) Not for everyone. Very well written and touching in places. Contains religious themes(all the Jesus allegories!); can't say I didn't warn you. Very dark. Be prepared to stomach genocide, body horror, sexual deviancy(e.g.incest, rape, castration), brainwashing, cults, domestic abuse, mental trauma, abuse of the handicapped and various forms of oppressive dictatorship. Oh, and death. In all unpleasant shapes and sizes.
H.I.V.E (series) If modern villains went to school. No super-powers included, just lots of creepy science - even if Raven seems to have the super-power of not dying no matter what. Funny and well-paced, with plenty of mystery and action. Bit dark in the recent books though. Still furious that it ended(?) on the mother of all cliff-hangers.
Redwall (series) Love these. So many great characters and so much world-building. Imagine if Tolkien and C.S.Lewis decided to collaborate on a kids series. Every book is like a quest, complete with riddles, lost artefacts and approaching peril. Contains completely original riddles and songs and each species has it's own dialect. The world gets bigger every book, and there are several call-backs as you go. Basically, it's like reading the Silmarillion with animals.
Samuel Johnson versus the Devil trilogy/The Infernals : The Gates, Hell's Bells, The Creeps Basically, Dante's Inferno met Hitchhikers Guide to The Galaxy and had a baby. In which a small boy, his dog, two useless demons, two police officers, an ice-cream man and some recaltricant dwarves battle the forces of darkness with only their wits, an ice-cream truck and an Aston Martin.
Ribblestrop (trilogy) The younger, but no less funny, brother of St. Trinians. A school for rejects funded by imagination and spare change, bullied by the police, haunted by a ghost and attended by foreign illegal immigrants of varying nationalities, the son of a Mafia boss, a psychopathic heir to several million dollars, the lonely heir to the Ribblestrop estate, a possible-psychic, a genius, some retired circus animals and only one girl.
Little Darlings (trilogy) A Roald Dahl meets Nanny McPhee romp in a twisted world where sweet, kind-hearted burglars pull the ultimate heists by posing as nannies-for-hire for the obscenely rich. They're somewhat used to their homicidal, sadistic and downright bratty temporary charges, but the Darling children are old hands at getting rid of nannies. Unfortunately, they've stowed away. One's a mechanical prodigy, one's well-versed in baking techniques bordering on the magical(or maybe eldritch) and the other is determined to organize these poor burglar sods. Also featuring a deposed Icelandic royal and his missing teddy bear.
Now, for some funny quotes that are not from fanfictions;
'Millie blinked. "What?"
"But I'm the only girl," said Millie.'
-Return to Ribblestrop, Andy Mulligan
'"Fetbury? Where's that?" asked Dirk. "And what a stupid name. You humans have such stupid names for places, really you do. Why can't you call it Deadbury or something? You know, where the dead are buried - and rise again to serve their evil necromantic masters - hopefully me. Mwah, hah, hah!"'
- Dark Lord A Fiend in Need, Jamie Thomson
'"We have nothing to fear but fear itself," Otto replied. "Oh, and a megalomaniacal headmaster, the world's deadliest assassin, giant mutated plant monsters, an international cartel of super-villains and the security forces of every country on earth, but other than that...just fear."'
- H.I.V.E The Overlord Protocol, Mark Walden
'"Well, gentlemen, I can see that you enjoyed your meal," she said, surveying the empty plates that now sat in front of the two boys, "but we have a big day ahead of us tomorrow so I suggest that you both try to get some sleep."
"Do we get a bedtime story?" Otto asked cheekily.
"Oh yes, of course, I think we'll have one of my favourites; it's called The Little Boy and the Tranquilizer Dart Gun.' Raven smiled in a rather unsettling way.'
- H.I.V.E The Overlord Protocol, Mark Walden
'From a Perfectly Modest cave in the base of a Not Terrible Interesting mountain in a Nothing To See Here, Move Along Now part of Hell, there came the sound of tinkering. Tinkering, as you may be aware, is essentially a male pursuit. Women, by and large, do not tinker, which is why it was a man who originally invented the garden shed and the garage, both of which are basically places to which men can retreat in order to perform tasks that serve no particularly useful purpose other than to give them something to do with their hands that does not involve eating, drinking, or fiddling with the remote control for the television.
- Hell's Bells, John Connolly
Mrs Darling II
- Little Darlings, Sam Llewllyn
TIPS FOR WRITING A STEADY ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP:
(I am using a male/female relationship, but this can be used for homosexual relationships as well.)
No. 1 'Nice' comes second
Our characters must have something in common or a quality that attracts the other. 'He's/She's nice' is not a quality, it's the lack of an outstanding flaw. It's not like you get a crush on someone just because they hold the door for you.
Initial quality -> Some attraction -> First interactions -> Mutual agreement that 'we get along' -> Regular interactions -> Sharing more information about each other
No. 2 We science, but I can't physics
Our two characters must be equal. I don't mean they should be exactly the same at everything, but they should be able to support each other in an area the other isn't so good at. For example, they can both be good at drawing, but only one can paint. They are both average at science, but only one gets chemical formulae. This creates opportunities for our two characters to collaborate on things or introduce themselves to strangers; e.g. 'you want my other half, he's better at that than me', 'I know, she's amazing, isn't she?'
