I am quite fond of reading - which has lead many of my class mates and friends over the years to ask just how many books I have read in my entire life. Which, in turn, has also led to my less than polite answer, "How the hell should I know?" I read whenever I can. I don't read when I'm studying or working, when I'm writing, when I'm sleeping, and when I'm playing tennis, another hobby of mine - though I have found out you can play tennis whle holding an open umbrella. (Don't ask.) Otherwise, it's pretty much all read. I even read while I'm on the internet most of the time.

One pet peeve of mine is people who don't read that often asking me why I read the same books over and over again. Isn't that the point of buying a book, or getting it out from the library? You don't do it just to read it once, and then never look at it again. You read it again because you enjoy it. If you like a film you don't just watch it once, if you like a piece of music you don't listen to it once. It's the same with books, it's like meeting an old friend. (That's what my mum calls the books we've had since I was little and pick off the shelves to read once more: 'old friends'.)

Things I have always wanted to say, but probably never will, because I've filched them from various sources:

When my mental processes are questioned:

Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops. (Arsenic and Old Lace.)

When people say the man is the head of a household or a business or some such thing:

Let me tell you something...the man is the head, but the woman is the neck, and she can turn the head any way she wants.(My Big Fat Greek Wedding.)

To everyone who aborts their baby because it's the wrong gender: More people would have babies if they came with free garlic bread. (Third rock from the sun.)

To anyone who is racist or generally annoyed by the fact that Jesus might have been anything other than white:

White folks only want to hear the good shit: life eternal, a place in God's Heaven. But as soon as they hear they're getting this good shit from a black Jesus, they freak. And that, my friends, is called hypocrisy. A black man can steal your stereo, but he can't be your Savior. You gonna eat that hash brown? (Dogma)

To anyone who is anti-semitic or violently opposed to other religions:

How odd of God to choose the Jews/ but not so odd as those who choose a Jewish god yet spurn the Jews. (William Norman Ewer, reply generally considered to be written by Cecil Brown or Ogden Nash.)

If I could make one speech with an echoing voice and glowing eyes and generally looking as if I'd been possessed by a demon, this would be it:

Evil is an abstract! It's a human construct! But true to his irresponsible nature, Man won't hold up to being its engineer, so he blames his dark deeds on my ilk! But it's not enough to shadow his own existence, no; he turned Hell into a suffering pit. And why? Because it is beyond your abilities to simply make personal recompence for the sins you commit. No, you choose rather to invent a psycho drama, and dwell in a foundless belief that God will never forgive your grievous offences! So you bring your guilt and your inner decay with you to Hell, where the whored imagination of so many gluttons for punishment gave birth to the sickness that has infected the abyss since the first one of your kind arrived there, begging to be punished! And in doing so, they have transformed the cold and solitude to pain and misery. I' ve spent aeons privy to the flames, inhaling the decay, hearing the wail of the damned. I know what effect such horrors have on the delicate psyche of an angelic being! (Dogma)

Finally, a quick overview of some of my more popular stories, for those of you who for some reason aren't drawn in by the sparse descriptions:

L'epoux cadavre - My sister and I went to see A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, and watching the trailers before the film we saw the trailer for Corpse Bride, and since we were practically the only two in a dark theatre, we were rather freaked by it. I was in the middle of my Phantom of the Opera obsession at the time, and that night as I lay awake, I began to wonder what it would be like if I wrote a crossover between the two...

And the rest, as they say, is history. (It's the first major writing project I've ever finished. Sniff. I'm so proud...)

Ill met by moonlight: Inspired by Asenath's A Savage place. Hellsing, after Incognito's attack, has to cope with evil faeries in Ireland. Hopefully better than it sounds. Couples are sketchy, though people seem to like the interaction between Seras and Pip.

Flowers of the Citadel - I've revamped it a few times since starting it back in 2005, but the story remains basically the same: the fairly typical 'Boromir and Faramir have a sister' plot, one that people often use for Mary-Sues. The difference is that people say they like my character. I like her too, even though she's skanky. And kinda gay. (Guess where I got that from!) As I've said somewhere else but can't remember exactly where, she's the result of my brainchild concerning what would happen if Denethor would raise a daughter, considering how he did with his sons. Unfortunately, this project is dead in the water.

Children of the blue sky - Anyone who has read The Red Tent by Anita Diamant - the story of Jacob (of biblical fame)'s four wives and his only daughter - will recognise its influence upon this particular work. This story was started not only to defend my theory that not everyone from Rhun was evil, but also to try and make believable OCs and work with all the ideas that Tolkien never had time or inclination to expand upon, including the part that certain people had to play in the War of the Ring...

...and that's all I'm saying. When it gets longer you'll see what I mean.

The Blood is the Life - In a nutshell, it's Star Trek rebooted, with vampires who definitely don't sparkle but who do drink blood. And quite a lot of it.

Of Empire Lines and Pointed Ears: Star Trek again; Amanda Grayson and Sarek are basically Elizabeth Bennet and Mr Darcy. 'nuff said.

If you're interested, here also is my tumblr: