Jeparlepasfrancais
hide bio
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 02-01-16, id: 7513707, Profile Updated: 01-02-18
Author has written 1 story for Harry Potter.

Single and reading fanfic to appease my desire to fall in love. In a relationship and reminding myself alternate endings are beautiful. Somewhere in between and just for fun!

Grad student in the USA, tequilitist, favorite color: grey. If you're looking for a beta let me know!

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Disappearances of Draco Malfoy by Speechwriter reviews
The night that Harry and Dumbledore return from the cave, the Death Eaters are delayed from reaching the top of the Astronomy Tower for one more minute. Draco Malfoy lowers his wand. / An AU in which Draco accepts Dumbledore's offer to fake his death and go into hiding with the Order of the Phoenix.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 309,858 - Reviews: 1043 - Favs: 892 - Follows: 1,228 - Updated: 6/18 - Published: 3/24/2020 - [Hermione G., Draco M.] Harry P., Ron W. - Complete
Like Brothers by Colubrina reviews
Minerva McGonagall steps in on the awful night the Potters are murdered and arranges to have Harry Potter raised by Sirius Black and his somewhat cousins, the Malfoys. Draco and Harry grow up as almost brothers and everything - well, almost everything - is different. Gryffindor!Draco. Dramione. AU. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 66 - Words: 167,571 - Reviews: 12780 - Favs: 6,189 - Follows: 7,943 - Updated: 6/8 - Published: 7/5/2015 - [Hermione G., Draco M.] Harry P., Sirius B. - Complete
The Only Beautiful Thing in the World by Speechwriter reviews
To most of the world, Tom Riddle is the perfect Avatar: diplomatic and prodigious, the pride of the Fire Nation. But Hermione Granger—healer, secret bloodbender, and member of a society that's tracked Riddle's moves meticulously—knows the truth. She knows what Riddle's planning once he masters the Avatar State. At the next full moon, she's going to make sure that never happens.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 60,804 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 5/27 - Published: 1/12
unsphere the stars by cocoartist reviews
When you can't change time, but you can't go forward, what is left? Hermione learns how to be the protagonist of her own story. [Tomione] COMPLETE!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 58 - Words: 235,852 - Reviews: 4470 - Favs: 3,461 - Follows: 3,114 - Updated: 2/8 - Published: 1/10/2012 - [Hermione G., Tom R. Jr.] Harry P., Albus D. - Complete
Unsinkable by Speechwriter reviews
He: a young man long since raised from poverty, now on the verge of inheriting a magnate's business in the 1910s. She: an impoverished young woman on her way to start a new life in America. In short: Tom Marvolo Riddle, Hermione Jean Granger, and one voyage on the RMS Titanic - and how it would change their lives forever.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 40,515 - Reviews: 371 - Favs: 451 - Follows: 495 - Updated: 12/18/2019 - Published: 8/23/2013 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Divination for Skeptics by olivieblake reviews
The latest in magical advancements is an enchantment that reveals romantic compatibility. Effectively eliminating uncertainty from dating, the charm's Hermione Granger-approved calculation of traits and preferences is a foolproof method of determining whether or not you've found The One. It's also, for Hermione, positively dreadful news. Dramione, post-war, soulmate AU. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 103,160 - Reviews: 1132 - Favs: 1,825 - Follows: 1,471 - Updated: 9/3/2019 - Published: 6/18/2019 - [Draco M., Hermione G.] [Harry P., Theodore N.] - Complete
Paradox by olivieblake reviews
