Author has written 29 stories for Lost, Heroes, Ugly Betty, Dollhouse, Once Upon a Time, Grimm, True Blood, Borgias, Buffy: The Vampire Slayer, Hobbit, Harry Potter, Game of Thrones, and Power. Name: Joanna Location: Escondido, Ca Favorite Food: French fries, chicken, chocolate, sushi, pizza, cheeseburgers, Favorite Movies: Brown Sugar, Juno, Grandma's Boy, The Illusionist, Tyler Perry's The Family that Preys, Superbad, Letters to Juliet, The Great Muppet Caper, Harry Potter trilogy, Underworld trilogy, Trading Places, Spaceballs, Moonstruck, True Lies, Penelope, The Great Gatsby, The Departed, Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters, Favorite TV/Cartoon Shows: Once Upon a Time, Game of Thrones, Grimm, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Daria, Invader Zim, Bob's Burgers, Lost Favorite Actors: Johnny Depp, Dominic Monaghan, Robert Carlyle, Adam Sandler, Jeremy Irons, Mark Ruffalo, Terrence Howard, Colin O'Donoghue, Josh Dallas, Michael Socha, Tom Hiddleston, Seth Green, Michael Ealy, Robin Williams, Kit Harrington, Chris Hemsworth, Favorite Actresses: America Ferrera, Helena Bonham Carter, Maggie Smith, Ginnifer Goodwin, Jennifer Morrison, Emilie De Ravin, Lana Parrilla, Amy Acker, Lucy Liu, Drew Barrymore, Jennifer Hudson, Anne Hathaway, Favorite Quotes from Buffy the Vampire Slayer Spike (to Buffy and Angel) "You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love till it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other till it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children, it's blood...blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it." -Season 3 Episode 8 Evil Willow: "Oh, Buffy. You really need to have every square inch of your ass kicked." -Season 6 Episode 21 Favorites Quotes from Daria Daria: "Can you rig that glue gun of yours to shoot bullets? I'm ready to end my suffering." Jane: "Well, you're not your usually sunny self." Daria: "I've got a bump on my head, a bug bite on my arm, a sandwich on my ass..." Jane: "And all in front of Trent." Daria: "Now turn the knife counterclockwise." -Season 1 Episode 11 Jane (in a fake Southern accent about Daria's bridemaid's dress): "Oh, Scarlet, you grow lovelier by the day!" Daria: "I will you kill you, and bury your body in this dress." -Season 2 Episode 4 Favorite Quotes from Invader Zim Zim: "But Invader's blood marches through my veins, like giant radioactive rubber pants! The pants command me, do not ignore my veins!" -Season 1 Episode 1 Gir (covered in germs): "I'm gonna hug you!" Zim: "Nooooooooooooo!" (runs out the door) -Season 1 Episode 6 Zim: "Gir, finally! I need your help, I've been captured." Gir: "Yay!" Zim: "No, that's bad, Gir!" Gir: "Yay!" Zim: "I need you to listen very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very carefully." Gir: "What?" -Season 1 Episode 8 Zim: "At the end of this worm-hole is: A ROOM WITH A MOOSE!" -Season 1 Episode 12 Zim: "Gir, I am your master and you will obey me! Obey me! Please?" Zim: "Gir?" Gir: "Yes, master?" Zim: "I have your tacos." Gir: "Gimme!" Zim: "No Gir." Gir: "But I need tacos! I need them or I'll explode. That happens to me somtimes." Zim: "I will give you tacos. Oh such tacos I shall give! But you have to take us back to the base. They're only getting colder Gir." -Season 1 Episode 14 Zim: "Gir?" Gir: "Yes?" Zim: "What did you do to the telescope?" Gir: "Nothing." Zim: "You mean you didn't touch it? Something is broken and it's not your fault?" Gir: "I know, I'm scared too." -Season 1 Episode 16 Gaz: "Give me the Game Slave or else I will plunge you into a nightmare in which there is no wakening!" Iggins: "But, I'm a better gamer than you." Gaz: "I hope you like nightmare world!" (Gaz drops the batteries into the toilet) -Season 1 Episode 21 Favorite Quotes from Superbad: Seth: "You know when you hear a girl saying, 'Aw! I was so shit-faced last night. I shouldn't have fucked that guy.' We can be that mistake!" Evan (looking at Fogell's fake ID): "Wait, you changed your name to McLovin?" Fogell: "Yeah." Evan: "McLovin? What kind of stupid name is that Fogell? What are you trying to be an Irish R&B singer?" Fogell: "No, they let you pick any name you want when you get down there." Seth: "And you landed on McLovin?" Fogell: "Yeah, it was between that and Muhammad." Seth: "Why the fuck would it between that and Muhammad?! Why don't you pick a common name like a normal person?" Fogell: "Muhammad is the most commonly used name on Earth. Read a fucking book for once." Evan: "Fogell have you actually met anyone named Muhammad?" Fogell: "Have you actually met anyone named McLovin?" Seth: "No! That's why you picked a dumb fucking name!" Fogell: "Fuck you." Seth: "Gimme that. (takes the ID from Evan) All right you look like a future pedophile in this picture, number one. Number two it doesn't even have a first name it just says McLovin!" Fogell: "I am McLovin." Seth: "No you're not. No one's McLovin. McLovin's never existed because that's a made-up, dumb, fucking fairy tale name, you fuck!" Favorite Quotes from Juno: Mac: "Who's the father, Juno?" Juno: "It's Paulie Bleeker." Mac (disbelief): "Paulie Bleeker?" Juno: "What?" Mac: "I didn't know he had it in him." Leah (Juno's friend laughing): "I know, right?" Leah (reading adoption ads in the Penny Saver to Juno): "Look at this one 'wholesome, spiritually wealthy couple have found true love with love each other.' All that's missing is your bastard." Juno (in labor): "Ow, ow, fuckity-ow! Bren, when do I get that Spinal Tap thing?" Bren: "It's called a spinal block, and you can't have it yet, honey. The doctor said you're not dilated enough." Juno: "You mean I have to wait for it to get worse! Why can't they just give it to me now?" Bren: "Well, honey, doctors are sadists who like to play God and watch lesser people suffer." Juno: "As boyfriends go Paulie Bleaker is totally boss. He is the cheese to my macaroni." Mac: "In my opinion, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty...handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out of your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with." Juno: "I think I'm in love with you." Bleaker: "You mean as friends?" Juno: "No, I mean for real. Cause you're, like the coolest person I've ever met and you don't even have to try, you know..." Bleaker: "I try really hard, actually." Favorite Quotes from Underworld: Selene: "The war had all but ground to a halt in the blink of an eye. Lucian, the most feared and ruthless leader ever to rule the Lycan can had finally been killed. The Lycan horde scattered to the wind in a single evening of flame and retribution. Victory, it seemed, was in our grasp the very birthright of the Vampires. Nearly six centuries had passed since that night. Yet the anicent feud proved unwilling to follow Lucian to the grave. Though Lycans were fewer in number the war itself had become more perilous. For the moon no longer held her sway. Older, more powerful Lycans were now able to change at will. The weapons had evolved, but our orders remained the same: hunt them down and kill them off, one by one. A most successful campaign. Perhaps too successful. For those like me, a Death Dealer this signaled the end of an era. Like the weapons of the previous century, we, too, would become obsolete. Pity, because I lived for it." Lucian: "You're acting like a pack of rabid dogs! And that, gentlemen, simply will not do. Not if you expect to defeat the vampires on their own ground. Not if you expect to survive at all." |
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