Author has written 14 stories for Edgar Allan Poe, and Radio Dramas.
Adventures in Odyssey--if you haven't heard it, you are missing out. This is the fandom I am writing right now, focusing on Jason. Why? He is awesome.
TV shows: Star Trek. Doctor Who
The Walking Dead, Outlander
LOST, the X-files, Lois and Clark, Stargate, Supernatural, Prison Break, Monk, Psych, City Hunter, Twin Peaks, Community, the Office, Defiance
Avatar:the Last Airbender, Tron: Uprising, Fairy Tail
Get Smart, Green Acres, Leave it to Beaver, Hogan's Heroes, Cheyenne, the Prisoner, the Invaders, Man from Uncle ...
Miniseries: Tenth Kingdom, Tin Man, Alice, the Idiot (Russian)
I love Lord of the Rings, book and movie.
movies-- Lawrence of Arabia, Pirates of the Caribbean, The Dark Knight/Rises, Star Wars, Galaxy Quest,
books/authors-- CS Lewis, Tolkien, Kafka, Dostoyevsky, Flannery O'Connor, Max Brand, Diana Wynne Jones
Harry Potter series, Series of Unfortunate Events, Hunger Games, John Carter series
Girlster93 (Tumblr) drew the cover for my latest story, Generation.
TigerShadow (TigerintheShadows on ) drew Jason and Connie for my avatar and some covers for my stories.
Possible spoilers also response t anonChapter
Chapter 31 up! I wonder if anyyone likes this story... Now the foundation is faulty too. :(
almost a month... better than before i suppose. 10,000 words, no wonder the chapters take me a while. When I'm actively working on them.
I posted Chapter 30. Wow, 30 chapters! I think I'll edit it some more-- you'll probably tell if you catch the unedited version (not that I didn't edit but didn't re edit the whole thing before I posted... I'm in a posting mood today, posted 3 of my regular novel)
I've been working on Chapter 29 for the past few weeks and now it's up! it's been 8 months. that's long... at least I'm getting to it now. I want to keep going till i finish it. 5 years, that's crazy. though I did read a fanfic once that went 10 years... this is a long novel, it's going over 120k words, I didn't foresee it would be this long. Now I may accelerate it a bit, now that they have a possible break in the investigation. And there are a lot of threads to pull together... but the focus is on the main one.
I also have part of Chapter 30 started. notes for about 5 more chapters...
Ok so I have...more or less finished the novel I was writing, the end of the trilogy (though I have ideas for the next...). So now I have time to work on Generation! Which is what I'm doing right now. I'm reviewing my notes and what I wrote before so I don't miss something important before I start writing. Get back into the scene I was in the process of writing.
Reply to Kaylee:
Thank you!!! I suppose you would describe it as...well I'm not sure either except for fanfiction. Do you call fanfic books novels?
I hope so too! ;)
I already have a lot of the next chapter done. Just need to write the rest! due to not unlimited time, I'm focusing on my original fiction right now-- and that's almost done. I've got almost 150k words-- right at the edge of climax. Hopefully by the end of the month, unless something else (like covid-- that took a lot of December) gets in the way. then i plan to work on this. some writing so I won't be totally bereft of a project, and something fun so it's a bit of a break too. and I find myself thinking about this at random times, so ... it is in the back of my mind and sometimes in front. Hopefully that'll help me jump right back into writing and write it fast. Because that's getting closer to the climax too... i envision it starting to move faster, investigation-wise... unexpected events...
then... depending on how it ends, there may be more threads to pick up. Back in Odyssey.
then perhaps another adventure... i may go back and forth like that. if writing didn't take so much mental/emotional energy, it would be easier to work on 2 projects at once... and if i had more time and didn't have to work (that's why i got so much done in 2013-- didn't have much work). Maybe it will be possible in the future... if i can get things going better, if my mind can improve (somehow)... and this health issue -- that affects sleep-- doesn't help-- makes it hard to get anywhere
whoa a new year. I really want to finish Generation this year. Then move on to the other one. I want to write a lot of all kinds of things. more than before. I hope life doesn't get in the way a lot. Just writing is hard without other things interrupting. Only so much I can write in a day because I feel what the characters feel and that can be draining. But fun at the same time. Just can't do too much at once, it all depends...
Reply to latest anon review on Generation
Well, some people don't care for romance! Personally, I love the spy stuff. Jason is what got me into it when I was 11 and first heard A Name, Not a Number, my favorite episode. And then I wrote a long spy novel from age 13-18. I'll always love it, it's why I got into writing fanfic. However, writing fanfic got me into shipping Connie and Jason. I never liked romance before. I never even thought I would write romance. I now like romance only in certain cases, like when I like certain characters together and when they actually have a relatively healthy relationship and .. idk there are certain elements. I may add more romance in this one, who knows. I would also like to put in some more AIO characters-- which is what I've been envisioning for the next one. I'm thinking they'll take a break, a little like A New Life, but without that sort of tragedy. Maybe some problems or dealing with some trauma, but I don't want to put Connie through this sort of thing again which she's been dealing with. Something else, probably-- they'll always have something they have to deal with, some difficulties... One of the babies, you say? have more than 1 baby or adopt more than one? and have complications? What kind?
you're right, everyone has different tastes. I do have this sort of tension to this one between them... romantic tension you could say. Romance though will usually be a side thing, not a main plot. Usually. You never know. I do like action though, I liked it first so it'll probably be main. But some more drama next time perhaps, in Odyssey... I have vague ideas for what may happen, which depends on what I write for the end of Generation. I never know exactly what I'll write till I write it, and I like it that way. It works better too because I let the characters decide things and act like real people.
well my covid isn't too bad so it looks like I won't die :). It's basically like a cold except I lost my sense of smell.
But still... doubts linger on this story and whether I can finish it. AIO has been tainted by a bad event on Tumblr. I can't even go back and look at that group without feeling bad. I deleted my account. I feel like I am unable to have relationships even online. Because I never had any to speak of. I do want my space but i occasionally want to talk to ppl lol. esp those that have similar likes etc but I don't know how to relate to people, so... it's too late for me at this age. formative years are over. Will always be socially inept. So what's the point of writing when I won't have any real relationships.
um... i suppose i'm still feeling bad, cooped up in my room for Christmas with covid quarantine. Mom didn't get it so I have to quarantine away from her. My room is cozy and I have things I can do like books, internet, Netflix etc... and mostly that's what I've been feeling like doing because I wasn't feeling well. But now that I'm starting to feel better, and now that it's almost Christmas, I don't like that I'll be in here till next Tuesday. I need to work on writing and trying to get jobs but I don't feel like it and feel like none of that will get anywhere as it hasn't for the last 11 years since college. Yeah. yikes. So... what is the point. and my arm hurts and keeps me up at night so idk how I can do good work when I'm tired. I need 8 hours of sleep for my mind to function sharply. No use writing etc when I know I"ll produce a less than optimum product. 4 hours of sleep and I'm a wreck, can't get a job when I still have this arm problem. Besides I don't want a regular job, I want to be an entrepreneur, freelance, but it's hard to do that when you don't have a mind... covid is ending but I'll still have this arm problem and...
eep no one wants to hear this. might as well not erase it since i went to all the trouble lol... and i feel bad about AIO in general just because of that event, the whole AIO tumblr community hates me, I know. I'll never have a group like them who accepts and loves me.
fyi i am am sick and pronably havw covid bc dad does and he lives here so if I never finish that is why
oof, been a while since I updated. I'm in the middle of a chapter... not entirely sure how to move forward. after this though... they'll be looking further into clues... I can see the climax getting closer... I'm really focusing on getting to the end of the original fiction I'm writing rn -- got a lot of it done in November and expect to be done with it soon, as the climax for that is getting really close too. Then I hope to focus on this... who knows, i might have some time before the end of the original novel too to look at it. Reviews do inspire me and I got 2 today!
thanks for Rianna, a guest reviewer. I'm glad you're enjoying reading this. And the feedback about Connie-- it's difficult to write sometimes but- her emotional fallout becomes quite intricate and I do like writing it too. I'm looking forward to the payoff... One reason why i don't want to abandon this and expect to at least EVENTUALLY finish! is that I want to reveal several surprises... certain bits of the end I've had in my head for years and I'm on my way to them...