Draco Malfoy wakes up one night to find Hermione Granger in his bed. But she's really not Hermione Granger at all, is she? Dramione, Year 7, Deathly Hallows AU. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 28 - Words: 166,184 - Reviews: 1838 - Favs: 1,480 - Follows: 1,183 - Updated: 10/19/2018 - Published: 6/4/2018 - [Draco M., Hermione G.] [Harry P., Theodore N.] - Complete
The First Rule of Film Club by SallyJAvery reviews
Sally Christmas fic 2017: It's the first Christmas after the War, and Harry and Hermione are back at Hogwarts. When they decide to watch 'It's a Wonderful Life' in the Room of Requirement, little do they know what's to follow. Twelve days of holiday fun, to be precise. Multi-pairing, mostly tbc. Please come and be excited with me!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 30,310 - Reviews: 462 - Favs: 425 - Follows: 253 - Updated: 3/13/2018 - Published: 12/25/2017 - [Hermione G., Draco M.] Harry P., Theodore N. - Complete
Prince by SallyJAvery reviews
The people of the city love gold and silver; they love silks and fine jewels. But they love secrets best of all. PottGrass, Venetian AU.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 33,938 - Reviews: 338 - Favs: 623 - Follows: 411 - Updated: 8/1/2017 - Published: 12/10/2016 - [Harry P., Daphne G.] [Draco M., Hermione G.] - Complete
Exceeds Expectations by Speechwriter reviews
Albus suggests that Snape employ some new teaching assistants: a pack of corgi puppies. Unabashed crackfic. Oneshot. I have no excuse for this.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,691 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 7 - Published: 12/17/2016 - Complete
Apple Pies and Other Amends by ToEatAPeach reviews
"It's a veritable PTSD tour. With pastries. And hand-skimmed clotted cream. And Hermione has no idea why she's doing it, but it's becoming very apparent that she is." Sometimes you're sad. Sometimes you need dessert. And sometimes, it's a little of both. [COMPLETE, DRAMIONE]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 30 - Words: 80,228 - Reviews: 1124 - Favs: 3,295 - Follows: 970 - Updated: 11/9/2016 - Published: 9/28/2016 - [Hermione G., Draco M.] Harry P., Ron W. - Complete
All Because of a Muggle Bookshop by Cora DeBlaere reviews
Years after the war, Hermione decides to leave the wizarding world. What starts as a vacation ends up being a new life with a new identity in a new country. Finding a job at a quaint bookshop, she settles into her new muggle life, leaving her old life as Hermione Granger behind. That is until a certain familiar blonde wanders in. Why is Malfoy living like a Muggle?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 77 - Words: 214,132 - Reviews: 1722 - Favs: 1,366 - Follows: 1,989 - Updated: 4/13/2016 - Published: 10/14/2014 - Harry P., Ron W., Hermione G., Draco M.
Romantic Idealism by Meowmers reviews
She falls in love with him when she's 12, but by the time she's 17 she wants him dead. For Tom Riddle, its vice versa. Tomione. AU. M for a reason.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 55,301 - Reviews: 591 - Favs: 2,264 - Follows: 817 - Updated: 3/27/2016 - Published: 3/12/2016 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Far Be It From Me by riptey reviews
Draco works in the dementia ward at St. Mungo's, and he loves his job, but he doesn't feel comfortable anywhere else. Recurring tremors in his hands make it hard for him to do things, and he's too embarrassed to let anyone see. So when his schoolboy crush, Hermione Granger, suddenly reappears in his life, all he can do is push her away. DMHG/EWE/for dramione remix (Donnie Darko)
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 15,437 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 176 - Follows: 57 - Published: 3/7/2016 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Comfortable by Meowmers reviews
