Epyon the Bored
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Joined 01-06-05, id: 734877, Profile Updated: 12-02-09
Author has written 5 stories for Hellsing, Evangelion, and Star Wars.

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A Trail a Mile Wide by Heuksal reviews
Shepard didn't get much of a chance to celebrate after ruining Sovereign's day, and the SR2's crew could really use a break after the end of ME2. Minor postgame spoilers, Femshep and Garrus, mostly dialog, gratuitous nerdy in-jokes.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,685 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 496 - Follows: 55 - Published: 2/12/2010 - Shepard (F), Garrus V. - Complete
Shinji's bad day in life by MyWay reviews
Welcome to Shinji's bad day in life. You think your life sucks? Read and feel relieved, that others have a worse life than you'll ever have. TAADAA, UPDATED! Thought I was dead, you were? Brain-dead, maybe... but no one can stop me... NO ONE! MUAHAHAHAH
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 37,596 - Reviews: 129 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 11/1/2009 - Published: 7/1/2004 - Shinji I.
Forgotten Warriors by Legato Deathscythe reviews
Unit01 Left Earth after Third Impact was avoided. Now the Beast has awakened from it's long slumber to complete it's final mission. At the Dawn of the Third Age of Mankind.
Crossover - Babylon 5 & Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 39,360 - Reviews: 170 - Favs: 176 - Follows: 197 - Updated: 5/9/2009 - Published: 3/7/2003 - Shinji I.
The Effects Of Puberty by YoungBoch reviews
RETURNING STORY! What was it like as Shinji and Asuka went through puberty? I wonder...
Evangelion - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 77,805 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 79 - Updated: 7/15/2008 - Published: 11/30/2006 - Shinji I., Asuka L. S.
Life Goes On by funvince reviews
Third Impact was prevented. The world didn't end. It has been six months since NERV was disbanded. Months of therapy had prepared Shinji Ikari for a new life. He finally felt prepared to face the girl he couldn't forget. Rei Ayanami.
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 40,891 - Reviews: 311 - Favs: 439 - Follows: 184 - Updated: 12/19/2007 - Published: 6/9/2005 - Shinji I., Rei A. - Complete
Neon Genesis Evangelion: Advent of the Demons by The Shadow Walker reviews
...Revised. Recommend rereading for minor changes... After the End, everything was reborn but only to face the true threat to Humanity. Now, the Eva pilot face the onslaught of beings they know as Demons, who want to deal Humanity a fate worse than death.
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 94,804 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 9/20/2007 - Published: 6/18/2004
Competition can be Murder by Mister Cynical reviews
Whoever said war was hell, has never seen the competition in the video game industries. In a strange twist of fate Shinji Ikari has found himself at the center of the madness. Now he must carry out his job as Sony's top 'intercompany relations' specialist
Evangelion - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 29,993 - Reviews: 169 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 12/22/2006 - Published: 6/24/2005 - Complete
The Cubicle Adventures by Merridian reviews
Imagine an Evangelion universe without the biomechanical robots or entry plugs. Imagine if the biblical references didn't involve massive aliens. Imagine if everything was restricted to something even more confining than a plug suit: the cubicle.
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 26,507 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 110 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 9/2/2006 - Published: 7/25/2006 - Shinji I. - Complete
Something Awful This Way Comes by Adam Kadmon reviews
Cliches aplenty. Gathering the fandom's standards into a worthless heap of trash. Even worse than it sounds.
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,118 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/14/2006 - Complete
Promises, Revised by Akodo Tim reviews
Loosely based on the first 'Girlfriend of Steel' game. Mana's dream of becoming a pilot becomes a nightmare. C&C appreciated.
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 5 - Words: 27,115 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 4/22/2006 - Published: 5/14/2004 - Shinji I., Mana K.
Rebirth of Genesis by Mr. Logan reviews
Things become more complicated with the rise of an enemy who, unbeknownst to Shinji or Asuka, is really a comrade. Can either of them sense this betrayal? R&R Please! CH. 16 IS FINALLY UP!
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 16 - Words: 115,296 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 4/17/2006 - Published: 8/8/2004 - Shinji I., Asuka L. S.
Office Repair Blues by Dark McCloud reviews
Alucard and Walter get sentenced to repairing Integra's office after one of Alucards crazy stunts destroys it. Walter and Alucard OOCness galore. Ch4 is up what will the mismatched office repair team do when they go to assemble Integra's new furniture an
Hellsing - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,887 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 3/19/2006 - Published: 10/11/2005
Folded Wings by Random1377 reviews
Philosophical questions are only hard to answer if they are asked in the first place. A story of the First Child. Complete
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 29 - Words: 79,989 - Reviews: 436 - Favs: 165 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 3/4/2006 - Published: 4/25/2005 - Rei A. - Complete
Youth and Innocence by J Luc Pitard reviews
An exploration of the early days of Integra's Hellsing. Violence and Language warnings. Completed Story
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 17 - Words: 56,130 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 3/1/2006 - Published: 11/19/2005 - Complete
A Day in the Life of by Somewhere NofA reviews
A day in the mundane existence of one Shinji Ikari. Watch as everyone's favourite antihero suffers through the indignities of his daily life. Looking for an epic literary masterpiece? Go read something else.