1700 Words today!
I am working on this. Takes time to figure out what will happen. And I'm writing original fiction...
After this section things will move faster I think. More action. Things together. Hard to find such an elusive organization...
I am working on the next chapter. Notes and today notes and research
Chapter 28 up! Edited this evening. Barely had time To as p et sitting and getting ready for my sister's wedding and tired from headache. But I wanted it to get posted before I leave
Finished chapter 28 today!
i wrote 2900 words today! I was working on research for the story and notes last week and before. Took a while. and last weekend i was really tired and couldn't write. i was kind of tired today but good thing i had some time and apparently enough mind. just had to not think too much about making it perfect just writing and editing later.
Chapter 27 up!
I edited this morning. As quickly as possible. So I could post it. I hope it works. Hopefully I'll be able to write some of the next chapter today too...
Finished chapter 27 yesterday so. I will post soon after editing
I wrote some today! I didn't know if I could but. I have been distracted by many things the past week. Some of them bad. The deBacle on Tumblr and I'm still afraid of where that's going think trying not to (over) react. My sister who is getting married in August was over on the weekend. She had to get her dress fitted. I didn't see her in months bc of covid but that stupid Tumblr thing even made me space out when I was with her. :( and then this whole week I was worried about my cat and could barely get anything done. He was sick and not moving. He is better today. I was finalLy able to write after a week of no writing. I miss it. Something is alwaYs missing when I don't write.
I am not doing fanfic anymore bc what happened in my Tumblr amerakandreamer. Someone said something mean to me some of which I may deserve so I am using my time to get a job lol. As if that will happen. Next time usee me I will be in a morgue. or in HELL
My fanfic is stupid anyway and no one should care about it or me anyway so bye.
If ppl say mean things to me I do not deal w it I run. I don't get better lol. W extreme social anxiety I will never trust a therapist so I deserve everything bad. I wish I Had the courage to end My self . I really have a pathetic existence as an older millennial who doesn't even have a real job and still lives a her parents. and no one should listen to me. I deserve the worst and I hat e myseLf.
1943 words yesterday! wrote at about 9 p.m. words didn't seem hard, i didn't try to hard but thought of what the characters would think. partly i have this all in my head and maybe now... after wrote a couple chapters getting into it more. and seeing more of a way forward. and maybe i needed a break, work on other stuff, before I was ready for this. and after meeting the trafficked girls, seems more personal. leads to more in investigation... i'm not trying to live up to what I wrote before but forging a new path forward. well, with the foundation, main feeling and path, but making it my own. as i am now. idk if im making sense but i'm trying to make sense of what i feel. a sort of renaissance in my fanfic. perhaps because i have time. if i overanalyze it i may lose interest again... i hope not. i'm into the story and i'm even excited to do it. it's so fun that on tumblr there are a lot of people for Jasonnie. their excitement is contagious and gets me even more into it. multiplying my feelings. also not over censoring myself and writing what i want, not what i think i should write or what others want me to write.
in a class today, not even a writing one, the teacher was talking about mindset. and she said what do you want to be remembered for. i answered (wrote down), I have made people happy with my stories. and that actually made me cry. because that's the core of what i want to do. 2. i want people to enjoy them. 3. and i want to make a difference and help people with them. it's interesting i didn't put money down. well, i dont' care about money anyway but i need it. but maybe i shouldn't focus on making money with my stories anyway. i can't with my fanfiction of course. to focus on having fun with it and make people happy.
I wonder if I posted the chapter too soon. I was excited to post but maybe I should have edited it more? I could still... idk. I didn't get feedback either way so. idk if people are reading it. stats say some have but maybe they're not reading the whole thing? If no one reviews... I should keep going just to finish this. but I want to work on my original fiction too and it's already the middle of the year. how much can i justify working on something that has no earning potential especially if no one is reading it. Or they read it and don't care for it. well i'm writing fanfic for myself, as long as it's fun, but why should I post if no one wants to read it. Maybe it's the subject matter, i mean it's not pleasant subject but it's needed. people irl need help from this and can't help but be in it as they're trapped. its not like i'm glorifying it or anything. maybe i'm getting too 'adult' but ... mine is pretty tame comparably to some. i'm trying to be balanced... i don't try to glorify evil. in some fanfics, the 'good guys' are just as evil as the bad guys. i'm not going to go down that road, not ruin the Odyssey characters. stay true to their origins. if go away from the kid centeredness.
Chapter 26 posted! 8,000 words. That's a lot for a chapter. Oh, well. can help make up for when I didn't post. Idk... i hope it works. Some dark material in the later part of the chapter. The first part is light! Perhaps too much of a tone shift... whatever that means. things are juxtaposed sometimes. In the middle we have Gray, going off with Tasha... I went back and read all of the stuff with Gray in order to write this, get back in his mindset, even though I didn't show it directly, not in his POV. To do that-- well, I have more Impact chapters posted on AO3, mostly caught up to now. may write more...
yes a bit hard to write the latter part of the chapter. perhaps because too technical. and writing about human trafficking... want the right balance of showing what's going on without being too graphic. "too graphic" is also subjective, depending on who's reading... I mean, some people write things I would never agree with, write things about Jason I know he'd never do. I can't let anyone else's views spoil my view of Jason... I hope that's not what was wrong with the last part of the chapter. what if I couldn't write Jason anymore. what if i couldn't finish this, and could never write fanfic, and didn't listen to Odyssey anymore- when this fandom has given me so much fun and a certain level of community i never had before. Such as it is. I mean, I'm not good at interacting with people. But i joined tumblr bc AIO and Jason were on it... AIO ppl were my first followers... why i have a bunch of christians i follow on there. but ... some people's view of what one should do as a christian are different than others... it's all subjective. sort of. here i think I'm being a bit liberal writing some of these things but im conservative compared to most ppl... just liberal compared to mom lol. and she's liberal compared to... like the ppl who think all women should wear dresses. what am i rambling on about.
i do think that it's important to have role models. like the people on Odyssey. people like Jason who may be flawed but ultimately try to do the right thing-- and feel guilt when they're wrong and try to make it right. I don't want to romanticize bad relationships like almost every YA media seems to... I want to romanticize being married. people married who are in love. who do the right thing. there is almost none of this out there. that's why it feels so novel to write this ...lol... a married couple who actually love each other and want to be with each other... i want to see more of that. anyway. this is my place for writing whatever i want i guess
I wrote the rest of Chapter 26 yesterday. so now I have to edit it. I hope it works. hard to write some of it. idk. I hope I get reviews so i know if I'm doing ok or if i should keep up this story.
Last night I wrote 1300 words. So we are gradually getting somewhere in this next chapter.
I wrote 2100 words today! Connie and Jason and Tasha and Gray.
I wrote some on Monday and some today. The first part of Chapter 25. Connie's POV. I wrote several different versions. I think this story is now over halfway through. I don't want to draw this out but I also want to do it justice. difficult balance to keep. this plot has many threads and goes all over and idk how much of a story it really is. whatev. i'll try to write what's fun while also keeping things semi coherent. Well... i like the story if it makes sense. i really hope people like it.
I'm still working on Generation! I read back through and wrote down notes for 6 hours yesterday, basically all I did besides watch tv and play Scrabble :). I really want to work on it now that I have extra time during the pandemic. It may last a while and so hopefully I can have enough time to finish it.
I've gotten some nice comments lately, which help. I mean, even reblogging on Tumblr with comments in the tags helps with motivation. It shows I'm not the only one interested in this story, which can get hard to move forward with even though I want to see what happens. I have an idea of where I"m going, but not always sure how to get there, so comments help me push through and figure out what's going on. Like go back through what i already wrote and find ideas. I'm still learning as I go. I'm learning that even the smallest clue can be helpful in an investigation. Which helps to write about one! Something that seems insignificant can reveal itself to be momentous in time. And I've got to draw through the many threads in this story and make it make sense. Because I've got a lot, and it seems I just keep adding more without a resolution in sight. Some of them just dead ends but how many of those do I even want to show? I want things to be relevant. Oh, well, good thing this is fanfiction. I'm figuring it out as I go. Which has been a long time, on this one story. Novel, or whatever it is.
Anyway, today I worked on some notes too. I have the goal of getting to writing soon... I intended to yesterday but I kept finding out more things. Some relevant to the future, many of which I just forgot as it's been a long time since I read it myself. I've learned I've got to keep important info in a separate document, so I can refer to it so the story remains consistent. I hope there aren't huge inconsistencies, but it's a lot to keep track of.
For one, it's helpful to keep track of the time. It's been only a few days, a week? in story time. I'm not even sure yet... I didn't even go back to the beginning, at least, I just skimmed it because it's less relevant for the investigation.
Today I cut out what I wrote last time that was going to be part of the next chapter... I was perhaps too hasty in writing it. Something else might work better. We'll see. I had to comb through the whole story almost to find 1 detail i was looking for, and in the process discovered many other details... which may change things in the future, and may help me write this next scene. Hopefully soon; as fun as it is to dig into the substance of a story, I like to get to the writing. Because you don't have a story without it. Just a conglomeration of haphazard facts. I've got to group them up, cut out ones that aren't relevant as I go along, and get them down in story form.
I can't believe I've been writing this for over 4 years. I better finish it this year. Reviews help! :)
Chapter 25 up! I started writing the 1st part of the chapter months ago. came back to it but couldn't figure out what to write next. Then recently I finished an original novel and so I had time to go back to fanfic. I've somehow got to have enough time to work on my original stories and fanfic! neither of which get me the money i so desperately need... Maybe I'll have time to write during the stupid coronavirus. Time to work on stuff since my jobs are getting canceled. But I need money somehow... panicking. Sigh. I finished a chapter finally anyway!!!!
are the characters too ooc? did the tone change too much, whatever that is? tell me what works. i probably won't fix huge issues unless they're easily fixable though, I just want to get this story done in a reasonable shape, doesn't have to be perfect. but reviews are good, i love suggestions. especially i love when you love reading my stories! I wish i could just write all day and give people what they want. stories they love. Sigh. can't make a living on that. i'm just... preoccupied with that... can't do anything about it...
next chapter is Connie's POV and I've started writing it, probably about 1000 words in! So i've got a head start, anyway. any ideas of what should happen next? I'm thinking I should start heading toward the climax... things have been a bit too haphazard perhaps. Oh well. i'm having fun writing it. When i actually get to writing it. I do so love agent types of stories... if you can tell... i think i may at least be learning some things about writing, with my original fic and fanfic... perhaps improving ever so slightly. Perhaps getting more of an idea about Structure now, finally... I want to finish this story so i know it can be finished lol! and then start with a new one! I just hate letting people down by not posting enough... can't get over the fact it's been 4 years... a lot can happen in normal people's lives in 4 years but not mine...
Happy Valentines Day! Especially to Jasonnnie shippers lol!
Wow... I really need to get back this. over a year since updating. I will! But I've been consumed by my original fiction.
Reviews do help me remember this story and think of it! I've got it in the back of my mind. I don't want to just rush through it to the end though and think of a way to do it right...
Thank you Secret Flower! Wow, thanks for reading all my stories! I actually do write original fiction ;) but haven't had much luck with selling it yet. I do have characters near and dear to my heart though. I wish I could tell you about them though I can't talk to you since you don't have a profile here or anything. I'm so glad I'm writing stories you enjoy!
I'm def planning on finishing, just have to get through the middle, I have ideas for the ending. You are sort of on a right track but I don't want to say more. that Netherlands idea sounds like it would work well.
I wrote for the first time in a few months today! just goes to show the magic of reviews. It inspired me to take a look at my story. I was a bit stuck last time, what I wrote didn't seem right, but looking at it it seemed ok. It's fanfiction after all, doesn't have to be perfect.
Thank you anonymous Guest reviewer! It's cool you like Jason and Connie together!!!
Chapter 24 up! I intended to post it this weekend but I was busy. Hopefully it's not too un Odyssey ish. I just need to finish this.
no I need to have fun with it. No point in writing it if I'm not having fun with it. I wish I didn't have to step back from my projects in order to see them clearly. Like, it takes a year to see what's wrong with my stories and fix them. The lightbulb suddenly goes on. How did I not see it before? I can't afford to wait years before finishing projects. Why is my mind so slow/?
I wrote some of Chapter 24 on Sunday afternoon and the rest of it today. I was going to write more but I'll just start Jason's POV in next chapter.
no reviews since I started posting again... oh well. I'll keep writing... just that reviews would be nice ;)
I wrote the rest of Chapter 23 today. 2100 words, again. Now I'll have to edit it, probably be up by tomorrow.
it was a bit harrowing to write because I have to see things from the trafficked girls' POV for a bit even though it's not the POV I'm writing in, so I get their authentic voice and reactions. Being empathetic takes a lot out of you, especially if it's feeling what a girl who was once enslaved feels. Such darkness and horror to be immersed in, to be unable to escape... what I feel is nothing in comparison to what real girls feel, it's just an echo, in order to write it, to try to do justice to the girls in my story, and to real-life trafficked people.
I'll have to put a warning on it, I think. Not graphic, but the subject's disturbing. BUt real life people go through such horrible things daily. I can't even properly imagine.
I wrote more of Chapter 23 today. 2100 words. So it should be done soon.
they go to meet girls who were trafficked.
Chapter 22 up!
I want to make the investigation realistic and not find immediate clues but I want the story to move along. That's the challenge in the early stages of the investigation--one reason I was having trouble with it. I do want to accelerate it a bit but not TOO much so there's some suspense. Which leads up to a big payoff, a tense climax.
I wrote most of the rest of the chapter today, and part of the next one! So there will be another chapter posted soon, after editing. The first whole chapter I wrote in a long time... It was fun to write! A new character just appeared, bringing her own backstory.
Well I've written some of next chapter of Generation today so hopefully it means I'll get it going and done (but not rushed...). I looked at the word count and it's officially the longest fanfic I've ever written. 67,000 words! More than Quest for Nobility, which was 63,000 words. I can see this running to 100,000 words... so no wonder this story is taking me a while (but longer than it would've...oh well. I'll finish it at some point if it takes me the rest of my life lol). It probably should've had a bit more of a focus... but perhaps I'll do better going forward, if I write other fanfic. Write different, a change of pace... but I think I'll always write some version of Jasonnie. :)
Hopefully the ending will be worth it all. I have plans... for a recurring villain perhaps... [tmi?]
Ok wow. It took me over a year to end the chapter. But I did end it! Sometimes you have to take a break to get perspective on a project. New ideas can arise when you've been away a while. I don't want to neglect fanfiction so much again...as I do love it... although I have even more going on now. I need to write original fiction also.
I got frustrated with my story I was writing, and so I didn't have a writing project, but I'm not myself without writing. A recent review of Fallout inspired me to keep going... although there's no new reviews of Generation. Perhaps it's getting a bit too little Odyssian... I do at least want to finish this story. I think I have an idea of how to go ahead now. And not to take it too seriously. Because it's fanfiction! Who cares if I get reviews. Or if it's great literature. It's for fun. I tend to write better, at least be capable of writing more, when I'm doing it for fun... how to manufacture that without taking things too seriously... Ah, like when you look directly at a distant start, and it becomes dimmer... got to find a way to look at things sideways, and thus tackle them head-on--paradoxically ;)
I hope the characters aren't getting too OOC. After such time apart. But I'll soon get back into the swing of things, if I keep writing.
Wrote 2100 words today! Almost finished with this chapter. When I figure out a good ending for it.
Ok so I wrote some of Generation the other day after a couple months. I almost forgot some things. I need to at least look at it occasionally to keep it fresh in my mind. But once I started, it was easy to get back into it. Helped that I stopped at a point that I sort of knew what was going to happen next.
I got some nice reviews on Tumblr and so it encouraged me to get back into writing it. :) Thank you lovely anons! And people that pmd me.
Maybe I won't write anymore because some people on Tumblr said my fanfic wasn't good.
Or maybe I should just rush through this to get it finished and that will be it.
