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Joined 01-06-05, id: 735037
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Alright, due to popular demand, here are the actual lists from All I want is Everything...

101 Ways To Annoy People

1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."
5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen.
7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.
8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub".
10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies.
11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
12. Sniffle incessantly.
13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
14. Name your dog "Dog” and your Cat ‘cat’.

15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."
17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."
18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".
19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."
20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol.
21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person."
26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy."
27. Wear a special hip holster for your
remote control.
28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.
29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
31. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.
32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
34. Drum on every available surface.
35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.
37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.
38. Sew anti-theft detector strips into peoples backpacks.
39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
41. Set alarms for random times.
42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving.
44. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.
45. Honk and wave to strangers.
46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange.
47. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.
48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.
49. Wear your pants backwards.
50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.
51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"
53. only type in lowercase.
54. dont use any punctuation either
55. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
56. Pay for your dinner with pennies.
57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.
58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.
60. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories.
61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now."
62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.
63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.
64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.
65. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador."
66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
67. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.
68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."
69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
71. Pretend your computer's mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.
72. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
73. Drive half a block.
74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
75. Ask people what gender they are.
76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back.
77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.
78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".
79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song.
80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet.
81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
82. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.
83. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."
84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.
86. Wear a LOT of cologne.
87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."
88. Sing along at the opera.
89. Mow your lawn with scissors.
90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"
91. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend."
92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."
94. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."
95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.
96. Never make eye contact.
97. Never break eye contact.
98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.
99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.
100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.
101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.

And another on just for fun...

If you're going to go down, go down with style. Failing your final exam can actually be an amusing experience, depending on what you make of it. Here are some suggestions...

If you're going to go down, go down with style. Failing your final exam can actually be an amusing experience, depending on what you make of it. Here are some suggestions...

Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say "oh geez, better get cracking" and do some gibberish work. Turn it in a few minutes early.

Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!"

If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be creative. Use the integral symbol.

Make paper airplanes out of the exam. Aim them at the instructor's left nostril.

Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.

Bring cheerleaders.

Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minutes into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?"

Bring a Game Boy (or Game Gear, etc...). Play with the volume at max level.

On the answer sheet (book, whatever) find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.

Bring pets.

Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.

Fifteen minutes into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every fifteen minutes.

Do the exam with crayons, paint, or fluorescent markers.

Come into the exam wearing a pair of birkenstocks, and nothing else.

Come down with a BAD case of Tourette's Syndrome during the exam. Be as vulgar as possible.

Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up! For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals.

Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.

As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.

Walk into the exam with an entourage. Claim you are going to be taping your next video during the exam. Try to get the instructor to let them stay, be persuasive. Tell the instructor to expect a percentage of the profits if they are allowed to stay.

Every five minutes, stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam.

Turn in the exam approximately 30 minutes into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.

Do the entire exam as if it was multiple choice and true/false. If it is a multiple choice exam, spell out
interesting things (DCCAB, BABE, etc..).

Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.

Get the exam. Twenty minutes into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out "Screw this!" and walk out triumphantly.

Arrange a protest before the exam starts (i.e. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink).

Show up completely drunk. (Completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you start to hold your mouth and make "I'm about to bring something up" sounds.).

Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!"

Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.

Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 minutes, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away.

Go to an exam for a class you have no clue about, where you know the class is very small, and the instructor would recognize you if you belonged. Claim that you have been to every lecture. Fight for your right to take the exam.

Upon receiving the exam, look it over, while laughing loudly, say "you don't really expect me to waste my time on this drivel? Days of our Lives is on!"

Bring a water pistol with you. Nuff said.

From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.

Start a brawl in the middle of the exam.

If the exam is math/science related, make up the longest proofs you could possibly think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations.

Come in wearing a full knight's outfit, complete with sword and shield.

Bring a friend to give you a back massage the entire way through the exam. Insist this person is needed, because you have bad circulation.

Bring cheat sheets FROM ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out, too) and staple them to the exam with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit."

When you walk in, complain about the heat. Strip.

After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.

One word: Wrestlemania.

Bring balloons, blow them up, start throwing them around like they do before concerts start.

Try to get people in the room to do the wave.

Play Frisbee with a friend at the other side of the room.

Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.

Get deliveries of candy, flowers, balloons, telegrams, etc... sent to you every few minutes throughout the exam.

During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach.

Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards at a 90 degree angle.

Bring a musical instrument with you, play various tunes. If you are asked to stop, say "it helps me think." Bring a copy of the Student Handbook with you, challenging the instructor to find the section on musical instruments during finals. Don't forget to use the phrase "Told you so".