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 18,372 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 1/20/2006 - Published: 1/4/2006 - Asuka L. S., Shinji I. - Complete
The Imperial Officer's Guide to Success by Ldihawk reviews
A selfhelp book for Imperial Officers how to get ahead and stay alive!
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 6,421 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 11/18/2005 - Published: 8/21/2005 - Darth Vader
Saucy Young Filly by Sunoko reviews
Once upon a time, when war surrounded them, a young princess met an evil vampire. One shot, no pairings, premanga. Edited because I hate typos.
Hellsing - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,660 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Updated: 11/16/2005 - Published: 11/15/2005 - Complete
Clean Up Duty by MidnightCereal reviews
Somebody hit me in the head with a rock...and voila! One Shot.
Evangelion - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,537 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/16/2005 - Complete
The Therapist by CSENTIMENTAL VALYOU reviews
Remember that girl who always worked hard to make sandwiches and clean up other peoples messes even though she got other people to do it. No it's not your Mom, It's Hikari, and in this episode the sandwichlover takcles The Therapist in the seventh chapter
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 7 - Words: 12,455 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 10/8/2005 - Published: 6/28/2005
Broken by Seamok reviews
Prequel to Red Tears. A story on Rei's self-discovery.
Evangelion - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 3 - Words: 18,058 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 10/1/2005 - Published: 11/15/2004
Best Kept Secret by Loyal Integra Fanboy reviews
The Best Kept Secret is not, as some would believe, the vampire Alucard. In fact it has four wheels, goes very fast, and has just been found by Alucard...
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,884 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/29/2005
Rokubungi Legacies by Blob-like Substance reviews
The long line of Rokubungi, corrupted leaders backed by hidden committees now fall onto the shoulders of Shinji Ikari. How has Third Impact affected him? Assess my abilities and help me through this writing. SxA!
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 18 - Words: 77,948 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 9/18/2005 - Published: 8/23/2005 - Shinji I., Asuka L. S.
The Courier Droid by ImperialJedi reviews
PreROTJ. This is a short story about a mousebot and its adventures on the SSD Executer. Written in Y2K, it has been posted with minimal editing from the original. Main Characters: Admiral Piett, Darth Vader, and MSE Courier Droid
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,737 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 9/13/2005 - Published: 8/24/2005 - Darth Vader - Complete
Passio Secundum Tabris Angeli by Haziel reviews
Kaworu ponders... for that is all he can do at the time.
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,460 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 4 - Published: 9/10/2005 - Kaworu N., Shinji I.
Hellsing Goes To The Movies by wankydoodle reviews
A series of Hellsing fics inspired by da movies. FINALLY UPDATED! All for one bloody ring...LOL.
Hellsing - Rated: K - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 9 - Words: 14,370 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 8/28/2005 - Published: 7/6/2005
Shinji Just Snaps and Totally Wales on Everything by MidnightCereal reviews
The world's only three part one shot. More fun than getting kicked in the teeth!
Evangelion - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 19,181 - Reviews: 129 - Favs: 438 - Follows: 113 - Updated: 8/12/2005 - Published: 7/30/2005 - Complete
Boss Ikari by lawless priest reviews
summary: Shinji and the eva cast run a mob squad and work to take over the yakuza, triads and just about everyone else.
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 45,897 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 7/26/2005 - Published: 7/19/2004
Temptation Island? by Scarabeye3000 reviews
A vacation set by Commander Ikari. Will a scenario unfold? COMPLETE w a buzzing epilogue
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 47,584 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 7/18/2005 - Published: 6/29/2004 - Shinji I. - Complete
The Orphan of Hellsing by Omega Z reviews
Family killed by freaks, Marcus does all he can to get back at their killers with the Hellsing bunch.
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 34,347 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 7/1/2005 - Published: 12/18/2004
Gendo's Monster by YamiPaladinofChaos reviews
The sins of the father give birth to a monster in the son.
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 777 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/16/2005 - Complete
February Ice by the Black Rose reviews
HYRP, set after Midnight Chimes. Heero said he would stay, but... 'A politician, a young, female, politician should not have a boyfriend with an alias'... 'Relena, my commanding officer is blocking my transfer to Earth.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,218 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/20/2005 - Heero Y., Relena P. - Complete
Midnight Chimes and Pink Roses by the Black Rose reviews
Set after Santa Baby.'There was something wrong about me that everyone else could see, but that somehow I missed when I glanced in the mirror. People who weren't close to me could claim to love me as the public figure I had become. But it was just a mask.