These really aren't very good. Who am I kidding. I really messed up with this one. Lots of people could do AIO fanfic better than me.
Chapter 20 posted!
Should Gray go back to the dark side or choose good?
I wrote 1800 words this morning! I finished Chapter 20 and I'll probably have it up by tomorrow.
Got some writing done this morning. Mostly research. I needed to know some more things about Vietnam to figure out just what happened to Ai.
Tien Thi Ai, her sister Tien Thi Yen who was the witness at the wedding
Thank you for your review GJFH! :)
it occurred to me...I could end this dark --though now that I think of it, that's not what I want. I don't like bad endings. It would of course eventually end good...with the next story. (but I don't know if I want to have a long story again, want to go back to Odyssey but we'll see)
It could end with Connie's nightmare about Jason at the end of A New Life. Or I could make an AU about it. I thought of this because of a certain thing that might happen at the end of Generation. Something I'm not sure how to get Jason out of! (again)
Chapter 19 of Generation up! wasn't sure I'd do it today because I was so tired. It isn't as long as the last chapter but it's long. The last chapter was too long. Is 4000 words ok or too long?
Should I post the extra chapter? It's romance between Connie and Jason and I know a lot of you don't care for that :) Some do... but of those who are reading this?
I wrote the rest of Chapter 19 today. It's over 4000 words! Is that too long? Should it cut it into chapters? I already have an extra chapter of 2000 words. To make up for all the time I haven't updated. :)
Maybe I'll just post it. I'll try to make other chapters shorter--unless you'd rather have longer chapters. This is all Connie's POV so it goes together. And it'll be edited down some too. I'll probably post it tomorrow.
--Also, to Olivia Nameless:
Sorry I didn't reply to your review. Not used to getting reviews anymore. But I fully intend to finish this story! At least this one. Future ones...who knows. I'll finish them if I start them though unless they're horrible. Thank you for reading!
I do have ideas for a story after this... more Odyssey-centric. It does have to do with what happens at the end of this one though--something I can't wait to write about and share.
Others who've shared their ideas:
I have seen your ideas and I may incorporate them into this or another story. :)
I wrote 1400 words this morning. Hopefully tomorrow or the day after I can finish the chapter and post it by the weekend. We'll see--as long as I'm able to write and don't get a headache or something.
I wrote a bunch of romance part of which will probably get cut out in order to focus on moving the story forward.
There is a new villain in town. Well... someone from the past but not a main one although now they have progressed to a leadership role, embracing evil.
WOW A NEW CHAPTER!
I maybe rushed through the editing bc I wanted to get it posted today. Because I had the chapter done and didn't want it to just sit here if people wanted to read it. I didn't have any time all week. And weekends always get so busy/recovering from the week!
Tell me if there's anything wrong and I'll see what I can do to change it. Or if you have any ideas for what can happen next! I have some but other ideas might be good too!
I wrote 2400 words yesterday and 2300 words today. After I edit, it'll still be a long chapter! Unless I edit a lot. Or unless I chop it into two. I just think it works better as one chapter because of where it ends. Not a good ending I don't think in the rest of it...maybe. We'll see. Now I have to go back and edit it. I hope it's ok.
Do you want one big chapter or 2 smaller chapters?
maybe you deserve a big one or at least 2 in quick succession if you've waited this long and you're still following this story.
I wrote this from Connie's POV.
I lost him two months ago. The pain numbs. I can forget, sometimes. I can be happy when I forget. But then it crashes back into me, the empty hollow ache—along with the guilt—for forgetting. For not feeling the pain. How dare I let myself feel good, laugh—I should cry, I should forever mourn him—he was worth it. He was so small, but he was a whole world. He was my little boy. I loved him with all my heart
Still love him. How can I go on without him? Go to these parties as if he doesn’t matter. How could I ever think of replacing him. Jeremiah, my baby boy. Even if I could even risk another—as if he were just some object.
My soul aches. Lying here in the darkness, it hurts—so much—without Jason beside me. Not even he could comfort me fully. Nothing can replace what I lost.
I don’t want to move on—because it means forgetting him. Leaving him behind like he doesn’t matter. Just because I never saw him didn’t mean I didn’t feel his presence, his little life inside me. I longed to hold him, imagined what he’d look like—he had Jason’s eyes.
Me and Jason started thinking of colors for his room. Just talking about it. We’d work together, give him cute little toys and—
Oh, Jeremiah, my little son, my boy
Why! Why did you leave me.
What else is there, after this? How do you move on, after losing a child? I’ve lost a part of myself, and I’ll never get it back. He tore a piece of me away when he died.
Part of me will always be there, lying in the hospital when they told me there was nothing they could do.
You were gone. Like a wisp of smoke. And I never got to hold you, kiss your little face
Oh, God! Why? Why take him—
I know he’s in heaven. A much better place. I’ll meet him someday. But the gulf is so wide. Time. So long before I can look into his eyes.
Will he be a baby when I meet him? Or a little boy, bright and mischievous like a little Jason?
I cannot stand this. It is easier to forget, to “move on”—push all this back. Even if it means betraying him.
But…maybe it isn’t betraying him to move on. To not wallow in sorrow, to forget my Jason like I did. Would he want me to waste away? It honors his memory to not stay at a standstill. To seize life. To love—like I love him—to love Jason, be there for him in his own pain. To have a full life, for his sake. Live as if he were here. Be happy, like I would have if he were here, and in that way, he’s still with me.
Will always be with me.
And maybe, someday, I will welcome—not a replacement—but another life. Not him, but a little brother or sister I can introduce to him when we meet someday in heaven….
Well, I've been writing this story for over a year. Already. And I haven't updated in a while! Sorry about that. I am working on it...though I usually only work on it on weekends and my weekends have been busy. So that's what's going on.
Today I did write more of Chapter 18. I was stuck for a bit as I didn't know which way a character was going. So I will finish Chapter 18, eventually.
I wrote some of Chapter 18 today! I had written some but I had to erase it because it was no good. One shouldn't just write filler scenes; they should take the story somewhere.
I'm also thinking a lot of it going forward will be Jason's POV. I mean, the one I'm writing is; it just seemed like it should be. This way, it will have a stronger focus. Now that we're shifting gears a little to more action-y things. But there will be some of Connie's POV still too.
I've been reading some of my old sketches from my fanfic documents (and posting them on tumblr!). Reminding me that fanfic is for fun. So I should just have fun with it. Write sketches. Go crazy if I want. Be creative. Even regular fiction can benefit from this, so it doesn't get too serious. What's creativity if you're not having fun? not that I've not been having fun as I --at least try-- to write this on the weekends.
but I need that inner drive that makes me not be able to stop.
Chapter 17 posted!
It makes me so sad when people don't want Connie and Jason together. But I have to get used to disagreement. (and how does it even matter in the long run?) And maybe I'm not right and I've wasted thousands of words and hundreds of hours writing and shipping these two imaginary characters from a kids radio show! I mean, is that really a good use of my time?
I need to have fun sometimes. I just...if people disagree with me, it always makes me second-guess myself.
someone disagreed with me about Jason and Connie on The Soda Shoppe and I'm like shaky right now. What's wrong with me?
over 3000 words today! I had to fix the 1st part of the chapter and stay in Jason's POV. Didn't make sense to chop it up in the middle. Sometimes writing decisions don't make sense and you have to fix them. So then switched naturally to Connie's POV in this next chapter. About to start the celebration and then--I'm thinking it'll start getting into more action-y stuff...investigation yet, not getting into too much danger, but still. The main thing they'll be doing for the rest of the story. Fun to write this chapter. I will need to edit though and probably post it tomorrow. It'll be long. I also have part of the next chapter written.
- I have a profile on Tumblr called jasonandconniewhittaker. I don't have too much on it yet but I think I'll write some of what Connie's thinking on it and maybe Jason and also reblog Odyssey things.
- The Gray situation...based kind of on my experiences as I have someone in my life who is hard to forgive, namely the man who abused my sister. It's kind of a way of working this out because I haven't seen him in a long time and don't want to--he's dangerous...forgiveness is hard.
well part of what I wrote last week is no good. It was Connie's POV but it didn't seem right so I have to erase it and start over.