He knew from the moment the little Weasley girl forced her way into his gang that there was going to be trouble. He just always assumed it would come from her army of brothers, not her red-hot pistol of a best friend. Tomione. Greaser AU. M for a reason.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,125 - Reviews: 126 - Favs: 900 - Follows: 202 - Published: 2/16/2016 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Same Old Love by midnightweeds reviews
Tom licked his lips. "Well. I'd like to live forever, I suppose." Her smile became a grin, "Wouldn't we all?" / / AU Tomione
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,383 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 203 - Follows: 143 - Updated: 12/24/2015 - Published: 10/16/2015 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
A Big Ball of Wibbly-Wobbly by Colubrina reviews
The war is over, the good guys have won, and Hermione Granger goes to sleep in her lovely flat only to wake up in 1953 in the bed of someone she'd really much rather were dead. "I'm working on the 'kill Lord Voldemort now, work out the temporal paradox issues later' plan," she tells him. He laughs. Tomione. COMPLETE
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 27,084 - Reviews: 1699 - Favs: 4,545 - Follows: 1,630 - Updated: 10/13/2015 - Published: 9/15/2015 - [Hermione G., Tom R. Jr.] Antonin D., Abraxas M. - Complete
The Muddy Princess by Colubrina reviews
Just another Pureblood!Hermione story. A hidden adoption revealed, a brother found, a new world to figure out: "What are you hoping for?" he asked as they stood ready to do the spell. "I don't know," Hermione admitted. "You?" His knuckles were white on his wand. "A sister," he said, his voice very low, "I'm hoping for a sister." Winner 2015 Energize WIP Awards. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 62,710 - Reviews: 4010 - Favs: 8,586 - Follows: 4,022 - Updated: 8/18/2015 - Published: 3/30/2015 - [Hermione G., Draco M.] Theodore N. - Complete
Crookscrux by cocoartist reviews
Cats have nine lives. Tom has a problem. [Horcrux!Crookshanks] [This is probably a crackfic]
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 996 - Reviews: 102 - Favs: 372 - Follows: 82 - Published: 8/15/2015 - [Tom R. Jr., Hermione G.] Crookshanks - Complete
Pinky Promise by provocative envy reviews
COMPLETE: Because her voice is light and airy and musical and the only thing he can come up with to compare it to is a cloud—which is crazy. Voices aren't clouds. Clouds aren't voices. Clouds are…clouds. They float and they're filled with rain and they cover up the sun. Luna's voice isn't like that all. Luna's voice might as well be the sun. MF/LL. (Companion to 'Bite Marks').
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 16,183 - Reviews: 205 - Favs: 194 - Follows: 81 - Updated: 7/5/2015 - Published: 4/23/2015 - Luna L., Marcus F. - Complete
Housemates by Colubrina reviews
Hermione Granger, graduate student, needs a cheap apartment that is free of excessive cats, groping men, or weird smells. Abraxas Malfoy wants another housemate. The only problem is Tom Riddle. AU. Really AU. No, really. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,767 - Reviews: 551 - Favs: 1,672 - Follows: 483 - Updated: 7/3/2015 - Published: 6/24/2015 - Abraxas M., Tom R. Jr., Hermione G. - Complete
The History Project by Colubrina reviews
Draco Malfoy finds a way to magically write notes in History of Magic but the only person the spell will work with is Hermione Granger, or so he claims. Continued from a series of drabbles that got out of control. AU. Dramione. COMPLETE
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 19 - Words: 15,937 - Reviews: 1398 - Favs: 2,049 - Follows: 896 - Updated: 6/30/2015 - Published: 5/19/2015 - [Draco M., Hermione G.] - Complete
Bite Marks by provocative envy reviews
TWO-SHOT: "So—you're upset," he says with a nonchalant nod and discreet adjustment of his slightly too-tight khaki corduroys. She blinks at him, her expression alternating between indignation and incredulity and flat-out fury. He had been right about her being pretty beneath the intimidation tactics. HG/DM. (Companion to 'Punch Drunk').