Answer the exam with the "Top Ten Reasons Why My Professor Sucks".

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Keep the Faith by Lost Enchanter reviews
Draco Malfoy has kidnapped Ginny Weasley, but what does he want? Is it just Ginny, or does Malfoy seem a little... desperate? Post HBP
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 73,710 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 4/10/2018 - Published: 12/4/2006 - Draco M., Ginny W.
Somewhere in Time by Serpent In Red reviews
Sent back in time by a mysterious person and trapped in the past with a missing Dumbledore and an overbearing, charismatic Dark Lord, they had no idea how much they could dabble with before the world they had known shattered into pieces.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 63 - Words: 360,029 - Reviews: 3064 - Favs: 2,845 - Follows: 1,878 - Updated: 12/31/2013 - Published: 8/27/2008 - Hermione G., Voldemort, Tom R. Jr. - Complete
The Whispered Truth by SunnyStorms reviews
Ginny Weasley had finally grown up. That little girl who dreamed of a fairytale wedding with her one true prince was gone. And good riddance. She didn't care about any of that now. No, really, she didn't.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 21,418 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 145 - Updated: 12/19/2013 - Published: 9/21/2012 - [Draco M., Ginny W.]
Crossing into Chaos by Emeraleyes reviews
In a world where Voldemort was never defeated, only pureblood, money and power matter. All that Ginny Weasley wanted was to survive in this pretentious world, but she ends up crossing a line and capatapulting herself into Draco Malofy's chaotic world.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 199,380 - Reviews: 1058 - Favs: 745 - Follows: 727 - Updated: 11/18/2012 - Published: 4/30/2006 - Draco M., Ginny W.
The Man Who Ripped Apart the World by Emeraleyes reviews
He was supposed to be their hero. He was supposed to bring about the new era of harmony and peace in their world. But when the revolution came, and the tenuous peace he'd worked hard to earn - for all of them - dissipated like smoke. He was supposed to be their hero. But he was only a man. A man who betrayed them all. A man who ripped apart the world.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,809 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 8/19/2012 - Published: 6/10/2012 - Draco M., Ginny W.
Payback by Luthina reviews
"Malfoy!" "Weasel?" "Could you do me the biggest favor of my life?" "Depends, what is it? Will you pay me?" "I'll give you five Galleons. All I need is for you to kiss me; right here, right now." GD, Alternate 6th year.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 53,582 - Reviews: 667 - Favs: 384 - Follows: 198 - Updated: 6/10/2012 - Published: 6/21/2004 - Ginny W., Draco M. - Complete
Blood and Cherries by rain and leaves reviews
It's Ginny's sixth year, the war is over, and life is back to normal . . . until she wakes up in a bed with green hangings. TRGW, HPGW, DMGW, rated for language, implied sex and violence. Don't be scared off by the number of chapters, many are short.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 48 - Words: 84,113 - Reviews: 244 - Favs: 143 - Follows: 127 - Updated: 4/29/2012 - Published: 1/12/2004 - Ginny W., Tom R. Jr.
Century Maker by Emertheawesome reviews
Hermione goes back to save one man - and the world.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,062 - Reviews: 167 - Favs: 914 - Follows: 166 - Published: 9/9/2011 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Civil Twilight by blackmarketmusic reviews
Starting from the events that took place during episode 6, "Civil Twilight" revolves around a threatening organization willing to do anything to overthrow the supernatural in Mystic Falls; and an evolving romance between Damon/Elena.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 18,966 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 71 - Updated: 5/19/2010 - Published: 11/7/2009 - Damon S., Elena G.
Life After Death and Everything Else by Salemsoriginal99 reviews
Sequel to Drift. Draco's come back after eleven years of being completely absent and he's now stepping up to take a bigger role in the life of the girl he left behind. But the past has a funny way of coming back to haunt you...
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 32 - Words: 163,927 - Reviews: 244 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 87 - Updated: 3/31/2010 - Published: 11/15/2008 - Draco M., Ginny W.
The Note by Porcelain.Heart reviews
After a party held by the Slytherin's in the common room in honor of their wonderus win the RavenclawSlytherin match, strange things start happening, and Pansy Parkinson is stuck in the middle of it all. A tale about romance and hate.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 29,914 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 4/8/2009 - Published: 1/1/2006 - Pansy P., Draco M.
Meet Me by the Water by underneaththetree reviews
“I will let you go as soon as you enlighten me as to whose death you were fortunate enough to see.” “Fortunate?” she laughed a bit hysterically, “Fortunate, Riddle? Why would seeing another’s death be fortunate?” TRHG