I wrote 2 sentences yesterday. I was so tired. I could not think to write. Daylight savings time. I actually was starting to sleep through a movie which never happens.
Today I wrote like 1000 words. Even with my niece popping in and out of my room.
Switched to Connie's POV after the 1st part. Hopefully it works. I think I need to not take so much time between chapters because it takes me a while to get back into the story. Into the characters' POVs. So I at least need to take some time every week to work on it. It will be easier to write then. It's just that I need to write my original fiction too (amid all my other things). Need to find a time balance. THis is important since it hasn't dropped off completely. I have so many things I need to do which I haven't even started...
but I daren't get myself into a panic about it.
I do love writing this. I don't want to take so much time away from it--don't want to abandon Jason and Connie that's for sure!
got some more to do with the chapter before I post it though. I may post longer chapters. Like 3000 words, even 4000. We'll see.
I need to get back to this! Working on it this weekend, prep, not writing yet.
Here is a sketch to get into Gray's mindset for last and this chapter.
Well it won't paste on my iPad for some reason. I'll try to tomorrow.
in case anyone is interested.
Scraps, notes, sketches, actual sketches that are terrible and some not so awful--more goes into writing than what you see. Also research.
Like researching pregnancy...
I was walking in the jungle of Paraguay. Ramon was there, paternal and larger-than-life like always. He laid his hand on my shoulder, showing me his plantations. Slaves worked there, backs breaking under heavy loads, sweating under the sun.
“See this?” said Ramon. “All this could be yours. As long as you whip the slaves.”
A woman stood there, lashing a whip into a man’s back, shredding it. She had auburn hair that glinted copper under the sun, her eyes fierce with bloodlust.
I froze, unable to move.
She handed the whip to me.
The slave turned—it was Jason, looking as he had when I’d whipped him in the shed, his eyes glazed with suffering.
“Now whip him,” said Ramon.
I couldn’t move. Somehow I knew that if I whipped him, I’d hurt myself too.
The whip appeared in Ramon’s hand. The sky went dark.
The whip slashed into my back, shredding my clothes, leaving me nearly naked. Vivian’s harsh laugh echoed across the field. The next blow slammed me into the dirt, tearing into me, blood pouring over my split skin.
I jerked awake, gasping for breath. Panic seized my mind—I was in a small, enclosed space, the cell—
But no. It was a large, rich room with luxurious furnishings, a mahogany desk, antique chairs.
I lay back against the pillows, focusing on calming my churning breaths, my heart thumping against my chest.
Beyond the scarlet curtains showed a patch of rain-soaked landscape, a broad field, hints of garden and forest beyond the rolling hills.
Relief washed over me. this might seem dreamlike, but it was real. Reality, somehow, was no longer agony and humiliation.
I jumped out of bed, grabbed my clothes I’d laid out the night before on the green chair by the window. Fear hit me; it didn’t matter how irrational it was, lately I always felt as if someone might burst in and see me indisposed. They’d see my scars, the broken body I was once proud of.
Quickly, despite the aches in my muscles, I pulled the gray long-sleeved shirt over my head, the pants over the most shameful parts of me. In the bathroom, I glanced in the mirror at the haggard face I barely knew, dark circles under his eyes, his once tanned skin pale, the cheekbones jutting painfully, the eyes hollow and haunted.
You’re the one who let yourself be raped, I told myself like I had a hundred times before. Pain sliced through my arm. I realized my fingernails were digging into the half-healed, self-inflicted wound. Ruining my shirt.
Idiot! Now I’d have to toss out another shirt. Pretty soon I’d have no shirts, and I wouldn’t allow myself the indulgence of buying more, and everyone would laugh at my scars and lust after my body for a few moments of ripping pleasure before discarding it—the man inside it not worth any consideration, any kindness or love.
The dream flashed across my mind. Panic built in my chest. I couldn’t be in here anymore. Someone would come in, trap me—hurt me—
I ran for the door—yanked it open, revealing a hallway with golden wallpaper. Not a man or woman in sight.
Stop being paranoid. Pull yourself together. If you can’t, you don’t deserve this mission.
-Oh well now it pasted.
Chapter 16 up! I had to fix some things, take some out...Wondered if I should edit more, on the fence about some things (if they were similar to what was before--) but seemed to go in this part of the story.
I have also been doing chapters (after the 1st chapter) that end with "-ion" or "ance/ence" because it started out that way by accident and now I try to find a word that ends with those things for each chapter. But it's getting harder to do... I may rename the chapters later if I find a better word.
I could've kept editing but I wanted to get this story posted before I have to get to other things... I may fix more later. I also want to get to writing the next chapter. :)
I just finished Chapter 16, started Chapter 17. I should have Chapter 16 up by tomorrow.
Wrote part of Chapter 16 today. They're at the Muldavian palace, in complete luxury.
Chapter 15 up!
finally. I had to edit and rewrite a little, add in a little and take out some. Hopefully it's ok.
Thank you to those of you who have stuck with this story from the beginning.
Well, I didn't think I would, but I finished Chapter 15 today! I was going to fix a little and write something else but I started and couldn't stop. The second half (?) of the story is taking shape. I should be able to move forward from this--after this chapter, I can see where it will go, this chapter built a kind of foundation, or pulled some things together and left some things behind, or dormant, until later so I have the basic form of the adventure going forward. I had ideas for the previous part but not for this part so much but now it looks like I will be able to write this more--when I have spare time that is.
This is the thing I want to write about. (spies and people who fight injustice in the world). Because it's really what I want to do (but probably can only write about, at least the first thing...the second thing, probably can't do as much as most people, not as much as Connie, who can do more than she thinks.)
I wrote part of Chapter 15 today. Probably halfway done. Fun to write if not totally for the characters. Nothing compared to what will be... Muldavia will be wonderful but also dangers. Which they will try to avoid.
I want people to know that although it probably won't happen much with this story, I do plan to add (focus on...) more AIO characters! It's actually in my plan for future stories... I don't have a lot as I'm focusing on this one but I have a general idea. Future events will partly be affected by what happens soon--in profound ways. But in other ways things will go back to normal...just with some additions.
and going forward Jason and Connie will have a new central goal(s) which others will join them in
I daren't say too much especially since I don't know too much myself. ;)
I wonder if people are still reading these stories...not too many lately. Perhaps I'm not doing something right.
oh, well. I intend to keep writing. At least this story, anyway and maybe the 1st chapter of a new one and if that has no interest I might not write anymore unless I feel like it as I don't have much time to spare for it
what am I saying I hope I'll always write fanfiction...but you never know with real life.
I'll remain faithful to JC even if it turns into a total AU (the show takes another turn :( )
Happy New Year!
Chapter 14 posted. Finally. I will try to write more consistently. As momentum is picking up, threads coming together...
I wrote a bunch of Chapter 14 today. It should be finished soon, maybe by New Years!
Wrote part of Chapter 14. Because of my notes and foundation I've had, it pretty much wrote itself. I didn't expect to write so much today before even looking back on previous chapters for specifics.
We'll be heading from DC to the setting for most of the rest of the story, probably. And ze team assembles haha.
the dynamic between the 4, with their past, should make things interesting. Plus the people Jason's been involved with before. And the organization. And...what we'll find out about Jerry's family. And --who is at the center of all of this. Be some time before we find THAT out... lots of different threads coming together to create a Shocking Conclusion. :)
Chapter 13 up! Sorry I didn't post yesterday, I had a headache.
This is quite different in that it's Jerry's POV for the most part, his letter. I researched some about Vietnam but there may be inaccuracies because I just have to write this...and I'll never know totally, only those who were there can know what it was like.
-Jasonnie Shipper: What a great name! :) Thank you! That's the best compliment. :) I too love Jason, if you couldn't tell, and he was also my first crush.
Your wish is my command!
Hopefully I'll write faster now, getting to the more action-y part.
Plus I've got to just find time to write this even if it occasionally cuts into my other writing time.
I wrote most of the next chapter today. It was fun, totally getting into Jerry's POV. I'll probably write the rest and post it tomorrow.