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,550 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 5/13/2005 - Published: 4/27/2005 - Heero Y., Relena P. - Complete
Guilt Reflex by MonsterBrat reviews
Shinji takes a look at Eva 01 and wonders who actually controls it. In the end, the experience doesn't really help.
Evangelion - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,173 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 5/6/2005 - Shinji I. - Complete
Snip Snip by Tazo reviews
They say that we only really tell the truth to three people. Our psychatrist. Our priest. And our barber.
Hellsing - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 6,396 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 5/2/2005 - Published: 2/2/2005
Red Tears by Seamok reviews
Rei was suffering from low self-esteem after being constantly abused by Gendo. Shinji and Asuka found out but how could they help? A sad story about Rei's struggle and tragic life. (Complete)
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 125,403 - Reviews: 411 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 4/19/2005 - Published: 8/12/2004 - Complete
Send in the Rei's by Kindled Chime reviews
When Rei confesses she does not know how to have fun Shinji considers it his duty to teach her. He doesn't know why Asuka insists on tagging along though...
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 58,886 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 3/21/2005 - Published: 2/16/2005
Nightmares by Tazo reviews
They're always there. Hiding on the edge of our subconcious. Always ready to pounce. But really, do they have any more power than what we give them? PxS. Semi-spoilers for volume 7
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,356 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 14 - Published: 3/3/2005
Friday Night Ritual by Tazo reviews
Seras and Pip learn the perils of an overactive imagination and prying too deeply into your employer's affairs.
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,307 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/26/2004
The Conspiracy of the Pink Limo by Prolificus reviews
At last we find out the truth about that blasted pink limo. Are you man enough to venture where no man has ventured before? Need a good laugh? You'll have several! This is my sorry attempt at humor. [One-Shot]
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 958 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 2 - Published: 4/29/2004 - Complete
Hearts or Diamonds? by Roja-Cyd reviews
Eight years after the manga, Akane is a 'delivery girl' and she's left Ranma behind. Her newest assignment, however, will bring some dangerous people against her. Can she go it alone? RxA
Ranma - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 56,999 - Reviews: 422 - Favs: 209 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 10/23/2003 - Published: 4/24/2002 - Ranma, Akane - Complete
Life's Little Escapes by Patches reviews
EVA-01 wants a vacation. Unfortunately, an apathetic pilot, a vengeful Second Child, and its own naivette are standing in its way. What's a mech gotta do to have some fun once in a while? (unfinished)
Evangelion - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,161 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 6 - Published: 6/28/2003
Contemplation. by Jingu reviews
*2 Chapters Added. Finished* Alucard's POV. His musings and talks with his Master. Spoiler ahead, ... maybe. Beware of OOC-ness, perhaps, ah, just R&R, eh heh
Hellsing - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,588 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 3 - Updated: 5/5/2002 - Published: 3/5/2002
Shinji Huntin' Season! by Raiden X reviews
The girls of Shinji's class turns on him as a potential boyfriend, and the competition is brutal. Upgraded to 'R' due to too much lime *Chapter 5 uploaded at last!
Evangelion - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 17,919 - Reviews: 209 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 3/10/2002 - Published: 5/19/2001
Briathar by Tomorrow reviews
An interesting piece, narrated by Trowa, in which he reflects on dialogue and Heero and Relena's relationship (1xR).
Gundam Wing/AC - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,257 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/17/2001
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

NERV Psychiatric Ward reviews
The NERV Facility is being turned into said psychiatric hospital. As the story progresses, many other universes get dumped in, some who have mental problems, but mostly because the author felt like it. Warning! It's rated M for a reason.
Evangelion - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 18,117 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 2 - Updated: 8/4/2006 - Published: 6/22/2005
Super Star Destroyer! reviews
A little series of random junk about the real nutcases of the Star Wars universe: The captains of the really, REALLY big ships. Created as something to do while my brain works on other stuff.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,254 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 1/16/2006 - Published: 10/13/2005
Your Orders are to SLOWDANCE! II: The Sequel reviews
Years after the original events, the Queen summons the characters of our favorite violent anime to a ball, and the bad Eva puns begin. The world is screwed. NOT a oneshot. REVIEW ME!
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,300 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/22/2005 - Complete
Neon Genesis Budweiserelion reviews
The Beer Empire attacks Tokyo 3. Pretty much self explanatory...Rating for alcohol reference and minor sexual content. Oneshot.
Evangelion - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 920 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/13/2005 - Complete
Your Orders are to SLOWDANCE! reviews
It's absolute perversity as 18yearold Integra can't find a date to the prom, and is forced to resort to ordering Alucard to take her out. But then Pantless Paul comes with Bad Eva Pun. And all of Integra's virgin crapLIES! Oneshot.
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,455 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 3 - Published: 3/10/2005 - Complete