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 27,824 - Reviews: 141 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 117 - Updated: 3/16/2009 - Published: 6/4/2007 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr.
Circles by The Creatress reviews
COMPLETE! During her first year, Ginny did something, and it's been haunting her for the past six years. She has something of Voldemort's, something that Hermione has helped her hide, but what happens when Voldemort comes back to claim what is his?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 74,593 - Reviews: 296 - Favs: 225 - Follows: 149 - Updated: 1/2/2009 - Published: 4/27/2007 - Voldemort, Ginny W. - Complete
One Journey by PotterAnon reviews
A series of shortish drabbles from various stages of Draco and Ginny’s relationship. Hey, what can I say? I’m in the mood for something soppysmutty… WARNING: SEX AND SWEARING SCENES.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 14,549 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 12/6/2007 - Published: 8/30/2006 - Draco M., Ginny W. - Complete
Plan B by MaraBoBara reviews
COMPLETE! Written hurriedly for Pud’s Great Draco & Ginny Fic Contest 2007. A simple game in the Gryffindor tower turns into a complex heist, but in the end, whose heart will be stolen? DMGW and just a smidgen of BZLL. Rated M for sexual situations.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 10,835 - Reviews: 141 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 8/9/2007 - Published: 4/18/2007 - Draco M., Ginny W. - Complete
Scotland v Ireland by hic hiccup hic reviews
it's the QWC, Scotland vs. Ireland. She was called 'fire on a broom.' He was the accidental heartbreaker. they started out as rivals, fighting for the Quidditch World cup. In the end, they find themselves fighting for eachother.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 26,631 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 77 - Updated: 3/19/2007 - Published: 4/17/2006 - Draco M., Ginny W.
Divided We Stand, United We Fall by Istalindar reviews
Sequel to Light in the Dark. Hermione deals with Draco's abandonment and starts to move on with her life, with new friends, a new identity, and a new mission in life: finding answers.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 51,941 - Reviews: 132 - Favs: 170 - Follows: 63 - Updated: 1/31/2007 - Published: 9/6/2006 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
The Other Side of Simple by Fairies reviews
DMHG. No serious plot, really. A secret affair is conducted behind the walls of Hogwarts. There might be some snogging, some sneaking and some jealousy. And throw in Ginny Weasley and Blaise Zabini for good fun.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 11,341 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 12/20/2006 - Published: 10/15/2006 - Draco M., Hermione G.
Say Goodnight, Not Goodbye by LilyK reviews
COMPLETE. In her 4th year, Ginny used a drunk Draco for revenge against her ex. What she didn't know was that she would lose her virginity that night and be the only one to remember it. Now its 2 years later. DG RHr HOc
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 34 - Words: 115,337 - Reviews: 1449 - Favs: 673 - Follows: 193 - Updated: 5/10/2006 - Published: 6/26/2004 - Ginny W., Draco M. - Complete
What No One Knew by eliana-moran reviews
COMPLETE Ginevra Weasley surprised everyone she knew. She became a death eater. Was there more to her story than met the eye? Warning:contains reference to selfinflicted wounds
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 25 - Words: 45,621 - Reviews: 104 - Favs: 158 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 10/5/2005 - Published: 9/27/2005 - Ginny W., Draco M. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

All I want is everything reviews
It's for your own good, for your own protection.' She was tired of his selfsacrifices and his excuses. So she'd date the entire Slytherin house actually, only the guys. She'd handled Tom Riddle, so it'd be fine... till he came back DMGW
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,032 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 2/28/2006 - Published: 2/3/2006 - Draco M., Ginny W.
Morals in regards to cheating reviews
Ginny was tired of the perfectness. The photo shoots, the looking good for the public, the being sent away for her 'protection'. But mostly she was bored. So she left. Packed her trunk, took the owl and the dog, and left.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,327 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/27/2006 - Ginny W., Draco M.
Happily never after reviews
Post Hogwarts, Draco and Ginny are married, and Harry is mad. Not CLICHE! I promise because I hate cliche things, tee hee Harry decides to embark on a mission, with rather, funny results
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,218 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 12/22/2005 - Published: 9/18/2005 - Draco M., Ginny W.
Dèja vu reviews
Someone's getting close to Harry who shouldn't be, Hermione spending more time in the library, only she isn't, and Ginny finding a certain diary. HPOC, HGDM, GWTR, RW?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 23,912 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 12/22/2005 - Published: 6/21/2005 - Draco M., Hermione G.