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 20,421 - Reviews: 330 - Favs: 1,447 - Follows: 397 - Updated: 4/12/2015 - Published: 3/22/2015 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Punch Drunk by provocative envy reviews
ONE-SHOT: On her twelfth day, she's standing next to a bank of stainless steel wire bird cages and clasping a shrink-wrapped package of pine wood shavings to her chest and legitimately praying for strength when Harry pauses in the doorway for no readily apparent reason other than to scowl disapprovingly in her general direction and that just. No. That's it. PP/HP.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 13,746 - Reviews: 140 - Favs: 591 - Follows: 126 - Published: 2/28/2015 - Harry P., Pansy P. - Complete
Youth in Retrospect by provocative envy reviews
ONE-SHOT: She's buying a box of condoms when she meets him. HG/TR.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,498 - Reviews: 204 - Favs: 1,745 - Follows: 276 - Published: 12/27/2014 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Breaking and Entering by provocative envy reviews
ONE-SHOT: Hermione Jean Granger is a good girl—until Tom Riddle comes to town. HG/TR.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,051 - Reviews: 84 - Favs: 616 - Follows: 145 - Published: 10/18/2014 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
The Deadline by Lena Phoria reviews
It takes the unexpected engagement of their children to get Draco and Hermione in a room together, but only the selfish acts of their estranged spouses and a 300 Galleon bottle of firewhiskey will get them in a bedroom. What starts out as a one time mistake soon becomes a full-blown affair with a deadline; the day their children say 'I do'. But things rarely go according to plan.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 39 - Words: 329,548 - Reviews: 3676 - Favs: 5,535 - Follows: 2,729 - Updated: 10/3/2014 - Published: 11/8/2013 - [Hermione G., Draco M.] [Rose W., Scorpius M.] - Complete
Salt and Brine by provocative envy reviews
ONE-SHOT: "Can I get a small, hot, quad quarter-sweet tres leches latte, ristretto, with three pumps of vanilla and a drizzle of cinnamon?" Edmond Lestrange asks, bouncing on the balls of his feet. She clenches her jaw. "And you, Tom?" she says, ballpoint pen poised over a to-go cup. HG/TR.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,461 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 457 - Follows: 112 - Published: 9/18/2014 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Nightmare by provocative envy reviews
COMPLETE: A broken time turner shouldn't have sent me back so far. It was unprecedented. Stepping on it-smashing it-nothing should have happened. At most, I should have lost a week. At worst, I should have disappeared altogether. I shouldn't have traveled back fifty-two years; half a bloody century. This should not have happened. HG/TR.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 30 - Words: 163,513 - Reviews: 2005 - Favs: 4,015 - Follows: 2,046 - Updated: 7/1/2014 - Published: 10/17/2012 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
With Teeth by provocative envy reviews
ONE-SHOT: Albus Dumbledore had been wrong about Voldemort's horcruxes. There had never been just seven—or eight, technically, if Harry's scar was being counted. There had been seven hundred and seventy-seven. HG/DM.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,736 - Reviews: 137 - Favs: 1,088 - Follows: 161 - Published: 4/26/2014 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Daddy Dearest by ImmortalObsession reviews
It is 1895 in England. Purebloods are the supremacy. Dumbledore rules them all. Lord Malfoy, one of his many devout followers, has a daughter no one has ever seen. The daughter herself, Hermione Malfoy, never questions the strict rules standing between her and everyone else – that is, until Master Riddle arrives and makes her think twice. AU/OOC/Rated M for dark themes.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 108,384 - Reviews: 546 - Favs: 1,132 - Follows: 584 - Updated: 11/10/2013 - Published: 4/20/2013 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Shared Flame by Lady Miya reviews
It all started when two normally clever individuals both had a really lousy day.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Drama - Chapters: 49 - Words: 311,604 - Reviews: 1188 - Favs: 1,090 - Follows: 678 - Updated: 7/6/2013 - Published: 2/22/2011 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Capitulate by uchiha.s reviews
The Mirror of Erised shows us our desires — but can it grant them? Oneshot, written for Winterblume for the GC Tomione Convention Secret Santa Gift Exchange. HG/TMR
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,972 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 276 - Follows: 99 - Published: 12/31/2012 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
The Flatmate by attica reviews