No. 3 I need you
Our two characters must need the other, getting something out of the relationship that they don't have when they are single. This can be emotional support with a depth of trust that you can't get from friends or family, physical protection or simply someone to bounce ideas off of with impunity. If you are getting really confused, remind yourself that you are writing a symbiotic relationship.
No. 3.5 United we stand, divided we fall
Tying into No.3, our two characters must be better together than apart. Dedicate a story arc or at least a few hundred words as to how each character would be worse off without the other. This is usually done by the two characters falling out, being forcibly kept apart, or both; it can be done without these though.
No. 4 Tell me your feelings
Regular communication is a must. Not necessarily sitting down and talking, but our two characters must tell the other their feelings and ideas. Make sure that not all the communication addresses heavy subjects or it will feel like an interrogation; have them tell each other a funny story, what happened in their boring/normal day or that they need to buy more cereal. This makes them relatable, showing the audience that these are real people who go through mundane stuff as well.
No. 5 We kissed, so what?
Small shows of affection as regular things. If our two characters have been in a relationship for a while, things like casual light kisses and holding hands will be routine, not something they blush and stutter over. If two people have been in a relationship for a while and they still make a big deal out of things like that then it will seem insipid and ditzy.
No. 6 I'm not a ghost
This links to 4 and 5. Our two characters shouldn't ignore each other as a matter of fact. They're in a relationship, they should interact on a regular basis. You can get a good small character arc out of how one or both have to adjust to there being someone readily available to trust where there wasn't before. One ignoring the other should be a sign that something's wrong. On the other hand, they shouldn't be needy. They should still be able to go out separately and do different things.
No. 7 He looked at her
Our two characters shouldn't neglect their friends just because they are now in a relationship. Also, they are allowed to have friends of the opposite sex without immediately being a cheater. Getting jealous just because your romantic other is next to a member of the opposite sex without being horrible or indifferent to them is very petty. This can quickly shift into the first, possessive, stages of an unhealthy relationship. Nonetheless, these scenes can be a chance to rebuild any lapses in communication, but this doubt really shouldn't continue past the third occasion at most.
No. 8 Fighting is okay
Couples differ and can do so regularly; fights are allowed to break out. It helps our two characters, as well as the audience, know each other's boundaries. However, fights should only break out after a build up and even then it wouldn't start as full blown anger but rather serious exasperation. From that point, miscommunication or simple errors in judgement could lead to a full fight.
Some of the problems can be settled, sometimes one person must admit that they were wrong, while sometimes our two characters refuse to budge. The first can be done when they work out the solution. The second can be received with good-natured acceptance, while a compromise must be reached in event of the latter.
No. 9 If all else fails...
Everyone has flaws.
Friends like you in spite of those flaws.
Partners love you because of those flaws.
How I Write Romance
I have nothing against Yaoi/Yuri, but I find it much easier to write straight romance. Some of my characters may even be asexual like myself.
In real life, it's incredibly rare for someone to stay with one person from the get-go. In that I mean that they will have a few crushes/boyfriends/girlfriends before they settle on what they want in their love-life.
I've always been of the opinion that hugging and other such friendly social motions, doesn't have romantic connotations. Of course, you may have different views depending on your culture and upbringing. Nevertheless, my characters tend to reflect my own views, especially if it correlates well with their universe. So, you can expect to see some cuddly or touchy-feely non-romantic relationships in my stories.
My Issues with Fanfiction Romance:
What Romance Do I Like?
The Stairs of Sand Progress Diaries
'Huh, all the signs here in Cornwall have a Cornish translation, but I've never heard of a Cornish Gaelic. Cornwall was practically a separate country from the rest of England, it's got it's own separate folklore and everything...Northern Kaze no Kuni! Maybe it stretches North to the Arctic circle and I can have different ethnicities and minority cultures!'
'THE MOON. The rock had to come from somewhere!'
'I wonder where Hagoromo and Hamura lived? Hagoromo at least should have had a house if he was raising two kids. And possibly had a wife/partner.'
'SLANG. Northern Kaze no Kuni slang.'
'Hey, lemme see if I can get up a map of the Naruto world...why are they all different? Oh, I see, these are fanon maps, but I want a canon map...that's it?! But that's only, like, a quarter of a continent...*evil cackling* I CAN MAKE MY OWN!'
'This software called Autorealm is actually kind of okay for map drawing...IT DOES COASTLINE FOR YOU, THIS IS AMAZING!'
'Half of the countries on the canon map aren't even named, that was just lazy. Time to wiki all the countries in Naruto and do my best to match them up.'
'Man, Kishimoto had no imagination when he named all of these places.'
Rewatches Wave Arc* 'Huh, are those mangrove trees I see when they take the boat over? And that curve on the map coastline could signify a pretty sweet delta...mangroves for everyone!'
'If Takigakure really is hidden in waterfalls, that's gotta be some pretty big waterfalls. But they've got quite a lot of underground pools as well...Angel falls meets the cenotes of the Yucatan peninsula, I guess.'
'The Summons have to live somewhere. Well, it's not like the rest of that random continent is being used.
'~Naming all the seafronts~Thank you Autorealm autoname generator~'
Now, let's go down this long list of villages and put them all on.
Dammit Orochimaru, go had to go and build five bases, didn't you?
POLITICAL MAP IS UP. ONE OF MY MONSTER BABIES HAS BEEN BIRTHED SCREAMING INTO THE WORLD!