I was just drawing a picture of Ai and I Dreamed a Dream came on my Pandora. It was probably kind of what she might feel after Jerry died...
Sad writing this when I know what happened.
Wow it's been a while since I posted. I have hardly been working on this lately...procrastinating, because pieces of it seem to be difficult. Maybe this one's too ambitious for me--or I'm coming to the end of my fanfiction phase? I hope not.
I mean, I had a dream with Jason in it the other night. Maybe that's what got me back to working on this. I at least must finish this story no matter what.
Maybe I have to not take it so seriously. It's fanfiction after all. Supposed to have fun with it. The other writing can be my "serious" writing. Though I don't want to take that too seriously either and take the fun out of it...
I'll see if I can work on this on the weekends anyway or during breaks between my other writing and that way I won't fall behind on this and actually get some writing out.
I did some research today--it is nice to know a little about what you're talking about. But it can also swallow up writing time.
I want at least the appearance of authenticity so it doesn't take you out of the story. I mean, how many readers have been to Vietnam or been to war? I don't have to be totally accurate, I'll never know what it's really like either. I just have to guess.
I took some of what I'd written before from Jerry's letter and stuck it in my main document, integrated it, edited it. I'll try to get some more of it done today. I really want to do him justice and get his state of mind right and follow through on his emotional journey.
Posted Chapter 12. I'm sorry I didn't post it earlier; I was busy last week.
I hope it's ok. I had to come up with Ben's backstory. Feels like something may be missing...Not sure what but it's true that I'm never totally satisfied with the chapters.
It is a long one. It also lays the foundation for what will happen next. What the main plot of the story will be. Some investigation and then adventure...
In many ways, I'm along for the ride too, but as it's an adventure story, things will get more and more intense. One thing I know--the characters' lives will never be the same again. It will launch into a whole new adventure for them. (But of course things can change...who knows what will happen!)
Well I finished Chapter 13! I still need to fix it though so I probably won't post it till tomorrow.
It's a long chapter--over 4,000 words. I'll probably cut it down some though. It's basically the basis for the rest of the story. I figured out some things in it...missing pieces. They meet with the father of the boy who was kidnapped.
There will be another "transition" chapter and then they'll ...well, you'll see.
They'll investigate, things'll escalate...who knows what'll happen. Even I don't know too much yet. But enough to move forward (it seems) fortunately.
Tell me if you have any suggestions/comments/questions/concerns etc!! :)
Sorry it's taking so long. I've been busy. I've had to write this in bits and pieces. Also I have not been totally sure how to proceed. I've got to set the foundation for what's to come. But my ideas about what happens next are taking shape. There are just a lot of pieces to put together. Perhaps I have been a bit too ambitious with this one, trying to do lots of things at once, bring several threads together. I hope it's working. Despite the fact that this is diverging from the show (obviously), I hope the characters don't get too OOC. The main thing is staying true to the main characters.
I do want to put more AIO characters in it. The thing is, this is another "traveling" story and it's hard to do that realistically. Also the more people the more I have to work with and have to figure out how to weave everything together.
I wrote part of the next chapter but I haven't re-read it so I have some misgivings about whether it really works. I want to end it well...I need to have some suspense or people will stop reading. Perhaps I've come to the end of my ability to write fanfic...I hope not...Perhaps I'm just being overly ambitious and trying to top what's gone before and now I'm messing it up. Or have to be very careful so it doesn't fall apart.
Being a bit overdramatic perhaps. We'll see. Perhaps the elements I'm dealing with are more unfamiliar than usual. I do have a lot more of an idea of how this will move forward than I started; it's probably just taking slowly.
I hope it doesn't go too slowly; I don't want to be writing this for years. I certainly don't want to abandon this! Even if it's the last fanfic I do, even if I do work on it for years, I don't intend to abandon it. I hate it when people do that. The wonderful fanfic I'm reading now took 10 years to write--I'd rather wait 10 years than not at all, and if it takes that long to make a good story, then I'll be okay with it.
This morning I did get a chance to read some of a book about Vietnam. My knowledge about it before was superficial at best, I realize. When you hear from the people who were in it, it comes alive...there were real people who had to deal with it, it's not just history.
I'm not sure how much of Vietnam will be in this story. But I want to get the backstory right even if I don't mention it much. For instance, from reading, I realized something I hadn't before that would have not been credible if I'd written it.
I may write a side story from Jerry's POV, or write it to get some backstory into Generation. That's what I mean by having to deal with a lot of different parts. It's just fanfiction, but I at least want it to be good enough that people will enjoy reading it and not be taken out of it by something annoying or unrealistic.
It's true that I've dealt with this topic before, I have just implied it. For instance, Sierra was enslaved as a child. And abused many times. And it's implied what would happen to the slaves in Collision...perhaps physical labor, but it also could've been worse.
I ended up writing more of Impact in order to know where Gray's coming from as he'll probably appear later in the story. I actually wrote first person this time. And it's dark. Because of what happened to him. It's a bit hard to dwell on...but good to have his mindset going forward.
I have an emotional through line now. So obvious I should've seen it earlier, but with the transition, was a bit rough. Still figuring this out. Perhaps I need to study more about human trafficking so I have material to work with...writing Chapter 12. More about the boy-- Ben. They learn about it from his father.
I'm at least thinking about this story, even when I'm not writing it. For instance, today during work I listened to Boat People on OAC and I took some notes because it actually had to do with Jerry and Vietnam! Didn't contradict what I have and added some material I can use. At some point I'd like to at least write something from Jerry's POV to get some background more clear. The more you know about your story's world, the better you can write it.
Hopefully I can get some writing done this weekend.
After re-reading the last chapter, I wonder if it's right to write what I did. I only got 1 review and it wasn't positive toward the subject matter.
It isn't an easy subject, I know. Is it too much? Should it be rated M--or at least the chapter be rated M? It's not graphic though and I think T is ok for just mentioning it--
tell me if I'm wrong or if I should change the rating or make more of a warning.
I won't mention it much in future chapters, perhaps just implied. I'm not even sure what will happen in future chapters--just nebulous ideas, some clearer than others, the closer the clearer.
I have had some pretty extreme things happen in my stories...they're not for the core AIO audience that's for sure. Starting with Fallout. Kids probably shouldn't be reading this. Why they're rated T.
I don't think the mention of ...what happened to Gray warrants an M rating. Any description would be, like Impact.
I don't even like to mention it. I just thought it should be clear what happened to him, Jason should know this, for what will/may happen in the future.
The characters choose their paths as much as I choose them, and Gray will have to choose his.
With his pride shattered, he has a chance to choose what's right. Is he able to? It won't be easy--with his background--and getting hurt doesn't necessarily push you toward the light, it can just as easily pull you into darkness.
Thanks for the review! I know...I wasn't sure about it myself. But it did happen and it seemed like it fit with this story and what's going on with the characters. Gray's arc. I couldn't just leave him where he was. He was a bad guy but deeply wounded...there is always a chance for redemption. I don't know whether he'll take it or not...
I'm not going to be graphic in the future chapters. I won't even mention this much probably. This is just to know where Gray's coming from. And...the subject matter of this story is not always going to be pleasant. Because of what does happen to the trafficked children.
But I get where you're coming from. You're reading for your own enjoyment and it's totally up to you whether you read it or not! You're an awesome person and awesome reviewer. ;)
About this story/subject: Trafficked children.
it's not just forcing them to work in manual labor--that would be bad enough. And the physical abuse. But there is even worse kind of abuse.
we can't turn a blind eye to it just because it's unpleasant because they need help. They're the ones trapped in it. They don't have the option of pretending it doesn't exist like those who are not in slavery. Because it's such a horrible subject we want to not think about it. Sweep it under the rug (like abortion...). It's invisible and doesn't have to affect us. But children are trapped in terrible slavery. We've got to get the word out even if it's not a pleasant subject to think about.
So I won't be graphic and there won't be a lot dwelt on but I'm not going to pretend it doesn't exist either. Some chapters will deal more with it, some less--some with other subjects (Vietnam etc)--and I'll give warnings for it.
Mostly I expect it'll be investigation/adventure. Just mention of some things are unavoidable if they're to help the kids.
Chapter 11 up! Started Chapter 12 too.
I have a warning on Chapter 11; not sure if I needed it but better to err on the side of caution. It really just mentions it...I wouldn't want to write anything graphic (even Impact, which deals more with it and is rated M, is not very graphic). Tasha talks a little about what happened to her but doesn't go into detail. It did happen though and it seemed that Jason should know about it. Because of what may happen in the future...
things coming together. :)
But this chapter was sad...I cried at the first part while writing. And of course what happened to Gray...
of course, later on we'll have to deal with more sensitive issues because of human trafficking...but still remaining respectful and non-graphic. While having to discuss on some level to do justice to them and raise awareness...need to strike a balance.
Aha! I know his motivation and it's right in front of my face. He doesn't want to leave Connie, especially with all that's happened, with how she "left" him emotionally. He wants to be as close to her as he can, his love concentrated and intensified after her absence.
Wrote 2nd part of Chapter 11. I get these ideas that only come while I'm writing--and looking back at notes. Always look back at old notes, especially if you want dimension to your stories. Especially now, with all the layers it has, building on the stories before.
Tasha is in it and she has disturbing news.
after fixing the chapter I'll probably post it tomorrow.
I wonder if people still care about this story...it's hard to bear with me sometimes, I know. I've gone on longer hiatuses than this. And what I write about might not please some. That last chapter was kind of...well, I was still discovering what this next part of the story would be. But after some stumbling I've got a through line. Connect 1st part to second part--how Connie's absence affected them. Is still. Everything converging--I'm pulling in a lot of threads here...
Working on Chapter 11. I was a little vague on Jason's motivations; I didn't want him to get all OOC. Perhaps he is...hope not too much.
what I wrote seemed to be better but then I re-read it...perhaps it doesn't work as well as I thought. Hm. Don't want to rewrite chapter. I cried during the chapter but doesn't mean what I wrote will affect anyone again including me...:(
Chapter 10 up! A new character just popped into being. I'm not sure how much of a role he'll have but I think he'll reappear...they'll need to contact him for more info...or will they hehe you'll just have to keep reading
there is lots of talking in this chapter, hope it doesn't get too boring.
Well I have written Chapter 10! I'm not sure how well it turned out but the first draft is over 4000 words, a long chapter to make up for a long absence. Well, not really. It has been a long time since I posted a chapter.
For one thing, I just had to start writing and more ideas appeared. It also helped to look in my notes. Perhaps I couldn't have written the chapter till now. Many pieces had to come together. Perhaps that was part of the problem. There are so many elements to the story and I had to bring them together. There has to be a central focus. I think what helped after I started the chapter was realizing who the main villain would be. There has to be a villain or there's no story. The villain provides conflict for the mc and the mc has to react to what he/she does before finally (hopefully) prevailing. And Gray isn't really a bad guy anymore (well not the antagonist anyway) and so I had to find someone else. Someone new. Or IS it someone new? ;)
I'll probably post the chapter tomorrow after I fix it unless it's unfixable. But I have to post something! Hopefully my writing hasn't suffered from the gap between the last chapter and this. (not that I haven't been writing other things, just that the tone etc may have shifted, but it kinda does need to shift a little bit because we're transitioning into new territory)
I suppose it has been a while since I updated anything! It's true that it did take me a year to write the relatively short A New Life...I'm just not being as prolific as I once was, I suppose. No guarantee I won't be in the future, though. I was writing quite a bit for a while there. People will get spoiled if I keep doing that. ;)
Thanks for the message. It could be writer's block, though I hate to call it that. It's just that I've been having a hard time visualizing what happens next. I usually see what happens in my head first and then write it down. There are so many ways it could go; though I have the general idea, I need to think of a few more specifics perhaps.
I recently thought that what I usually do is not think of the big picture, but just what happens next, take that step, and then see what happens from there. I just don't want to take a wrong step...
But don't worry! I haven't forgotten about this story. I'm working on some other projects, and I was on vacation for 10 days in May, but I actually wrote some notes today (some while listening to Odysseys with Jason in it), and during vacation I read a book on Vietnam. Part of my problem is that I want to write at least part of what happened in the past with Jerry and to do that I have to understand the war a bit. Though I'll never fully understand it, since I wasn't there...
Sometimes it's true you have to look at things from a different perspective. I was thinking about something that I wrote in one of the chapters, that I could write about Jason's past, a mission he had, short perhaps unless it ended up being longer...sometimes it's good to just have fun with something and not think about what will happen next at all.
But no, the series is not over. I don't want to abandon something I started, even if it takes 10 years (I recently read a wonderful fic of over 300,000 words that took 10 years to write! It was worth it--but the story still wasn't over!). Hopefully it won't take that long. I'm just being slow about stepping into the next part, but every time I think about it or make some notes I get closer.
Perhaps I am worried that this story won't live up to expectations or to previous stories. I want to make it better! As good as I can do it, not just throw random stuff out there. But it's true I need to start writing sometime. Sometimes you have to just start writing.
It is an interesting idea to start another story...I may do a side one that has to do with this one or something completely different... (though sadly I can't make this story my writing priority, at least not the majority of the time).
part of the problem is that I know Odyssey and the characters but when it comes to the world beyond that I have to do research. And I could never do enough research to do a subject justice. I'd have to actually be in it to know what it was really like. Like Vietnam, or spy, etc. Otherwise it's just guesswork. It is only fanfiction, doesn't have to be perfect. But I'd like it to have a certain measure of authenticity...
Well I have the first couple paragraphs of the next chapter. I'm not totally certain what to write next though. I have vague ideas. I really don't outline much anyway and I usually work pretty spontaneously. But this time I guess I'm really not sure of the direction it's going now that I'm doing it. Once I wrote the last chapter, I thought, is that really realistic? For Jerry to know a girl in Vietnam a short time then get married to her? I had this idea for a long time...and it did happen in real life in some cases...but I don't know. Something feels weird. Even to the point of not being sure if I want to write this or other fanfiction anymore. I had that momentum with the first part of it now I'm not sure if it's the right direction or if it'll work...I suppose I could just start writing and see if it'll turn out. Which I usually do. But I usually have a vision for it, a focus, if not much details--and I believe in where it's going. Now I'm not so sure. And the human trafficking element? How can I realistically weave that and the other thing? And Jason and Connie's relationship-- and everything else--is it getting so far away from the original material--is it even Odyssey anymore? What am I thinking?
God was rather more central to the first few stories because of their themes. Now I'm not totally sure what happened in the last one but they probably should have prayed more after the miscarriage...maybe that was part of the problem.
They HAVE prayed in Generation though, in the first chapter, and Jason mentioned praying in this chapter. The theme I have in mind has to do with what God's will is so it should be more evident as the story goes on.
Even if God seems to be in the background, that doesn't mean He isn't there. Jason being so selfless when Connie was in pain WAS kind of a picture of what God's love is like. His is unconditional. He will love us at the expense of his own comfort. And now Connie realizes that and she wants to give Jason that same kind of love back.
But yes, I was kind of noticing this myself...as AIO is Christian I don't want to pull away from that foundation, for it wouldn't really be Odyssey then. Although some episodes, God isn't explicitly mentioned, either...but He is there in the character's actions, how they live their lives as Christians, and the themes revealed. Thank you for pointing this out.
Chapter 9 up! I didn't get around to posting it yesterday because I had a lot to do. I had to cut out some things and fix some things because it wasn't quite right. May not still be but I'll need to take some distance to know, perhaps, what I need to fix and I wanted to get it posted. You can tell me if there are things that don't work too or mistakes. It's been a while. I have to adjust what the characters are thinking and feeling from the past to the present/future, trying to blend it seamlessly. I hope the subject works. I've got this idea but feeling out how it'll go forward after this foundation. I've got events, pictures in my head, but not totally sure how they will work together, especially since there are several things going on at once. Hopefully not too ambitious. I have a habit of going "epic", perhaps too much so. Too many threads so I can't handle it. We'll see... always try to do bigger and better, finale or beginning of next series...
I'm done with Chapter 9. Probably up tomorrow after I fix it.
It was a little hard to write because it's a transition from the first part to the next... the main adventure begins...more than just hints. But we had to have the foundation that propels it forward. Plus I had a lot of the first part in my mind and in notes but not as much the second part, so I had to build that up. Still working on it...need to do some research etc. I'm trying to bring in a lot of threads to make it epic but I hope I'm not trying to do too much at once...it has to have a central focus or it'll fall apart.
But I do have an idea of where the whole thing is going. More surprises along the way...I've got the main themes etc...
it's the middle that's kind of amorphous right now.
Chapter 8 up! Jason's POV. We find out what Whit was up to.
Wrote the rest of Chapter 8 and some of Chapter 9 today. I'll fix it and it should be up tomorrow.
For Chapter 9, I researched some names and their heartbreaking meanings in context of the story.
I wrote some more of Chapter 8 today. Jason's POV. It should be finished soon and then I'll post it.
Chapter 7 up! Fiddled with this for a while. I didn't want to be graphic but I wanted to deal with some issues that needed to be resolved. They are married after all.
Naomi: I wasn't able to get the blog address because fanfiction. net doesn't like URLs for spam reasons. Sometimes if you space out the parts of the address more like a word, but you can still understand it as an address, it works. Would you be able to get a regular account? That way it would be easier to communicate through PMs. Or another account somewhere that you have?
Anyway, yes that would be cool! I LOVE seeing Jason/Connie art especially interpretations of my stories. It would be great if there was some way to include a picture in each chapter, instead of just on the "cover". I think Ao3 can actually have pictures in the chapters. I could put a version of this story over there...
Things will get more exciting soon! (though I'm still working out the details.) I do know what Whit's up to...but I'm not exactly sure how soon we'll know, probably pretty soon, at least part of it...
Awesomegirl: Hehe Well I'm actually still figuring out Tasha's role in all this. I like Tasha ok, just not with Jason, if you haven't figured that out. ;) And yes, Connie and Jason are sort of in a honeymoon stage, partly because they were still in it when it was interrupted by the tragic events. Now it's like they're getting to know each other over again, and falling back in love...(they never were really out of it, it's just that they're coming back to where they should have been)
I was laughing at that part as well. That part wasn't planned; it came to me spontaneously while writing.
Update is coming soon...I did write most of a chapter today but I've got to go through it, weed things out, make other words stronger, make sure it makes sense, and edit for content.
Chapter 6 up! Wow that's a lot of chapters already. I don't want to rush it too much and not do it right...
I'm actually trying (if you haven't figured it out) have every other chapter end with '-ion' just for a challenge/sth interesting I guess. See if I can do it.
Happy Leap Day! I've been working on the story this morning. Got another chapter, will fix it, probably up by tomorrow!
GJFH: Thank you! Yes it is too bad...they can't avoid such things forever, though. You will have to wait for the next chapters to see what happens! ;)
Naomi: I fixed that sentence. This was a long chapter so I'm not surprised I missed something. :( You said "Jason's various boyfriends" I think you meant girlfriends. ;) She's not really, she's just been feeling a bit insecure and undeserving after all that's happened. Thank you! :)
Awesomegirl: It's funny how everyone pretty much has the same reaction. Yes...there is that nightmare...I don't want it to come true either. But I don't want to rule anything out for sure. Tasha...hm...we'll have to see where her character arc takes her. ;) Thank you! Your wish is my command! (if by soon you mean tomorrow)
-Chapter 7 of the story--I just started it. I want it to turn out just right.
-fun fact: The Mayflower hotel where they are at is a real hotel, though I may have put some embellishments for my own purposes.
Chapter 5 up! This is way longer even than the last chapter. I wonder if that'll become a trend...
They discuss Jason's first mission. I wasn't even sure that it'd be this country but it seemed to fit, especially with Jason's father honored. It is kind of weird when you flesh out a country from the few details given in one episode... it's either that or use a real country, which would also require research. Real countries will come into this, perhaps other "Odyssey" countries like Rakistan...
Chapter 4 up! It's longer than the other chapters so far. Both Jason and Connie's POVs.
I am still figuring out this story as evidenced by the trouble I had with the middle of it. I thought some things were working but I cut them totally out. I don't want the characters to get OOC. Or the story to get off track...I thought I knew what I was doing, then I wasn't sure. Maybe it's because I was writing in the evening after doing things, too tired or something. :(
Naomi: Jason does have something saved up so it won't be that bad to splurge this time. He wants to treat her, show her what she's worth to him, although he'll never be able to do enough to show how much he loves her. He wants this especially now because it was hard for him to be with her but the distance between them. I know that feeling too. Knives are a bit different than dresses! :)
Awesomegirl: Yes they are back to normal in some ways but not others. I'm not sure how normal their lives can ever be, at least as long as I won't leave them alone.
DancingInTheShire: Yes I'm going to spoil you! :) I will try to update more than I did with the last story but no guarantees.
GJFH: There will probably be actions scenes later on. Someone we know will appear in the next chapter.
-I intend to update tomorrow. I just finished Chapter 4 but it will need some editing. I got a bit stuck in the middle for some reason. Been busy/tired so my mind isn't working the greatest lately. Hopefully the next chapter will be ok.
Valentines week! Full of love of Connie and Jason! :) Chapter 3 up. I got a bunch of writing done over the weekend. I wanted to get further but new details keep coming up that I have to write before they can get to the party. They should get there in the next chapter!
I've had some time to write lately but I probably won't update this fast all the time. I have the first part of the next chapter too. I could've put more in this chapter but it seemed to have a natural ending and so I stopped there, and started with Jason's POV in the next chapter. Not sure if I'll do that with every chapter--does it work better that way? Would it be confusing for both of their POVs in the same chapter? I've done it before...but that's when they're separate. I've never been good at jumping from one POV to the next and it might not work. I could split POVs mid-chapter, but not sure if that makes sense either. Might work for certain things, who knows.
You can have expectations when you start writing, but you can never totally know where the story and characters will take you until after you start. When you get to the actual scene and they will do things that surprise you. That's a fun part of writing. It's all fun. Well, mostly.
Hopefully things don't get kind of weird because I do have a cold and that keeps me from thinking of the right words very fast and my mind goes odd places. I am not as good of a judge of what works and what doesn't.
Off to the next chapter!
Happy Valentines Day! Chapter 2 up. My but I had trouble with that last line. It is kind of a transition chapter but it is setting things up for what will happen later.
Going to write the next chapter now. Spend Valentine's with my fictional OTP. Not a bad way to spend it, if you ask me. :)
I've written Chapter 2. I will probably post it tomorrow once I can look at it and edit the mistakes. Right now my mind isn't clear enough to do that.
Bear with me; it's kind of a transition chapter. It'll get more to the main part of the story in the next chapter, which I'll try to write tomorrow, at least part of it.
Naomi: Thank you! I've already started the next chapter. I am sick but hopefully I will be better soon so I can work on it.
Awesomegirl: Thank you! I'm glad I'm jumping into this one from the last one. I've had this general idea for a while, but it's coming together with more specific things...I can't say much more yet. :) Yes I did make up Gray. He's not in the AIO series at all.
New story published! Generation. It may change but I think it'll stay because it has a double meaning. Which you may find out as you read the story. But it's in progress so even the summary may change. Tell me what you think!
--The first chapter is kind of a transition from A New Life to the next part of the story and so if you didn't read that one you might as well skip to the next chapter when it comes along. Which will start their next adventure. I just needed to tie up some emotional loose ends. And...it will still have bearing on the rest of the story because everything that happens before impacts what happens next.
--It may be rather rough because I'm still figuring out my ideas and it's rather a transition chapter but I wanted to get this out of the way.
I wrote the first chapter of the next story today. Yay! First new story in a while. Took a little while to get focused. Not sure what the name of the story will be yet, but I think I know the name of the chapter-- Forget-me-not. You'll know once you read it.
I'll post it tomorrow after I edit it.
Well I have started a new story. I had some notes and now I just wrote the first paragraphs. I may not use them if they don't work but a start is better than nothing.
It will be based off a picture. That will be the cover. It will transition from the last story to the next. Things are coming together!
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