After the Ministry seizes all of Draco Malfoy's possessions - including his beloved Malfoy Manor - he takes up drinking and finds himself taking up temporary residence at Hermione Granger's flat in Wizarding London. But what neither of them expect is that a lot can happen in 139 days in such close quarters - even the impossible. DHr. COMPLETE!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 44,030 - Reviews: 436 - Favs: 1,278 - Follows: 441 - Updated: 8/16/2012 - Published: 1/2/2008 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Mind Pop by riptey reviews
*1st Place both Readers' & Participants' Choice at dramione remix* Hermione stares down the limitations of linear time, while a memory-less fragment of Draco's conscious mind looks for a place to spend the night. D/Hr, EWE
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 28,102 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 157 - Follows: 28 - Published: 4/28/2012 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Avada Kedavra Anonymous by Speechwriter reviews
No one missed Riddle's pale fist tightening around the useless wand in his lap. "I am Tom," he ground out. "I am here for the sole reason that the alternative was community service." / Hermione moderates a post-Avada Kedavra support group. Chaos ensues.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,409 - Reviews: 225 - Favs: 1,197 - Follows: 219 - Published: 2/24/2012 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Friend Number Three by riptey reviews
COMPLETE - How do you deal with the Pureblood aristocracy, Ministry corruption, Muggle culture invasions, and constant questions about your love life while juggling more than two friends and not being a total jerk? Don't ask Draco: he doesn't know. D/Hr
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 26 - Words: 138,388 - Reviews: 669 - Favs: 1,224 - Follows: 492 - Updated: 12/1/2011 - Published: 6/4/2009 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Broken Yolk by attica reviews
COMPLETE! "You know that love really isn't what they say it is, right? In the books? In the fairytales? Nobody comes and rescues you from your tower. Nobody fights off a big bad witch or even slays a dragon." A story in which everyone wants someone other than the one they're with. Post-Hogwarts, ultimately D/Hr.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 28,618 - Reviews: 273 - Favs: 612 - Follows: 195 - Updated: 5/26/2011 - Published: 8/20/2008 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Side to Side by riptey reviews
COMPLETE one-shot. Seated together at the Ministry's annual Christmas Ball, Draco and Hermione might get bored enough to discuss certain events in their shared past. Or maybe they'll just get drunk. -written for dramione advent on LJ, happy holidays!-
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,926 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 213 - Follows: 28 - Published: 12/19/2010 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
The Politician's Wife by pir8fancier reviews
Hermione hates Draco in the springtime, Hermione hates Draco in the fall, Hermione hates Draco 247.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 14 - Words: 68,629 - Reviews: 747 - Favs: 2,512 - Follows: 838 - Updated: 5/23/2010 - Published: 10/14/2005 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Sucker Punch by riptey reviews
COMPLETE D/Hr EWE - Sometimes you want to punch somebody. Other times, you're the one getting hit.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 85,225 - Reviews: 380 - Favs: 696 - Follows: 310 - Updated: 5/3/2010 - Published: 7/13/2009 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Cauterize by Lady Altair reviews
"Of course it's missing something vital. That's the point." Dennis Creevey takes up his brother's camera after the war.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,648 - Reviews: 1763 - Favs: 8,557 - Follows: 1,134 - Published: 3/24/2008 - Dennis C. - Complete
Masters of Manipulation by Nerys reviews
A true manipulator will control the universe, but who will achieve the wanted mastership? Hermione suddenly finds herself opposing Tom Riddle in a quest for knowledge banned by the founders of Hogwarts. Can she stop the heir before he becomes invincible?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 25 - Words: 162,885 - Reviews: 550 - Favs: 1,034 - Follows: 347 - Updated: 10/20/2007 - Published: 8/21/2007 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Piledriver Waltz reviews
She's sitting in a tacky diner following yet another breakup when he shows up. Dinky little one-shot inspired by the Arctic Monkeys' Piledriver Waltz. DM/HG. It's my first fic ever y'all, be nice! M for language (I love the f word).
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,932 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/1 - Harry P., Ron W., Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete